———— After finishing her meal, Lacey found her mind wandering to less desirable thoughts once more. Her lack of self-control in limiting thoughts she did not wish to have surprised her - not that she had ever had a talent with such things. She scanned the room for a familiar face - blue eyes wandering over each member of their community. To see everyone smiling and enjoying themselves when usually they were all merely going about their days was refreshing. It had been so long since they had been able to relax together.

Her eyes finally landed on one of her friends, the woman seemingly breaking from entertaining others, causing her feet to move towards her. "Hey, there beautiful." She teased, bumping her shoulder against the other woman's. "Got some time for me?" She questioned, her lips turning upwards in a warm smile.

-*-

Lacey was Jake’s ‘the one who got away’. The one he let slip through his fingers due to his inability to love anyone but himself. She had very nearly gotten through to him and made him realise that there was more to life than his own selfish desires. But her patience worn out before his stubbornness had and so she walked away with her broken heart and Jake carried on like he always did, as if he hadn’t lost anything. 

It took facing the end of the world with the company of a two year old for Jake to finally learn how to love someone other than himself. That two year was the now the very wriggly 7 year old he held in his arms. Through Erin, Jake opened his heart and was able to put someone else’s needs above his own. Because of that, he ended up adopting four more kids, his Mighty Ducks and now, he wouldn’t know what to do with himself if anything happened to any of them. 

There had been times over the last five years when Lacey crossed his mind with thoughts of what might have been. It was useless chasing after what ifs because he assumed he’d never see her again. There was no way for him to make amends of his past behaviour which he now recognised to be extremely shitty. Lacey had deserved so much better than him. 

But here she was, in front of him with tears in her eyes. He wanted to pull her into his arms but he had no right to that or her in any way, shape or form. He was lucky she hadn’t tried to hit him or kick him in the nuts; even if she had done those things, he wouldn’t have blamed her for it. She was not happy to see him.

Erin poked Jake in the cheek. “Hey,” she demanded. “Why’s the pretty lady crying? What did you do?” By now she had figured out it was Jake’s fault Lacey was upset. Erin was a smart kid, smarter than he’d ever be, and despite her limited education she was able to pick up on emotional cues that most other people missed. 

Jake ignored Erin’s queries because he was too busy trying to figure out how to explain himself, and by extension the Mighty Ducks, to Lacey. Everything he had come up with so far sounded more and more ridiculous in his own mind. But Lacey had asked the question and she deserved the truth.

“So we started in Vancouver-” oh Jeez, he was going to try and tell her everything all at once “-and by we, I mean me and Erin here. I’m not actually her Dad. Well, I am but not biologically.”

“He found me!” Erin interjected.

“Right, thanks. We travelled down from Canada and then across the US and then we found Cody-” Jake motioned behind him at the older boy who was currently holding his younger brother and spinning around as fast as he could. “Cody, put Leo down before you both get hurt! Anyway, we found Cody, then we found Cass, Leo and Willow. And then I have these five kids and kids are hard work and I needed help so we came here because they have a school here. So that’s the short version of how we got here.

“You look great by the way.”

———— Hope died a slow death, shedding each petal until there was nothing remaining. Life seemed dull since she had left him, the colors losing vibrancy unexpectedly. The world order had not only shifted beneath her feet due to the pandemic but also with the loss of love. It was such a tender thing, to love. She had opened her entire self to him, gifted him things she never had offered to others before. Lacey had been truly happy with him despite their differences and his inability to see past his own face. He was full of himself, narcissistic, non-committal, and sometimes a jerk - but he was the person she had loved the most. Nights had been consumed by thoughts of what would be said if she ever gained the chance of his company again. In the showers, she dreamed up conversations she believed to be mere figments of her imagination. Now that the opportunity to speak these things into existence presented itself, she had nothing left to say. What could she say to him? Should she explain how furious she was with him for acting the way he did or touch on how hurt she still was over everything? Such things were left in the past far before then, lost forever to the winds of time.

As he began to explain himself, the words floated past her head. None of it stuck inside her brain, as she was so conflicted after seeing these things. She almost pinched herself in disbelief, yet thought better of it. The end of his statement drove her to offer a teary smile, some droplets falling gently down her cheeks. Although his views on commitment seemed to have shifted, there was still a glimmer of his past self that survived within. No matter the severity of their arguments, he had always provided her a good laugh to make her feel better after it was all over. Often, she was still upset but forgave him as her laughter rang through either of their apartments. As she mulled over the information he provided, she felt some sense of relief. At least he had not fathered the children biologically, had not replaced her in his heart - if she had ever even been within it in the first place. Her gaze looked at the young girl that was glued to his side. She definitely admired her 'dad' very much, leading Lacey to believe that he was a better father than she had ever anticipated.

"I can see you're different than before. I guess the end of the world did bring some good." She teased, her eyes brimming with tears despite the calm that had come over her. It was not easy for her to let go of the pain that had surfaced at the sight of him. That was the most unexpected thing for her - that she was unable to remain calm in his presence. Her hands tightened around the feed basket that had resided in them the entire time.

"I'm glad you found them, it seems you've learned to love someone more than yourself. I'm so proud of you and thank you, I guess the manual labor has improved my figure." She sucked a sharp air through her nose, eyes darting elsewhere as one of her hands raised to wipe a tear away.

-*-

“You hear that? The pretty lady said I’m pretty,” Erin squealed with delight. 

“I’ve told you that a million times,” Jake said, wincing as Lacey started to walk away and as Erin started to climb down from his back by going over his shoulder and practically crawled down his front, complete with a brief kick to the face from Erin as she went. 

“You don’t count since you’re my Dad-Duck,” Erin explained as she landed on the ground. “You have to tell me nice things.” 

Before Jake realised what she was up to, Erin dashed off to put herself in Lacey’s path. The small child grinned up at Lacey and Jake could see the all-too-familiar glint of mischief in Erin’s eyes. 

“Cody, Cass?” Jake called back to the older two of his kids. “Make sure Leo and Willow don’t harass the animals, OK?” Leo and Willow voiced their protests but Cody and Cass did their best to control their younger siblings and save the animals from being bothered too much. Jake could trust those kids to behave while he reigned in Erin and let Lacey get away.

Did it sting that Lacey’s first instinct after seeing him again was to run away? Yeah, it sure did, but he couldn’t really blame her. It wasn’t like the last time they had seen each other had gone all that smoothly. Even though it was more than five years later, Jake still didn’t have the vocabulary to apologise properly for his past behaviour but he did recognise that he didn’t deserve a warm welcome from Lacey.

“How do you know my Dad?” Erin asked Lacey. “Do you know him from the before-times?”

Jesus, how was Jake going to explain this to Lacey? One of the many things they used to argue about was his utter disdain of settling down and starting a family. Back then he had claimed he’d never be a father. Now here he was with five kids in tow, all of which called him ‘Dad’. He wasn’t their biological father but that didn’t matter to them. Together, they were a family and they were going to stick together through thick and thin. But his current situation was light-years from what he used to be, as Lacey knew him back then.

“Erin, honey, please leave Lacey alone,” Jake jogged over to where Erin was blocking Lacey’s path. He scooped Erin up into his arms and stepped to the side, allowing Lacey enough room to resume her escape. “She’s got a lot to do and none of it involves us.”

———— Heart felt dense within an encumbered chest, descending lower into her frame for reasons she did not comprehend. Time slowed as her gaze transferred from the children to his, eyes meeting in somewhat of a daze. Her feet transferred weight, body shifting in discomfort - it felt as though she was observing a ghost of a life she no longer lived. Each second that passed causing dread to seep deeper into the depths of her soul. He was a stranger traveling the line between two lives - one lived and one presently experienced. A man who danced in different aspects of her mind, consistently bouncing between the memories she cherished and those she yearned to rid herself of. How dare he emerge at this a time, in a world so different than the one she had loved him in? Where she had gifted him her most valuable asset and he had given her nothing but agony to ponder for years to come. She partially blamed this man for the events that tormented her dreams. Had he stayed with her, grown and changed for their relationship's benefit as she requested, her path would never have crossed with the despicable man who was previously her fiancé. However, she had a grasp on the fact that it was truly her who was to blame for her poor decisions - but at the moment, there was no opportunity to shake such blame from him.

Her feet made their best effort to provide her with an escape - running had always been what she did best. An obstruction rapidly presented itself in the form of a child, referring to her ex-lover as Dad. Dad. The word nestled itself in the cracks of her golden crown - setting forth the notion that Jake had indeed met someone else to love in her place. This thought was not akin to happiness, rather it disturbed her unexpectedly. She had once considered herself the owner of the hope that he would change in her favor. Lacey had pined after the idea that he could cherish her enough to change himself into the man she hungered for. How desperately she had pursued the outcomes she wanted. However, these things never came to fruition. He had always loved himself and the taste of freedom on his tongue more than her. How she craved for time to turn back, so she could prevent herself from providing him with her heart. She could stop him from smiling at her beneath the light under that street lamp among the inky sky, that was the moment she had become weak for him. As these thoughts devoured her clear head, her emotions flashed obviously across her delicate features. The talent of concealing things of emotional nature had never been something she learned. This had once assisted her in her career, but now it only betrayed her. There had once been a longing within her to mother his children, yet someone had clearly taken up such a role already. Perhaps the female was even traveling with him, residing beneath the same roof as she - pride should have overtaken her for he was clearly opening himself to someone else, yet jealousy took its place.

When the child was removed from her path, she felt as though she was unable to move - her feet refusing her orders to take another step. There had been so many things left unsaid, it was as though they were being gifted a second chance at something - even if it was to merely work through the bad blood. Recollections of their past mostly inhabited the joyful section of her head, but there were certain moments she filed into the sadder sections of her brain. It would be wonderful to sort those out, so she could live her life without a chip upon her shoulder.