maybe you MILLENIALS would be able to afford a house if you stopped spending your money at your local diner’s jukebox buying twenty one (21) plays of what’s new pussycat with one (1) play of it’s not unusual in the middle
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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trying on a metaphor
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JBB: An Artblog!
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@oddlydone
maybe you MILLENIALS would be able to afford a house if you stopped spending your money at your local diner’s jukebox buying twenty one (21) plays of what’s new pussycat with one (1) play of it’s not unusual in the middle

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This is one of my favorite posts because that cat’s fucking name is fucking meatloaf
Let us just appreciate that this person’s dad didn’t know when they would be home and so he couldn’t plan for them to be able to join the family for dinner, but he knew with no doubts that dear sweet Meatloaf staying in that exact position for hours was an absolute in this scenario. Truly, that cat was named well.
one of my favorite posts on tumblr over the course of 5 fucking years.. clearly i need a life
Meatloaf is a reliable cat and did not steal the money for selfish reasons. A rare friend.
I love Meatloaf. :)
Bless Meatloaf
Reblog Money Meatloaf to get surprise $40
You know I’m not sure cats actually understand cats either
We live in an age where you can press a button and a deep web hitman shows up at your door and kills you. Technology is incredible.
what button
what fucking button
Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003), dir. Quentin Tarantino

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me: drinking tea, enjoying life, wearing a cute outfit me, not even ten seconds later: sobbing, dying, feeling worthless and suicidal, wishing i were never born, suffering, dying, and dying,,
adhd is a bullshit disorder like i can’t clean my room to save my life because i’m Too Busy staring at a wall. what the fuck kind of shit is that.
me: *suddenly has tears running down cheeks*
ppl: …….are u ok???
me: yeah this just kind of happens sometimes haha ha
some tiny-titted binch: don't wear bras let your titties live!!!!! i never wear bras!!!!!!!!!
me, a godless titty goblin, made of 90% titty: i haven't taken this bra off for forty years

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a secret code between women: are you safe? in a contact of eyes. i’m here if you need me, the littlest shift of a skirt, of an inclined head, of watching the man who is asking you to smile, bitch. you aren’t alone on the walls of restrooms, i was where you are too. the quiet doling of emergency numbers, the shelters. the space between two women in a largely empty train station. the waiting game of two women strangers who walk, quietly and quickly, to their cars in abandoned parking lots, who watch to be sure the other leaves safely. text me you get home safe. the tally marks of drinks on hidden wrists, carefully disguised as other things ever since men picked up on what it meant and used it to target the “weakest link.”
my father tells me we have nothing to worry about. last night he sent me one of those email chains that say at the top “Safety Tips For The Women In Your Life!!!! Don’t Let Her Die!!”
me, and the stranger on the train. she is asleep and the man is asking me who i am going home to. i feel tears pricking the sides of my eyes. i am 13 while he towers over me. he reaches out one hand, and while i don’t know how she knows, she speaks up without opening her eyes: “If you touch my daughter, sir, I will murder you.” Whatever he grumbles is lost in history, because this moment I am so grateful for the existence of other people that I cannot breathe.
I am 19 and on my phone when i become aware of a 13 year old girl is smiling nervously at a man who’s saying disgusting things. I grab her arm. “There you are, cindy,” I say, and then look at the man like he is bile. “Do you need something from my sister?” i ask, and i walk away with her. she cries later.
this is the way of things: a silent, secret web. our promise to each other that despite our differences, when it comes to the wire, we become family, instantly. the unspoken promise. i’m here. i’m watching. i’ll witness.
This is beautiful.
remember twilight and how edward and bella couldn’t do it bc edward was afraid he’d fuck her to death?
i remember bella willing to die for the dick
we cant really be mad at baby boomers for not getting it. they didn’t live in the same era we live in now. they didnt have the adventures of jimmy neutron: boy genius to teach them right from wrong

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2017 were all gonna stop posting self deprecating and “I wanna die” memes
you’ll have to pry my morbid coping mechanisms from my cold, dead hands