Ancient History

               VIOLET FELT LIKE SHE HAD BEEN LONELY ALL OF HER LIFE. Before she had swallowed all of these pills because she was so damn miserable and terrified, she had been a depressed teenage girl enduring the late night arguments coming from her parent’s bedroom. She didn’t fit in with anyone at school and she didn’t know if that was more peaceful than being at home or if she should be counting the hours until she could go home and hide out in her bedroom. Then she was dead, the loneliest existence at all. There was no moving on into something better and peaceful where she didn’t have a shred of sadness or worry but where her mind could be free. She didn’t really know if she believed in heaven and hell, but being trapped in this place made her feel like neither really did exist. The only one she thought she’d have forever was Tate when she learned they were both dead, trapped in this house as ghosts. 

               THAT WAS ALL FUCKED UP BECAUSE OF HIM. He had done so many horrible, evil things that he couldn’t come back from and as much as he pleaded for her forgiveness, or just paying him any attention, she couldn’t do it. How could she be expected to? He didn’t just kill those students at Westfield but violated her mom and still managed to look her in the eye like he was this innocent boy. It made her sick to her stomach. 

               The ghost girl trotted down the stairs to the house like it was part of her daily routine now. She yearned for a cigarette but was out of a pack. Someone on the outside was going to have to come here so she could get some. She highly doubted Constance would be up to the task. That woman was too busy raising her half-brother to care anymore about the spirits in this house, including her own children. She passed by the office her father used to work in, spotting Tate out of the corner of her eye. She should have kept walking, IGNORING HIM as she had been doing all along, but something had her stopping in her tracks.  ❝ 1,823? ❞  She speaks just outside of the doorway. It’s a genuine question as she wonders what it means, but she’s not quite sure how open she is to a conversation at all with her ex-boyfriend.

tate grew to comfort with the loneliness, yet, it wasn’t his choice.  he’d rather have her. it wasn’t an exact comfort that anyone would be rather to enjoy, but it was something.  the house was littered with ghosts, but tate took no interest to more than he did take interest.  hayden always was around, offering herself to him, but he took nothing from her.  nora had always been more a mother than constance had been, yet even her companionship wasn’t enough. tate found himself wanting to be alone, and he found himself more alone in the doctors office than any other place.

he was startled by the familiar voice, his eyes still sealed shut.  he didn’t even have to look at the person to know it was violet.  it took a moment to register in his mind.  it had nearly been 5 years since she spoke to him, but his body registered it as something more constant.  “oh.’’ tate softly spoke, rustling himself up from the leather couch.

“5 years.’‘ he answered back, feet away from the female, seeing her silhouette form inside the very room he laid.  “since we spoke, that is.’’ he answered before she could question anything more.  it was insane to think, that tate still lingered with thoughts of violet, how desperate he was for her to forgive him.  he had done such wrong, yet he wanted everything to be so right.  he wasn’t use to not getting his way.

She was so used to being the odd one out. So it didn’t really surprise her when popular kids like Chloe or Kyle gave her strange looks for hanging out in the smoker’s pit. 1994, the year where things were grungy, MTV was alive and Daria was everyone’s hero. Violet sat on top of the brick, a cigarette was lit up and she exhaled the smoke off to the side. Sure enough, there he was. Tall, languid, always wore his silver serpent thumb ring and had that messy mop of blonde hair. He was perfect yet so imperfect. Sadly, the girl had no idea what rage was lurking inside of him. What he was about to do soon. Perhaps days? A week from now? “I know, I know.” Violet held up the box of cigarettes and pretended to squint to read the fine print. “Those things will kill me.” She snorted, remembering his usual words when they greeted each other. “Typical corporate trying to protect their asses, in case of death–read the tiny print, we told you so.” The blonde took another drag of her cigarette and patted the seat beside her. “Mr. CarMichael almost made me sleep today. He really should think of doing books on cassette tapes.” Finally, her curiosity had gotten the best of her. She leaned forward to swipe the notebook from under Tate’s arm, wanting to know desperately what was inside of it. He often looked so lost, but so focused when he scribbled and wrote in it. “What secrets is the great Tate Langdon hiding?” Violet teased. He looked tired though. “Larry being a shithead again?” She frowned. They had lived across the street from each other for years, Constance was never her favorite and often all they had to do was waltz right up to his room because the older woman was always passed out from booze. “Come on. Tell me.”

@oblivicnn

the planned had been set for weeks, as tomorrow would mark the day that tate would surely come across someone not to be messed with.  tate had always been a unique individual, but he hadn’t always been like this. remembering a child, tate tried to make friends, but he seemed to come off as ‘strange’ or ‘weird’ those words still lingered thru his mind to this day.  tate kept to himself, rarely interacting with many, his classmates were moronic, and his time was usually spent caught up in video games or books.  tate had even been criticized by his selection on his reading.  been suspended for simply asking the librarian for collections of historical violence.  tate was who he was, and he kept to himself, and it was fine with him, except for violet.  she had been his only friend, for some time now.

“nothing more than the chemicals we consume through our food nowadays.’‘ tate muttered, his mind still focused on his notebook, scribbling the last few details.  he had altered his plans everyday, changing what seemed to be everything, from what time, to what way to take, to where to start.  shaking his head at his mistakes. tate knew how crucial it was, how he needed to make sure that everything was PERFECT.

( ℳ ♛: @oblivicnn )

She sat on the floor in the now abandoned house in the room that had once been Tate’s. THE ROOM THAT HE DIED IN. She didn’t know why she was even there - it wasn’t like she was going to ever see him again - she just needed to be close to him and that was the closest she could get. She still couldn’t believe that her best friend and the only boy she’d ever loved was gone forever - it had been almost a month and some days it still felt like it was just a bad dream she’d wake up from.

❛❛ I’M SORRY I LEFT YOU SO SOON. I’M SO SORRY.❜❜ The sound of a familiar voice caused Madison to jump and she looked up confused to see Tate standing in front of her. He looked as real as the last time she saw him alive but she knew that her mind had to be playing tricks on her. “No…you’re dead…” She hated even saying those words but she knew they were true. “I…went to your funeral…” It had been a horrible service to endure with Constance trying to draw all the attention to herself as always. God, she hated that woman and she was sure that Tate’s death had been partially her fault - just a few nights before it happened he’d been at her house upset about her and his creep of a brother.

When he wasn’t disappearing she stood up and cautiously reached out to touch him. “I can’t believe this is real…” Whether it was her imagination or not she wasn’t going to let the moment slip away. She wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his chest breathing in his familiar scent. “I’m pissed as hell at you…” Madison couldn’t decide if she was more angry or upset with him. “Just tell me why you did it? Why did you do something to tear us apart? You are all I had…”

the days continued on, as tate could only agree that he was in some type of limbo.  the events leading to the pain in his chest, seemed to be trivial at this point.  he could feel the burning in his chest, the exact points of contact that brought him to his knees.  tate knew he was dead, he knew exactly why as well.

tate couldn’t describe what was going on in his head, not even to his beloved madison.  he wish he could bring words up to her, to tell the darkness of his mind, yet whenever he brought up anything about his feelings or thoughts, he drew a blank.  but mostly, he was afraid he would scare her off.  madison was good for him, and he once thought she could cure whatever damage his mind was, yet, he was too dark.

“i’m sorry.’‘ his mouth muttered, feeling her body against his.  he hated what he had done, he had torn them apart, and it wasn’t even his intentions.  “i just wanted all the pain to go away madison, you don’t understand.’‘ he silenced, feeling his body just grow heavier, the burning only growing hotter.  “i didn’t want to bring you down madison, you don’t deserve that.’‘ he knew what he did was wrong, but all tate could think about was curing himself, helping himself, yet he made a huge mistake.

shea’s head tilted as he spoke. “i guess my daddy did most of it. even before he got sick, mama didn’t seem like she wanted to have kids, but got stuck with me. always reminded me of it, too.” standing straight up, she looked at the clock. “i gotta go clock out…” she said slowly, grabbing her cup off of the counter. “will i see you again, mr darling?”

shea stopped as he spoke, glancing over her shoulder a little. boys really were stupid, especially kit when it came to his feelings. but of course, that had never changed how she felt about him. she had always just thought that he would come around. but maybe…maybe what he needed was a push. turning back to face him, she walked over, stopping in front of him, head tilting back a little to gaze up at him. she’d almost forgotten how much taller than her he was, it was honestly one of her favorite things about him, and she could swear she felt her heart skip a beat as she scanned his face, taking in every little thing she’d missed. “kit walker, i never got with any of those boys because you’re the only one i wanted. i couldn’t leave here ‘cause i couldn’t risk you comin’ back and me not bein’ here…”

( ℳ ♛ : @oblivicnn )

The sounding of an insistent tapping at her window woke Madison up from her sleep and she sat up in bed rubbing at her eyes before looking over at the clock on her nightstand.2:30AM. She knew only one person would show up in the middle of the night. TATE. He had a variety of reasons he would do it - COMFORT, SEX, DRUGS, A PLACE TO HIDE - and that night she really hoped it was an easy one to take care of so she could go back to sleep. She was just as used to these middle of the night wake-up calls as he was - they took turns sneaking into each other’s rooms when things got too rough. The two had known each other since they were just children and they only had each other to rely on for comfort so they ended up seeking each other out a lot.

She got up went to the window to open it so Tate could lower his lanky body into the room. After he was safely inside she closed it and reached up to cup his chin pressing a soft kiss to his lips before pulling back to look at him. She didn’t see any new marks - just the fading ones that were almost healed from his last fight with his mother - but that didn’t mean the bitch hadn’t hurt him in some other way. Or maybe it was his brother. She took his hand and led him over to the bed slipping under the covers and waiting for him to join her before asking him any questions. He’d talk when he was ready but sometimes he just needed a little push. “What happened?” A hand reached up to brush some blonde locks back from his face. “And don’t you dare try to say nothing.”

It had been another one of those nights.  the nights tate continued to think would finally vanish, but it just took time, time before another outbreak.  it was easy finding comfort in madison.  it always had been. ever since tate find himself climbing up trees, there was always access to madison’s room. she was his comfort, as he was hers, although he seemed to use her more than she did him. his fingers gripped against the wood of the tree, feeling the bark dig into his fingernails.  it was always the same, no matter how long the time had been, tate always ended up here, or at least near her.  

“1,823′‘ tate muttered under his breath as he laid against the black leather couch, his fingers dance against the top, feeling the wears that was it.  his eyes shut, hiding his blues, his mind wandering, only wishing for it all to end, for everything to end.  tate had no purpose here, he never did.  he was a monster, like she had said, he was evil, a terrible person. it all ran thru his mind ever since she had spoken the words.  “go away.’’ the words echoed thru his head, ringing every inch of his mind.  it had been all his fault, he blamed himself for it.  this was how tate was born, he was born with the darkness, it wasn’t something that was taught to him.  tate knew at a young age that his calling had been something evil. tate distinctly remembered his own mother trying to preach God on to him, yet something about the words she spoke were utterly wrong.  he knew it wasn’t his calling, he knew exactly the wrong in everything that He was.  

shea watched him thoughtfully for a moment, mulling over his question for minute as she finished off her coffee and poured herself another cup. “Well…nothin’, i guess. it’s never much fun around here. i guess i just stick around ‘cause daddy’s dyin’ and someone’s gotta be there for him while my ma is out fuckin’ any boy that gives her the time of day.” of course admitting that wasn’t a big deal to her. everyone on town knew what her mother did in her spare time. and shea got just as many dirty looks from women around town as her mother did.