Shenanigans Among Demons

Do you want to get lost in fervent devotion? Until your throat is raw from chanting words of worship at the top of your voice, and your eyes watering since you cannot bear to even not look at him for a fleeting moment? If so, you are at the right place.

Avoid the above by ensuring not to stare into the demon eyes for a moment too long—be lost in them once—and you will be lost forever. I'll let you in on a little secret-not even the eldest is immune to this particular 'ability' of his.

Him and Solomon have a pact. The latter will be elaborated upon in the upcoming rules. This piece of knowledge is vital for you.

Take any gifts he bestows upon you with caution. Sure, the hand mirror crafted by the finest architects in the Devildom and with a handle made of obsidian is breathtaking, but is it worth using in exchange for your devotion to him? Only and only him?

Be wary when you are in his room. The plants are alive, in the sense that they eat flesh. And a living, breathing human is in the vicinity.

Asmodeus might invite you with him to bathe. His bathroom is separate from the rest—lavishly decorated, but exercise caution. Demons bathe at temperatures of 150 degree celsius for a lukewarm bath, and at a hundred degree celsius water boils. And beings of this realm haven't had a human visit in so long, they are likely to forget your anatomy.

Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. A universal fact. But remember to not show your preference more for any other in his presence. He is the most beautiful. The most desired. The most cherished. Still a Jewel of Hell, if not Heavens. How dare you think of him as lesser?!

Maybe he fears that underneath that shiny exterior you would not find anything of worth at all.

⭐⭐⭐⭐☆ Better In Water? By: TheLittleMerman Summoned him near the coast for a naval dispute. Completely different guy from what you guys describe. He showed up in full uniform, commanded a legion of sea serpents, and sank the enemy fleet in 10 minutes. He didn’t stutter once. Unfortunately the second he stepped back on dry land, he tripped over his own tail and started crying because he thought I laughed at him. If you need him, catch him at the beach.

⭐☆☆☆☆ The Sacrifice Paradox is REAL By: GiveMeBackMyRuriChan Who the fuck manages this guy??? The sacrifice requirements demand a jealousy component. Fine, normal envy demon rules. Leviathan ONLY accepts components that make *him* jealous, then flips out fully manifested – antlers, lizard tail, crocodillian head, the whole shebang – and attacks you for making him jealous. I offered him an event-only, limited edition Ruri-chan figure (which he wanted desperately according to recent grimoire entries) and he tried to DROWN ME in summoned seawater because "No one told ME about that event!" Bro wtf do you WANT. I barely escaped and he kept the figure anyway. I reported this to the Office of Avatar Oversight but they said it was "within parameters." How???​

⭐☆☆☆☆ Barbatos Needs to Beat His Ass By: DataMagician_Actuary The king needs to do something about him I'm so serious. I checked the public avatar grimoire records and his rejection ratio is the worst out of all seven. When you actually read the rejected sacrifice entries, 75% of them are documented along the lines of: "Sacrifice met all stated criteria. Envy component was valid. Avatar destabilized prior to contract activation due to envy response triggered by summoner's original possession of the item." DO YOUR FUCKING JOB ASSHOLE! You can't demand envy-based offerings and then punish people for successfully making you envious! I’m taking this to the Office of Avatar Oversight!

💬 Reply from SeventhTimesACharm: ^Good luck lmao. Diavolo thinks the brothers are "charmingly eccentric." The system is working as intended (badly).

⭐⭐⭐☆☆ Competent But Insufferable By: VeteranPactHolder_Soren I've summoned demons across nine noble houses and Leviathan is by far the most difficult to deal with. Everybody knows about the BS sacrifice paradox, but also the constant nerd references are grating. He'll be mid-curse and suddenly derail into a 20-minute commentary on how my summoning circle "kind of looks like the array from [title I have never heard of and do not care about]." And when you try to change the subject? “LOL yeah I figured you hate me, why would anyone want a disgusting shut-in like me?" Get help.

⭐⭐☆☆☆  Manage Your Expectations By: CasualContractor His work is fine if you can pull off the sacrifice, which, uh. Good luck with that. His output swings wildly. Some days you get the Grand Admiral of Hell's Navy and it's staggering. Other days you get the guy who can't finish a sentence without apologizing for taking up space. Manage your expectations or don't bother.