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I'd rather be in outer space ๐ธ
we're not kids anymore.
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psychosis good ending

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love that im getting this as a recommendation

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I have 5 boyfriends and yes they all cut theirself
passion
ใใใฏ่ฒทใใใใใชใใฃใใ
"my Pseudo-Laptop-Bag", 2006. by Yochin.
Cover art illustrated by Satsuko Okamoto for Teen Look magazine, circa 1960s โ

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Debbie Harry and Chris Stein photographed by Roberta Bayley, 1976 โก
โ ๐๐ฎ๐๐ซ๐๐ฒ ๐๐๐ฉ๐๐ฎ๐ซ๐ง ๐๐ฒ ๐๐ข๐๐ก๐๐ซ๐ ๐๐ฏ๐๐๐จ๐ง (๐๐๐๐) โ
Sylvie Vartan, 1966.
its POISON!!! youve brought me an ELIXIR you DONKEY!!!!! i ask for a medium well wellington and you bring me a WITCHES BREW!!!!!!
How to Play as Jesus in DnD 5e
Someone asked me to build Jesus, and Iโm not one to turn down a request. I want to put it on record before I begin that I was raised Methodist myself, and while I identify as an atheist now, I have the utmost respect for any and all religions. I do not make this post to mock or belittle anyone elseโs beliefs, nor to insult the imagery or symbolism that Jesus represents. Although a lot of my gifs are on the sillier side, itโs because I like to use a variety of sources for figures like Jesus if I can help it. However, I have built Apollo and Morgan le Fey in the past, and plan to build other figures like Odin, Persephone, Lucifer, and Amaterasu in the future. As such, I want to make it clear that I am approaching each of these important cultural figures from a place of respect for other peopleโs closely held beliefs, and any insult or misrepresentation is not done intentionally. I try my best to do research and donโt make builds lightly. Just be aware that this is done all in good fun, and no disrespect is intended toward those who value these figures as important people, symbols, or personifications of ideologies. Keep in mind as well, that some of this is my personal interpretation, and I know not everyone is going to agree with the version of Jesus as I perceive him. Heโs a monumental figure with a lot of varying stories and sources, both antiquated and modern, and everyone is entitled to their own interpretation of him.
For his race, Jesus would most likely be a Protector Aasimar, as they are angelic beings, but are not completely divine, being partly human. Since Jesus is an accomplished public speaker, we can leave the Protector Aasimarโs racial bonus alone, granting Jesus +2 CHA/+1 WIS. This allows Jesus to speak Celestial, have a healing hand, and to sprout angelic wings 1 minute per long rest. However, if you wanted to play Jesus as a Variant Human or Custom Lineage, that would also be alright.
Jesus was a carpenter, so as tempting as an Acolyte background would be, the most accurate thing would be to make him a Guild Artisan, falling into group 5 which includes carpenters, roofers, and plasterers. He gains proficiency in Insight to know peopleโs true intentions such as those who will betray him, and Persuasion so that he can preach and convince large crowds of his rhetoric.
Jesus did believe in goodness, but he was killed for openly rebelling against Roman occupation in the holy land. He endorsed non-violent protest, but did so in the name of freedom from oppression. At the very least, the historical Jesus was an active rebel against tyranny and injustice, making him Chaotic Good in an unjust society, or Lawful Good in a fair and just society. Heโs more or less Neutral Good, and his philosophies of Law vs Chaos really depend on whose authority he is dealing with. Whether he agrees with or opposes those in power will dictate his philosophies on whether lawfulness or civil disobedience is the correct course of action.
CLERIC LIFE DOMAIN
If I had to classify the domains of the Christian God, I would likely say that He would most closely tie to Life, Light, Peace, and Knowledge. You may be wondering why Jesus isnโt a Divine Soul Sorcerer. They are literally beings with divine bloodlines. The simple answer is that while Jesus is a good public speaker that showcases a knack for Charisma skill checks, Iโve always thought of Jesus as more of a wise man than a charming one. Heโs good at convincing people because heโs wise enough to understand people on a deeper level, and that wisdom comes across in the way he speaks and carries himself. He may be persuasive, but those persuasive words carry a message of insightfulness, understanding, and logic, all of which stem from coming from a wise person. As such, I decided that Cleric was more appropriate than Sorcerer, as they prioritize understanding and religious devotion over charming smiles and winning personalities. Clerics also get access to Divine Intervention, and Jesus was still an active worshipper of God as a Jew, despite also being His son. I went with Life Domain because Jesusโ most famous miracles involve healing the sick and injured. The life domain not only makes Jesus a prolific healer, it also slots him into a more passive and supportive party role. However, if you want to play a more violent, vengeful, or demon-stomping version of Jesus that smites the wicked with holiness, then the Light domain packs a stronger punch and can decimate the armies of Lucifer better than the Life domain. Weโll take Medicine and Religion from the Cleric skill list.
BASIC BUILD INFORMATION
BUILD Life Domain Cleric (20)
STATS STR 12 DEX 10 CON 18 INT 10 WIS 20 CHA 16
SAVING THROWS STR +1 DEX 0 CON +4 INT 0 WIS +11 CHA +9
COMBAT INFO HP: 183 AC: 12 PP: 15 Init: +0 SAB: +11 SDC: 19
SKILLS Insight (+11) Medicine (+11) Persuasion (+9) Religion (+6)
LANGUAGES Common Celestial
JESUSโ SPELLS
Clerics can change their spell list on every long rest, but this line up of spells is designed to be the most accurate list to what Jesus is known to do. Keep in mind, I am not perfect and may miss something Jesus is known to do.
C Light, Mending, Sacred Flame, Spare the Dying, Thaumaturgy 1 Bless, Ceremony, Cure Wounds, Guiding Bolt, Purify Food and Drink, Sanctuary 2 Gentle Repose, Lesser Restoration, Prayer of Healing, Spiritual Weapon, Warding Bond, Zone of Truth 3 Aura of Vitality, Beacon of Hope, Feign Death, Mass Healing Word, Remove Curse, Revivify, Water Walk 4 Aura of Life, Death Ward, Guardian of Faith 5 Commune, Flame Strike, Greater Restoration, Hallow, Mass Cure Wounds, Raise Dead 6 Heal, Sunbeam 7 Divine Word, Resurrection 8 Holy Aura, Sunburst 9 True Resurrection
There werenโt really any major surprises with this build, itโs about what I expected going into it. But I hope we can be civil about the subject matter. I did this as a fun exercise, and with reverence for the figure being used. There may be some that are angry that Jesus isnโt all-powerful, but itโs a PC. Any figure built with the DnD character system will be weaker than their counterpart. God, Zeus, Satan, Cthulhu, The Grim Reaper, doesnโt matter. The level 20 cap is going to bring down their attributes to a more mortal level. Itโs just how the game is set up. But within the parameters of the game, this should give you a good idea of how to play as the Son of God. Just remember that this was done for fun, and is only meant to be a little guide or tutorial, and you donโt have to allow this build at your table if it makes you uncomfortable. And because this could upset people, ask your DM and table before trying this one out for yourself.

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