Destructive Indie Yard #5:
The Player/the Hero/Steve/Jesse (videogame composite) (will henceforth be referred to as the Player)
Minecraft (videogame composite)
Defender of the Overworld
In the world of building blocks, which of these avatars of creation have what it takes to build over the other’s odds of victory?
A few clarifications before we begin:
Given that these two player avatars can not only be anyone, but can also number in the dozens (or even hundreds if you’ve got insane reach), this will be limited to a 1v1 battle (before summons), where both sides are geared up in as much equipment as they can carry, with bases to carry additional material and their beds.
And given that both have been displayed as being able to come back from death, we will analyse this battle with that ability in mind, with any additional leeway granted through additional media (in other words, the Player’s revives will be treated as if they have Keep Inventory on thanks to not losing equipment in Dungeons and Legends).
Lastly, due to Legends inclusions having a reliance on a central base, the battle will be treated as if the Player’s base is at the Well of Fate, but will otherwise be treated as neutral terrain.
The Player will be limited to as they are presented within Minecraft media, without the higher being beyond (arguments as for why will be included in the Conclusion).
You can purchase Minecraft (Bedrock and Java editions) here!
You can purchase Minecraft Dungeons here!
You can purchase Minecraft Legends here!
You can purchase Terraria here!
(Minecraft: Story Mode cannot be purchased currently).
Bonus: DIY 2026 Vote (Part 2/2)
Thank you for those who have submitted! We have a total of 3 valid MU suggestions to poll on, and we have made the collective decision not to delay again, and instead add one suggestion of our own to the pool. You may vote on the MU you’d like to see here!
Minecraft: Bedrock Edition (current version as of 08/05/2026)
Minecraft: Java Edition (current version as of 08/05/2026)
Minecraft Dungeons (current version)
Minecraft Legends (current version)
Have you ever dreamed of a world made out of blocks, that stretches out forever?
This is the world of Minecraft, where there’s endless adventure to be had for anyone who ventures into such a land?
Who is it that dreamed of such an adventure? Well, they could be anyone, or even many people, so we’ll just call them the Player as a shorthand.
The player’s dreams start out humble, waking up in the middle of the wild, punching a tree down for its wood, and using that to craft their first pickaxe to mine with.
As they dug deeper, they’d find iron, and eventually diamonds, all to gear up with. Facing off against deadly foes like brutish zombies, eagle eyed skeletons, and teleporting Endermen. Sometimes coming out on top, and sometimes perishing.
But when has a dream ended with death? No matter how they died, who slain them, they’d always come back to life, with not a body to be found.
As they explored this new land, making friends with the local wolves to serve as back-up and grabbing new items to use as weapons, such as spears, tridents, and even fishing poles (for when you just want that mob to get over here), it became clear that… Uh…
When are they going to eat? Sleep?
Well, maybe it just looks more ridiculous than it really is. Afterall, the days are shorter in this land, and even then eventually they’ll get sleep deprived enough that phantoms start haunting them.
Phantoms that they then slay.
And while it’s impossible to quantify how long they can really go without food, keeping themselves full is important to keep their regeneration and stamina up. And it’s not that difficult to come across, especially with all of the villages that come along, and their inhabitants… Villagers.
Especially once they find ruined portals, the remnants of another tale long told, made out of looming blocks of obsidian but with missing gaps.
As they filled in the missing pieces of obsidian and used a bit of fire to bring the portal back to life, they took a step in, and… entered a new dimension.
Those villagers held a legend that inhabitants from the Nether used to invade.
In another dream, the Player was a part of that legend, summoned by entities called the Hosts to defend the Overworld from these invaders, the Piglins, who used a corrupted beacon to absorb energy from one of the two suns permanently, creating night.
> Power determined to be 136.066 Quettatons
They were given a Legendary Lute to call on the help of the Allays entrusted to them, the Flames of Creation to assemble their very own army of the very same mobs that torment them in other dreams - zombies, skeletons, creepers, so on; and the Banner of Courage helped them give direct commands to that army that accumulated.
And the Allays helped in mining up materials from the surrounding area, purifying the Nether infection, and constructing all manner of fantastic buildings, such as the aptly named Freeze Towers and Stun Towers, which inflicted debuffs against the invading armies - as a projectile and an aoe, respectively - not to mention a Protector Tower to help block projectiles from striking structures like them.
With these powerful tools at their discretion, they were able to drive back the Piglin army back into the Nether, even if it left some ill consequences on the Villagers who were around back then.
And if the main dream was anything to go by, it was no wonder they wanted to invade the Overworld - the land was sealed by a roof and a floor, lava flowed freely in all corners of the world, and it was so hot that water cannot exist, not even a whole cubic metre can last for a full second.
And yet, despite the dangers of this world, it had its own strengths mixed in. Materials embedded within the ground itself that can be combined with their diamond gear into Netherite, soul sand that slowed the user down and can grow special plants which allow for brewing special potions such as invisibility, fire resistance, and water breathing (well, for when they get out of the nether).
And creatures called Blazes, which when killed drop a special flaming powder that could be mixed in with the teleporting Ender Pearls the Endermen drop to create a special material…
And one of the most dangerous creatures in all of existence could be made within - the Wither, which indiscriminately attacked all living creatures and spread withered skeletons, using its namesake wither to kill anything in its way.
And yet it was no match for the Player, who slain it without a second thought and took the special core it had with them, back to the Overworld, and eventually learnt how to make a Beacon.
But they weren’t the only ones to get their hands on a beacon.
In another time, in another dream, the ill intent Villagers (or Illagers) gathered up to invade the Overworld, and take it all for themselves, led by the Arch-Illager and his Orb of Dominance. The Orb of Dominance is a powerful relic, able to corrupt beacons into devastating soul powered lasers of death.
The Player, whether alone or as part of a team of four, fought back against the invading army, gathering up weapons and artifacts like the aforementioned Corrupted Beacon (and similar soul powered weapons, so potent that they can destroy souls), the Love Medallion to mind control foes into protecting the user, the Shadow Veil to turn into an invisible shadow, and even cursed weapons like the Shrieking Crossbow said to make the user become one with the night or the Spooky Gourdian said to turn the user into the namesake terror of the Pumpkin Pastures. With the weapons able to gain potent enchantments such as Stunned, stunning the foe in place, or Gravity, to drag them in closer to their weapons’ effects.
And it is with these weapons and more (and I do mean a lot, lot more…) that the Player (and their team if applicable) was able to not only stop the Arch-Illager and the Orb of Dominance, but the creatures corrupted by the Orb of Dominance’s fragments, like the Wretched Wraith - a being able to abruptly freeze an island into sub-zero temperatures.
> Power determined to be 13.69 megatons
Of course, the adventure never truly ended, and even in the main dream where the player returned, they fought off invading armies of Illagers, swam down into the deepest depths to take down the Elder Guardian and get to the sunken loot within, and snuck their way through the Deep Dark (after dying to the Warden that gets summoned by blindly rushing through).
The character seems to be traveling a lot faster than you’d initially assume, given that they can be seen moving in comparison to the sound waves made in the Deep Dark; and with some items we’ve yet to talk about even moving faster than them.
> Speed measured to be approximately 6,431.25 m/s, possibly 10,838.8 m/s
But they weren’t exploring the world in earnest for no reason. With blaze rods and the teleporting ender pearls combined, they got the Eyes of Ender, which served as navigation to far off distant strongholds, with a mysterious portal hidden deep within. The same Eyes of Ender serving as keys to the portal.
A mystery portal leading to who knows where, the only options were to either think about the past, or to jump in.
In another, rather different dream, the Player was merely a normal Overworlder by the name of Jesse. Until he met Petra, who gave her a Nether Star which ultimately thrust him into adventure.
This adventure would lead him on a long quest to defeat many does, from the Wither Storm, a creature formed from a command block, and defeated it using a weapon forged from a similarly strong command block enchantment. To the Old Builders, experienced architects that built some of the greatest contraptions known to the worlds.
The strongest of such foes ultimately being Romeo, one of the Admins of this world (essentially a godlike entity who can do whatever he wants to the world) who resided in a dimension of his own making. In order to defeat him, Jesse was given Fred’s Gauntlet, an enchanted golden gauntlet with the power to progressively remove an Admin’s powers on contact. With this gauntlet in hand, Jesse was not only able to harm Romeo, but also block hits from him, with Romeo’s power being enough to passively sustain an entire alternate dimension with stars even after being weakened multiple times.
> Power determined to be 16.88 ExaFoe
But it could be even greater, as Romeo previously was able to cover the entire Overworld in a layer of bedrock, and planned to do so again. While sources on the size of a Minecraft world aren't consistent, there have been statements that it’s infinite in size (and in Story Mode the world is shown to possess the Farlands, implying the infinite world generation from Infdev), which - if true - would make his overall power infinite regardless of timeframe (given it’s his admin powers allowing him to place an infinite amount of matter down)
They would eventually defeat Romeo, and be responsible for choosing his ultimate fate from there.
In the main dream, the Player found themselves traversing to another dimension for one last time. Arriving at the End, a dimension full of nothing but Endermen, except for the Ender Dragon flying above all of them. This great battle over the void of emptiness was long and grueling (or, alternatively, you just used beds to slay it without any hassle…); but in the end the Player made their final triumph, and explored the End for their own needs.
Coming across potent tools such as the flight granting elytra, teleporting food in the chorus fruit, and all of the loot they could possibly want. And when they were ready to come home, they took the unhatched dragon egg with them and… Jumped into the portal to home.
And on the trip back… They heard the thoughts of something… unfathomable. Beings talking about many dreams they’ve been on, many dreams others have had, the many dreams that exist. All connected through one, longer dream.
A dream of a kind and loving universe, one that wished to see them thrive and grow, one that wished to grant them freedom and agency, even when it could lead to sadness or suffering.
And their dream, of a world that’s flat and endless, with a short sun, and the power to come back from death - it was just a part of this dream. The truth wasn’t for them.
The truth was for you. To remember that, no matter what, the universe loves you. It wants you to thrive, as a part of the universe. As a part of the greatest dream. The Player only exists as an extension of you.
You are a part of the universe, a universe made of love. You are love.
They arrived in the Overworld, triumphant. They were now free to continue beyond the End itself, free to do whatever they wished in this endless world.
And it looks like they’re headed to the Deep Dark now, perhaps to fight the Warden.
Terraria (current version as of 08/05/2026)
Terraria 8th Anniversary Lore Event
Welcome to the world of Terraria, a land full of mystery and wonder.
The ancient legends from the Order of the Guide recall the great battle that the ancient Cthulhu had with an ancient race of Dryads over the fight of the world, a battle where the Dryads gave their lives to save their world from Cthulhu, who was forced to flee to the dark side of the moon.
But it also foretells of Cthulhu’s great return one day, to finish what he started once he has healed. The arrival of a great hero/ine (with or without some friends along for the ride) was all that stood between him and annihilation. The Terrarian.
Who knows why they were chosen? Did the Guide see a quality in them that others did not? Was they renowned in their corner of the world before the Guide brought them over? Did the Guide know that they could come back from death endlessly (wait, that sounds familiar…)?
Whatever the reason was, it was clear some ordinary Terrarian did not stand a chance against the almighty Cthulhu as they were now, they needed to get stronger. And it’s not like Cthulhu’s missing body parts just withered away into dust. And Cthulhu’s remnant body parts aren’t the only threats to the world…
Every so often, an army of slimes rains down upon the world, led by an extra large King Slime.
The Eye of Cthulhu wandered through the night sky, searching for plucky young adventurers to slay.
The Goblin Army, a bloodthirsty army of goblins who left one of their own behind…
Cthulhu’s spine, the Eater of Worlds dug around the earth, having become one with the Corruption, the physical manifestation of all sin that spreads for the sole purpose of spreading misery.
The Brain of Cthulhu had allied with the crimson ,a singular fleshy organism that spreads further and infects all who reside within it, adding those it infects to itself.
The Old One’s Army, a mighty army from another world (hi Dungeon Defenders) that seeks to free their imprisoned namesake, and whose arrival inflicts the devastating Creative Shock, preventing further mining.
Deep in the Jungle, the mighty Queen Bee fervently defends any who intrude upon her hives.
Deerclops, another visitor from another world (hi Don’t Starve), who the Terrarian can fight non-stop for over one full day.
Cthulhu’s skull, Skeletron, resided within the mysterious Dungeon, a once vibrant city that was reduced to only the bones of its residents by Skeletron’s curse.
And, most importantly, the Torch God, enraged by their sloppy placement of torches.
But as the Terrarian explored their world and gathered the weapons needed to face these mighty foes, more and more people spread into their world, selling all sorts of wares.
The Guide was an expert at most knowledge of the world (and at letting zombies in at night).
The Demolitionist sold potent dynamite to tear apart this world (which can be crafted into the Explosives, a potent explosion).
The Golfer, who… uh, really likes golf. And he came with his sister, the Zoologist, who got bit by a cursed wolf.
The Tavernkeep, a man from another universe who sold weapons from his own world to help defend against the Old One’s Army. One such weapon is the Lightning Aura sentry, which pierces through your armour to hit you directly.
The Goblin Tinkerer, who steals all my money while I try to get Legendary on my damn sword! Come on, man!
The Mechanic who sold the means to set up complicated traps and gizmos culminating in the Grand Design (the ultimate in wiring placing, cutting, and seeing), and who really likes the Tinkerer for… some strange reason.
The Party Girl, who came all the way from Sweden to have a sick party!!!
The Angler, who treats me like some kind of slave :(
The Dryad, who is the last of her kind, helped the Terrarian with regaining balance over the world by fighting off the corruption and crimson. She should be careful to-
Isis the Dryad was slain…
Oh, uh, there goes the Dryad… Oops.
Must’ve been the explosives left lying around. Though the Terrarian can survive even the nastiest ones without any armour, although it is a close call.
> Calculated at 17.009619980879734 tons
As the Terrarian gathers power and slays these mighty threats to the world, he gained a sizeable number of neat little trinkets, like Terraspark Boots and Dunerider Boots to run fast like the wind, like a scrying orb to spy on others, a Shellphone to teleport all across their world at will and give them a live update on a wide variety of information like positioning, the Grand Design to handle all of their wiring in one convenient item, an absolutely heavy Encumbering Stone - so heavy that just one of them keeps them from adding to their rather sizeable inventory - and quite a humble supply of potions.
> Weight measured to be 769,338,951.9411266 kilograms
Wrath, Rage, and Magic Power potions to further boost their power, Ironskin, Endurance, and Lifeforce potions to boost their survivability, Hunter, Spelunker, and Dangersense potions to boost their awareness, and even potions like Obsidian Skin, Water Breath, and Swift Swim, so that they can navigate through any liquid without issue.
Well… Any liquid but the Shimmer.
The Shimmer is just weird.
The surface tension sends projectiles bouncing off of it, dropping items down into it turns them back into their base components, and getting it over others can change them into new forms - like the Mechanic turning into a goblin like her darling Tinkerer, the young Angler turning into the mythical Kappa, and the Golfer turning into a foxman like his sister. Even cute little bunnies would forever be transformed into faelings, harmlessly floating around the Shimmer.
And even if it doesn’t transform you, it will still mess with you, like how so many enemies are turned invisible, and how the Terrarian’s body is reduced down to insubstantialism, helplessly phasing through blocks until they reach open air.
As they sought more power, the Guide sent them on the most dangerous mission yet - to challenge the Guardian of the world deep in the Underworld, the one who keeps the Corruption and the Crimson in place - powerful and evil blocks that spread and corrupt the very land and all who live within them. And… something else?
The unfathomably gigantic Wall of Flesh. The unfathomably horrific being that’s best described as a… wall of flesh. Yet even while utterly terrified, the Terrarian kept their wits together and managed to slay this utter beast of a monster.
And in doing so unleashed the Hallow, a land of utter purity brought to the absolute extreme. Not to mention unleashing the full might of the Corruption and Crimson. Now so powerful that deep underground they converted the very souls of the visitors into the essence of purity or the essence of darkness.
But the Terrarian, pursuing evermore power, took those purified souls for themself and was hard at work in getting stronger.
Power Bombs, to wipe away the new magical ores that spread.
The Ankh Shield, to protect them from knockback and a whole slew of nasty debuffs like being frozen and turned to stone.
Weapons from the Pirate Invasion turned against them as a former pirate captain joined their side.
Tearing apart Mechanical simulacrums of Cthulhu’s body parts, including the Destroyer who’s digging deep underground was potent enough to shake the entire planet.
> Calculated at 33.7058734945178 gigatons
Tearing the mighty Plantera, reducing the ultimate guardian of the jungle into plantkill.
Stockpiling on explosive rockets from the Cyborg.
Penetrating the impenetrable lihzahrd temple (yes, lihzahrd, that’s just how they spell it) and destroying their mighty Golem before taking the bricks for their own.
Taking down the Empress of Light and taking her Soaring Insignia for their own, to allow them to fly forever.
Summoning Martians down all the way from Mars, who flew to Earth in, at most, one second, stealing the cosmic car key to one of their UFOs and claiming it for their own.
> Calculated at 56,000,000,000 m/s
Tania the Dryad has arrived!
The Terrarian was almost powerful enough to avenge the Dryads and to well and truly save the world from the one responsible for dooming it in the first place.
But there was one more obstacle between them and Cthulhu, now named the Moon Lord.
The very cultists who schemed to bring Moon Lord back. Who kidnapped the Mechanic and forced her to build their mechanical simulacrums. Who were now attempting to summon him directly to this world.
The Terrarian took them down and prepared to fight the Moon Lord. But instead of facing off against the Moon Lord, they found four celestial pillars descending, each bringing with it an alien army invading the planet.
One final chance to grow stronger.
Even the most humble of these items, the Lunar Hook, was said to be able to drag the moon down to Terraria.
> Calculated at 133.4 ronnatons
But that’s likely just a small peek at their true power, given the fragments of the Nebula Pillar are said to contain the power of a galaxy.
> Calculated at 13.50049 gigafoe
And the Solar Pillar, infused with the power of Solar Flares, is said to contain the fury of the universe, possibly referring to solar flares (though if this is a serious description of power or not is yet to be determined).
> Calculated at 1.000e+31 QuettaexaFoe
Finally, with such mighty weapons as the Stardust Dragon, the Nebula Blaze, the Phantasm, and the Solar Eruption, the Terrarian was ready to face off against impending doom.
The Moon Lord’s arrival marked the arrival of the void, and - if not stopped - would truly mark the end for Terraria. The two battled furiously, neither willing to back down until only one was left standing.
And, in the end… The Terrarian came out on top. And with it came the treasures of Moon Lord’s death. Luminite to craft into armour denoting their triumph. The Celestial Starboard, to fly through the air as they wished. Almighty weapons such as the Lunar Portal Staff, the Celebration Mk2, and the Last Prism. And the ultimate weapon of all… The Zenith.
Not to mention some fun goodies like the Portal Gun, which can teleport from one corner of their island to the other, the Rod of Harmony, to spam close range teleports to their heart’s content, the Terraformer, to change the land around them to whichever biome they wished, and the Endless Shimmer Bucket, to spread that wacky liquid wherever they want.
Their war against the Moon Lord was now over. They stand at the peak, mightier than anything the world could send their way. But that didn’t mean the journey was over. After all, there’s biomes of evil and purity to clean up, more adventures to be had, and - should a new threat ever loom against the world again, they will be here to defend against it.
Belle the Princess has left!
Jeff the Guide was slain…
Tania the Dryad was slain…
Oh, and it looks like they’re fighting the Empress of Light again, probably after the Terraprisma. Let’s see where this new leg of their adventure takes them.
With our fighters prepped and ready, it’s time to start the Destruction!
(For the sake of convenience, the Player will be referred to by the name Steve, and the Terrarian will be referred to by the name Vale)
Thud. Plop. Plop. Plop. Plop. Plop.
A magnificent medieval castle loomed over the land, the newest masterpiece of a lone builder over the course of a week. Steve was now just working on the last part of their build, one of the castle’s tower exteriors. With each jump a new block was placed, in a calming rhythm.
They’re hoping to finish before the rain starts, judging by the sea of clouds that currently dotted the sky.
But as Steve ascends, they find something blocking their path. Looking up and around, they find a long, thin beam of wood above their head, leading over to a replica pirate ship, the bowsprit jutting straight through where their final tower stood. This wasn’t here when they started their work.
Well the bowsprit didn’t need to be full length. They mined the blocks in their way before they continued to build upwards.
Jump and place, jump and place, jump and-
The block they placed beneath their feet vanished before they could jump, taking a small fall… Back onto the bowsprit they just mined up.
Someone else was here, cutting out the tower and putting their wooden blocks back in, a hammer to shape them into a thin beam. Vale had seen the castle when they began work, but there were no connecting towers at the time, nor a floorplan that indicated as such.
As such the both of them had assumed this spot was safe to build in, and now their builds overlapped.
Steve mined out the end of the bowsprit once more, turning to Vale.
Vale placed the blocks back on the bowsprit, but before they could even start hammering Steve mined them away.
And, for good measure, placed a TNT on the front of the ship. Unlit, but the warning was clear regardless.
Vale locked eyes with Steve, before their appearance was replaced by a full set of otherworldly green Vortex armour.
Steve responded by equipping their brownish black infernal looking Netherite Armour (grayish pair of Elytra in the place of the chest piece), a magical purple hue encasing each part of the set.
Vale placed the wooden beam back, and was met with the TNT being lit.
Vale backed away from the lit explosive, watching as part of their build blew up.
They pulled out a purple rocket launcher, the Celebration Mk2, and took aim at the castle.
Seeing their build in danger, Steve pulled out a bow with a rocket in the place of an arrow. They took aim, firing it directly at Vale’s centre of mass.
But before it could hit, Vale jumped up and a glowing yellow star appeared beneath their feet, the Celestial Starboard lifting them out of the arrow’s trajectory before abruptly hovering in place. Vale then began firing out, rockets flying towards the castle in swarms, blasting apart a massive hole in it.
Steve lit up another rocket, using its flight to lift them upwards towards Vale, their wings spreading out as they began flying. In their spare hand, they pulled out a Netherite Sword, glowing with the same magic as their armour.
Vale backed away from Steve, aiming their rocket launcher at the new challenger, the barrage of rockets blasting into Steve repeatedly, until they crashed into the ground. When the smoke cleared from the destroyed debris, there was no body.
> Steve went off with a bang due to a firework fired from Celebration Mk2 by Vale
… But death was but a mild inconvenience. Steve climbed out of their bed, which was only a short distance away from where they died. They opened up the nearest chest, rummaging through it until they pulled out a large blue banner. The banner of courage.
A mob army is approaching from the west!
Vale was back to work on their build, the bowsprit back in place as they returned to the finishing touches. That’s when they heard it, a faint rumbling in the ground. They walked over to the edge of their airborne pirate ship, looking at the small army that was now approaching.
A swarm of green four legged Creepers, fleshless Skeletons wearing helmets, green skinned Zombies wearing straw hats, and a variety of different Golems of all sorts all came marching in, with Steve in the front of the army atop a horse, waving their banner of courage in the air.
Vale jumped off of their pirate ship, celestial starboard keeping them airborne as they pulled out a new weapon - a miniature dolphin with a metal casing around the chest area, the Space Dolphin Machine Gun (S.D.M.G. for short).
As they fired down upon the army, green bullets made out of Chlorophyte leaving the S.D.M.G.’s mouth, they swerved in midair, all homing in on the closest living target, shredding many of the hapless mobs to nothing.
But skeletons and wooden plank golems weren’t so helpless, as they fired out from below with their arrows alongside Steve, striking Vale’s armour and knocking them back from the air. While they continued to fire out at the crowd below even as they were knocked around, each hit knocked them down closer and closer to the ground, until…
They turned around to see a swarm of Creepers, their bullets curving to hit them before they even knew they were surrounded. Yet it wasn’t enough, one of the Creepers lasting long enough to explode right on top of Vale.
Their body was torn to pieces from the explosion, their pirate ship ripped apart from the force in kind. Vale was dead, quickly overwhelmed by the army.
Vale was smote by Creeper.
… But death was a mild inconvenience. After waiting to come back to life, Vale climbed out of their bed, which was only a short distance away from where they died. They opened up the nearest chest, rummaging through it until they found a glowing rainbow sword. The Terraprisma.
Steve pulled out an unassuming lute, the Legendary Lute, and a swarm of golden wispy creatures, the Allays, began floating around Steve. They played a small tune on the lute, and the Allays flew over to the ruined castle, beginning to repair it. With another small turn, a swarm of blue Allays began digging into the surrounding earth for raw materials.
Then Vale returned, flying in on their Celestial Starboard, but this time they were clad in a shiny cyan and gold set of armour, with a cyan and gold spectral upper body floating behind them, the Stardust Armour with its Stardust Guardian. Alongside them were a dozen floating swords, the Terraprismas.
Steve’s mobs began charging again, Vale landing on the ground without a second thought. They ignored the mobs, instead holding up a pale brown staff with a green substance resembling glass encasing one end of the staff, the Lunar Portal Staff.
The mobs that charged in quickly found themselves sliced apart, vanishing in a puff of smoke as the Terraprismas defended their summoner without a command. The skeletons and plank golems prepared their arrows again, only to be wiped away by green portals firing from a vortex floating in the air.
Steve backs up to their ruined castle, placing blocks above their head to protect them from the barrage of the lunar portal staff, crossbow held in the other hand. They fire out rockets one at a time, each pre-loaded with a different crossbow.
Vale charges in closer and closer, the mobs scattering and running about as they try to get a clear angle to attack Vale despite the barrage of hostile attacks. One such mob, the First of Brick, managed to do so, it and its fellow mobs outright unaffected by the sweeping lasers of the Lunar Portals.
It wound up for a close range hit, only for Vale to intercept it with the Possession. Immediately. The Terraprismas instantly dropped their previous targets, all focused on slicing up the First of Brick at once, cutting it away into nothing.
And yet the focus fire gave Steve a brief window, charging in on their horse as they held up a golden medallion with a heart on the front.
Three of the Terraprismas began emitting hearts from their cores, and those three Terraprismas turned in place and began slicing into Vale just like they sliced into their mobs moments ago.
A very confused Vale unsummoned their Terraprismas in a moment, but the damage was already done and Vale sliced them apart with their sword.
Vale let their arms get torn off by Vale’s Terraprisma.
Steve had won this time, but it was all too likely that Vale would be back for a fight again, and their army had been cut down quite a bit. As such they held up their Banner of Courage yet again, calling the small number of mobs not yet killed to them before leading them back to their base, with their horse galloping along.
But what they didn’t realise was that they were being watched, a ghostly Vale haunting them while Vale waited to be brought back to life.
Steve returned to their base, situated at the Well of Fates, all sorts of buildings spread out across the base, with a few towers situated at each corner to guard them. At the back was a Nether Portal, constructed prior with the clearance of the Hosts now that the invasion is over, and it’s heavily guarded on both ends just in case.
Now in relative safety, Steve shifted focus to summoning a fresh wave of mobs to help in the next conflict.
Only for Vale to arrive at the outskirts, this time clad in a set of dark purple robes with their eyes and a piece of the hood glowing a brighter purple, the Nebula Armour. In one hand they held up a green book, each side containing a brown cover with a green gem-like circle in the middle, the Lunar Flare. They opened up their book, and immediately the namesake lunar flares began raining down from the skies above, shooting down the hapless mobs from above while their numbers were already thinned.
A mob army has been defeated!
The nearest tower, a massive grey tower with light blue on each side, and four holes on the top (one each side) that’s been frosted over, the Frost Tower, fired at Vale. It missed the first shot, but the second shot struck true, freezing the Terrarian in place.
Until Vale abruptly broke out, now wearing a red and white pair of mittens in their hands, the Hand Warmer. Vale ignored the Frost Tower, its shots no longer able to freeze them in place.
With only one target left to focus on, they pulled out a new weapon, a silver gauntlet with light purple fingers and a purple emblem on the back of the glove, its energy giving Vale’s entire hand a purple glow. The Nebula Blaze.
As they fired out power from Orion’s belt, the clumps of energy swerved and curved in mid-air, homing in on Steve’s position. Steve leapt off their horse, who was not lucky enough to avoid the first shot, then dodge rolled across the ground to avoid the second one.
They pulled out the Bubble Burster, firing out a few shots at Vale before rolling out of the way of the third shot, only for the fourth and fifth to hit them, knocking them back against another tower, this one a large gray building with an oversized golden bell hanging in the middle of it.
Vale was ready to throw out another shot. But just before they could let the magic energy escape their hand, the giant bell tolled, and in an instant they lost control over their limbs as a pleasant yet overbearingly loud tone rang through the air.
Steve was ready for the stun, pulling out their fishing hook and tossing it directly at Vale, hooking up to them. They immediately began running, aiming straight for the Nether Portal near the edge of the base, a large structure of black obsidian outlining the edge, with a purple energy swirling in the middle.
But Vale recovered from the stunning noise before Steve could reach it, shooting one hook behind themself, aimed for the tower. They missed by a margin.
As they were about to throw out another hook, the stun tower rang out again, disrupting them as their prepared hook randomly fired straight up, towards the moon.
And that gave Steve the time they needed, running up the stairs into the isolated Nether Portal, about to run straight in.
In just that moment, Vale’s grappling hook connected with the moon.
Vale flew upwards at inhuman speeds, and Steve’s fishing rod forced them to fly up in kind, the two rapidly ascending into space.
Vale became an astronaut.
Steve experienced the dark side of the moon
As Steve comes back to life, the most important detail to them was that Vale had gone straight to their base, which means they’ll be back any moment now. They need to be ready for the attack, and as such they dig through their chest for another item, one that will let them get the drop on Vale. A golden medallion with an image of a purple eye on one side, the Shadow Shifter.
As Vale comes back to life, the most important detail to them was that whatever Steve’s tower did, their Ankh Shield failed to protect them from it, so now they need to take it out immediately. As such they dig through their potion chest, grabbing out the essentials to use.
As Vale arrived at the base, their invisibility potion leaving them, well, invisible, they see no sign of Steve. Out searching for them, maybe?
They approach the Stun Tower that gave them trouble before, and begin firing out with the Celebration Mk. II - the attack leaving them visible in their Vortex Armour.
The tower triggers in response, its beautiful melody stunning them once again, but this would be the last time as the rockets blast apart the Stun Tower, the giant bell falling down to the ground and breaking into various gold blocks.
The moment they stopped attacking was the moment their invisibility returned, but that doesn’t matter to Steve, who is also invisible. They swing their fishing rod again, staying invisible as the hook latches onto Vale once more.
Still invisible, they drag Vale up towards them, taking a stab as Vale gets in close, their invisibility ending as they strike with a dark purple weapon featuring a light purple blade and white edge, the Swift Striker.
Their sneak attack successful, Vale switches weapons to a twin pair of swords, partially hollow purple blades but with golden edges and handles, a pair called The Beginning And The End.
Vale suddenly appears as they attack, now clad in a glowing orange set of armour, the Solar Flare Armour, and a pink bladed handle with a hilt resembling a cat in one hand, the Meowmere. Their swing connects with one of Steve’s swords, partially disarming them as a cat head flies off in the distance, meowing every time it bounces off of something.
They’re stronger, and they’re the only one who still has invisibility, but they expose themselves every time they attack and Steve has two blades to work with instead of one.
Slice, Vale catches Steve in an overhead swing.
Stab, Steve punishes the attack with a stab to the side, Vale’s invisibility vanishing.
Vale summons a grey and blue flying saucer with red lights via the Cosmic Car Key, flying away from Steve while they frantically swing the Meowmere from range, letting the bouncing cat heads hurt Steve.
Steve gets knocked back by one of them, and - in a panic - uses the Shadow Shifter again, vanishing from sight.
Vale swings out a flying piggy bank with wings - the Money Trough - and quickly opens it up for something in particular. They didn’t expect to need it, so it’s a good thing they left it here from their last farming trip - the Hunter Potion.
The moment Vale drinks it, they can see Steve standing nearby, thanks to a red glow around their person. From the looks of it Vale is holding up some kind of cube.
Whatever it is, it’s probably going to be an attack from range. In an instant Vale switches back to the Nebula Armour in a puff of smoke, and holds up a large white prism, its edges glowing in a shifting rainbow pattern. The Last Prism.
It starts shooting a spread of rainbow coloured beams of light, slowly focusing into a single point. As it was condensing into one beam, Steve’s weapon fired out, a black beam with white light at its edges fires out, intercepting Vale’s beam and putting their two beams up against each other.
As if responding to their sheer force, the thick clouds finally start releasing rain down upon the overworld, soaking both of them as they focus on their clash.
Steve’s invisibility wears off again, the cube they were holding revealed to be a purple glass cube with a second square inside of it, a mixture of blue and purple. The Corrupted Beacon.
Neither can fire forever, the Last Prism requiring a rather hefty supply of mana potions to keep firing, while the Corrupted Beacon feeds off of a stockpile of stolen souls, but both are determined to be the longer firing combatant.
At first Vale’s beam is winning, its sheer power managing to overwhelm Steve’s, and force itself closer and closer to Steve. Just as it looks like it’s going to win outright…
It starts weakening. Already, Vale needs to burn through their potions, they focus growing hazy as mana sickness starts feeding through their head.
The Corrupted Beacon gains the upper hand, starting to power back through the ever weakening Last Prism, winning the beam clash at ever increasing speeds.
But just as its about to strike Vale, their supply of souls runs dry.
In an instant the rainbow destruction beam envelops Steve, burning away at them…
Steve was killed by Vale using magic
Vale immediately puts away their Last Prism and holds up a small shiny purple orb with a blue ring inside of it. Staring into the Scrying Orb, they wait for the moment they can see someone besides themself…
There they are. Steve, waking up and opening up another chest, rummaging and rummaging, until they find the greatest weapon of all.
A golden gauntlet, able to defeat even the mighty admins of the world, fitting nicely into one hand. In the other they hold out a green spherical gem, an Ender Pearl.
As Steve charges out of their house, rushing past the Nether Portal to where they just died, only to see that Vale is already well and truly gone.
They search, and search and search and search, but they can’t find Vale. Just as they’re about to give up and assume they fled, the Nether Portal is sliced in half, obsidian falling to the floor as the portal vanishes in an instant. Were they trying to jump Steve as they left their base?
Vale is behind the remains of the portal, decked out in Solar Armour once again as the weapon responsible for the destruction, a large purple blade with a thick blue crest and dark handle, the Zenith.
Steve immediately throws out the Ender Pearl up into the sky, before charging at Vale.
Vale holds out one hand, and the Zenith splits into a dizzying array of different swords, each flying out to strike Steve one by one before returning in a circular loop.
Steve blocks with the Gauntlet, one by one, keeping the barrage off of them. But it forcibly stops their advance, keeping them pinned in place as they do all they can to keep up with the barrage.
But their focus isn’t on Vale, it’s on the Ender Pearl. Soaring through the air, completely forgotten by Vale once it was clear it wasn’t going to hit them.
Steve puts a firework in their empty hand, their chestpiece replaced by their Elytra once again. As it’s about to collide with the ground, they hold the firework upwards.
The Ender Pearl breaks, and where it broke Steve now stands. They immediately fire off the rocket, flying up to Vale from behind, swinging their gauntlet forwards to hit.
Vale was only confused for a moment of a second, but that moment was all it took as they were struck with the overwhelming might of the gauntlet, and taken out in a single hit.
Vale’s soul was extractinated by Steve’s De-Admin Gauntlet
As Vale returns to life they find themselves… weaker than they did before. They aren’t sure how, but that punch left a lasting impact after their death. They look through their drawers once again, for something in particular.
Ah, here it is, leftover jungle juice. They toss it onto the floor before holding out a golden bucket filled with a pink liquid, the Endless Shimmer Bucket, and pour a small puddle over the potion.
They’ll need to be careful, they don’t have anymore Life Fruit for this.
As they fly back to Steve’s base, they’re intercepted along the way, Steve now flying through the air at absurd speeds with a trident in one hand. Each stab of the trident sends them wildly swinging in a new direction, going all around Vale.
Vale brings their Zenith back out, swinging the mess of swords frantically in an attempt to hit Steve.
Steve ducks underneath, above, even through the hoop of swords before it can close in around them, swinging in for another hit with the gauntlet.
This time Vale’s ready for it, holding up a rod with a pink orb at the end and golden embellishments just underneath, the Rod of Harmony. And just from waving it around, they’re in a different spot.
And so the battle goes on in the sky, one moving too fast for the naked eye to see, the other outright teleporting away. Everytime Steve gets close they go for a strike with their gauntlet, and everytime Vale is far they start swinging their Zenith.
The fight is at a standstill, neither side truly able to hit each other. Even once Steve starts mixing in throws with their Ender Pearl, Vale’s able to teleport out of the way before they’re struck down again.
It’s only once the battle starts going down to the forest below does it come to an end, as one well timed Ender Pearl throw gets Steve to teleport to the side of a tree Vale teleported to rather than the ground allowing them to get another strike in.
Vale got rubbed out by Steve’s De-Admin Gauntlet
Next time Vale reaches Steve, they’re now clad in a shield alongside their gauntlet. Vale’s Zenith strikes Steve at a constant cycle, but the addition of a second means of blocking, even if the shield was clearly inferior and getting worn away, allows Steve to walk on closer and closer.
Vale swings their Zenith in melee range, only for it to get blocked by the Gauntlet once again.
Vale keeps pushing the Zenith down onto Steve, even as their Gauntlet starts pushing back.
But in the end, the Gauntlet is more powerful, snapping the Zenith apart and sending Vale flying back.
Steve takes the opportunity, sprinting right towards Vale with the gauntlet in hand, ready for the killing blow.
Vale pulls out another weapon, an unassuming green yoyo, the Terrarian. A yoyo, mind you, that begins rapidly shooting out green bursts of energy. It swings around Steve, forcing them to block a strike from behind.
To which Vale unleashes their final weapon, an even more unassuming copper shortsword with a supernatural white glow. The True Copper Shortsword.
The barrage of swords - just like the Zenith in every way except they were all copper shortswords - strikes into Steve as their back is turned, slicing and dicing into them with no mercy.
Steve was slain by Vale using True Copper Shortsword
Steve’s not bothered by the kill, they’re clearly wearing Vale down, they just need to keep-
Why are they sinking into the floor? What is this pink liquid?
They continue sinking through the ground, through the bedrock, into the open void underneath the World.
In their utter shock and confusion, they fall into the abyss.
Steve fell out of the world
The next time they come back they’re already sinking again. So Vale sabotaged their home, did they? But what is this…? They’re still completely helpless, but as they sink through the bedrock they’re able to recover, firing out a firework to start flying underneath the world. They try making a small crevice to stay alive in, but their luck betrays them and they lose their speed, falling once again.
Steve fell out of the world
As Steve continues to spawn within this Shimmer trap, Vale takes a seat just outside of their home, looking in through the glass window. Maybe this’ll teach them not to mess with their cool pirate ship build.
Steve fell out of the world
How long until they free Steve from this loop? Hm… When they get bored of watching it, yes. And given they’re now going to have to craft a THIRD Zenith… They might take a while to get bored…
Both of these masters of weaponry possessed the ability to come back from the dead, making conventional means of killing them completely null and void - and as such, the debate warps from a traditional slug fest to a puzzle over if one can even stop the other from coming back, or otherwise incapacitate them in a way that wouldn’t count as them dying.
As such, let’s focus our points around the means the two have of achieving exactly that.
Starting with win-cons both of them theoretically possess, going to the Terrarian’s exclusive win-cons, and ending with the Player’s exclusive win-cons:
On paper the Player should be more than capable enough to do this, given that in order to even fight Phantoms in the first place they need to spend two whole days and nights without sleeping, and - while they still need food - the rate at which they need it is impossible to conclusively verify (unlike the Terrarian, whose need for food is displayed in the Constant seed).
However, while they can spend 3 whole Minecraft days without sleep, the length of a Minecraft day is confirmed to be shorter than that of a typical day. In the absolute worst case scenario, a day is as short as they are in-game, at around 20 minutes, which would drop that impressive 3 day period down to an underwhelming 1 hour. While it’s not unreasonable to assume they’re longer than that, especially with other games in the mix, it should still be shorter than a full 24 hours - the length of time the Terrarian was able to fight Deerclops for.
Even if we assume their absolute limits are completely tied with each other, the Terrarian’s summons passively attacking for them should allow them to not only exert less energy while fighting, but also allow them to straight up sleep mid-battle.
Even against a whole army like what the Player can conjure up and command into battle (but not remotely, they need to be in the thick of it to provide commands), summons like Enchanted Blades or Lunar Portals would be more than fast enough and strong enough to keep the Terrarian safe.
Either: sabotaging the other’s spawn point
Since both of their resurrections are tied to specific locations, in theory trapping that spawn location or even taking it out entirely should take them both back to their default spawn points, putting them too far away from the battlefield to reasonably continue the fight - after all, DIY VS rules grants a win if they’re kept out of the fight for a full hour. But can they pull such a feat off?
As far as finding each other’s spawn, the Player’s only real changes are to track the Terrarian through the fight until they’re led to the Terrarian’s spawn, or to find it through pure dumb luck - conversely, the Terrarian can spy on the Player at all times either via the scrying orb or via haunting them while waiting to respawn, giving them not only the exact location, but an exact route to take to reach the Player’s spawn.
Of course, once one reaches the other’s spawn, trapping them outright is still a rather difficult process. Both of them have the means of teleportation (the Player the random Chorus Fruit or a small hole to throw an Ender Pearl; while the Terrarian has the Rod of Harmony to teleport freely), and they both have the means to breathe underwater and become immune to lava outright, making infinite death pits non-viable… Except for Shimmer. But that can be saved for the Shimmer section (because yes, the Shimmer does indeed get its own segment). The Player at least gets to take advantage of the Terrarian’s 10 minute or longer respawn to get a leg up on trapping the other’s spawn, but even this isn’t enough to truly shut the other down.
As for destroying the other’s spawn, the Terrarian has a massive leg up despite the long respawn time, as not only do they have multiple means of efficiently mining through terrain (Power Bombs, Rocket Launchers, the Drill Containment Unit, and classic Pickaxes and Drills), but they can both mine and explode materials far more durable than anything the Player could feasibly have access too.
In contrast, nothing the Player has would be able to break through lihzahrd brick, allowing the Terrarian to encase their spawn in a thick enough layer to prevent tampering. And even if the Player were to somehow break the Terrarian’s spawn, the Terrarian can still get back to the fight anyways - their compass will keep them informed of where the battlefield is in relation to their position, and their UFO flies at a speed of almost 200 times the speed of light via its trip from Mars to Terraria, so fast that they’ll get to the arena with time to spare. And even if they didn’t, having even one portal placed from the portal gun would allow them to just shoot the other portal nearby and immediately return from the fight.
Lastly, the Terrarian can completely shut down the Player’s attempts at mining via activating the Old One’s Army, giving them both Creative Shock.
The Terrarian: Stealing the Player’s soul
Shouldn’t… Shouldn’t this be the Player’s win-con? After all, Minecraft Dungeons shows that the Player can steal all of their enemies’ souls, and even have a variety of weapons powered by those very same souls.
The Terrarian’s able to come back to life from their soul being extractinated from their body, Eater of Souls and Wraiths have both been independently said to be able to kill people and turn them into more Wraiths (in other words, soul transmutation), and both Nailhead and the Headless Horseman have bestiary entries saying that they can take souls from others (though in their cases it’s likely a metaphor for killing).
Meanwhile the Player doesn’t show the ability to come back to life from the same being done to it (and no resistance to it either), and if the Terrarian can take the fight deep enough underground, then they can use the Terraformer to convert the environment to Hallow, thereby purifying the Player’s soul enough for the Terrarian to just steal it after slaying the Player.
And they certainly can slay the Player, the Player scales to the Wretched Wraith creating a storm that covered an entire island, something the Terrarian easily outscales just from weapons that are long outclassed, as the Destroyer’s vibrations can be felt entirely around the world, yet alone their current weapons being comparable to their hook, which can drag down the moon.
> The Player lowball vs the Terrarian superlowball: 13.69 megatons vs 33.71 gigatons = 2,462x strength advantage for the Terrarian
> The Player lowball vs the Terrarian lowball: 13.69 megatons vs 133.40 ronnatons = 9,744,338,933,530,000,000x strength advantage for the Terrarian
Even if you argue that the Player’s Corrupted Beacon is as strong as the Corrupted Beacon used in Minecraft Legends with the only difference being duration (questionable due to both Legends being an in-universe legend making direct scaling arguable, but also the Legends version being powered by the Nether itself while the Dungeons version uses souls as a far meeker power source), the Terrarian’s has higher arguments for their power that would still allow them to outclass the Player, such as the nebula fragments individually having the power of an entire galaxy stored inside of them.
> The Player highball vs the Terrarian highball: 136.066 Quettatons vs 13.50049 GigaFoe = 2,371,419,286,840x strength advantage for the Terrarian
Do note that winning via this method requires specifically the Hallow, as while the Player is vulnerable to their soul being taken, they do resist corruption due to being able to safely use a wide variety of corrupting weapons - so that means it’s entirely plausible that the Terrarian attempts this, uses one of the evil biomes, and incorrectly assumes that this strat won’t work.
The Terrarian: Doing… uh… A whole bunch of stuff via Shimmering the Player
By far the piece of the Terrarian’s equipment with the most hax, one squirt of this crazy liquid could take out the Player immediately.
Because for as many things as this liquid can do, it’s also completely random - we can’t even definitively say what it’ll do to the Player, it could be devastating or it could be completely benign.
Using just Terrarians as an example, it just makes most Terrarians have a different (yet still Terrarian) appearance; but it can turn the Mechanic into a goblin, the Cyborg (who’s part human) into a full robot, the Pirate into a ghost, the Angler into a kappa, and the Golfer into an anthropomorphic fox; while it doesn’t transmute the enemy pirates (instead rendering them invisible) nor the playable Terrarians (as it instead renders them insubstantial, causing them to sink through blocks and be unable to use any items at all).
The most devastating options for the Player, however, would be it turning them into something harmless like a Faeling (immediately taking them out of the fight by itself), or also rendering them insubstantial, allowing the Terrarian to very quickly set up a spawn trap via Shimmer that’d lead to the Player sinking down, down down, deep into the core of the planet (or underneath the Bedrock layer, depending on exact location) - removing the Player from a fight the moment they die once.
But even though we can’t say what it can do to the Player with confidence, we can say that any items dropped would get decrafted (or transformed into an entirely different item), taking them out of the fight entirely or forcing the Player to learn on the fly what their new weapon does.
The Player: Trapping the Terrarian in the Nether via a Nether Portal
This win-con comes from exploiting the one big flaw in the Terrarian’s revives - their revives have never shown them going across dimensions.
With that in mind, the Player could trap the Terrarian inside of the Nether and then break the portal on the Nether side, and thus win by battlefield removal.
They have the means to force the Terrarian through, despite the Ankh Shield giving the Terrarian a laundry list of immunities, being stunned is not one of them, nor are they immune to gravity altering effects that could be replicated with the Gravity III enchantment. And, while they’re immune to taking knockback, that does not mean that they wouldn’t be able to get dragged around from a fishing pole.
That being said, even ignoring the fact that the Player wouldn’t have any reason to assume the Terrarian’s respawn has this weakness, but even if they did the Terrarian has many methods of defending against it, teleporting out of the way before they can get stunned, grappling into the ground to stop the fishing rod (given their hook’s capable of pulling down the moon, the Player is not going to have enough strength to force them along without destroying whatever blocks they’re grappled to), or even just… destroying the Nether Portal outright with their rocket launcher.
Even if the Player does pull it off, the Terrarian’s highly intelligent, their UFO can let them move at around 186 times the speed of light (way faster than even the Player’s Corrupted Nether Beacon), and there’s obsidian in the Nether itself, so - while likely - it’s not actually guaranteed that the Terrarian will actually be stuck in the Nether for long enough to be deemed losing the fight, and once they do get back, their speed and range will allow them to destroy any future Nether Portals before the player even has a chance to drag them in, and they can avoid the issue entirely by bringing their own Nether and fire source along.
> The Player’s hypothetical speed vs the Terrarian’s speed: 10,838.8 m/s vs 56,000,000,000 m/s = 5,166,623.61147x speed advantage for the Terrarian
> The Player’s laser speed vs the Terrarian’s speed: 13.9c vs 186.795893310965c = 13.4385534756c
The Player: Convincing the Terrarian to hand over all of their equipment via the Love Medallion
By far the cheesiest win condition of the list, the Player could use the Love Medallion (which, contrary to the name, inflicts mind control) on the Terrarian and then convince them that the best way to protect the Player is to give all of their equipment over.
And while having some of the Terrarian’s equipment would be massive in keeping them alive, there’s one critical flaw in this strategy. It only lasts 10 seconds.
As soon as the Terrarian’s free from the control, the Player would never be able to pull this trick off again, as the Terrarian can very easily stay out of range with their massively superior speed. Even the Player’s invisibility wouldn’t work, as the Terrarian’s Hunter Potion allows them to see and track invisible beings, even through walls.
This is all assuming, of course, that the Terrarian’s even vulnerable in the first place, their immunity to the crimson’s hive mind gives precedent to the idea that their mind wouldn’t be affected by this (though it’s not quite definitive, given they are ultimately two different means of control, and the Terrarian could possibly only be immune by virtue of not getting infected in the first place).
The Player: Darkness Manipulation via the Shrieking Crossbow or Possession via the Spooky Gourdian
In theory, the Terrarian using these items could immediately backfire, either making them become one with the night or being possessed by the Spooky Gourdian.
Not only are these traits assuming the item descriptions are 100% literal, not only does the Terrarian’s encumbering stone protect them from picking up these items, but even if they did work and the Terrarian did pick them up… The Terrarian would have to, you know, actually use/equip them in order to suffer the chance of any ill effects. Something they’d have no reason to, given how much better their weapons and armours are in comparison.
The Player: Nullifying the Terrarian’s revives via Fred’s Gauntlet
I’m sure including Minecraft: Story Mode in this analysis is going to be a controversial decision when this doc comes out. From a vs standpoint, this one item is the only benefit it provides the Player that isn’t already covered from the three games, and we wanted to include everything for the Player to give them the best odds possible (as you can hopefully tell from how unlikely all of their other win-cons are to pull off) - and, while very different from the others, Jesse is too a player character, so we ultimately agreed to include his stuff in this document, if for no other reason than to emphasise the argument. If you are adamant against including anything from Story Mode, then you can skip this segment I suppose.
Anyways, the Player’s most powerful weapon, a golden gauntlet made by Fred, it’s able to harm the Admin, Romeo, block hits from his attacks, and - most importantly - depower him, nullifying all of his abilities until he was a normal… uh, Minecraft person as well. While the ability to revive from death wasn’t shown being nullified (as, outside of special circumstances, Story Mode characters are effectively all on Hardcore mode), it’s at least a theoretical possibility.
Romeo, when he was an Admin, was strong enough to, at minimum, sustain an alternate universe containing countless stars - and at maximum, was able to cover the entire Overworld in Bedrock, which has been said to be infinite in size, making it the Player’s most powerful weapon and the only weapon capable of matching up against the Terrarian’s.
> The Player (Fred’s Gauntlet) lowball vs the Terrarian’s highball: 16,880,000,000 gigafoe vs 13.5 gigafoe = 1250370370.37x strength advantage for the Player.
Even using the strongest possible argument for the Terrarian, assuming the solar fragment’s tooltip referring to “the fury of the universe” refers to solar flares, and assuming their power is equal to 1 solar flare from every star in the universe, is just short by a factor of… infinity.
> The Player (Fred’s Gauntlet) highball vs the Terrarian’s super highball: ∞ QuettaExaFoe vs 1.000e+31 QuettaExaFoe = ∞x strength advantage for the Player, obviously
There’s just two problems with it.
The first is that it doesn’t nullify every ability at once, so it could take several attempts before it actually manages to remove the Terrarian’s revive ability, giving the Terrarian time to both adapt and to learn how the gauntlet works.
The second is that it’s a gauntlet - aka a weapon whose reach only goes as far as your arm - against the Terrarian, who’s so fast, both in terms of flight speed and in terms of reaction time, that realistically the Player’s only hopes of hitting the Terrarian with it is to stun them first - and their ability to defend from otherwise lethal blows with it is entirely nullified as a result.
And now we know what each side’s means of victory are, we can determine how they could go about achieving them
The Player absolutely, unambiguously, needs to either freeze (assuming the Hand Warmer isn’t equipped) or stun the Terrarian in some way in order to have a chance to land either of their win conditions, as the Terrarian’s speed and teleportation means that they will never be hit otherwise. As far as landing that stun goes, most of their options once again run into the problem of never being able to hit the Terrarian to get off that stun, but a small sliver of equipment gives a chance:
Ice Trap could, in theory, freeze the Terrarian as they walk over it, but it’s such an obvious bait in a battlefield that they could just… avoid it. Go around or even above. Even if they somehow don’t realise what it is until they’re frozen at least once, they can then just equip the Hand Warmer and ignore it entirely from that point on.
Updraft Tome, also having AoE, and tracking down the Terrarian’s position until it’s delay is finished (though with the Terrarian’s speed, it’s entirely plausible that they could escape once they know it’s capable of stunning)
Shock Powder, being an AoE that the Player doesn’t have to aim at all, could likely get the Terrarian once, maybe even twice.
Frost Tower, its attacks are unlikely to hit individually, but - when protected by Protector Towers, they are a constant force that’ll force the Terrarian to equip the Hand Warmer in order to ignore them, But since they can only be built near the Well of Fates, that also means that the Terrarian would be near…
Stun Tower, by far the most reliable method to stun the Terrarian, but - as it’s a structure that can only be built near the Well of Fates - would force the Player to send the fight back there.
Meanwhile the Terrarian can stall out the fight, find the Player’s spawn and sabotage it, drag the fight underground and purify it, or even just spill Shimmer all over the battlefield. And with their means of spying on the Player, massively superior speed, ease of reconfiguring the battlefield to their liking, and their ability to instantly swap between three different loadouts mid-battle, they can effortlessly cycle through these various win-cons until they finally manage to pull one off, or - worst case scenario - wait out the Player and let them tire out first.
“The Player is just an avatar of an ascendent being who dreamed up the entire Minecraft multiverse as confirmed by the End Poem, wouldn’t they interfere and destroy the Terrarian within their dream?”
The validity of the End Poem as a whole is divisive within the powerscaling community, but let me make this clear.
If we’re going to continue using this dream analogy, the higher dimensional entity (which I will henceforth refer to as the Higher Player) isn’t a lucid dreamer - they don’t go around and twist things in the avatar’s favour (otherwise you wouldn’t have lost your first Hardcore run), not to mention that Higher Player itself is just a dream of another being, namely the Higher Player’s universe (which I will henceforth call the Higher Universe), so everything within the Higher Universe is part of that larger entity.
Not just the Player and the Higher Player, but also each and every single mob that tries to kill the Player in one of the various dreams, from the humble zombie to the almighty Heart of Ender.
So if the Terrarian is a part of this dream (as logically necessitated by them crossing over to begin with), it wouldn’t make sense for the Higher Universe, which emphasised that “the universe loves you” and “you are the universe” to actively choose sides when both combatants would both be part of the universe it loves, and this would be consistent with it not interfering when lower entities come into conflict with each other.
If all of that doesn’t convince you, then… Well we’re excluding those arguments anyways, since it ignores basically everything that makes Minecraft Minecraft in order to have an entity that’s canonically done nothing to help the Player suddenly help the Player in what would otherwise be a losing matchup.
Creative Mode is a non-canon gamemode designed to help the irl player focus on the building aspect of the game undisturbed, when what little narrative Minecraft has makes it clear that it’s all situated around Survival Mode. It’s completely implausible to actually use it.
But let’s say, for argument’s sake, that you do give it to the Player anyways. Well, then you’d have to give Journey Mode to the Terrarian to make things fair, and suddenly we have the exact same matchup except instead of it being the two being able to revive continuously it’s the two being outright unkillable by conventional means.
However, the Terrarian’s superior speed and superiority to all of the Player’s normal weapons means that, even if you lean things as favourably to the Player as possible in terms of win-cons, the Terrarian should ultimately still be able to pull off a victory via Stamina or the Shimmer, or finding an esoteric hax that can kill the Player regardless of their invincibility (since you’d need to prove that their godmode can block a particular type of hax rather than vice-versa).
The only way you could twist it into a scenario where the Player wins more often is if you assume nothing the Terrarian has can affect the Player purely because it doesn’t get past the Terrarian’s own Journey Mode godmode, but if you take that argument at face value the exact same argument could be made in the Terrarian’s favour, turning it into a complete stalemate.
The Player/draw/the Terrarian
The winner is the Terrarian!
AlienVGMyth64’s Gamer Cats vs VG Cats (Dad Cat & Son Cat vs Aeris & Leo Leonardo III)
Due to sheer size, the full profiles of the Player and the Terrarian have been relegated to its own separate document available here.
The Terrarian’s inventory weight
First, the encumbering stone confirms inventory storage is weight based, given its effect combined with the item’s tooltip “you are over-encumbered”.
Second, the Goblin Tinkerer confirms that the strength of materials in Terraria does not align with the strength of materials in real life, with higher tier materials being stronger (and thus possibly heavier).
Third, the shimmer’s decrafting confirms that most item craftings are a perfect conversion with no waste.
With those three facts combined, let’s make a lowball and a highball to determine the Terrarian’s total lifting strength
Lowball is titanium (as the strongest in-game material with a real world counterpart).
4 blocks of titanium ore (2 cubic feet each) make for 1 titanium bar, while a full set of titanium armour can be made from 59 titanium bars, and the Terrarian can wear up to 3 separate sets, for 236 titanium ore total.
Titanium breastplate is made out of 26 titanium bars, which can be stored at 9999 each, and the Terrarian can have up to 50 stacks of 9999 titanium breastplates, for 51,994,800 pieces of titanium ore.
In total that’s 51,995,036 pieces of titanium ore.
In the real world, 2 cubic feet worth of titanium weighs 113.1060 pounds (or 51.293571 kilograms).
This puts the total weight at 5,880,950,541.82 pounds (or 2,667,011,070.71 kilograms), making the Terrarian’s inventory low Class G lifting strength.
Highball is platinum (as the 2nd heaviest real world metal to appear in the game).
4 blocks of platinum ore (2 cubic feet each) make for 1 platinum bar, while a full set of platinum armour and a platinum watch can be made from 85 platinum bars, and the Terrarian can wear up to 3 separate sets, for 420 platinum ore total.
30 platinum bars make for 1 platinum chainmail, which can be stored at 9999 each, and the Terrarian can have up to 50 stacks of 9999 platinum chainmail, or 59,994,000 stacks of platinum ore.
In total, that’s 59,994,420 pieces of platinum ore.
In the real world, 2 cubic feet worth of gold weighs 2,677.78 pounds (or 1,214.62 kilograms).
This puts the total weight at 160,651,857,988 pounds (72,870,422,420.4 kilograms), making the Terrarian’s inventory Class G in lifting strength.
None of this will be applicable to other feats as it is still clearly a hammerspace inventory (as evidenced by being able to carry literally hundreds of thousands of breastplates, each of which are individually large enough to fit around the Terrarian’s chest).
Armourless Terrarian (barely) tanks Explosives
While only possible via the permanent health boost from life crystals & life fruit + the temporary health boost of a Lifeforce potion, the Lifeforce potion’s boost to vitality is explicitly 1/5th of the Terrarian’s base, so it should still be a valid feat.
Assuming platinum (as the most durable material in-game that can be destroyed by Explosives): https://vsbattles.com/threads/whats-the-fragmentation-value-for-platinum.127007/ - using the calc in the highball calculation below (just swapping out tungsten for platinum): 75*948,910,000 = 71,168,250,000 joules, or 17.009619980879734 tons, or 8-B (city block level).
The feat: the frame a martian probe disappears, the Martians have already arrived on Terraria. Terraria is equivalent to Earth (as Nikola Tesla and Sweden are both confirmed to exist).
Using the minimum distance 56 Million KM (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orbit_of_Mars)
For the low end and lowest end, it is assumed that 1 second in-game = 1 minute real time, as the watch implies.
(Normal End) 1 Frame @ 60 FPS (0.01666666667 Seconds): 3360000000000 M/S, 11207.75359865791c
(Low End) 0.5 Seconds: 112000000000 M/S, 373.5917866219303c
(Lowest Low End) 1 Second: 56000000000 M/S 186.795893310965c
The Nebula Fragment contains the power of a galaxy
G-Toasty’s calc is available here.
The Solar Fragment contains the fury of a universe
G-Toasty’s calc (and argument) is available here.
The Destroyer’s vibrations shake the planet
Generic calc here (33.7 gigatons).
The Wretched Wraith creates a storm
The Corrupted Beacon absorbs the sun’s energy (strength & speed)
As the beacon’s initial fire permanently turns the sun into a moon (and we can see it happen in real time), it will be assumed that it absorbed an equivalent amount as to what would be required to overcome the sun’s gravitational binding energy, which is equivalent to 136.066 Quettatons, or 5.693x1041 joules.
Speed is taken from this video.
We used this statement as a basis to calculate the feat off of, alongside visuals of what it looks like prior to corruption.
“In Minecraft Legends, you’ll also spot a corrupted beacon at the Night Beacon base – where The Seer uses what looks like an Orb of Dominance to corrupt a beacon core and drain the Sun of its energy.” - Written by Duncan Geere.
Romeo’s powers maintain a pocket universe with stars
Generic calc here (16.88 ExaFoe).
The Player’s speed against Sculk Sensors
Soundwaves are shown to travel 20 blocks per second when visualised for a Sculk Sensor picking them up.
1 Block = 1 metre, and b/s is using real world time to figure out what the equivalent m/s would be sound travels at the same speed it does in real life.
The player’s top running speed is 5.612 b/s normally, 7.857 b/s with Speed II status effect, and 9.064 b/s with Soul Walker 3 on soul sand.
The player’s top flight speed with an elytra is 30 b/s, when boosted with a rocket it’s 33.5 b/s, and when using a Trident with the Riptide enchantment is depending on human error, but should be roughly 375 b/s, and a theoretically perfect speed is 632 b/s
Speed of sound is, on average, 343 m/s, making 1 b/s equal to 17.15 m/s
5.612 b/s = 96.2458 m/s (Subsonic)
7.857 b/s = 134.74755 m/s (Subsonic)
9.064 b/s = 155.4476 m/s (Subsonic)
30 b/s = 514.5 m/s (Supersonic)
33.5 b/s = 574.525 m/s (Supersonic)
375 b/s = 6431.25 m/s (Hypersonic+)
632 b/s = 10838.8 m/s (High Hypersonic)
Armourless Player tanks a Ghast’s fireball
The Player analysis: Numbug, Scottscrab
The Terrarian analysis: Numbug
The Player analysis: Numbug, Scottscrab
The Terrarian analysis: Numbug
The Player: G-Toasty, Numbug
The Terrarian: G-Toasty, Numbug
Calculations by G-Toasty:
The Nebula Fragment contains the power of a galaxy
The Solar Fragment contains the fury of a universe
The Terrarian's Inventory Weight
Armourless Terrarian tanks explosions
The Player's speed against Sculkers (b/s information taken from the Minecraft wiki)
Martians' travel speed (lowball)
The Destroyer's vibrations shake a planet (borrowed generic calc): DMUA
The Wretched Wraith creates a storm (borrowed generic calc): VS Battles Wiki (original calculator currently unknown)
The Corrupted Beacon absorbs the sun's energy:
Strength: borrowed source from Wikipedia, whose own source is now an invalid link
Romeo's powers maintain a pocket universe with stars: VS Battles Wiki (original calculator currently unknown)
The Player carries gold: Vzearr
Armourless Player tanks a Ghast's fireball: GyroNutz
Current team (as of posting): Badtimes, G-Toasty, Numbug, Scottscrab
Unless specified otherwise, only the primary canon of a character is used. Media will be assumed canonical unless evidence against their inclusion is present.
Crossovers, if deemed canonical to a character, will not provide any scaling to the other franchises featured, instead only using the information present within the crossover itself.
Unless specified otherwise, a character will be taken at the latest point in the timeline where they’re considered combat capable (i.e. before they died/permanently retired)
Characters are assumed motivated to win and to prioritise winning, but are otherwise in-character (including potential restrictions against killing)
A character wins when they can put the opponent in a position that prevents them from fighting for at least 1 hour. This includes but is not limited to:
Removed from the battlefield
Unless specified otherwise, a character has access to all equipment that they can feasibly obtain at the point in time they’re included.
The winner will be determined by whoever can win more often over the opponent (even if the most likely result overall is a draw/inconclusive)
Unless specified otherwise, the starting battlefield will be assumed to be neutral terrain for both characters, though if capable of doing so a character can still move the battlefield to one more advantageous to them.
Unless specified otherwise, all characters involved in the fight will start at the furthest distance that leaves every character capable of attacking each other.
Fight narrations (and whatever other mediums we could hypothetically include them in) are abstractions of our research, and as such details may be fudged or ignored for the sake of a more entertaining fight.
