Wanderer

It’s hard to trust someone who didn’t exactly lie but didn’t quite tell the truth. They cut around the honesty and coated it in syrupy ‘I love you’s.

I’m losing pieces of me. They spill out like loose change. I don’t want to change, not again and again and again.

I still love you but I’m learning to be in love with myself again. I tried, and tried, and it never began. You can’t love yourself the most when you’re just searching for another’s hand.

One day she woke up and realized she didn’t want to talk to him again. Tired of waiting on answers; small talk. She picked up her frail bones and walked out of the casket that he had placed her in and she rose like the human she is.

She’s not a breeze that should be able to drift in and out of your mind. She’s a hurricane of thoughts and memories that you were lucky to find.

You moved me like the waves of the ocean. I wanted to bottle up your words and carry them with me, always. I forgot though, that wind cannot be contained and sunlight cannot be held.

You can call her “pretty” but another will come and sew beautiful thoughts in the quilt that is her mind. You can say she is “amazing” but someone will see how she is the hue of the rising sun and they will let her know, the right way, what she should. That she is better than you ever said, or could.

I’ll admit, my addiction’s quite plain. I love the way that people wrap their tongue around my name. I am not your “babe”, I’m not the same. I am not just a spark, I’m the damn fucking flame.

“Hell is empty & all of the devils are here”. Yes my writing is shit lol.