joe biden should do another stimulus check where the ira sends me a lox bagel. with cream cheese please
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@noukeeeh
joe biden should do another stimulus check where the ira sends me a lox bagel. with cream cheese please
irs.

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My Shane is an enabler. He’s gonna roll his eyes and tell ilya to fuck himself, but he loves that shit. He’s icing Ilya injuries after a fight barely hiding the fact that he found it funny. He’s providing information for chirps. He’s joining in on the fun cause he loves his husband. Idk man I just don’t think Shane, who fell in love with the NHLs biggest asshole is gonna be annoyed when he’s being an asshole.
I always think of the description I saw years ago: Self-imposed deadlines don't help me, because I know the person who set them, and they're full of shit.
Give yourself the treat before you start. I'm serious. And ideally during the task and afterwards too.
Executive dysfunction comes from a lack of available dopamine. Common advice is wrong. You need to provide your own dopamine before you can start. Otherwise you're trying to run your car on empty.
"But what if I still don't do it" well you already weren't getting it done anyway. Now you have a little treat. Try again later.
You deserve kindness and care even when you aren't being productive.
(Also read How to Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis)
I give my students a LOT of techniques for starting writing when it feels overwhelming or daunting, but one of them is exactly this: dopamine load BEFOREHAND. It may sound weird to people on tumblr dot com, but a lot of people seriously struggle with executive dysfunction when it comes to writing literally anything, to the extent that it can cause such symptoms as panic, depression, and AI chatbot use.
I usually suggest this technique as a "Reverse Pomodoro." In the original Pomodoro, you work for 25 minutes and then take a break for 5 minutes (the times vary, but that's the essential ratio). People with executive dysfunction often find this insurmountable, and they get even more frustrated, and then the task seems even more difficult. So instead, flip those times.
FIRST, spend 25 minutes doing something energizing and engaging that you like to do. Not scrolling social media passively, not watching tv, not napping. Try something like colouring, doing yoga, running/walking around the block, talking about your favourite tv show with someone in real time, playing with the dog or cat, making and eating a lovely sandwich, hula hooping, something active. Having a little treat absolutely falls in this category!
(on the subject of little treats: refusing yourself food until you do work is for fucking Puritans and you can be kinder to yourself)
Then, after 25 minutes (or however long it takes to eat the sandwich or finish the yoga routine, it doesn't have to be exact), spend 5 minutes writing (or doing whatever you're struggling to start). Most people can coax themselves into doing something they find difficult for five minutes, if they have already filled up the joy/energy/engagement bucket. You can put a timer on for the 5 minutes if you want, or if you find that annoying, just work for as long as you like.
The other key is: don't push yourself to keep going when you're frustrated or tired—that will just reinforce the negative belief that you already have, which tells you that this task is painful to do, and needs to be avoided. If you've commonly had to force yourself to do this kind of task, that's likely part of why you think of it as painful and have trouble starting it now. Also, you should just, at a basic level, try not to put yourself in pain for the sake of productivity. So just do it till the good feelings run out. Then start hula hooping or colouring again for another 25 minutes. When the tank's refilled, try another 5 minutes of work, if you can. Adjust times to taste.
Not every technique works for everyone, but I've seen this one work for many students who are genuinely and seriously disabled by executive dysfunction. And many people find themselves getting more and more excited and engaged in the "difficult" task—because the good feelings from the hula hooping carry over, and because they're suddenly able to do the task without feeling pain, and feel accomplishment without feeling pain.
from this article, which is well worth the read, if only for the fun of seeing zuck get dunked on
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Relevant XKCD: https://xkcd.com/2609/
theres ALWAYS a relevant XKCD for everything huh
reminds me of how artists flip the canvas to make sure their art looks good
Just flip the genders real quick and check if you accidentally made a cult

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it is so important that you are a little bit ugly. please get comfortable with having unplucked eyebrows and nonexistent jawlines and wrinkles. let your blue hair grow out into an uneven pale green and your clothes be old and mend them and modify them until they’re unique to you. wear lipstick which doesnt compliment your skintone and mismatched outfits which went out of fashion 5 years ago. be a little bit too loud and a little bit too passionate and as weird as you can be because oh my god there is nothing more disturbing to me than perfection. beauty is manufactured and sold to us and you need to realise that you are a fucking animal to live a joyful life I am so serious. you cant obsess over aesthetics forever please just live messily and make your body your home however you please.
if you dont do it for you, do it for all the teenagers who will see u in the street and know that they are not obligated to be attractive
Hope and Joy Detected!!
falling asleep during the day: slipping away on a clouds so easy
falling asleep at night: I heard an ant gasp downstairs
"focaccia, serves 4" yes all 4 me
"tiramisu, serves 2" yes all 2 myself
Pizza, serves 8, yes I 8 it all.
The reason why so many of y'all's feminism sucks is because you still believe deep down in your hearts that there are only two kinds of people in the world: precious, ethereal, fragile dollthings called "women", and violent, lustful, rage-fueled apes called "men". Until you throw that idea away, 3rd-grade-tier "girls rule boys drool, girls are princesses and boys are stinky :(" is as feminist as we'll ever get-- and I hope it's obvious that that's lightyears away from the bare minimum of where we need to be.

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being sad and horny is a privilege
the reason sex scenes exist in fiction is because sometimes people have sex but also to find out what the characters are lying to everyone including themselves about by wrapping that agonising vulnerability in a treat like giving medicine to a dog
you can also hold them down and force their jaws open so that they develop traumatic associations with treats if you want to and this is fine because they are not real
young old person tip for you all. go get some photos printed (pauses so someone can say bogos binted) and fill out a physical album
and annotate them with who is in the photos and when and where the photos were taken!!! your extended family 50 years from now will be grateful, and so will you if you end up forgetting any details
(sprints into room late, looking harried and frantic as fuck) bogos binted. did I miss it
@heatonice I have no self restraint and too much free time. I apologise...

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