wasn't much love to lose

‘I’m decent. You?’

Um...not bad. Anything interesting going on?

Ooh, don’t move! Okay, don’t freak - there’s a spider on you.

...please please please get it off before I start screaming.

Then I don’t really get why you’re complaining. I mean, it helps you stay warm, you don’t want to get sick or anything. 

Uh--well it's um...it's kind of awkward. Toting it around everywhere. People look at me weird.

I bet it does! Does it drag on the floor, though? I wouldn’t want my blanket to get dirty. 

Well, mine's short enough that it doesn't. It depends on how big it is and how much you have to bundle it up.

Then maybe a snuggie would be a better option.

Oh...I hadn't even thought about that.

Here’s an idea. Wear more layers, then. Because with the looks of it, it doesn’t seem like the snow is going anywhere.

I--um--I wear a lot of layers. The blanket just helps more?

Invest in a heavy jacket.

I really like the blanket, though. Just not carrying it.

…Couldn’t you wear a jacket?

Um...well I do. It doesn't really help much?

This weather is so cold that I bought my ninth parka yesterday.

You have nine parkas? I've never seen someone so prepared.

How have I not thought of that! 

It works amazingly!

Wear a sweater.

I've tried it. They aren't quite as effective.

Can you do that? Does that happen?

Probably. I mean, sometimes fathers get pregnancy symptoms with the mother of their child is pregnant. Is that similar?

I don’t know. I do sometimes. Sometimes when I look at spiders, but that might just be a coincidence. 

Maybe you get the headache out of sympathy for the spiders? You feel so bad for their headaches, that you get one too.

You’re right. I wouldn’t know which leg to focus on! That’d require too much concentration. I’d probably fall.

I will never understand how spiders manage it. Maybe that's why they get so many headaches.