maybe put yourself in the microwave?? are you fucking stupid? you have the mentality of a 9 years old and so everyone reblogging this shit. how can you ppl find this funny...wtf

the ants won't fuck you bro

I think we should let kids swear just a little bit

Hearing a 6 year old yell “fucking seabass” at his Nintendo switch is an experience I think everyone should have

150 million years worth of reptilian fury contained in a body smaller than a shoebox

My parents have been married thirty six years and my dad had to work a few hours early this morning (he refs hs football for extra cash), while he was gone my mom went to Dunkin Donuts to get breakfast and bought him his favorite muffin to surprise him when he came home and when he did it was with her favorite muffin from Dunkin Donuts and you know what I’m so not interested in all the cynical bs about love and marriage being fake like if that’s not some romantic shit right there idk what is.

you’re in her dms im hiding from something following me in the Paris catacombs

Need any help there

get out of her dms and come save me

Be careful what you say in there, some of the skulls still have their jaws and will tell your secrets to whom ever will listen

they’re telling me mortal kombat 2 cheat codes