wasteland, baby!

not now honey daddy’s busy sending pictures of a man in his 60s with his shirt unbuttoned to a groupchat so we can all call him a whore. yeah it’s gonna be a while.

“if there was anyone to ever get through this life with their heart still intact they didn’t do it right” andrew i’m trying to escape seasonal depression don’t do this to me rn

i was in the grocery store and saw an onion on the ground and picked it up, absently saying “poor little guy.” behind me a teenage girl started laughing and then stopped and went “aww. i’m sorry for laughing. that’s nice actually.” and the cycle of cruelty is broken for another generation as a young person realizes that it is not embarrassing to have empathy for another thing that was once living, because certainly to be a lone white onion rolling on the ground in a supermarket would be terrifying to anyone

show them no shrimpathy

i may be attracted to that old man

“now i’ve read all of the books beside your bed” is one of the softest lyrics ever it’s a gem

honestly paper rings is such a gem filled with pure, funny, heartfelt lyrics “went home and tried to stalk you on the internet” “now i wake up in the night and watch you breathe” “kiss me once cause you know i had a long night kiss me twice cause it's gonna be alright three times cause i’ve waited my whole life” “i hate accidents except when we went from friends to this” “darling, you're the one i want in paper rings, in picture frames, in dirty dreams” “im with you even if it makes me blue which takes me back to the color that we painted your brother's wall” “i want to drive away with you, i want your complications too, i want your dreary mondays, wrap your arms around me baby boy” and of course “i like shiny things but i’d marry you with paper rings” i basically quoted the whole song and i’d say im valid for it

me, to random strangers on the street: so like, Kakashi didn’t tell Sasuke that everyone he cares about is already dead to try and one-up the emo kid OR because he doesn’t appreciate Gai and Tenzo, but rather because he was at that point still pretty terrified of forming genuine attachments to anyone - or, if he did form them, he refused to admit them to himself. He saw himself as a bad omen whose love would get people dead, because it happened to everyone else and as soon as he recovered from one loss another one smacked him in the face. This is also in part why he was so quick to push Naruto to Jiraiya and Sakura to Tsunde and apparently avoided both of them for over two years. Yeah they’re his kids and he loves them, but Sasuke had walked away and Kakashi was Sasuke’s closest teacher and like, the only adult in Konoha who seemed to genuinely care about him. He must’ve felt like a total failure and he probably thought Naruto and Sakura would be better off without him too and - hey wait where are you going I wasn’t finished

it's 2028 and i can't leave my house because i didn't pay my amazon doorknob subscription on time so they came over and sealed my doors and windows off with cement

nobody really drops anvils that make people have funny birds and stars spin around their head anymore… they should do start doing that again

So true, btw can you stand on this x over here? I think there’s buried treasure under there

treasure? YIPPEE!!! (starts digging!!!!!)

THOUSAND ENERGY BEAMS ATTACK

I love this genre of tumblr posts that’s basically the online equivalent of playing power rangers on the playground