Don't call me Artichoke.

“I noticed.” his mouth twitched, though he tried not to grin. It was hard, talking to him, Kind of bonding with him and still being unable to really forgive him, to be hard on himself and Karian because he had been hurt too much. There were still too many feelings that he had to sort out, that he was not sure of and that were confusing him. He liked him too much, was too forgiving, but he didn’t want to allow himself to just fall into his arms like nothing happened. That wouldn’t be good for either of them.

As much as he tried to look at the wings and see the pain that had been inflicted on him, he couldn’t just ignore that they were beautiful, that he really looked like an angel, with his hair color and those wings. He swallowed when he heard the explanation. “Can you fly with them?” the question might hurt him further, but if he could use them, then at least they were useful additions.

Magan could see that he wanted to put on the bracelet, but he hestitated a moment, stared at them and then nodded. “They are yours, you can do as you wish…” he bit his lower lip and released it almost immediately. “Do they still hurt?”

“I try not to,” he said. “Actually, I try to keep them hidden at all times. There was one occasion when they were actually useful, though, and that was an assignment I had involving a demon. Fucker tried to fly away, and I wasn’t willing to let it escape.”

Karian gave no indication on his opinion regarding Magan’s questions. They came from a place of honest curiosity, and he couldn’t fault the other for that. Clasping the bracelet back onto his wrist, he was visibly relieved to have the wings out of view again. They were a reminder of a time that he’d rather forget, even if the results of that time still remained in other ways.

“No, they don’t,” he said. “They’re more annoying than anything else.” Which was entirely true. Trying to navigate smaller passageways, and remaining hidden in the shadows when working would have been a challenge if he hadn’t been given a way to hide their existence, and Karian made it a point not to mention them unless he had a damn good reason.

Right now, being honest with Magan was that reason. He moved to lean against the wall again, giving the other some space. The tension between them had receded a little bit, but things were far from resolved. It was possible that they never would be.

"That's good." he really was relieved that they weren't painful anymore  and shortly his eyes shifted to him, only to be fixated on the table again. It burned to blink and he was so, so tired, but they needed to talk and it didn't seem as if Magan would be any less tired in the next months.

“Of course…” he sighed. “Befriending you is hard.” again he closed his eyes. Elves. Elves. How did he even get in situations like that? He wasn’t human himself, but Elves and Vampires from another world were still a bit too much. Shapeshifters were no problem, he was used to them, but after all this time away from Karian and the others, he noticed just how weird this all was.

The fate of the women actually calmed him a bit, especially since Miria was safe. He still felt a bit protective about her, even though they didn’t really get to know each other that much.

Magan almost couldn’t stand to look into Karians eyes, but he forced himself to. It had been too long and now that he didn’t have the energy to feel big emotions anymore, he didn’t have to look away anymore to avoid going soft for him.

With a bad feeling growing in his stomach, he watched Karian getting up, steeling himself for whatever sight there might be. Without wanting to, he imagined scars all over Karian, burned flesh and bones where there had been muscles before. The mental image made him feel sick, but at least it couldn’t be worse than that.

And it wasn’t. For a moment, he just stared at him, trying to find scars and bad tissue, holes or anything, but the only thing that was there were the wings. Beautiful wings. His mouth opened, but he couldn’t say anything at first. The time when they tried everything out must have been horrible, but the result just looked so wonderful.

“You look like an angel.” he whispered, while still staring at him.

“Well, I don’t exactly play well with others,” he said with a wry smile. There were too many barriers in place that kept him from getting close to other people, and his occupation was only one of them. Karian had grown accustomed to spending most of his time alone, or with some stranger he might pick up during an evening out, but he would be lying if he said that the solitude wasn’t wearing on him.

Perhaps that was part of the reason why he’d sought out Magan after the years they’d spent apart, after he’d simply disappeared without a word. It was a foolish thought, that there was even a sliver of a chance that they could mend the bridge that he’d burned when he’d left, but this wasn’t the first fool’s errand that Karian had chased.

A white eyebrow arched at the assessment, wings shifting slightly at his back under the scrutiny. Having them exposed brought a measure of discomfort; they served as a reminder of what had happened in Evemyst, of the months of torture before the blissful oblivion of a stake through his chest. Even now, after recovering and learning to exist alongside humans without losing control again, Karian hated the thought of them just as much as he did the sight of them.

“We both know that’s far from the truth,” he said with a humorless laugh. “It hurt like hell when they managed to find the right enchantment, and even the Empress hasn’t been able to find a way to remove them permanently. She tried, but they came back a few weeks later, which was equally painful.”

He shook his head, finally tearing his gaze away from the shifter, unsure of why he’d even said anything. Karian reminded himself that he didn’t want Magan’s pity, but he found it difficult to remain silent when he’d promised himself that he’d tell the entire story. His fingers slipped into his pocket to retrieve the bracelet again, but he hesitated before withdrawing it.

As much as he tried to look at the wings and see the pain that had been inflicted on him, he couldn't just ignore that they were beautiful, that he really looked like an angel, with his hair color and those wings. He swallowed when he heard the explanation. "Can you fly with them?" the question might hurt him further, but if he could use them, then at least they were useful additions.

While listening, he set down the can and the wrapper, swallowing the last bits of the fruit bar. Slowly, he leaned back, resting his head on the back rest and staring at the ceiling. it was too much to process. He was tired, even exhausted, hated politics and still he tried to understand everything, but he felt like he was not going to remember half of it.

A headache was on its way, too, so he sighed silently. “Karian…” he murmured, closing his eyes for a moment. He couldn’t just process everything, but when he tried to think about a better time, he just couldn’t find one. There was too much to do, too much work, so he had to try and understand now.

“So… you tried to Keep Miria from killing Krysanna and then you just… befriended them?” he asked, just to make sure he understood what had happened, even if it was in a simple form.

Slowly, he turned his head at the last words, staring at Karian before opening his mouth to speak. “Show me.” his stomach churned, what kind of torture could they have done to him that left visible marks? Magan knew he couldn’t be mad at him if it was horrible, if he could see the pain in the marks, but he had to know, he just had to. Right now, he didn’t even feel a lot, he couldn’t be mad at him.

“I wouldn’t say that I befriended them,” he said. “It’s more along the lines of, there are only three elves that I won’t kill on sight, and two of them are Miria and Krysanna.” Karian could tell that it was probably more than Magan could take in at the moment, but if he only had one shot at this, he wasn’t going to hold anything back. If nothing else, Magan deserved honesty.

“Miria is back on my homeland. The Empress offered her sanctuary, so she’s safe. Krysanna spent some time in London with one of my colleagues, a werewolf actually, but she’s since moved to Pennsylvania and works at the café that my sister owns. She’s still nervous around me, but she’s not outright terrified anymore.”

He fell silent again when Magan spoke, turning his head to meet his gaze, and he almost refused. Even the elves, with all of their magic, hadn’t been able to scar his skin, but they’d left their mark in another way. He’d meant what he’d said, though; he didn’t want – or need – Magan’s pity. Actions had consequences, and although he’d managed to almost do the right thing, that hardly balanced the scales.

Standing, he hesitated for another moment, but then he stepped away from the sofa to give himself enough room. Nimble fingers unclasped the bracelet, siding it into his pocket, and he closed his eyes as the enchantment faded. The air behind him grew distorted, a vague outline forming before the wings began to take shape. Silver-white feathers, tipped with blue, came into focus, growing solid once the magic of the jewelry was removed, and he stretched his wings to their full span before folding them over his back.

The fate of the women actually calmed him a bit, especially since Miria was safe. He still felt a bit protective about her, even though they didn't really get to know each other that much.

Magan almost couldn't stand to look into Karians eyes, but he forced himself to. It had been too long and now that he didn't have the energy to feel big emotions anymore, he didn't have to look away anymore to avoid going soft for him.

With a bad feeling growing in his stomach, he watched Karian getting up, steeling himself for whatever sight there might be. Without wanting to, he imagined scars all over Karian, burned flesh and bones where there had been muscles before. The mental image made him feel sick, but at least it couldn't be worse than that.

And it wasn't. For a moment, he just stared at him, trying to find scars and bad tissue, holes or anything, but the only thing that was there were the wings. Beautiful wings. His mouth opened, but he couldn't say anything at first. The time when they tried everything out must have been horrible, but the result just looked so wonderful.

For a moment, his eyes flicked to the side, but before he could get more of a short glance at Karian, he forced himself to stare at the wall again. He listened to the story, trying to get everything sorted and furrowed his brows when the stories didn’t quite match to what he had heard the last time.

His mouth stopped its work, arms leaned on his legs with the food and the can dangling between his fingers. Unsure if he could just believe him, he narrowed his eyes a bit, swallowed and decided to at least listen to him until he was done before he was going to give judgement over the other one and his story.

Very slowly, he leaned back, staring at the stuff in his Hands, asking himself what he did here. Why he listened to him and why he was too inclined to forgive him for anything, if the story would just be true.

Swallowing harder this time, he shrugged and stared at the can. “That… was awfully nice of you. Why did you do that? Also… payback?”

“There has been a bit of political bullshit between Evemyst and the Empire of Zalyndrya for the past fifteen years or so,” Karian said. “Both parties have been trying to negotiate the terms of the exiting treaty, but they’ve been unable to reach an agreement. When the Empire offered sanctuary to Krysanna after her exile, Evemyst wasn’t exactly pleased with the decision.”

He hoped that adding some context would help Magan understand. If nothing else, it would give him something to process, maybe even add another layer of perspective. Karian didn’t ask for forgiveness. He knew that he’d been a bastard, had treated the shifter terribly, but if he could just explain how things actually happened, then maybe they could find some closure.

“Miria had doubted her mission, and that put her in a dangerous position,” he continued. “If she refused to follow through with the Council’s decision, then they would kill her, but once she knew that Malice and I were involved, she knew that if she did try to finish her quest, one of us would kill her. It was really a no win situation for her, and I’m all too familiar with that sort of thing.

“I’ll add that I have no loyalty to the Empire; my people lived within its borders, but we were not under their rule. My concern was ensuring that I did my job, which was to keep Miria away from Krysanna. The best way to accomplish that was to have her in a place where I could keep an eye on her. Once she made her choice, then I had no reason to hurt her. She was as much a victim as Krysanna.”

He fell silent for a few minutes, giving Magan a chance to process his words. He’d given him more information than he’d planned, but once he’d started speaking, Karian had found it difficult to stop.

A headache was on its way, too, so he sighed silently. "Karian..." he murmured, closing his eyes for a moment. He couldn't just process everything, but when he tried to think about a better time, he just couldn't find one. There was too much to do, too much work, so he had to try and understand now.

"So... you tried to Keep Miria from killing Krysanna and then you just... befriended them?" he asked, just to make sure he understood what had happened, even if it was in a simple form.

RIP Carrie Fisher 

Magan forced himself not to look at him, as long as he just listened, he could hold his Feelings back, at least that was what he told himself. He didn’t trust himself with looking at him, he knew that he was going to forgive him too easily when he could see the pain that may be in the others’ eyes.

He vaguely waved his hand, chewed on his fruit bar and then mumbled something along the lines of “Suit yourself.” it wouldn’t be harder or easier for him, no matter if Karian sat down or stood and even though something inside him told him to let him ‘suffer’, he was way too tired to be petty, also the silver haired probably had enough stamina to stand there for days.

While listening, his eyes were somewhere on the wall, fixed there so they wouldn’t wander subconsciously while he was chewing and drinking, he could already feel his teeth decaying from the sweetness of both his drink and the bar.

For a moment he hestitated, thinking about what was said, then he nodded. “I think so.”

Crossing the room, he returned to his seat on the sofa, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. Karian didn’t miss the way Magan avoided looking directly at him, and he couldn’t exactly blame him for that. It would have been easier to just stay away, to let him have the hope that Karian would never bother him again, and he was still tempted to take the easy way out and maintain the story he’d given when he’d left before. Magan would almost certainly hate him for it, but at least there would be some form of closure.

“What I didn’t tell you was that Miria and I had met several times, and not all of them were antagonistic,” he continued. “I traded a translation charm for information from her, and I gave her cash so that she could find a place to stay that wasn’t out in the open. She tracked Krysanna back to Pennsylvania, and when I found her there, I let her stay with me while she sorted through the choice she’d been given.

“If she decided not to kill Krysanna, then Evemyst would have called for her execution, but she struggled with the idea of taking a life when her target had wronged no one. Krys had already been exiled, and Miria believed that had been enough of a punishment. Still, it was down to a choice of her life or Krysanna’s.

“Naturally, I couldn’t allow her to follow through, but I didn’t have to stop her since she made the decision herself. Krys went to London with one of my colleagues, and Miria remained in Philadelphia while we worked out a way to keep her from facing her own death.”

He paused, lifting his gaze to Magan as he gave him a moment to process the words. It was far different than the news he’d delivered the last time they’d met, and he knew that there was a chance that he wouldn’t believe him.

“She was safely relocated, but no one could know that she was alive, so we spread the story that I killed her. Everyone she’d met on Earth had to think that she was dead in case Evemyst sent someone to question anyone who had come in contact with her. We even made sure that we had a witness to her death, an imperial advisor from my homeland who sent an urgent message to them with a portal that allowed them to see the event as it was happening.

His mouth stopped its work, arms leaned on his legs with the food and the can dangling between his fingers. Unsure if he could just believe him, he narrowed his eyes a bit, swallowed and decided to at least listen to him until he was done before he was going to give judgement over the other one and his story.

Very slowly, he leaned back, staring at the stuff in his Hands, asking himself what he did here. Why he listened to him and why he was too inclined to forgive him for anything, if the story would just be true.

He couldn’t throw him out now that he was here, he needed answers, maybe then he could settle down, sleep easy and not be as restless as he had been since the silver-haired had left him.

Without looking at him, he opened both the can and the bar, took a sip before beginning to chew on the fruit bar. Magan knew he should eat something real, something that had been cooked and that was nutritional, so he would have enough energy for the next exhausting day, but he couldn’t bring himself to it. It would mean work and too much energy output before he would get anything out of it.

For a moment he paused, swallowed and made a vague gesture with his hand. “Just… when you left. Why you left. Where you went.” it wouldn’t bring any peace to him if he just explained why he showed up again after this much time, he needed the whole story.

It was easy to bullshit people. Honesty, however, was difficult for him, and he ran a hand through his hair as he tried to recall every detail from when he’d left. So much had happened since then, some of which he was still recovering from, but Magan didn’t deserve more deceit. Resigning himself to the fact that he would be here for a while, he unzipped his jacket to remove it, and he removed his shoulder holster and pistol barely a moment later.

There was no reason to remain visibly armed when the situation was volatile enough.

“May I sit?” he asked. Karian wouldn’t do so again until he received permission this time; this wasn’t his home, and he would abide by the shifter’s rules.

“There were things going on beyond just what happened here,” he said. “Miria Skydream was a part of it, and I was a part of it, but the bigger picture was a political shitstorm that was brewing back on my homeland. I had a job to do, but I allowed myself to get close to you when I should have kept my presence here professional. That was one of my mistakes, and I can’t take it back.

He vaguely waved his hand, chewed on his fruit bar and then mumbled something along the lines of "Suit yourself." it wouldn't be harder or easier for him, no matter if Karian sat down or stood and even though something inside him told him to let him 'suffer', he was way too tired to be petty, also the silver haired probably had enough stamina to stand there for days.

While listening, his eyes were somewhere on the wall, fixed there so they wouldn't wander subconsciously while he was chewing and drinking, he could already feel his teeth decaying from the sweetness of both his drink and the bar.

His exhaustion was too much at the moment and even the shock of seeing him again couldn’t really wake him, rather, the unreal feeling of this situation made it feel more like a weird, horrific dream.

Even the anger that surged through him just gave him a little jolt of energy which didn’t help. Magan clenched his fists, trying to breathe slowly, deeply and to calm him. Every Explosion of energy just drained him more and the scales were also taking their toll on him.

Gods, how he tried not to cry, to fight back the tears that lingered in his throat together with a sob and it was incredibly hard. “Then do it! Explain yourself!” swallowing around the lump in his throat, he waved his hand. “Let me… I just need to… eat something.” without waiting for an answer, he walked into the kitchen, grabbed an energy drink and a fruit bar and returned to Karian, not looking at him again.

With every second that passed, he expected Magan to give up and throw him out, but when no such demands came, he almost dared to hope that they’d be able to have an actual conversation. Karian knew that his return had shaken him, and he remained silent as the shifter tried to maintain his control.

He leaned back against the door, deciding against taking a seat again unless Magan made an offer, and he tipped his head in a nod as he watched him disappear into the kitchen. While he waited, he recalled everything he was willing to remember of the time they’d been apart. Some things he’d buried too deep just to maintain his sanity, to hide the scars that had come from the consequences of his actions.

His gaze followed the shifter as he returned, and for the hundredth time, he wondered if this was a mistake. Perhaps he should have simply stayed on his own side of the country so that Magan could live his life in peace, but Karian wasn’t known for always making the wisest choices.

Without looking at him, he opened both the can and the bar, took a sip before beginning to chew on the fruit bar. Magan knew he should eat something real, something that had been cooked and that was nutritional, so he would have enough energy for the next exhausting day, but he couldn't bring himself to it. It would mean work and too much energy output before he would get anything out of it.

Even if he did have the real energy to attack him now, he didn’t know if he would do it. This was Karian, but still, he didn’t want to fight, also his words seemed to tell him that he could just send away, which he also couldn’t do. Magan needed answers. He rubbed his face and sighed.

The shifter really tried not to look at him, but it was hard, having seen him being the same as back then, finally having the opportunity to look at him, but he felt like he would cry as soon as there was a sign of emotion in his face.

“I wouldn’t, because I would be asleep.” he just stated and it wasn’t a lie, if Karian wouldn’t be there, he would be already sound asleep. Again, he rubbed his face, trying to get the fatigue to get away. At least the scales had vanished, so he couldn’t hurt either him or Karian, even by accident.

Karians words stopped his breath. Had he ever apologized? Tears now welled up, he got to his feet, his arms shaking and when he turned to the other, his voice was shaking, too. “Yes, yes you do owe me a fucking apology. And more than that. An explanation. Time. Even- anything!” breathing heavily, he ruffled through his hair in an attempt to calm himself.

He swallowed down a laugh; the response was almost typical, but this was not the time to add humor into the situation. Magan had every right to be angry with him, and Karian was honestly surprised that things hadn’t escalated yet. Maybe the years had changed them both. He noticed that the scales had returned to their place beneath Magan’s skin, and that was a good sign that the shifter wasn’t about to slam him into the wall.

Even if Magan had decided to attack him, Karian wasn’t sure if he’d fight back. After everything he’d done, if venting frustration through violence would help the shifter come to terms with his sudden return, then the last thing he wanted to do was hurt the other again. He’d heal whatever damage Magan could inflict, and it would take less time than it would to heal the damage he’d inflicted on the shifter before he left.

And there it was. His words of regret seemed to open up a door that perhaps the shifter had tried to keep closed, and the response he received was closer to what he’d expected when he’d first tracked him down earlier in the evening.

Even the anger that surged through him just gave him a little jolt of energy which didn't help. Magan clenched his fists, trying to breathe slowly, deeply and to calm him. Every Explosion of energy just drained him more and the scales were also taking their toll on him.

he’s a a cruise with his parents to australia where he’s gonna spend a year or so for some reason. can’t remember why but it was job related. his mom is worried that if he spends too long away from her without her constant advice (my mom is also like this lol) he’s going to do something impulsive and ridiculous. 

so, he decides to prank her by pretending to get married to a woman he just met. because he’s obviously so impulsive and ridiculous. so he’s talking to people and stuff and he asks this woman if she’s cool with pretending to marry him to prank his parents. and she says yes. then he goes and talks to the captain and crewmembers and he’s like “i have this ridiculously funny prank where i’m going to pretend to marry this lovely woman to freak out my mom.” and they, of course, reply hell yeah. so like since the first mate has the power to marry people, i guess, he agrees to the fake wedding. 

so at lunch he’s like “mom, dad, this is alyssa. i met her last night and we’re in love and also getting married.” and his mom freaks out and that could be that. but no.

if they’re gonna do this they’re gonna go big or go home.

so, he changes his facebook status to “married to alyssa” and invites all his friends to his wedding in the middle of the ocean. (and they believe him and congratulate him and he’s concerned that his friends think he would really marry a random woman he met like six hours ago) 

now his mom is getting really nervous b/c alyssa (the fake bride) got her friends she was on the cruise to be her bridesmaids. they got the first mate to “marry” then at dinner in front of people. the mom is horrified. 

anyway the next day he goes “just kidding!” and it’s hilarious. but then he has to contact all his friends who were calling him on the phone and stuff to congratulate him to tell them it was an elaborate joke and they all think he’s an asshole and he and alyssa part ways but keep in touch b/c they… actually get along pretty well. 

anyway like a year later they meet up again in boston (i think? big city that wasnt new york) and talk and end up dating for like a year and then end up engaged for real. and now he invites his friends to his real wedding and all their RSVPs essentially say “i’ll show up, but if this is another fake one i’ll fucking murder you” and the mom just flat out didnt believe him for a month because she’s not falling for that again.

and now they’ve been married happily for like three years and they’re expecting their second child who has probably been born by now