Not Enough

no cuz it’s the way that ilya covers his laughter after shane tells him he hired a stylist and shane’s all embarrassed because he thinks ilya’s laughing *at* him but really ilya just went through every single stage of grief three times over in under a minute and now physically cannot contain his joy and utter *relief*, not to mention the sheer preposterousness of what he was expecting shane to say vs what shane actually said AND IT’S REALLY JUST SUCH A SWEET MOMENT BECAUSE WE NEVER GET TO SEE ILYA’S WHOLE ENTIRE FACE LIGHT UP LIKE THAT AND I JUST

Shane Hollander, ten minutes after winning a Stanley Cup, actively being celebrated by his team, soaked in champagne and hornier than he’s ever been in his entire life: I need to text him. I need to text my no strings attached fuckbuddy arch-rival. This reveals nothing deeper about myself. This is just the best moment of my life and I would like to share it with the man whose dick I suck four times a year and who I have no feelings for whatsoever. The only thing that could make this night better is Ilya Rozanov inside me on the day I won a Stanley Cup (Who said that?) but I’m NORMAL and actually I HATE HIM and it means nothing that the only thing I want to do after winning the Stanley Cup is touch Ilya Rozanov’s dick (Who SAID that?) But he’s in FUCKASS BOSTON so instead of celebrating with my team or meeting a hookup to go home with because I just WON A STANLEY CUP I am going to text Ilya. Do you think he’ll sext me (WHO SAID THAT??) I deserve it. I won a Stanley Cup.