That Marvel Writer

- Thunderbolts in a pool -

Bob: “Can you guys play in the pool with me?”

Ava: “Bob, we are adults.”

Yelena: “Yeah we’re not into childish games.”

- 2 seconds later -

Bob: “Marco?”

Yelena: “POLO!”

Bucky: “What happened to being an adult?”

Yelena: “I never understood why people cared so much about their dumb friends until I got a dumb friend myself.”

Yelena, picks up Bob: “I’ve only befriended Bob for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then my self.”

Bucky: “Who would be most likely to join a cult?”

[Everyone looks at Bob.]

Bob: “Why me?”

Ava: “Because you have the mental wellness equivalent of the sanest person in the psych ward.”

Bob: “Well…..Yelena is most likely to start a cult.”

Yelena: “Why me?”

John: “Cause you’re as manipulative as a snake. Somehow you gaslit me into thinking Ava didn’t take my $5!”

Yelena: “But she didn’t.”

Bucky: “Yes she did Yelena, I literally watched her do it.”

Yelena: “No you didn’t.”

Bucky: “Are you….trying to gaslight me?”

Bruce: I owe you one.

[Four crows sit on a wire outside the tower]

Bob - “One’s bad luck..two’s good luck…three is health…four is wealth…five is sickness…six is death…seven is the devil himself……..[Sips coffee]…theres 4 out there meaning someone’s getting rich….”

Yelena - “How do you even know that’s true?”

Ava: [Runs in] “Guys I found money!”

Bucky: “Found or stole?”

Ava: “….shut up.”

I head cannon that Bruce is trans (FTM). So one of the perks of being on the run was that no one knew what his deadname was. He was a blank slate to strangers. He could just say “I’m Bruce” or “I’m Robert” even though he never changed his actual name to the one he preferred. So, he was shocked when he looked in his file and saw the name “Robert ‘Bruce’ Banner’ and not his deadname.

Other people have talked about it, so I wanna add on with my own opinion. The show has a lot of potential if they actually explore other characters variants besides Peggy Carter (Even though I like how her character is written, Captain Carter was somewhat pushed too much with too many episodes dedicated to her). Instead, some (not all) of those episodes can be replaced with lesser known/popular characters from marvel to show their character.

For example, the hulk. No Im not saying this just because I’m a Bruce Banner/Hulk fan, but because I feel like it they had him featured in the show a bit more then more people who enjoy his character. In a show with endless possibilities, the show paid attention and gave more episodes to Captain Carter, instead of making way for characters who need some spotlight. I have some ideas for what if episodes like “What if Wanda and Pietro knew the Winter Soldier?” Or “What if the Hulk became the Winter Soldier?” [I know these suck lol].

Question: What is it like living with a bunch of traumatized people?

Tony: Traumatized? I’d hardly say that’s true.

Bruce: We’re not…..that bad…right?

Steve: Tony had a panic attack last night after Thor slammed the door to the common room.

Tony: That only happened once!

Natasha: Half the time Bruce forgets to take his meds,

[FLASHBACK]

[Bruce stands in the middle of the kitchen eating an apple.]

Natasha: Hey Bruce, you take your meds today.

[Bruce looks up at her, and takes another bite slowly.]

Natasha: Did you at least take your anti-depressants?

[Bruce takes another small bite.]

Natasha: Goddamnit Bruce…..

Question: Who is the pettiest Avenger?

Tony: Now I know what you’re thinking. It’s me. But thats actually wrong. Surprisingly.

Natasha: It’s true. Tony isn’t the pettiest out of all of us. It’s Bruce.

Bruce: What? I am not petty.

Natasha: One time me and him got into an argument. I may or may not have called him clingy. In my defense it was in the heat of the moment. After that, like a couple weeks later, we had some mission I don’t even remember. Apparently Bruce got injured during that mission and never told me!

Bruce:….She called me clingy.

Natasha: HE COULD’VE DIED!

Clint: One time I ate Bruce’s food. Every day since he has stolen my snacks from the vent. He doesn’t even eat them! He just stores them in the lab! I move them around too but he always finds them!

Clint: I hated his father though. His father was so homophobic, so prejudice. He came to one of my shows and sat like RIGHT in the front row. At that point I had a joke in my set about hooking up with my boyfriend, and I thought ‘okay…alright for HER I’ll edit this’. So I walked Im state and went; “So the other day I was hooking up with YOUR SON!”

Bruce: Oh you like bad boys? Well sometimes I cite articles I’ve only skimmed.

Natasha, Cint, and Bruce all lay on a bed together. They didn’t know why, Nat and Clint were minding their business when Bruce invited them to chill in his room. And now they were there. It was the late afternoon, so the sun was somewhat still out and making the sky a light blue.

“Y’know what Ive been thinking about?” Bruce breaks their silence, sitting up in bed.

“You're thinking? Don’t hurt yourself.” Clint smirks at him.

“Oh shut up.” Bruce rolls his eyes.

“Let him talk.” Natasha plyfully scolds before turning to Bruce. “Continue.”

“I was wondering…what if we had a threesome?” Bruce asks, staring up at the ceiling.

Silence.

“A threesome? Wow, you're getting bold. I’m proud.” Clint Jokes.

“Shut up Cupid.” Bruce scoffs.

“Not his worst idea.” Natasha chuckles before planting a kiss on Bruce’s forehead.

“I guess you're right. It isn’t Banner’s worst idea.” Clint pauses. “Alright lets do it.” He props himself upp on the bed aswell.

“Really?” That was easy.” Bruce confesses.

“I’m easy.” Clint admits shamelessly.

“We know.” Natasha jokes. “Easiest person in the room. But yeah I’m up for it too.” she agrees.

“Jesus, thought it would be harder to try and convince you two.” Bruce alters his body to sit on his knees.

“Well unlike this slut,” Natasha gestures to Cliny “I just want to show our resident scientists how much I love him.” She gives Bruce a kiss on the cheek.

“Stop that tickles!” Bruce exclaims.

“Oh that tickles??” Clint grins at Bruce’s exclamation.

Clint goes on top of Bruce, wrapping his arms around himbefore bringing Bruce’s shirt up slowly. Once Bruce’s stomach and part of his chest is exposed, Clint kisses down. Starting from his chest and working his way down to make Bruce feel something.

Lust? Affection? Ticklish? Hard to tell. But all Bruce kniwns is that he feels something. Love.

“Clint stop!” He eclaims between laughter.

Clint keeps going, slowly pulling Bruce’s pants down. When his pants are down, Clint gently flips Bruce over, stomach down on the sheets.

“So what’s that plab? Clint shoves his dick up my ass while I eat out Natasha?” Bruce smirks with his face on the mattress.

“Ok that's really vulgar…but yes.” Clint moves to Bruce’s side bathroom with a smirk.

“I’m surprised at you Banner. You aren’t usually this vulgar.” Natasha smiles down at him.

Bruce picks his head up from the bed and smiles back. “I’m full of surprises.”

Clint comes back with a bottle of lube in his hand. “Alright big guy, lube or no lube?”

Bruce stares at him for a second before replying. “Lube please. I’m sensitive.” He laughs at himself.

“Oh? So you're too sensitive to go raw but not too sesitie for a threesome. Your logi never fazes me Banner.” Natashs bends over to kiss him on th elips, it's slow andhas the sex appeal of a pornstar.

Cluint gets lubed up while Bruce is prepared with kisses from Natasha. “Ready Brucie?” He asks.

Bruce gives a nod. Natasha positions herself in a v shape, her legs spread. Giving Bruce access to do whatever he wanted with his mouth. She pulls her panties down and tosses them aside. Clint goes behind Bruce, cock in hand like its a trophy. He inserts himself i to him, slowly starting to thrust to ease Bruce into it. Bruce moans softly, clutching the sheets like some sort of anchor.

Natasha gently takes a scruff of Bruce’s curly black hair to bring his head up. “Ready?” Nat asks.

Bruce nods obidently, allowing her to pull him between her thighs. His tongue goes to work inside of her. Doing it softly. So ift feels like a pulse. Natasha’s hands clench the sides of the bed. Her eyes shut and buiting her lip with pleasure. Pleasure she’d been waiting years to find. And she found it. She moans aswell.

The room fills with the sounds of the bed creaking, and grunts and moans of pleasure. Clint goes faster, which makes Bruce’s mouth move quicker. Hitting Natasha’s g-spot. Naat’s eyes practically roll to the back of her head with ecstasy. She finally releases, reaching her climax and bringing Bruce’s head up.

“Nice work, big guy.” Natasha pants.

Bruce gasps and pants back, but manages to give a short nod. Natasha gets off the bed, and watches Clint thrust into Bruce. Clint continues thrusting until both of them reach ther own personal climax, and until Bruce lays limply on his bed. Clint runs his hand through Bruce’s hair.

Ntasha sits on the side of the bed, havnng started to clean herself. “That was fun.” She says quietly.

“Fun?” That was amazing.” Bruce’s muffled voice comes from his face being in the mattress.

“I think we broke him.” Clint finally pulls his pants up and sits besides Bruce on the other side of the bed.

“No way, this is the most fun I’ve had in years.” Bruce admits, scooting up on the bed to lay against the pillows.

“Well I’m glad you had fun, big guy.” Natasha gives hima kiss on the forehead. “Becaue we can do this whenever you want.”

Food hogging or like hoarding a bunch of food. I headcannon(or it’s cannon idk correct me) that Natasha does it because in the Red Room it was used as like a punishment or reward. Like if a widow didn’t perform good enough, their food would be taken, they would have to watch others eat, etc. So that’s why Natasha was the best Black Widow (other than the fact she needed to escape). When she joined SHIELD, it took Clint a while to show her that she was allowed to eat whenever she wanted and wouldn’t be punished for it.

HYDRA did the same thing with Bucky when he was active as the Winter Soldier. Whenever he tries to runaway, didn’t do well on a mission, or refused to follow orders (at the beginning at least), food was withheld. Even if he cooperated, he didn’t get food until he “proved his loyalty” to HYDRA. When he joined the Avengers, Natasha did the same thing to him Clint did for her.