Live Fast, Die Young

Ava supposed that as far as certain material things went she didn’t have much to complain about as a kid. She’d had the essentials and a bit more. Taken ballet lessons with well-renowned dancers and had even been sent to etiquette lessons with girls from One. Material things didn’t help a child flourish though. Not in the ways that mattered but she had managed just fine on her own thanks to the some of the other adult figures in her life.

“My father wouldn’t take me when I was a kid. He sent me to dance camp instead. Told me something about it being a waste of time? And that I would be better off doing something that would help my cultural development. All bullshit of course but I wasn’t in a position to argue,” she explained quickly. Ava was so used to keeping most of her past life private that she would forget how she hadn’t exactly shared every insignificant detail with him. “Nah, I think we can skip Disneyland this time around. I’ll live. Being around adults in cartoon characters costumes has lost its appeal for some odd reason.”

"My mom just couldn't afford it..So I guess we are even there" he shrugs. He had never been the type of kid to want such things but it would have been nice to have the option. To have a normal family that could do normal things. But he had never gotten the chance  and now.  Now it was a little more than just too late. 

Honestly, Ava was surprised that he had stayed away for as long as he did after they got separated though he clearly had gotten caught up with his line of work. With her out of the way there was nothing to stop him from getting the things he wanted. Even if it had been directed towards the wrong thing; his ambition had been something Ava had admired. Until that very ambition had gotten in the way of their happily ever after. Then she had detested anything associated with the family more than she had before.

Jason has been driven from the start, driven by the promise of wealth and power and it had taken him this long to realize that at the end of the day none of that was what made him happy, none of that offered any real satisfaction. Losing her hadn't opened his eyes as much as it should have, yet coming back and being around her again was starting to. 

Ava was a lot more understanding than she had been when they had been younger. Or at least she tried to be. Her own stubbornness tended to get her into more sticky situations then she liked to admit. Jason was and would always be her first love and she would always care about him. It was one of those things that were sort of inevitable. Nothing she could do would ever change that. Unless he did something awful to her… which she couldn’t even begin to fathom. As far as she knew he wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. Not now anyway.

Jason wished there was a way to get her out of his life, to keep her safe without having to keep her around but there was simply something about her, it was like she was the sun and he was a planet, drawn to her gravitational pull. It sounded cheesy and stupid but it felt like the only comparison that was strong enough to describe what was going on. Part of him wanted to leave, but you couldn't fight gravity. 

Oh it’s fine even if you meant it that way. Not like it’s something I don’t already know.” Ava was well-aware that she didn’t know all there was to know about the family but she knew enough. And if she was going to continue to be in his life there wasn’t much she could do then just go with it. Nothing she could say or do was going to change the cards the world had dealt them. And if after all this time they somehow ended up being civil and actually amiable then who was she to disagree?

Jason was glad for Ava, even now that they weren't together she understood. Understood him and his world and how things around him worked. She understood what this big room meant and she understood how much he hated it all at moments yet could not find the way to leave it or change anything. Instead he tried to find the good in it,  tried to find the diamond in the rough, like being able to take her on this trip.

Availia should have let Jason long ago. She should have turned her back on him when he had returned to Panem instead of giving in so easily to his insistence on wanting to talk. She should have found a way to just keep him at bay. Shown indifference of some sort. There were so many things she should have done to avoid getting close to him again in any way, shape or form but she hadn’t. If the thought ever crossed her mind she wrote it off as it not being something to worry about because he disappeared so often that it didn’t make that much of a difference.

Jason allows for her to take in the splendor of the room and can't help  but remember why he can do this, why he can now give her this expensive trip and what he was to do while here, sure he isnt here to kill anyone or anything of the sort but the family always needed something  This time it was just his voice, his face. Or well, at least for now. 

Since they had made their friendship official she had done her best to simply let go of the past. They had both been a lot younger back then and while she didn’t think her expectations at the time had been entirely unrealistic in a normal relationship; she knew that’s exactly what they hadn’t been. All things considered they were doing well enough. Or at least that’s what she thought if she didn’t take into account her whole getting shot thing though that didn’t involve him in any way shape or form.            

Jason wanted to live in the now. Wanted to let go of all the bad and try this with her, try to be anything to her, and if that was just a friend, well he wanted to be a better friend than he had ever been boyfriend, he was already giving her more and taking less this way so maybe in the end she was better off. Better off without him because without him she had a chance at a real relationship  at finding the right person instead of the really wrong one.

Ava shook her head with a teasing smile on her lips. “You could have always brought your assistant along like you were supposed to.” He remembered. As much as she hated to admit it even to herself; it was touching to see that he remembered her talking about travelling. What else did he remember her telling him? There was so much she had shared with him in the early days of their relationship after all. That was all in the past though and now they were in California as friends. Just friends. Friends sometimes traveled together. It was nothing out of the ordinary.

"But she is no where as fun or as entertaining as you are so what was the point of bringing her?" he laughs teasing right back. Truth was that he was more than fine with coming alone, he had traveled alone countless times but this time it was different. It went back to all the things he had promised her while they were together. This had been one of them. Of course he figured she forgot, seeing as how he had made so many promises. Broken almost all of them..