Euphoria

that moment when you’re empty and nothing matters anymore . you don’t even know who you are anymore but it’s okay it doesn’t matter , you just want to disappear .

how could you love me? i don't even know who i am.

Having bpd to me is like I'm the loneliest person on the planet, no matter how many people I talk to, no matter how many connections I make or have, I'm a lonely void who will die alone. I have to be talking to someone or with someone every second of every minute of every day. I love people so much, I need people. There's so many people out there with different things to teach you. And then, if I have to talk to one person for more than 6 seconds today, I'll kill them. I'll kill myself. I need to be left alone for the rest of the day, I need no one but myself to be happy. I don't want to partake in anything with anyone because it's all draining and taking out of my alone time. Everyone is the same, they're all boring and self-absorbed. Every conversation feels like I'm forcing myself to be actively present. I just want to be alone in my room with nothing or no one. I don't see a future where I'm happy with anyone other than being by myself.

damn girl your bpd is really uh bpding

"u look tired" dawg i'm going insane

i cant stand it anymore i don’t want this brain i dont want this life i want to live but not like this not with those constant feelings and thoughts and self destructive behaviors and all of that i cant do it anymore i cant

So I cry as I hold you for the last time in this life.

God I'm so lonely that I feel like I'm losing my mind