With his arms folded neatly in his lap, Benji nodded his head attentively, listening to the student sitting opposite him. She had failed the last legal exam of the year, meaning her graduate position was going to be re-packaged and gifted to the student who performed better than her. âShe might have been stupid, but she wasnât that stupidâ Benji thought as she wailed in hysterics. People glanced their way, some obviously irritated for having their breakfast disturbed; maybe a public coffee shop was a poor choice of setting to console his friend. âYour parents wonât hate you, thatâs silly. They love you, and theyâll support you regardless.â He offered her cut-copy advice, empathizing with her pain but struggling to relate. She raised an eyebrow in response. âReally? You think so?â Her eyes glistened with a newfound hope. âOf course!â Benji beamed and wiped the stream of snot running down her nose. It was a lie, for all he knew her parentâs were going to be just as embarrassed and ashamed as she was. âNow look. Letâs call it a day, go take a bath, put on a face mask, you just need to relax.â
Benji apologized to the barista for the display of emotion as he paid for the two green teas, and made his way out of the cafeteria. He had called her a cab to take her home and offered his mobile. âIâm free whenever, just give me a ring!â He remembers telling her and immediately regretted it. Truth be told, he wasnât free âwheneverâ, he had five chapters to catch up on by tomorrow, or else heâd surely fall behind. He could hear himself breathing as he walked down the street, his lungs eating away at the thin oxygen he left for himself. What if he failed? Although he was surrounded by strangers, he couldnât help but feel alone with his thoughts, the expectations slowly stripping away at his sanity. âYouâll be fine. No- not just fine, youâll be perfect, youâre in the best position possible. Get it togeth-â In the midst of his internal pep talk, a brutal force almost threw him to the ground, as he stumbled back to balance. The stench of B.O, alcohol and expensive cologne tickled at his nostrils, as he looked up to come face to face with his very own brother. âNick!?â Benji gagged and covered his mouth, turning away for air. âYou look disgusting!â  Although he was usually composed and selective with his language, his impulsiveness sometimes made it difficult for him to mask the truth, especially when speaking to someone he was comfortable around. He was used to seeing his brother like this. It was Benji who used to cover for him, Benji who would offer to nurse him back to reality after one Nickâs crazy benders. âIrresistible? Definitely not today.â Benji chuckled lightly. The stark comparison between the brothers was undeniable. While Nick failed to even get his shirt buttoned, Benji sported a pair black skinny jeans, black ankle boots and a baggy vintage black jumper tucked in but only on the left side of the waist. âWhere are you going? Where have you been? What have you taken? What are you doing with your life?â Although he so desperately wanted to bombard his brother with questions, he knew all too well heâd never get a straight answer. Nick was never a fan of interrogations anyway, possibly because he wasnât ready to face his own reality. Pulling his brother to the side, Benji opted for a much softer approach. âHow are you feeling? You really do look like a mess.â He joked, digging into his tote for his water bottle. âIâm guessing youâre on your way to work? Count your blessings, youâre lucky to have almost knocked me out because you canât go in looking like⌠Looking like that.âÂ
He took out a small can of deodorant, a packet of gum, two Adderalls and some hydralyte. He watched as the hydralyte dissolved in the water, giving it an orange undertone, passing the âpick me upsâ to his older brother. Although he was a highly critical person, he didnât necessarily enjoy criticizing his brother. He was aware Nick was all too familiar with lectures about âresponsible adult decisionsâ and âgood life choicesâ, but while they had some effect on Benji, they never worked on Nick, evidently. In fact, he felt quite sorry for his brother. He wasnât sure why he made the choices he was making, but at the end of the day, they were only a reflection of his internal world. He knew the same could be said for himself, with his incredibly high standards.Â
Everything about him softened when he realized it was Benji he ran into. Despite Benjiâs words he smiled at the other. âHey, donât bruise the ego along with the goods,â he teased with a soft chuckle that matched Benjiâs. He might have felt bad about the way his younger brother sprang into action to help him but Benji liked it. Helping people was his thing. Nick was just providing Benji with another opportunity to do that. His smile turned a little wry as he took the proffered pills and water. The pride and joy of the Daltons passing out amphetamines on the street like a high rent drug addict. Wouldnât the senator be proud. Except Nick knew instead of owning up to his own responsibility for this mess their dad would pass blame to him. As if he got Benji hooked on recreational drugs instead of Benji caving to the pressures of keeping the high expectations on him.
Maybe he could help, not with the expectations, those were all Benjiâs as the only male Dalton heir worth a damn. But he could talk to Mal, figure out if one of the elixirs would have less issues. Probably would. Nick didnât know much about elixirs but surely they had to be better than adderall. If Benji was gonna be taking uppers the least Nick could do was make sure his little brother had the good stuff. A helping hand with all the shit Benji had on his plate. Because he didnât judge Benji for using them. It wasnât as if Benji was crushing them up and snorting them. Now that would have him a little concerned. Probably. Or not, everyone needed to kick back a little, enjoy themselves, especially Benji. Who was he to judge Benji for having a little fun, drugs involved or not. After a few gulps of the water, that was the only thing Benji had given him that would actually do anything with his fey metabolism, he spoke up. âActually Iâm on my way to find breakfast. LunchâŚâ Nick wasnât sure what time of day it was but he knew he had time before work for food and a shower. âYou hungry? Iâll let you pick,â he added with a coaxing smile. Usually when they did anything together Nick let Benji choose. A way of showing he cared. Theyâd do what Benji wanted or was good at. It might not be taking responsibilities off but he hoped it gave Benji a boost in other ways.