don’t call me baby again

IT IS HIS MIDDLE AND RING FINGER HE DOESN’T USE

Kinda blurry but

HE USES HIS THUMB TO PULL THE DRESS UP AND POINTER FINGER TO MOVE THE HAIR

COLIN DID IN FACT SPIDER-MAN HER

THE RING. THE RIIIIIIIIIING.

But I am also almost CERTAIN that he was going in with his thumb on her clit so maybe he's only half a gentleman ahahaha okay but seriously, wouldn't his ring be more askew if he was going Spiderman instead of Bunny Ears? Plus, he wouldn't be able to be in as deep, and from her reactions, he was going for gold.

I argue that his pinky was doing most of the work in pulling that dress up and he mostly just hooked his thumb on the underside (which makes sense because dresses were very hard to launder back in the day, we love a considerate king) and then he was okay with brushing her hair back with his index finger because she can more easily wash it.

I maintain that Colin Bridgerton went cum hither knuckles deep in Penelope with his first two fingers!!!!

Remember, Penelope is a virgin. Like extra virgin.

lol olive joke

After further consideration, would he really have been able to get two in the pink if this was her absolute first time?

If his middle finger goes in, like IIIIIIN, and he uses the heel of his palm on her clit and sometimes his thumb, woo boy that’s impressive

I’m just glad we agree that the middle finger was certainly “going for gold,” as you so eloquently stated.

I argue the wingman was his index finger

Evidence 1:

Enough said

Evidence 2:

His index and middle finger are much closer in size and length than his index and ring finger. In proper cave diving, it is important for equipment to be consistent! His ring also maintains the same orientation pre-fingering as post-fingering, and with how heavy they were going at it

that thang would have been on backwards by the time he was done

However, you are so right-- he was using the heel of his palm to rub her off whilst he was (heavy) petting her from the inside out!!! Which is why he feels alright to adjust her dress with his thumb. He literally had her in the palm of his hand.

The two in the pink are his index and middle. Penelope is a woman who wants it all and he's giving it to her!

I believe this is when digit 2 went in. Cause he’s also absolutely entranced. Besotted. Going crazy at the fact that he is KNUCKLES DEEP in his best friend and he loves it.

While I think ol’ ringy DEFINITELY saw some action, middle finger did the most and pointer was the assist.

Luke Newton the man that you are, you fantastic actor you.

@dollypopup I truly appreciate this conversation, I applaud your debating skills, well done.

Bravo.

It has been an honor discussing this with you and coming (ha) to a conclusion.

Norfolk

Late light and longing - Dmitri Cavender , 2001.

American, b. 1957 -

“Whatever teaches us to talk to ourselves is important: whatever teaches us to sing ourselves out of despair. But the painting has also taught me that we can speak to each other across time. And I feel I have something very serious and urgent to say to you, my non-existent reader, and I feel I should say it as urgently as if I were standing in the room with you. That life—whatever else it is—is short.

That fate is cruel but maybe not random. That Nature (meaning Death) always wins but that doesn’t mean we have to bow and grovel to it. That maybe even if we’re not always so glad to be here, it’s our task to immerse ourselves anyway: wade straight through it, right through the cesspool, while keeping eyes and hearts open. And in the midst of our dying, as we rise from the organic and sink back ignominiously into the organic, it is a glory and a privilege to love what Death doesn’t touch.