⋆⭒˚.⋆

ways

To articulate myself

I go downstairs to get my phone

I thought I could finally confess

I notice her eyebrow piercing has been taken out (it’s been infected for months from when she fell over drunk) and I say:

‘I’m glad you finally took it out, some things only heal when you take them out’

And she agreed

Actually I’ve decided I made this whole dialogue up but the point is it was super insightful and peaceful like there was acceptance or something. It was also embracing a movement away from a type of life as the behaviour from when she hurt her piercing was more ‘reckless’ and caused mess and damage. So her taking out the piercing so it can finally heal was important.

But when I am

I’m like, well I’m so much more than that

Same with attention

I want to be seen as attractive

But if I get any attention of any sort from someone who is not the epitome of what I’m interested in then I feel weird

Physical attraction only feels right in very specific situations

Attention from anyone is just attention

I’d decided in my mind that people who would experience that, also listen to Ethel Cain.