I woke myself up thinking of
ways
To articulate myself
I go downstairs to get my phone
I thought I could finally confess
But they didn’t ask
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@new2-it
I woke myself up thinking of
ways
To articulate myself
I go downstairs to get my phone
I thought I could finally confess
But they didn’t ask

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It’s the start of summer and I’m already questioning the point of existence
What I love abt the song ‘crushcrushcrush’ by Coco and Clair Clair is the sudden switches between glazing and roasting your crush like yess that is exactly how I talk about them to my friends 🥴
Kinda need a rap version of Cocteau twins bcs I barely listen to lyrics but if their swearing every 5s it’s kinda hard to ignore. I want the beat and rap without the offense
I would pay for a colour match of my pinched cheek and plump lip and have that made into my perfect makeup tone

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I’m not autistic but I wonder if talking to someone ever feels like texting someone but they don’t use any emojis or capital letters so you can’t work out the tone. Idk. I should probably ask my autistic friends lol
Oh my goodness. I’ve just realised I had a dream the other night abt my ex bsf and I meet her again.
I notice her eyebrow piercing has been taken out (it’s been infected for months from when she fell over drunk) and I say:
‘I’m glad you finally took it out, some things only heal when you take them out’
And she agreed
Actually I’ve decided I made this whole dialogue up but the point is it was super insightful and peaceful like there was acceptance or something. It was also embracing a movement away from a type of life as the behaviour from when she hurt her piercing was more ‘reckless’ and caused mess and damage. So her taking out the piercing so it can finally heal was important.
In my dream it was at least
I want to be found attractive so strongly
But when I am
I’m like, well I’m so much more than that
Same with attention
I want to be seen as attractive
But if I get any attention of any sort from someone who is not the epitome of what I’m interested in then I feel weird
Physical attraction only feels right in very specific situations
Attention from anyone is just attention
Attraction alone is not enough to feel wanted
I wonder how long I will have to walk until I don’t know the landscape
I wonder how long I will have to walk until I reach your door
I’m tempted to break no contact just to say ‘what has been the biggest adversity in your life?’
This may be my new go-to conversation starter tbh

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Maybe when your eyebrow piercing finally heals, so will we
the niche community of well-off (often white) British private school girls, and their ‘formal wear’- dresses- feels like an example of the rise of the conservatism dress of the youth.
or maybe I just think the dress style is ugly…
Not long ago my friend ovrdsd (she’s fine lol) at a rave and the only thing I took away from it was how she kept asking for Ethel Cain to be played. Moral of the story: download Ethel Cain.
I’d decided in my mind that people who would experience that, also listen to Ethel Cain.
So I’m downloading Ethel Cain.
I think to truly be Christian you have to be a little anti-capitalist..
not sure if this will be seen. but I didn’t want to get twitter and I don’t exactly have anywhere else to post my thoughts anonymously 🗝️

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