let it go

i've been thinking  about it

how it would taste it's scent

i found one and i took it

i hid in my bathroom i'm nervous

i took the first breath and held it

i took the second but swallowed it

it was horrifying but i didn't stop

i looked in the mirror so ugly

it didn't change anything it didn't

it tasted like ashes and it stayed

the mouthwash didn't do anything

i'm afraid it would stay forever

the taste it won't go away

it was a simple question what is the foundation of our friendship i asked

i jokingly suggest love? beauty? i didn’t want you to answer

i was afraid

you answered it was simple maybe even a joke but i was stumped

i wish you didn’t answer at all

you are my safe haven my confidant and i am afraid of losing you but i realize that i shouldn’t be

maybe you’re just like everyone else turning into someone i dislike just because

when you're love ones are dead it means they're dead never to return and will never be there to love you

this year realize that tomorrow they might be gone

this year realize that you can make them happy

this year realize that this might be the last year you can make them happy

this year realize that you can't turn back time

this year realize that you have a lot to lose

they aren't material things

realize that you can lose them your family, your treasure

realize than when you do lose them there will be no more laughter the laughter that you love so much that comes from your very core

no joy no forgiveness no second chances nothing at all

this year is the time  to make them happy

this year is the time to make yourself happy

I really don't like you most of the time. I know I had a crush on you, I admit but seriously, I can't stand you. I miss you sometimes but now I feel acrimonious . I hate your stupid face.

It's so stupid.

You boast around and I really don't appreciate it. Why? Because you boasted that you're a 'make-up guru' and after that sentence you said that it's amazing you finally bought that lip balm! It's a balm! Elementary students use it! It's not something to be proud about (I'm sorry, maybe its somehow is but I can't see it like that because I like make-up and I don't consider a singular balm as makeup, okay?) 

I saw your picture on Facebook.

I see you failed that attempt at your father's event. 

Oh! A wedding! Now that's what I'm talking about! An improvement! Hmm.. but I seriously think that its a work of a makeup artist. Anyways, I find it stupid! 

you could have said you didn't want to so i wouldn't have to wait

i didn't want to pressure you but you said yes

and then you didn't give it back but i kept on waiting waiting

and now i'm regretting because you have it my pages and my secrets

you forgot you forgot you forgot always

you always forget and it hurts because i can't stop being your  friend

and now most of the time i really don't want to be

i hate you i need you go away leave