Unraveling Truth

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                                                    are you afraid of the                                            BIG BAD WOLF?

“I wanna take a girl to the Grand Canyon, fuck her, and then throw her in.”

“Poopy ass dicks”

“This game makes my dick ROCK HARD”

“You gotta make a statement. You gotta look inside yourself and say ‘What am I willing to put up with today?’”

“I didn’t know you were such a big fan of dick!”

“Why always the wall? Always the wall; every time the wall.”

“Ridin’ on cars!”

“I’LL SMASH YOUR BALLS ON MY FACE”

“What if your name was Ophelia and somebody was like, ‘Ophelia bro.’”

“The first thing that they texted me was, ‘I think a fun line to say at a gay bar is hey, who’s dick do I gotta’ suck to suck a dick around here?’" 

“You can’t open up the story of my life, and just fucking go to page 738 and think you know me.“

“You know when it’s cold and you get pit-sweat inexplicably?”

“No, that sounds amazing, fuck you.”

“Well thank you so much, that’s so nice of you to say, but I don’t believe you and you’re a liar.”

“We’re not all gynovaginologists like you are.”

“You’re making my penis.”

                                     SMOLL  ANGRY DOG

“I think I’m pregnant.”

“I’m pregnant.”

“I think I need to buy a pregnancy test.”

“I’m pregnant and it’s yours.”

“I’m not sure who the father is.”

“The baby’s coming!”

“…It’s twins.”

“I’m pregnant, but you’re not the father.”

“I’ve got somebody pregnant.”

“Shit, I’ve knocked her up!”

“I think we should adopt.”

“I want children.”

“I want a baby.”

“I don’t ever want kids.”

“There’s something wrong- I think it’s the baby!”

“Take me to the hospital, now!”

“I lost the baby…”

“Hey, meet ______ your son/daughter.”

“I’m having a baby!”

“We’re having a baby!”

“Surprise, I’m pregnant!”

“I think she’s pregnant.”

“I think she’s lying about the pregnancy.”

“I said you were the father but I lied.”

“I cheated on you and now I’m pregnant.”

“You may be their father but you’ll never be their dad.”

“My boyfriend/girlfriend left when I told them I was pregnant.”

“I’m not ready to be a mother/father!”

“I want an abortion.”

“I’m giving him/her up for adoption.”

“The doctor said there’s something wrong…”