toby

i’m toby, 18

he/him.

i love old churches, cowboys, architecture, movies, leather jackets, abandoned places, knives, music, drawing, violence, cigarettes, vodka, spending way too much time on pinterest, platform boots and anything that’s gross, disturbing and wrong

i also love my amazing, handsome bf

i am professionally awkward, chronically nostalgic and traumatized by christianity

i’m friendly, i promise.

come say hi.

no dni, i block freely

warning: occasional nsfw text, possibly triggering mental health topics, and general tomfoolery

moot me up !

a whimper escaped the rookie's lips, so quiet it barely reached the other's ears

“you’re just taking it?” the standing boy asked, pushing a strand of hair off his sweaty forehead, towering over him.

“you want me to hit you back?” the rookie queried

there was a flash of silence, where they both just stared at each other. quite awkward, because the rookie knew goddamn well he couldn’t do it, no matter how hard he would try.

the other just scoffed, clearly to mock him, disgusted by his softness.

the rookie stood up, brushing the dust off his worn out jeans. another bit of silence passed between them.

“then what is it?” the rookie probed shyly

“nothing” the rushed response fell from the older boy's lips, as his eyes drifted away, suddenly finding the haystack more intresting that the face of the buckaroo infront of him “just…fight back, man the fuck up, rookie” he spat the words like poison, trying to beat the boy out of him.

with that the boy turned around on his stacked heel, and let out something that sounded like a sigh of frustration, or perhaps relief while stepping out of the cowshed.

the rookie just stood there, pinned in place, watching his figure wandering off towards the sun.

then the sharp pain in his stomach brought the boy back to reality, forcing him to look away, clutching his bruised stomach.

the words kept repeating in his mind

“man up”

this coming from another boy, having masculinity brutally forced onto him, was even more humiliating than hearing it from the cowpuncher when he lost a cow while herding cattle again.

“man up.”

“man. up.”