N&D Satisfaction

It was late in the evening as you approached Negans bedroom with supplies for him. Opening the door you found him shirtless facing a mirror on the wall, his eyes instantly finding your reflection.

“Hello, beautiful” he winked at you as you noticed he was in the middle of shaving.

“Come on in” he tilted his head to carefully shave his jaw line. You walked up behind him and watched how he slowly worked with his rough hands. The sight of him shirtless in his black pants was one you didn’t see often but you very much liked. He noticed the way you were staring at him and turned to face you, silently stretching his arm out towards you handing out the blade. You raised a brow suspiciously.

“Do you mind, doll?”

“Putting your life in my hands now?”

He grinned as you slowly took the blade from him and followed him to a chair.

Negan sat down before you comfortably as you unexpectedly got onto your knees between his legs.

“Well, well, well..” he raised his brows as you sat the bowl of water beside you. Coming face to face with him you smiled-

“Don’t move now” slowly you began to glide the blade against his skin. Focusing on what you were doing you didn’t notice how focused he was on you. His eyes glimmered tracing your every feature.

“Did I ever tell you how gorgeous you look when you concentrate?” He squinted his eyes with a slight smirk as you shook off the blade in the water.

“Actually, no” you responded playfully as you continued.

“Well you do” you leaned closer towards him tilting his head back as you carefully shaved under his chin.

“Mmm” he moaned as you finished up that section and felt his hands slowly grab onto your waist.

“Negan” you raised a brow wiping his neck with the towel.

“Serena” his tone was seductive as he gave you a slight squeeze.

“Let me finish, will you?”

“Go ahead, baby” he winked as you sighed with a smile.

“What’s the matter? Afraid I’ll distract you?”

“Not at all” He grinned as you proceeded, he liked how you played hard to get at times. Your tongue sliding over your top lip as you focused on the angle of his jaw.

“Now how do you expect me to stay quiet while you’re doing that?”

“Doing what?” You finished the last of it, drying him off completely with a towel as you stood up.

“Here let me help you, give me this” he took the bowl of water from your hand placing it back on the floor, tossing the blade and towel aside before pulling you onto his lap.

“Come here” you couldn’t help but smile.

“I should go now-“

“Go where? I want you here.”

“Oh do you?”

“Oh abso-fucking-lutely” he placed his hand on the back of your neck pulling you towards him and kissed you passionately. Your hands brushing through his hair, he moaned deeply as he kissed you. Slowly he slid his hand under your shirt cupping your breast before he began teasing your nipple inbetween his fingers. You moaned throwing your head back as he looked up at you biting his bottom lip. He knew how much you loved when he teased your breasts. Lifting up your shirt you soon felt his lips closing around your nipple and pulled him closer. His tongue swirling sending goosebumps through your body, you didn’t want him to stop. He began unbuttoning your pants and you quickly stood up helping undress yourself as his lips found its way up the side of your neck back to your lips. He pushed you slowly making you walk backwards as you stumbled.

“Don’t let me fall” you laughed against his lips as a deep chuckle escaped him just as he suddenly picked you up and threw you onto the bed. He laughed at your reaction as you squirmed watching him unbuckle his pants.

“Come on” you whispered excitedly.

“Are you rushing me?” He raised a brow with a smirk.

“Maybe” you brushed your foot up his crotch area with a devilish look.

“Serena Serena…” he looked down at your foot as you continued. Slowly you pulled your foot back and spread your legs for him, teasing him as you began to play with yourself. You could tell he fell in love with the view you gave him. Eagerly he pushed his pants down grabbing your ankles pulling you against him. His body falling against yours he kissed you and as he did you felt him slide in you. Moaning simultaneously you dug your fingers into his hair, brushing his lips across your face he hid his face in the crook of your neck. Each stroke filling you with exstacy, he took your hands and intertwined his fingers with yours holding them down.

“Is this what you wanted, baby?” He whispered against your ear as you whimpered a soft ‘yes’.

“I’m sorry, what was that, sweetheart? I couldn’t hear you” his seductive voice teased as he began to move faster.

“Yes..”

“Louder” he demanded as the headboard slammed against the wall with each thrust.

“Yes, just like that!” You finally screamed making him smirk. He lifted himself up to get a look at you beneath him, your face was flushed and you were out of breath, he knew what that meant. He slowed down his thrusts reaching between you both and began playing with your clit. Penetration and stimulation at once your body could feel an orgasm coming much faster than you expected...much stronger..

“Oh fuck” you gasped as your body shook beneath him in a way you could not control. He felt you pulsating around him rapidly as you cried out almost pushing him away.

Negan was now apart of a group you had been staying with for the past year. Neither of you knew much about each other but it was clear the two of you enjoyed spending time with one another. Week after week looking for one another, feelings grew.

Negan had a past just as you did, but neither of you spoke of it and you liked it better that way.

That afternoon Negan sat with you to eat like he usually did. The two of you would take breaks around the same time to accompany each other and talk.

“I have a little something for you” Negan proceeded to pull out something wrapped in a blue cloth. Unwrapping it slowly he revealed a book.

“Oh, you got me a gift” you responded playfully with a smile.

“Mhm” he smirked proudly as he handed you the book.

“Oh…” the look in your eyes instantly dropping, he furrowed his brows not sure why the sudden change of expression.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing I just-“

“You don’t like it”

“This was my brothers favorite book” you whispered, a faint smile appearing on your lips as your hands brushed down the cover. Negan looked down at you with a sigh.

“I’m sorry-“

“It’s ok, it’s nice to have some reminders of Glenn” Negan froze at the very familiar name you mentioned. He cleared his throat as you opened the book and slowly turned the page. Negan never knew you had a brother….much less that his name was Glenn.

“Glenn” Negan repeated in a hoarse tone making you look up.

“Yes…I don’t speak of him much…he was killed seven years ago..” you looked down at the book.

“His wife explained to me what happened but…I still don’t know who did it. She never liked mentioning his name…I don’t even know what happened to her..” you looked up with a sarcastic laugh.

“What’s new though right?” you turned another page as Negans jaw clenched. His body tensing with the information he was just given.

How the hell could it be?

Negan had no knowledge of having any other family but Maggie.

“Sorry…didn’t mean to ruin this surprise” you looked up noticing an almost disturbed look in his eyes.

“You ok?” You placed your hand on his making him quickly pull away.

“I need a drink” he abruptly stood up walking towards the bar your sanctuary was lucky enough to have. You stared at him confused as you grabbed the book and quickly followed.

Negan grabbed a bottle pouring himself whiskey chugging it down quickly.

“Negan-I’m sorry” you caught up to him.

“I didn’t mean to ruin the moment. I love the book”

“You didn’t ruin a thing, doll” he responded without looking back at you taking another quick chug.

“So then look at me” you watched as Negans broad shoulders rose and fell as he took a deep breath. He couldn’t bring it upon himself to look you in your innocent brown eyes knowing what he had done. Knowing you wouldn’t want anything to do with him if you knew the truth.

Without saying a word he stood up and left the room with all strength he had, refusing to look back at you. Your heart felt as if it sunk deeply into the pit of your stomach. There was no explanation as to what made him suddenly act this way. After many weeks of getting to know one another, spending time together, this was a side of him you weren’t familiar with.

You refused to let it end this way.

Barging into his bedroom you found Negan looking out his window brushing his hand through his hair. He almost seemed stressed.

“What the hell are you doing?” He turned to you as you shut the door behind you.

“What the hell did I do? And don’t tell me nothing because clearly there’s somethig”

Negan sighed.

“You didn’t do a thing, sweetheart”

“So why are you acting weird after you gave me this book?”

He couldn’t find the words to say as you looked up at him clearly upset. The slight scrunch of your nose and furrow of your brows, your hand on your hip, there he was distracted again by any little move you made.

“Cindy. You should leave” his voice was low.

“I’m not leaving” you responded, he pressed his lips together clearly frustrated that you wouldn’t listen.

“It’s for your own good”

“What the hell would you know what’s good for me?” Even through all the attitude and stubbornness, he couldn’t help but be caught up in the intense attraction he had for you. All he could do was stare down at you with so much going through his mind at once.

“Oh you have nothing to say now, huh?” You tilted your head looking up at him when he suddenly grabbed your face and kissed you. His body pushing you against the wall as you wrapped your arms around him. He knew he shouldn’t be doing this with what he knew but fuck, it was hard to ignore how much he wanted you. You let him kiss you as his lips trailed to your neck making you moan.

“God damn you, why couldn’t you just listen to me?” He whispered as his hands roamed down your body. His lips never leaving yours as you both fell onto the bed together removing one another’s clothing.

Sex with Negan was like nothing you had felt before. He was passionate yet dominating, his hands holding your hands down as he nibbled on your earlobe. Your body ached to feel him closer, closing your legs around him tightly, Negan swore right then and there he would cum. Each touch sending shivers through your body, you had wanted this for so long.

Once he finished you could feel his heart racing against your chest, his panting against your ear.

“Fuck” he suddenly uttered but his tone confused you. It wasn’t a curse of satisfaction, it almost sounded like regret.

“What’s the matter?” You asked as he lifted his head to look down at you.

“Nothing, doll” but you could see it in his eyes.

“You didn’t want to do this?”

“Of course I fucking did” before you could say another word he kissed you gently. The guilt Negan felt in that moment he knew he deserved to feel.

He fucked up and there was no going back.

The thought eating up at him he abruptly stood up and began to get dressed.

“Where are you going?”

“I gotta go” was all he could say as you sat up.

“I’m in your room Negan. Where on earth could you be possibly going?”

“Look-“ he stopped to turn back to you as he buttoned his pants.

“I’ll be back alright. Just give me a damn minute” he walked out leaving you in his bed confused and upset all over again.

Deciding to leave his room, you didn’t care if he was coming back. It wasn’t fair for him to continue acting this way without any proper explanation. Heading to your room you locked the door and got into bed, you had enough for the day.

Once Negan returned to his room, he was disappointed but not surprised to find you had left. He looked at his bed and cursed at himself, throwing his jacket against the wall. Negan hated his past and now it had come back to haunt him.

The next few days you went about your duties at the sanctuary helping clean up around the town.

A little over a week had passed and you hadn’t said a word to Negan, it angered you that he didn’t have a word to say himself. You stood on your side beginning to work as Negan was across from you in a baseball cap. You turned the opposite way, ignoring his presence he looked up at you and instantly tensed up.

Digging through the dirt to plant some crops you felt his eyes on you but you didn’t dare to look up.

“Cindy” hearing his voice unexpectedly caused you to freeze.

“Cindy..look at me” you could hear the regret in his voice, he knew he was wrong.

“Now you have something to say?” You looked up at him with hurt in your eyes.

“Look-“

“Look nothing. If you wanted to just fuck me you could’ve told me that, I’m not a little girl. But playing this whole game acting like you cared-“

“It wasn’t a game” he quickly defended himself.

“I wasn’t just trying to fuck you, that’s not what this is” he insisted.

“I don’t care what this is or was anymore. I’m over it” you lied as you reached in your bag.

“Here, you can take this gift back. Give it to the next woman you want to fool” you threw the book he gave you at his chest and walked away.

Tears streaming down your face, you hated that you had any feelings towards him. Wiping them away you ran into one of the leaders who expressed there would be a new group that would be joining.

A man, a boy and two women.

You were asked to prepare spare rooms and did as you were told happily to distract yourself.

A few hours later you were told the new comers had arrived, it being your job to show them the town and their rooms you waited by the gates when a very familiar face came out of the car. The sun in your eyes you placed your hand over your brows when the woman looked back at you making direct contact.

“M-Maggie?” You whispered in shock before realizing a young boy stood before her. You hadnt seen Hershel since he was four.

“Cindy” she ran to you with Hershel as tears welled up in both your eyes.

The two of you had so much to catch up on. So distracted with Maggie and Hershel you hadn’t thought of Negan. Hershel colored on the floor as Maggie and you sat at the table in your bedroom having a drink when you heard a sudden knock. You sighed as you stood up and opened the door to see it was Negan. Maggie’s cup slipped right from her hands as she stood in shock with who was before her.

“What the hell is he doing here?” You looked at Maggie confused.

“You know him?”

“Cindy get away from him” She responded, her eyes never leaving Negan.

“Maggie what is it?” You looked at her confused before looking back at Negan. Shock and guilt in his eyes as he looked down at you.

“Cindy-“ he took a step towards you.

“You back away from her now” Maggie interrupted.

“What the hell is going on?!” You looked back at Maggie. Anger like you had never seen before, rage in her eyes as she stood with her hands balled into fists at her sides.

“You didn’t think to tell her about Glenn, did you?” Her words making your heart skip a beat.

“Glenn?” You whispered as your eyes met Negans.

With just that look you knew…

“It was you..” you felt as if you couldn’t move, your chest felt tight as you placed your hand over your heart looking away. You felt numb, this couldn’t be it, could it? The man who had feelings for being your brothers killer?

“Cindy..” you looked up at him to see eyes of defeat.

“You knew..” you whispered.

“No…no I didn’t know until you mentioned him-“

“Don’t believe a word he says, it’s all apart of his sick game.” Maggie rushed behind you. Negan wouldn’t take his eyes off you.

“Cindy I swear I didn’t know at first”

“That’s why you acted like that after I mentioned him” you chuckled sarcastically in disbelief.

“I slept with you and….and you-“ covering your lips in disgust you shook your head. You couldn’t believe yourself.

You couldn’t believe him.

As shock subsided an anger like you had never felt before grew inside you. Anger that burned in the pit of your stomach, anger you couldn’t control you suddenly looked up and with both fists shoved Negan back.

“Get out!” He stumbled a step back with the same look of guilt.

“Cindy-“

“You heard her-“ Maggie stood in front of you blocking Negans view of you. He looked down at Maggie taking a deep breath before she slammed the door in his face.

Turning to find Hershel watching all that had just occurred, Maggie pulled you to the corner of the room as you began to cry. Negan could hear your cries standing just outside the door.

Disappointed in himself was an understatement..

“I trusted him Maggie, I trusted him!” You angrily whispered.

“You didn’t know” she attempted to comfort you.

“But he did…how could he be so…-“

“Evil? I’ve asked myself everyday“ Maggie placed her back pack on.

“Tomorrow we’ll talk to the leaders here and they’ll have him removed and I’ll be outside waiting for him” she explained making you raise a brow.

“Waiting for him for what?”

Maggie stopped in her tracks, looking up at you as if she expected you to know.

“Cindy…I’m not letting him get away again.”

“So you’re gonna kill him?” You whispered.

“Of course. It’s been too long-“

“But Maggie-“

“He killed your brother, don’t tell me you’re having an ounce of sympathy for this monster.” She quickly snapped. The truth was, you were angry, you were hurt, a part of you wanted to attack him yourself but…a tiny piece of you couldn’t simply shut off the feelings you had for him.

God you wish you could.

“What, you wanna let your brothers killer walk?”

“I know-“ you caught yourself getting loud and composed yourself.

“I know he killed my brother, Maggie. You don’t have to keep emphasizing that and I’m not saying to let him walk”

“Then what are you saying, because the look in your eyes is telling me your not in this and this ain’t right coming from you. You shouldn't second guess anything.” You rubbed your face in frustration not knowing what the hell to say.

“I don’t know dammit,”

“Well when you decide whether you want to stand for your brother or not you let me know.” She turned away from you as if you were no longer in the room. Angrily you walked out slamming the door and headed to your room.

This couldn’t be real, a man who you were sharing laughs with, time with…a man you grew to care for..he was responsible for Glenn’s death. The book Negan gifted you sitting on your nightstand, you threw it across the room when you heard a knock. You sighed, the last thing you wanted was to hear anymore lectures from Maggie.

“Maggie I already told you-“ you opened the door stunned to see Negan. Your lips parted in shock before you abruptly tried to slam the door shut just as he stopped it with his boot.

“Get out!” You screamed slamming the door again as he pushed it back with his hands.

“I just want to talk god dammit!”

“So you force yourself into my room” you backed away from the door as he let himself in.

“The only time I can actually talk to you with out your-“

“My brothers wife?”

Negan took a deep breath with furrowed brows.

“Look, you have every reason to never want to see me again but I only found out after I gave you the book.”

“And you still slept with me…knowing..” your voice shook in anger.

“Nothing can change what I did seven years ago but I promise you I’m not that man anymore, my feelings for you are real if it counts for anything. I know you don’t want to see me, I just needed you to know I’m sorry even if you never forgive me. I never meant to hurt you, Cindy.”

“Too late for that.” You whispered looking away.

“Cindy-“

“Get out Negan” your voice was calm but he knew you meant it. Without saying another word Negan turned to leave, opening the door you were both surprised to see Maggie standing on the other end.

“Magg-“

“I see you’ve made you decision, Cindy” Maggie ignored Negan before her looking at you in the back of the room.

“I haven’t made any decision, Maggie”

“Oh, it’s clear you have” she turned to Negan.

“And it’s a shame you let a monster manipulate you over your own brother.”

“That is not true!” You began to get upset walking towards the door but Negan didn’t move, standing between you both hearing what Maggie had to say.

“Oh yes it is. You should be ashamed of yourself, you don’t even know this man…God knows how youll end up if you stay with him-“

“What the hell is that suppose to mean?” Negan stepped forward tilting his head but Maggie stood her ground.

“Oh please-“ she began to laugh sarcastically.

“She’s in for misery and suffering if she stays with you, we’ve all seen what you’re capable of.”

“You think I’d hurt her?” He furrowed his brows.

Maggie silently shrugged her shoulders.

“You just better hope she’s not in the crossfire when I get to dealing with you because I won’t care who I have to get through to hurt you.”

Negan squinted his eyes staring down at Maggie, another step towards her.

“And you think I’d allow that to happen?”

You stood silently behind him hearing what was said.

Maggie didn’t respond, rolling her eyes she turned away and walked back to her room. Negan turned to you as you looked away.

“You can leave” you almost struggled to say…clearly apart of you not feeling this way. Negan didn’t fight your request.