Ned Donovan

Thank you Katrina, and congrats on your unbelievably deserved Tony award.

I’m very sad about the #BostonCeltics, but I would like to talk to you about the hilarity that was customs. Setup to this story: @crystalarnette and I bought a bag of mini peppers and garlic hummus in Canada. We carried it around today on our last day as a snack but did not ever end up eating them. I went to the airport with them, with the intention of eating them at the gate. I also did not do that. So I was gonna throw them away before my flight. Didn’t do that because I got bumped onto an earlier flight and forgot. I was filling out my customs card and realized I officially had Canadian food to declare. Specifically 6 and a half (I bit one) mini peppers from Canada and a half eaten thing of Garlic Hummus. First checkpoint: Customs Officer: anything to declare?” Me: yeah, a small bag of mini peppers and a half eaten thing of garlic hummus. CO: mini peppers? Me: yes. CO: what is that? Me: they’re small peppers CO: ok....and what was the other thing? Me: An open thing of garlic hummus. CO: For what? Me: Eating? CO: do you have utensils? Me: ..........I dip the peppers in them CO: uncooked peppers? Me: .....yes. CO: ok. Just make sure you declare them at the next station. Round two, here we go. Get to the declaration point. Customs Officer #2: (scans my mobile app) what do you have to declare? Me: A small bag of mini peppers and a half eaten thing of garlic hummus. CO: did you say teeny peppers? Me: I didn’t, but that’s close enough. CO: Ok. And hummus? Me: garlic hummus, yes. CO: oh. I didn’t realize they had peppers in Canada. Me: ..... CO: what’s the hummus for? Me: eating? CO: right. Hummus. That makes sense. You can go, you’re allowed to have peppers from hummus. I mean Canada. [Scene] I have officially made it to Newark with my confusing peppers.

Seems legit. I texted. Will report back.

I’ve walked by eight kids carrying swords in the last block and a half. So either there is a fencing convention, or the children have started their revolt

- random complaint heard on the streets of NYC

I write about sports for The Turf, but our whole site and team is rooted in the arts community. So last week when the NYC theatre community went into an uproar, I was asked to write about it. Here’s a deep dive into the Actor’s Equity Association’s renaming of The Gypsy Robe

Who do you have winning it all? I have Early Charlemagne defeating Dr. Narwhals Mating in a closely contested race. But I wanna give a shoutout to Tuna Altuna.