Nash

Will I be alone forever? Probably.

Really wanna get railed by a girl with a strap right now fml

Time for a middle of the night confession. I read fics, and usually I tend to stay away from any fics that involve FTM transgender characters because I get fucking panicky and anxious as fuck because damn I relate sometimes to some of the things they seem to go through (thank you to all the trans writers out there honestly I love y’all so much) and I wonder… is it gender dysphoria? Like… I wouldn’t mind getting top surgery at all and I’ve actively thoughts about it. Even just a reduction. I fucking hate my chest, it hinders me from wearing half the shit I want. I dress kinda boyish/masc sometimes and it feels good (like really good) but other times I like being pretty and feminine. I don’t try to think too fucking hard about it but I read a fic with a FTM trans character and I’m just like fuck my life why did I do this to myself I’ll be overthinking for a while about this. I always say I’m probably non-binary but like I don’t read too into but like. Maybe I am? I dunno. Hence why this is going into the tumblr void. Maybe someone else gets what I’m feeling? I don’t know. I’m done now I think. Maybe I’ll try to get some sleep.