N A R R A T I V E

I would also like to talk about the roses and irises on Hayley’s western wear. Love how she’s embracing all she’s learned and still giving her solo era ~flowers~

In honor of @paramore releasing their 6th album, please enjoy these blurry photos from Warped Tour 2008 when I saw them for the first time.

Envisioning. 

@taylorswift

I think about how much I miss live music everyday. I think about how I made so many plans to see my tried and true artists that I know I love who are touring new music like Lizzo and LPX and Hayley Williams. I think about how excited I was to experience artists I’ve loved for a while but never seen before like Glass Animals and Lennon Stella and Vampire Weekend and Megan Thee Stallion and Harry Styles (whom I’ve fallen so far down the rabbit hole for this year, especially during this pandemic). I was supposed to go to my second Bonnaroo. I was going to see shows in Boston, LA, Brooklyn, and other cities across the country.

I think about all the music that has come out during quarantine and I pray with all my might that I’ll be able to see the artists tour the art they‘ve created when we learn how to safely gather. I pray their livelihoods are not irrevocably dismantled. I pray that all the bands and crews and venue workers and producers and all other entities of the live music industry can survive in their industry.

This photo is from one of the last concerts I went to before Houston shut down. The band Joseph is consistently pristine and magical. I’ve seen them 5 times now, and I still can’t make it through one of their sets without crying and losing my cool over their harmonies and chemistry. They did a live stream during the first or second week of lock down, and I’ll forever cherish that glimpse into their casual selves as sisters and kitchen performers. Brandi Carlile also did an incredible series where she played some of her albums through completely with her band who, blessedly, all live on the same property and could all safely play together.

These live-streams are keeping me sane, but I wonder how long that will work before I need real concerts again for my well-being.

Here’s a link to one of Joseph’s performances from home. Be blessed by their spirit and sound.

A friendly reminder to myself and others to celebrate the better days when they come. Because they will always come.

Quarantine has asked much of me. Much of my mind, my body, my spirit. I’ve been wrestling with everything I hold true, and for once I don’t feel guilty about the questioning. I’m learning. And deconstructing. And rebuilding. And thinking. I’m getting to know myself as an adult without rigid confinements or a common group worldview. And, truly, I’m falling in love with the person I am and with the person I want to become.

At first, the deconstruction felt like unraveling. Frankly, it still does sometimes. But all the breaking and digging and the reframing look an awful lot like growth.

So.

I’ve returned to Tumblr as a favor to myself. I’m always inspired by the creativity here, and if I’ve learned anything in the last six months, it’s that surrounding yourself with the things you want to emulate works a lot more than sitting alone in your imagination, hoping you’ll learn and move and change some day. I have ideas. I have dreams. I have hope, and I’m planning my actions so that hope cannot turn into regret. I am in process, in progress. I’m taking these threads and making something old and new and good and honest and me.

This photo is from the last “normal” trip I got to take before the pandemic reached us. I turned 26 and I celebrated with my family in Texas Wine Country. I was inspired by the world within each bulb. One strand, different perspectives, unique light.