this tank top keeps me awake at nights
[cr.movewithsope]

Kiana Khansmith
sheepfilms
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

oozey mess
hello vonnie

izzy's playlists!
One Nice Bug Per Day
RMH

@theartofmadeline
almost home
Cosimo Galluzzi
AnasAbdin
Peter Solarz

if i look back, i am lost
Show & Tell

#extradirty

Kaledo Art

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@namjooniverse
this tank top keeps me awake at nights
[cr.movewithsope]

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WHAT'S HIS PROBLEM
[cr.movewithsope]
Just two guys out here thrusting at each other, you know how it be 😏🫣
you say the nastiest shit in bed and it’s fuckin awesome (nuts, pt 4) | k.nj
ᝰ nuts masterlist
rating/genre: angst, no fluff, smut. takes place in new york city. idol! namjoon, event planner! reader. nine year age gap, namjoon is an asshole, hanna has commitment issues.
summary: “hey, i’m in new york. can i come over? cuz we’re not over. call me back, hanna.”
warnings: sexual themes, MINORS DNI! 18+, angst, like a lot. no fluff at all. explicit & descriptive smut, hard dom namjoon, age gap & size kink, unprotected sex, soo much dirty talk, cigarettes, dumbification… lmk if i forgot something
word count: 2k
two years later
early april,
namjoons pov
my fingers hover over the keyboard, nervous as to what ill say to her. we’ve been calling each other every week consistently, every week we stay on the phone for hours to catch up. or sometimes we’ll be in the same city or i’ll go to her on my days off. we cross paths more often than i thought we would at first, it always goes like this: we see each other, we feel everything we felt the first time, fuck all day and all night, then i leave.
there’s nothing more to it even though i crave more. so i’m not sure how i can tell her this over text, much less on the phone. what would i even say? “oh hey, i met another girl. bye, lol”.
any way i put it is terrible, “hey so i know i told you i loved you but i met another girl but i still love you and i wanted you to know”
i type and delete everything, repeating this cycle for a while. staring down at my phone won’t help me figure out what to say. i never meant for all of this to happen the way it did, the fact we never became more than fuck buddies.
on paper, that’s all we are, but our relationship goes deeper than that. she’s my soulmate and everyone seems to know this except for her, and maybe that’s my fault but even during the late nights that bleed into mornings, the ones where she’s at whatever hotel we’re staying at, i’m holding her as the sun comes up and for just a split second, i feel as if she’s mine. the nights where we stay out on the balcony, smoking cigarettes, watching each other breathe. the mornings where i’m buried inside of her so deep, i dream about our future together.
and hope i’ll never wake up.
i decide to call her, knowing she won’t text me back. we haven’t talked since january, yet im stupid enough to think she still loves me, stupid enough to feel like i owe her an explanation to who im seeing.
i let the line ring three times before i give up and send her a voicemail,
“hey, i’m in new york. can i come over? cuz we’re not over. call me back, hanna.”
two months earlier
late january,
hanna’s pov
he’s been distant for a long time, not calling me or texting me as much. granted, i don’t do any of these things either, but he’s usually the one who reaches out first, maybe he got tired of me?
it’s almost been six years since we first met, almost two since we reunited. we both thought we’d be dating, hell, even married by now. but we both get in our own way too much.
we have our moments, ones where he’s in whatever city i’m in and we roleplay what life would be like together: me making us breakfast, him playing with kiwi… but then he gets on a plane and leaves, never addressing what we are.
i don’t think either of us meant for this back and forth to happen, we both wanted something with each other. we both feel what the other feels, but never at the same time. one day i love him and he hates me, the next we both hate each other, then we’re indifferent.
i stare at our text messages, filled with love and years of yearning for a man i can never allow to love me.
why would i? it’ll only hurt me in the end. the last time i saw him was two weeks ago, we were both in boston. we felt stale, like our spark had burnt out. but that’s not how i felt towards him, i still felt a burning love for him, but seeing him was like pouring water over a match.
what a tricky thing love is, and i can say for sure that i love him. i mean, what is love if not this? he has made me feel emotions stronger than anything ive ever felt. yet, ill never hold him down, and he’ll never hold me down. we fuck, he tells me all these things that i don’t let sink in, calls me, tells me loves me.
disappears.
part of me agrees that this is partially my fault, maybe if i believed all the sweet nothings he whispered in my ears, if i believed he loved me instead of avoiding ever accepting it.
this feels like self sabotage, and only now am i figuring that out. i never accepted his love, even though he kept saying it, time and time again.
i didn’t believe it and he quit on me.
*flashback to two weeks earlier*
namjoon was in boston, i drove out to see him. he was being so weird towards me, not his usual way; where he treats me like i’m his own personal princess and does anything and everything to take care of me. he was being dry, hateful almost.
i felt like he didn’t want me around, so i said “you know, if you don’t want me here you could’ve just said so…”
he gave me a side eye, no man has ever made me feel like i was a nuisance just for breathing next to them, yet he was making me feel that. in fact, he’s been making me feel this way for a while now.
i get up to leave, he doesn’t try and stop me. i open the door, he doesn’t try and stop me. i make it halfway down the hallway before i stop myself, the déjà vu coming back to me. almost six years ago, i didn’t know his name and he never tried finding out. i left him and he let me go, i need to change this pattern.
i turn around and knock on his door, i can tell he was waiting by it because he opens it the second my fist connects with the wood.
he tries pulling me in for a hug, like he usually does when he knows he fucked up with me. like he usually does when he knows he should’ve done something, but didn’t. but i dodge it, saying “no one has ever made me feel as terrible as you have…” letting myself slip a tear out, “…yet i still come back to you.”
it’s a blur from then; he’s buried unbelievably deep in me. it’s been a really long time since we’ve been together, like really together. he fucks me as if he’s been making up for lost time.
“joonie, you’re really deep”
i feel him twitch inside of me before he starts mumbling something i can’t understand,
“neoleul neomu joh-ahaeseo jug-eul geos gat-a”
his head is so in the clouds, he’s spitting out korean.
“jagi, you’re always so good to me. this pussy’s always so good to me”
i hook my legs around his waist, pushing him deeper in me. but i guess he doesn’t want that, grabbing the back of my knees and pressing my thighs to my chest. “oh fuck that’s deep” i say,
“neu-kkim jo-a?” he groans out, on top of me, hair sticking to his forehead, “dangsin-eun naleul wihae taeeonass-eoyo”
dazed and fucked stupid, i let him pound into me however he wants. i let him do anything he wants to me because i know im starting to lose him.
*flashback over*
early april,
hanna’s pov
that night never leaves my mind, even months later. the bitter boston cold, the sweetest he’s been to me. but i decided i’ve made up my mind when i went out for drinks with my closest girl friend. confiding in her about namjoon, how uncertain we are and how tired i am of it all. having had this same dilemma for the last two years, i kept saying “fuck him, i hate him”,
but this night was different, she said something that hit me like a brick:
“when are you gonna say “fuck him, i hate him” and actually be over with it?”
when i get home, i let the tears slip out. i let what she said echo in my head. i cry in my empty apartment, i cry for hours and no one’s there to hold me when i eventually fall asleep.
-
“hey, i’m in new york. can i come over? cuz we’re not over. call me back, hanna.”
he’s the first thing in my voicemails when i wake up, i knew he wouldn’t leave me alone after i cut contact and he was in my city. i was more of a mess than i let on, i should’ve let myself be loved, but the sad truth is: he didn’t deserve to break down every inch of me.
the hours go by, i do nothing. i know letting myself be sad is good to let it all out, but i just feel like im admitting defeat.
me and kiwi are laying on my couch, watching sex and the city for the fifth time when i hear a knock.
namjoons pov
i knock on her door, thinking she’ll ignore me. i deserve it after all. i stand there for half an hour, literally stand, tears pouring out of me in a pace i didn’t know tears could flow at. i let my head fall, knocking on her door again.
i hear her voice, muffled by the door, choking out a sob before saying, “we’re just star crossed lovers, namjoon. like ships in the night.”
i sigh, palm open against her door. breathing out, “you know i hate metaphors”
i can almost hear her rolling her eyes. i whisper, “please, hanna. let me in”
not necessarily talking about her apartment.
a while goes by, she doesn’t let me in. i go to sit at the bottom of her stairs, unwilling to accept that we’re over. i hear pawing at the door, i hear kiwi’s meows. the life i could’ve had with her flashes through my mind. i get up to knock on her door one more time,
she’s standing at the top of the stairs, so quiet i barely heard her. i make my way up, stopping on the steps before i reach her, our height equaled out by the steps. it’s hard to keep eye contact with her and not want to drop my relationship, but we don’t work out; we never will.
“i love you, namjoon…” she says, cutting the tension, “…if you say the word, if you tell me you want to be with me, i’ll say yes.”
i look at the ground, past her legs, down to mine. i hold both the railings by the stairs, taking everything in me to build the courage to tell her.
“i love you, joon” a sob escapes her. i make eye contact, seeing her trying to hold back tears.
“i do, too” i whisper, grabbing her waist while putting my head between her chest. my own tears stopped, but the emotion coursing through my veins is sending adrenaline straight into my heart.
i can tell she has so much to say, but nothing comes out. and what i have to tell her will break her. but what’s the point of going back and forth like this all the time?
“hanna…” i breathe out, taking my hands off her, “…i’m seeing someone else”
i can hear the weight of her heart drop to the floor, color drained from her face. she doesn’t have anything to say to me, not that i expected her to.
she doesn’t say anything, just turns around, walking back to her apartment.
this time, i’m the one left out in the hallway, except i know if i knock on her door she won’t let me back in.
-
as im walking down her stairs i begin to hear the sounds of a thunderstorm, its dark and gloomy out there, but i go out anyway.
stepping out in the pouring rain, i get soaked down to my bones. this doesn’t wash away anything, though, i still feel every thing ive ever felt for her.
i walk all the way back to my own hotel, no one bothered me, no one came up to me.
and when i get to my room, i forgot my key.
my heart aches because the fact i forgot my key isn’t an issue.
i raise my hand to knock on my own door,
the woman i left the love of my life for opens it.
a/n : the end! hope this made some of you cry
here’s a playlist:
𝄞 come over - bts
𝄞 music to watch boys to - lana del rey
𝄞 closer - rm
𝄞 star shopping - lil peep
𝄞 falling asleep on a stranger - pierce the veil
𝄞 paper hearts (jungkooks version) - tori kelly
𝄞 heartbeat - childish gambino
and this is what joonie said ;)
“neoleul neomu joh-ahaeseo jug-eul geos gat-a”
“i like you so much i might die”
“neu-kkim jo-a?”
“do you like how this feels?”
“neolang haneun geo jeongmal joh-a”
“i love being with you”
taglist
@bktherulaswifey @bunnyluvrtam @strangetoadroadbat @wh3r3isnana @shadylamppsychicdeputy @jinandnamjoonsfavgirl @therenaissanceoftime @fandom-taylor @willowpains @zlynxii @Indaaaaaaa @exxplOsiOn @fluffysheepmaster @i-bitch-you-bitch @isskjsislol @louxmclll @kentoluvrr @hrtdOlliez24 @nammies-girl @exactlycoralfox @talyaaas-blog @hummusxx
if you would like to be removed from the taglist, personally message me or drop a comment down saying u wanna be removed!
Feral • KNJ
when you don't know there's a man out there who is obsessed with every breath you take and that man happens to be your professor.
Pairing : Stalker! Namjoon x student! Reader
Genre : stalking au, smut, 18+.
Warning: this one shot is very unhinged and toxic. Some people might feel uncomfortable while reading it. It is purely a stalking and dark obsession without any feelings and romance.
(not proofread at the end)
• • • •
It all began the moment you walked into his lecture hall.
There was an effortless, intoxicating defiance in the way you carried yourself, clad in a fitted black leather mini skirt, a crisp white button-down shirt with the top few buttons casually undone, and your hair falling in soft, untamed waves around your shoulders.
The moment Kim Namjoon looked up from his podium, the air left his lungs. A sudden, dangerous heat coiled tight and heavy in his lower abdomen, sending a jolt straight through his veins.
It was instant. There was something magnetic about you, an unspoken pull he couldn't quite name, but one that instantly shattered his professional composure.
You were his student. A forbidden line he knew he shouldn't even dream of crossing. Yet, the universe seemed to shrink until you were the only one that mattered.
Day by day, the attraction turned into a quiet, consuming obsession. Namjoon found himself engineering ways to keep you within arm's reach.
"Step up to the board and solve this equation for us," he would command, his deep, baritone voice velvety smooth yet leaving no room for argument. He just wanted an excuse to watch you walk, to see the way your brow furrowed in concentration, to breathe in the faint scent of your perfume as you passed his desk. Under the guise of academic guidance, he ensured your seat was always in the very front row, right where his eyes could track your every move.
But the obsession didn't stop when the lecture ended.
From the shadows of the university courtyard, his dark gaze would follow you. He watched the way your lips parted when you laughed, the animated way you gestured while eating lunch with your friends. It was mesmerizing—until they showed up.
Whenever another male student stepped too close to you, or made you laugh a little too brightly, something raw and primal would snap inside Namjoon's chest. A burning, toxic possessiveness would take over.
He couldn't touch you out in the open, but he held all the power in the classroom. The very next day, those same boys would bear the brunt of his silent fury. Namjoon would target them mercilessly, ripping their presentations to shreds, calling them out on the slightest errors, and turning his grading into a psychological battlefield.
They had no idea what they had done wrong. But Namjoon knew. They had dared to look at what was silently, irrevocably becoming his.
The heavy oak door of his office clicked shut behind you, cutting off the bustling noise of the university corridor. You stepped inside with an easy, casual confidence, entirely used to the soft smiles and subtle favoritism he usually reserved just for you.
"Mr. Kim, good afternoon," you greeted him, offering a polite smile. "I heard you called for me?"
Normally, his expression would soften at the sound of your voice. But today, the atmosphere in the room was suffocatingly tense. Namjoon sat behind his sleek desk, his jaw clenched so tightly a muscle ticked in his cheek. He was radiating a cold, dangerous fury, a dark energy fueled by the sight that had nearly unhinged him earlier that morning: you, pressed against a wall in the campus courtyard, openly kissing another boy.
Slowly, his dark eyes slid up to meet yours, devoid of their usual warmth.
"Yes," he said, his voice dangerously low as he slid a stack of papers across the desk. "I checked your recent assignment." He flipped open the folder, revealing your previous mock test papers. Prominently stamped across the top in aggressive red ink was a single word.
Failed.
Your breath caught in your throat, the easy smile instantly vanishing from your face. "S-Sir?"
"You failed the exam, Y/N," he stated flatly, leaning back in his leather chair, weaving his long fingers together. His gaze bored into yours, sharp and unyielding. "Have you been... otherwise occupied lately?"
"No... sir," you stammered, your heart hammering against your ribs. "I worked hard. I studied for days..."
"Working hard doesn't mean your answers are correct, dumb girl."
The harsh, derogatory words cut through the silence, making your cheeks instantly burn with a mixture of shame and shock. He had never spoken to you like this.
Before you could process the sting of his words, Namjoon stood up. His massive, broad-shouldered frame loomed over you, completely stealing the light in the room as he stepped around the desk. He closed the distance between you until you were forced to tilt your head back just to look at him.
Without warning, his large hand reached out. His thumb and forefinger pinched your cheek—not painfully, but firmly enough to completely trap you under his touch.
Your breath utterly left your lungs, your eyes widening at the sudden, intimate contact.
"You need tutoring badly, girl," he whispered, leaning down so his warm breath fanned across your overheated skin. The dark, possessive glint in his eyes told a completely different story than his words.
You swallowed hard, your voice barely audible. "I... I will try my best to improve, sir."
"No, no," Namjoon murmured, a slow, predatory smirk playing at the corner of his lips as his fingers trailed down your jawline before dropping away. "I will make absolutely sure you do. Tonight, I am going to tutor you. At your place."
A shiver ran straight down your spine. You gulped, but under the sheer weight of his intense gaze, you found yourself nodding. Getting personal, one-on-one tuition from Kim Namjoon was supposed to be an academic blessing, he was, after all, the most respected, brilliant, and undeniably breathtaking professor on campus.
The heavy rain of the evening drummed a steady rhythm against the glass of your small apartment. It was a cozy, compact space, just enough room for one person, which made Kim Namjoon’s towering presence feel incredibly loud the moment he stepped inside.
"Make yourself comfortable, sir," you said politely, trying to shake off the nervous flutter in your chest. "I’ll get us something cold to drink."
"Thank you, Y/N," he replied, his deep voice smooth as his eyes scanned the perimeter of your living space, taking in every detail of where you lived your life away from him.
A few minutes later, you were both settled in your bedroom, which served as your study space. Namjoon sat in the desk chair while you pulled up a smaller stool beside him. Despite the underlying tension from earlier that day, he was a brilliant educator.
As he broke down the complex concepts, you found yourself listening with genuine interest. You had to pass this class at all costs, and his explanations were flawless.
"So, tell me," he murmured, leaning back in the chair and crossing one long leg over the other, tapping a pen against the desk. "What’s the answer to this one?"
You pulled the notepad closer, focusing hard as you scribbled down the steps to solve the equation. You tapped the final number with your pen, looking up at him hopefully.
Namjoon leaned in, looking at your paper, and a low hum vibrated in his chest. "Dummy," he chided softly. His voice wasn't harsh like it had been in his office; it was gentle, yet carried a thick, heavy layer of possessiveness that made your skin prickle. "That's not how you solve it at all."
As you leaned forward to re-examine your work, Namjoon’s hand deliberately shifted. With a seamless, practiced motion, his fingers brushed against the glass of juice you had brought him. The glass tilted slowly, pouring the dark liquid directly onto your lap, soaking straight through your pants.
"Ah, shit!" you gasped, instantly standing up as the cold fabric clung to your skin.
"Oh, I am so sorry," Namjoon apologized immediately, his expression a perfect picture of accidental carelessness. He reached for a tissue, but the damage was done. "It slipped. Completely my fault."
"It's okay, sir. I'll... I'll just go to the bathroom and change into something dry," you said, gesturing toward the door.
He nodded smoothly. "Of course. Take your time."
The moment the bathroom door clicked shut and the sound of rustling clothes began, the apologetic look vanished from Namjoon’s face. His expression went entirely blank, cold, and calculated.
Slipping his hand into his coat pocket, he pulled out a small, high-definition hidden camera.
With silent, hurried steps, he moved across your bedroom. His eyes locked onto your bookshelf, scanning the titles until they landed on a row of plushie toys.
He deftly wedged the tiny camera between two stuffed animals, adjusting the lens with a practiced tilt until it pointed directly at the center of your bed. Satisfied, he stepped back, ensuring it was completely invisible to the naked eye, and slipped back into his chair just as you walked back in wearing fresh sweatpants.
For the next hour, the lesson continued. True to his word, he kept his focus on the textbook, pulling your attention entirely into the academics until you forgot all about the spilled drink.
Finally, Namjoon closed the textbook with a soft thud and cleared his throat. "I need to use the washroom before I head out."
"Sure, sir. It's right there in the corner," you pointed toward the left side of the hallway.
"Thank you."
Namjoon walked into the small bathroom, shutting the door behind him. The air inside still smelled faintly of your vanilla body wash, making a dark heat immediately creep into his veins. His eyes swept over the small space until they landed on the laundry basket in the corner.
Stepping forward, his fingers brushed past the top layers until he found a piece of your underwear. A heavy, dark sigh of contentment left his lips as he lifted the delicate fabric, pressing it against his nose, inhaling your scent deeply. His eyes closed for a brief, unhinged moment before he folded it tightly and pushed it deep into the inner pocket of his coat.
He washed his hands, checked his reflection in the mirror to ensure his composure was flawless, and walked back out into the bedroom.
"I think that's enough tutoring for today," Namjoon said, gathering his coat and looking down at you with a calm, unreadable smile. "I hope to see a significant improvement from now on, Y/N.”
A few days had passed and Namjoon would daily watch you through the camera. The way you would move. The way you would sleep. The way you would lay down and scroll through the phone. The way you would change your clothes after a shower and that would be the difficult one to watch. He would get hard instantly every morning as you change your clothes.
One day, he was watching you through a camera, his legs spread as he saw you lay on the bed while watching some movie on your laptop. You suddenly closed the laptop and then kicked your pants away.
Namjoon bit his lip, a sudden heat creeping up into his pants as he watched your hand slowly slide into your panties. He wished you to get rid of those panties and you did. Namjoon bought your panties and inhaled it as he watched you, finding some sort of closure.
He cupped himself as you threw your head back and rubbed your clit. Namjoon got rid of his cock, his pre-cum evident as he watched you slowly finger yourself. Fuck, this wasn't enough. He needs more.
At midnight, when he saw you were sleeping. He climbed through your house window and watched you sleep for hours. And then a small moan escaped your mouth in sleep.
Namjoon lost it.
He slowly pulled your duvet down, exposing your naked body. He made sure to make so sound. He unzipped his pants and slowly rubbed his dick, while watching the movement of your chest falling, the peak of your nipples, the soft plumpy lips of yours.
He imagined them wrapped around his dick. He threw his head back. But then, he slowly took your underwear from the floor and wrapped it around his fist. He completely removed the duvet, you let out a small moan as the cold air hit your naked body but you slept anyway from the exhaustion.
He smirked, slowly patting your thighs and watched as your pussy glistened with wetness.
He sighed in content, running his tongue over and over his lips as he pumped his dick in fast speed to the view of your naked body.
He silently came all over his hand and he made sure to let some drop on your pussy before moving back, he took his mobile and clicked a picture of you, naked and spread, his cum on your pussy mixed with yours. He covered you back with duvet and whispered, "one fucking day I will fuck you hard."
A/n : Not a very plot driven one shot or smutty. I know this is very toxic and unhinged. I don't know what got into me to write this 😶🌫️

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Swapped- Yandere Kim Nam-Joon x Reader | Chapter 1
Kim Namjoon x Y/n | Slightest Kim Seok-Jin x reader if you squint
Genre: yandere au, business corporation au (ig?), romance
Synopsis:
Both the Kim and L/n families have been high earning conglomerates for years now, wanting to consolidate power and strengthen their alliance, decide to arrange their two heirs to marry. The oldest daughter, of twins, agrees to marry the Kim family’s heir, Kim Namjoon, but at the last minute backs out. Now, Y/n L/n must pretend to be her twin until her sister says so, but what happens when things feel too real? What happens when you find yourself falling into the role too well?
Word Count: 3,582
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 (Coming Soon)
_____
You grip at the paper envelope sent to your mailbox, hands slightly shaking– in anger? Anxiety? – you weren’t too sure. All you knew was that you hated this feeling.
To Y/n L/n, daughter of the L/n Family.
Hastily, you rip open the envelope, grabbing the card inside. Looking down at the printed words, you scoffed.
—
Dear Y/n, we welcome, and invite, you to the formal wedding of Ha- Yoon L/n and Kim Nam-Joon!
— May 19th, 20XX—
Seoul, South Korea., The Shilla Seoul – Yeong Bin Gwan
—
“Fucking hell. Ha-yoon’s getting married? How much did I miss?”
You run a hand through your hair as you try to grasp the situation. On one hand, you didn’t want to attend the wedding, but on the other, you knew it wasn’t as easy as saying “you didn’t want to attend”.
“For God’s sake”, you mumble, “I am already as busy as it is!”
It’s currently May 4th, 3 days till you submit your capstone project. You had already done your final presentation, as daunting as it was, so you were glad to be so close to the finishing line– without the help of your family.
You left South Korea at eighteen to attend college in the States, and while your parents were completely against the fact, you left. You packed your bags, and boarded a twelve hour flight to California. Was it a bad idea– maybe, but do you regret it? Nope!
You were finishing your master’s degree in Data Science at U.C. Berkley, at 25 years old, and once you graduated, you planned on settling down and finding a job in the states. You’ve grown to love the area! As a data scientist, you could work at home while earning a pretty good salary and keep to yourself.
I wouldn’t be able to do this much back at home.
Thinking back to it, you hated being at your old home. It felt uncomfortable to prance around like a “hoity-toity” family acting as if everything was perfect! You understood that you came from money though, and to say that your parents were well off was an understatement. They, along with your new in-laws, were the rich conglomerates.
Your main family included: you, your twin sister Ha-yoon, and your parents. Obviously, you’ve drifted apart from your family, but when you lived with them, it was tiring to say the least. Naturally, you were the introverted, awkward sister that lacked confidence, meanwhile, Ha-yoon exemplified the qualities expected from the daughter of such an “astound” company, and due to this, she’s closer to your parents, especially your mom.
Slowly, you slowly saw your sister develop into a snobby, whiny daughter in front of your parents, and as Ha-yoon grew up, you two drifted apart– your personalities clashed too much or as she said “you’re the jester and I’m the princess!”
Was she calling me ugly or something– Whatever that means I guess.
Ha-yoon and you were identical twins in the sense of “if you met them for the first time, you couldn’t tell the difference.” But, for the most part, no one really knew you two were twins; your mom made an effort to send you two to separate schools, based on interests she insisted on, but you never tried to think too hard about it.
Thinking back, while Ha-yoon was extremely smart, and held all the qualities to becoming a great heir, her unreliability and impulsivity causes you to question her choice of marriage. You remembered the time she was “in love” with one of your male classmates, pinning after him for a week, but after getting together with him, she quickly grew tired, breaking things off and moving on.
You didn’t want to have your doubts already, but you worried that this marriage would end up the same way. How your parents got Ha-yoon to agree to an arranged marriage, you're assuming, is beyond you.
Whatever, I’m not going to think too much about it. Anyways, I have better things to worry about. Such as– CRAP I FORGOT.
You jump back to your computer to finish working on your capstone project. This was going to have to wait for another day– I have to put myself first.
—————————————
A couple hours have passed, and you were finalizing your last page of your report, when you heard a faint *Buzz buzz* sound coming from your bed. Hastily, you picked up your phone, not expecting to see a text from an unknown number.
(Unknown #)
Unknown: Y/n, did you get the letter? -What the fuck? Who is this?? How do they know who I am?
Unknown: Y/n, this is your mother, once again, I am asking you, did you get the letter? The one to your sister's marriage.
How the fuck did she get my number? Your eyebrows furrowed, you quickly start typing.
Y/n: How did you get this number?
Y/n: I have had it changed for years now.
Mom: Come on, you aren’t stupid Y/n, you know something like this is easy for us.
Mom: Just answer my question.
Y/n: Yes I did get the invitation. Sorry. Can’t go.
Mom: I don’t think I was asking you; you will attend this wedding whether you like it or not. It is the least you could do for us after leaving.
… This is pissing me the fuck off
Y/n: I can’t just drop everything and run over, Mom.
Mom: Y/n L/n, you can and will.
Y/n: Mom- You don’t understand, I have my GRADUATION on May 19th! You know, to celebrate the degree I’ve worked towards for years? The one I need for my career? Mom: So? You never needed to go that route, and you know it. This is more important, both our family, and the Kims, will unite to become stronger. I have booked your flight for May 14th, 2026. As you know, the marriage will occur on May 15th.
Mom: The drivers will pick you up from the airport. Also, whatever you’re thinking, it won’t work. We have an image to upkeep. If not for me, do it for your sister.
At this point, I was shaking in anger. The absolute audacity she had. Booking everything previously without even telling you. Whatever, you thought, it’s not as if I’ll stay there. I’m still pissed about my graduation, but I know there’s no winning this one.
Y/n: Okay, I’ll go. Just don’t expect me to do or have any familial duties besides attending the marriage.
Mom: Good, here [file upload] this is your ticket information. See you then, Y/n.
Seen
—————————
UGH! I threw my phone back on my bed. Let me finish my work. I have better things to worry about. I’ll just come and go. Easy. Right?
— Timeskip to May 14th—
Walking from my plane, I look around the airport. It’s been a while since I’ve been at Incheon International Airport, and I certainly didn’t miss it. Tomorrow is your sister's big day, and you can’t help but dread it.
At the baggage claim, you grab your suitcase– you didn’t pack much, but you wanted to bring items back to the US.. maybe steal, for lack of a better word, a couple items.
You drag your suitcase to the entrance of the airport, and as soon as you are about to call a taxi, someone who works for your family– you assume, taps your shoulder.
“Ms. L/n, we have a car ready for you here,” the man speaks up. You sigh, but just follow the man, no need to make his life anymore difficult.
The drive to the hotel isn’t long, but it’s awkward. You tried making small talk with the man, but he just continued looking straight. Whatever, I’ll just sleep when I get home, and then call it a night. I’m jetlagged as a bitch right now.
--Time Skip to the Day of the Wedding--
Today is finally the day of Ha-yoon’s marriage. Let’s hope it goes well, for both her and my sake, you nervously look around your hotel room. Thankfully they had booked you in the same hotel as the marriage. You had to wake up pretty early to start getting ready– as per your mom’s request. Thankfully, the wedding wouldn’t have too many attendees, as the Kim family is pretty secretive, so you hoped the ceremony would just speed through.
Just as you were about to finish getting ready, a frantic knock echoed from your door.
“Y/n– we need you to go to the bridal’s room right away! It is an emergency!” an unfamiliar voice boomed.
Startled, you get up, racing to the door to be immediately dragged away by the worker. “What– What is happening? Hey! At least explain to me–,” you were flabbergasted, come on now!
Finally, after what seemed like eternity, the female stopped at the bridal’s room.
The door opened to a sobbing Ha-yoon in my mother’s arms. “B-But eomma! I change my mind! I don’t want to marry him! I don’t even know him– what if he’s some crazy psycho!,” Ha-yoon’s scratchy voice echoes throughout the room.
“Now, why the hell did they call me here as if I could do something? What do they need me here for,” you silently think to yourself, watching the whole fiasco go through.
Ha-yoon, bringing her head up from her mom’s arms, looks straight at you. “Y/n! Just the person I needed to see right now!,” Ha-yoon exclaims from the front of the room, “Hurry up! Come over here!”
You raise your eyebrows, slowly stepping towards Ha-yoon. Surprisingly, despite all her fussing, she looks gorgeous. Her wedding dress was, of course, white with a long trail spanning at least a couple yards, encrusted with tiny diamonds.
“Y/nnieee! My dearest twin sister who I shared the womb with!” Ew- what is happening? Why is she acting so– crazy?!
Y/n looked Ha-yoon straight in the eyes, her eyebrows furrowed, “Why are you acting this way, Ha-yoon? Didn’t you want to get married to this Kim guy??”
Ha-yoon quickly quiets down, her mood dimming immediately, “Tch– So what? Can’t we just call off this marriage? Eommaaa!”
Oh my God, she’s going to piss me off. Why would she marry someone she didn’t know? How did she even agree to an arranged marriage?
Your mom goes up to Ha-yoon, patting her back gently, “Ha-yoonnie, my dear daughter, you stated yourself you wanted to marry Namjoon. Why would you back out now? We need this for our reputation– for our company’s integrity!”
You stand there awkwardly, eyes darting between your sister and mother. Suddenly, Ha-yoon brings her head up from the ground, looking you into the eyes. “Y/n, I need you to do the greatest favor ever– Why don’t YOU pretend to be me for a little tiny~ bit,” she said, lightly batting her eyelashes.
What. The. Actual. Fuck. Did. She. Just. Ask. Me.
“What the fuck, Ha-yoon, are you joking?,” Y/n asks, her body stiffens as her mom narrowly looks at her.
“Y/n, don’t speak to your sister like that,” your mom says angrily. Turning her head to Ha-yoon, your mom’s eyes softened, “Look sweety, we can’t have you bail out on this; This is important.”
Ha-yoon grabs my hands, begging Y/n with all her might, “Please, just for a couple of months. Just enough time for me to find out the type of man Namjoon is!” You look at Ha-yoon dumbfounded, “So, you want to make sure that YOU’RE safe, huh? C’mon, why did you even invite me here anyways! I can’t just throw away everything to pretend to be some guy’s wife! My whole life is outside of Korea, and I am not willing to throw it all away for you Ha-yoon. I am not going to clean up your mess!”
“Y/n L/n,” a stern voice– coming from your mother you presume– calls out. “You abandon your family and ignore us for years! You’re overexaggerating! It’ll only be for a couple of months. Afterwards, we can just swap the two of you.”
You look at your mother, and the people around the room, as if they’re all crazy.
“Mom– you can’t be for real right now. He’s going to be able to tell I’m not Ha-yoon just from the rumors alone! Even if everything goes smoothly, how will it work once we magically “Swap”? Do you really think everything will magically return to normal? He will be able to tell her personality changes. Then, you should really be worried about our family’s image.”
Your mom scoffs,
“As if– At this point, no one even knows that Ha-yoon and you are sisters. I mean you’ve been in the states for six, seven years now doing God knows what.Ha-yoon and Namjoon haven’t even officially met before, so you’ll be fine. Look, Y/n, if you do us this favor, we’ll leave you alone. You can return to the states, and we won’t ever call you for anything again. We’ll even pay for your rent when you’re gone. Deal?”
You pause, not knowing how exactly to feel. On one hand I guess it’s sort of tempting, but on the other, this is just another mess that shouldn’t have happened.
Why should I have to be a clean-up crew for them? Whatever– fine I’ll fucking do this shit.
“... Fine– I’ll pretend to be you Ha-yoon..,” Ha-yoon’s eyes brighten up, and as soon as she speaks you cut her off, “But– you have to promise me. It’ll only be for a couple of months. Whatever mess that happens should NOT be my problem.”
“Oh my God, Y/nnie! Thank you so much! C’mon let’s get you into this dress! We need a hairdresser and make-up artist,” Ha-yoon yells at the staff, who now look twice as stressed as before.
Ha-yoon’s eyes narrow at your waist, “On a second thought, get her a different dress, this one won’t fit you.”
Ha. There it is, the Ha-yoon I remember; you’re the one who gave up the attention of the wedding to me, so why do you have the gall to act this way towards me. I’m doing YOU a favor. Whatever. There’s only 3 hours till the wedding, and at this point everyone was panicking looking for a dress.
————————
Somehow everything works out, and before you know it, you’re walking down the aisle, eyes finally meeting your soon-to-be beloved– yuck.
Honestly, he was really handsome– and did I mention tall? God– money really does buy you everything.
His eyes narrowed on your figure, as if he was examining some sort of game.
Finally, you stop in front of him to begin our vows. You decide to go through your vows first, regurgitating the words Ha-yoon wrote down for you to memorize. Thank God I have a decent memory.
Then, Namjoon says some stereotypical vows– presumably ones his parents forced him to learn, while looking me dead in the eye.
C’mon– look away please! I can’t handle all this scrutiny! Y/n stay composed– don’t let your confident demeanor, the one you were trying so hard to force, come unloose now!
Your thoughts are interrupted by the words, “You may now kiss the bride.”
Your body freezes in place, “Fuck, I forgot about this– whatever Y/n you’re a grown 25 year old woman, you’ve done more than kiss a man– grow some balls.”
“Ha-yoon,” a deep, smooth voice calls out your sister’s name, “may I?” You quickly push back your confusion, remembering you’re now technically Ha-yoon.
You nod slowly, as you both bring your heads closer. You could feel his breath against his lips, but the moment is ruined by him whispering, “Are you trying to act prude? Let’s just get this over with. It’s not like you planned to fall in love either.”
Before you could get a word out, he closes the gap, putting his hand behind your neck to hold you in place. The kiss was short– but deep. He refused to give you any resemblance of control– maybe to deter you from getting the wrong idea. This kiss was just something to give the intended message to the viewers, but you knew better.
When Namjoon pulls away, you are speechless. This has been a clusterfuck of a day– you just want to go home and sleep! You’d even prefer to go back, restart your capstone project, and act as if today never existed. Too bad for you I guess.
He quickly slides on a diamond encrusted ring, something to officially show that you are “each other's.”
Namjoon looks down at you expectantly for a couple seconds, and when you don’t budge, he whispers out “ring.”
Oh yeah– you grab his ring, sliding it onto his ring finger. It was a silver band, incrusted with small diamonds. Wow, his hands look nice– Y/n get your head out of the clouds.
Ha-yoon, you owe me big time, sister. These next couple of months will fly, and before you know it, you’ll be trapped in this marriage, not me.
You look towards the small crowd, making eye-contact with your mother who gives you a small, foxy smile as if to rub it in your face.
Your attention is snapped back to Namjoon as he speaks up, “Thank you all for attending this marriage between Ha-yoon and I. I hope that in the future, we can continue to unite and be kind to each other. Thank you.”
Going down the stairs, you try walking away, only to be stopped by Namjoon. “Ha-yoon? Where are you going?” He was eerily still as he saw your panicked eyes look from the door to his face.
You force yourself to look away from the door, finding his eyes immediately. Clearing your throat you utter, “I uh– I forgot something in my hotel room. I just need to get it real quick. I’ll be right back.”
Namjoon’s eyebrows slightly furrow, before asking, “Hotel? Why are you staying here? Don’t you live in Seoul?” He places one of his hands into his pant pocket, slightly leaning onto one leg before speaking up again, god you wish he would just let you go, “What? You can’t speak or what? I’ve heard how much you love talking from others. Am I the exception?”
“Look Namjoon, to answer your questions, I stayed at the hotel since it would take a while for me to get ready for the wedding. Secondly, why are you so calculative? It’s as if you’re trying to dissect every move I make.” Y/n states while maintaining eye-contact with Namjoon.
At this point, you were tired of Namjoon’s constant scrutiny; you didn’t even know the man for an hour at this point!
Namjoon looked at Y/n, mouth moving as if to say something but quickly acting against it. “Fine, go get whatever you need to get. We’re moving in together, remember? So make sure to bring whatever you need to our new house. Also, don’t forget, once you bring your stuff, we’re going straight to the airport. I have business to attend to in Japan, and we will also be spending our honeymoon there.”
You quickly nod and turn your back to Namjoon as you head to the door. “Okay, I’ll see you later!” You didn’t look back to see if he was still there. Your thoughts were racing.
What did he mean about the honeymoon!? I have to live with him in “OUR” house? Oh my God– what did Ha-yoon get me into? Okay, Y/n calm down. Let’s just go to our hotel room and take off our make-up and this fucking dress.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Back at your room, you lay deadly still on your bed. You still can’t conceptualize the fact that you’re now technically married– but not? You’re going to live for months with this man, and then after playing house for a while, go back home as if nothing happened?
“Ughhhhh," you groan into your palms while rolling around in your bed.
You had finished packing your bags already, so you were waiting for anything to happen. You feel your phone buzz from your bedstand.
You freeze for a couple of seconds, questioning whether to pick up the phone or not. Picking the safe option, you stay on the bed– just laying there, for what seems like forever.
*Buzz, Buzz*Okay, they’re unrelenting. Let me see my phone.
You push yourself upright and reach for your phone. Unknown: Hello, are you done? 9:38 PM
Unknown: This is Nam-joon, Ha-yoon. I will be waiting for you downstairs.
You should have had more than enough time to pack. 9:38 PM
Nam-joon: Ha-yoon? Where are you? It’s been ten minutes. 9:50 PM
Crap– I didn’t think zoned-out for that long. I’m screwed.
Nam-joon: Are you okay? 9:53 PM
Y/n: I am so sorry, Nam-joon! 9:55 PM
Y/n: I accidentally took a small nap; I will be downstairs asap with all my bags! 9:55 PM
Nam-joon: Okay. 9:55 PM
Nam-joon: It is late. Remember, we have a flight to catch in a couple of hours. 9:56 PM
You jump from your bed, grabbing your bags, ready to face your “husband.” You didn’t know how you would explain your “overpacking” since you literally came from the U.S., but whatever, you already became a bride overnight.
You had better things to worry about.
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Note: I decided to change the plot a bit from the "preview." I removed the subplot of the Jimin Bsf just because I thought it would be easier for plots sake.
I originally wanted to make this a oneshot, but I haven't had time to fully write everything out. I plan on making two more parts since there isn't really much interaction between Y/n and Namjoon so far🥹
Also sorry for the weird timeskips between the airport day and wedding day... Ik it's awkward, but I just wanted to post what I have right now... Also ignore grammar issues...
trust me (kim namjoon) [p. 1]
Summary; he thinks you cheated.
The clicks. The flashes piercing the eyeballs. The noises of the camera shuttering. The hard concrete against the soft base of his balenciagas. The crowd roared around him and yet, he could easily silence them in his mind. A beat, a lyric, a thought wasn’t necessary to do so. He had mastered the art of facing the truth to such a point where he didn’t feel the need to evade reality or bypass the questions that arouse in his mind all the time. He had answers already, or so he thought. The 25 year old had filled that void in his heart with stones, contagious stones. The epidemic spread, and soon enough every inch of his body which possessed even a bit of empathy or even sympathy, was indestructible. There was no going back.
-
“Great show tonight,” his manager’s voice echoed through the receiver as his landline began playing the voice messages left unheard, “I don’t understand why you’re beating yourself up on this, tonight was for celebration and you left right after the show!” he didn’t stay to hear rest of the message, effectively being able to predict the remainder and being in no mood for the constant assurance that did no good. He walked inside his room, throwing his backpack on the sofa as he walked towards the bed. His body collapsed as he ran his hand over his face, the mistakes amidst the performance dominating half of his mind and the other half repeatedly provoking him to have another breakdown whilst thinking of the way you brutally broke his fragile heart that took ages for him to trust you. Why would you? How could you? It was unimaginable for him to even for a split second consider someone as warm-hearted and considerate as you to take the remainder of what was left of his poor heart and clutch it strong enough for it to crack right apart from the places he had tried so hard to previously mend. Your pretentious persona always stabbed him whenever he thought of the moments you two shared, where you really had him fooled, convinced he was the only one, convinced you were never going to leave. And like every time, he didn’t realize when the tears even started falling because very soon, there were tiny pools of tears each side beside his face.
His throat felt dry at this point and he realized he had been laying in the same position for over an hour and silently crying. He needed water, he needed it for mere survival because his will to live was snatched away from him when he saw you exit from another idol’s makeup room, hair raveled while closing up the top button of your shirt, and he remembered the wiped off mascara and ruined lipstick like he had it tattooed on his heart. He doesn’t remember much after that incident from that horrendous day almost a month ago, apart from telling you to leave because he was through and many drinks after that.
“Namjoon,” your voice echoed in the lounge, stopping him in his tracks with his heart beating oh-so-rapidly and loudly in its ribcage that he missed out on what you said next. He wondered how long the phone was playing these messages for it to reach the ones sent almost 3 weeks ago. “You’re- you’re not picking up my calls nor replying to my texts.. Joonie, what should I do? What- what do you want me to do? I’m so confused,” the way your voice cracked did similar to his heart, and for once he wasn’t quick in walking away from the phone because this was the first time he had heard your voice since a few nights after the breakup, when you showed up at his door and he refused to open it. “at least tell me what I did. Tell me what happened, I will do anything to fix this. You- you can’t.. you can’t take such a big decision on behalf of both of us.. I won’t let you.” Your voice got thinner and thinner and he was having a hard time grasping your sentences now, because of the struggle you were facing in even just merely talking. “I love you, I still do. But I’m running out the mental capacity to think this through, and- and I’m beginning to believe you really did mean it when you said you’re sick of me. I don’t want to but it’s all I have.” His lips quivered when he heard you sob, his jaw clenched as he attempted to toughen his heart up which physically hurt from the words that left your mouth. Why was it so hard for him to convince himself you were just putting up a façade? “I miss you so much.. please, please, call me. I love you.”
The message ended abruptly, making him snap back from his zone as he had sat next to the landline, against the sofa with his head laid back. His face suddenly felt cold from the tear-stained areas. He didn’t have the heart to confront you, to hear it all from you firsthand, admitting you had found someone else and had moved on. That you wanted it to end so you could start a new chapter with the new guy. His weak heart wouldn’t be able to handle that alongside remembering the beautiful details of your relationship where you had managed to be his rock during every trial.
His train of thoughts were interrupted as his phone went off, the screen indicating a call from a friend of his from a female kpop group. It was weird enough that she was calling at such an hour so when he saw she had called once before as well, he immediately picked up.
“Hi, I’m so sorry to call twice as such an hour,” she immediately blurted out as soon as he answered, earning a slight chuckle from him.
“Are you, though?”
“I am, I swear. But I did so because one, y/n hasn’t been receiving my calls for some reason and your show just ended so I figured you’d be up right now. Tired as fuck, but up.” Namjoon hummed in response, wiping away his tears as if she would be able to notice them if he didn’t. “and two, I was packing up and realized she left her pendant in my dressing room from a few weeks ago.”
He was just about to tell her to directly call y/n or simply end the conversation with a generic ‘I’ll let her know’ but then his mind instantly clicked something, “your dressing room?”
“Yeah, during MAMA, just before my performance.” She informed, chuckling as if remembering something. “She came over and saw how stressed I was and decided that dressing up and modelling as a drag queen would help release ample dopamine in my system and I’m talking the drag makeup included. It was terrifying but helped nonetheless, especially when I was called on-stage in five and she ran to wipe the beautiful art off of her face. Such a pity you didn’t get to see it, you would’ve fallen even deeper in love if you had, if possible.”
Namjoon felt numb. His hand holding the phone began hurting from clutching onto the phone so tightly as he heard the revelation, unable to blink or breathe for a while as he began understanding just what was being revealed, “hello? Can you please let her know I have her pendant so she doesn’t freak out about losing it? It took ages to convince her to take it off so she could wear the heavy neck piece which would complement her drag queen look without it being overshadowed by your anniversary gift. Gosh, she must be paranoid right now, I hope I’m not too late.” She laughed slightly in the end, but Namjoon’s face wouldn’t even show a hint of a smile. It was cold, hard, numb.
The remaining life had been sucked out of him as he heard her after that but didn’t listen to her because his whole mind was occupied at this point. It was blank but yet filled, and he felt so stupid. He felt pathetic, and he felt like a traitor. At this point, it wasn’t about what he was going to do, but what he was going to say.
As your voice begging him to talk to you began echoing in his now empty brain, he struggled to get up and search for his shoes because the only thing he could do other than lose his sanity was going to you instantly.
It had been so long, and it had been so wrong.
part 2
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Hi! Been so long, oh my goodness. How are you all?
So much has been happening, will soon do a q&a where we will talk and all catch up. 😂
Tell me what you thought of this and if you want a part 2! 💜 Love you, bbies. 😻
Taglist: @hopetookmysoul @heartsforhoran @greenmoriiii @rjsmochii @armixers-unite @ettessray @mydear-youresopretty @and-sprite13 @joonie-vevo @jeonvaleria626 @mtgforall
Let me know if you want to be tagged!
Arirang in Busan D2 - Namjoon cut
I CAN'T BREATHE 🥵 (cr. @taee )
heartbeat, my heartbeat (nuts, pt 3) | k.nj
ᝰ nuts masterlist
rating/genre: angst with some fluff, smut, idol! namjoon x event planner! reader
summary: joonie and hanna spend some quality time together, then go their own ways as their hearts break.
warnings: shower sex, unprotected, penetration (p in v), MINORS DNI 18+, masturbation, throat fucking, oral, cussing, slapping, mating press, dumbification, joon says i love you, pet names, mentions of nipple piercings, brat taming… lmk if i missed anything
word count: 2.8k
hanna’s pov
we wake up tangled in each other. such an interesting way to start the day, with someone you met so long ago yet click so well with. everything is perfect right now, the sun hidden by blackout curtains, the room is cold but the blanket is weighted and his body’s warm.
he blinks his eyes open, subconsciously pulling me to lay on top of him, playing with my hair between his fingers. “come back to korea with me” he says, i’m quite shocked by this offer. it’s blind, he doesn’t actually mean it, he’s saying this because he’s pussy whipped. i look up at him, my cheek on his chest. eyes are looking at me so intensely, like if i say no, he might die.
i smile, “what? that’s crazy”, playfully pushing his shoulder. he grabs my wrist tenderly, kissing my knuckles, “i’m serious, princess. i’m serious about us”
my heart sinks, i can’t drop everything for him. maybe four years ago i would have, but im not twenty two anymore. back then, i was freshly out of college and confused on everything in my life. my career, what i wanted for my love life, if i wanted to live in los angeles or new york. but now i know what i want and its not anything serious. i can’t have anything serious when all i feel for life is grief, not in a suicidal way or anything, i really do love my life. but sometimes the weight of the world pushes me down and i can’t get up. i might not have woken up feeling like that today but i will eventually, i can’t imagine subjecting anyone to my mood swings, much less this sweet angel of a man.
“im not all that, you know?” i say, knowing i am all that, i’m the shit. but i can’t let him fall for me.
“you could just stay with me, i’ll cover everything. i have two free weeks” he pushes. i think about it, what it would be like to stay with him. we’d probably have sex too much for our own good, he’d probably teach me a lot of korean, show me around everywhere. maybe he’d even try to introduce me to his parents…
“i am employed, if you remember” i reply, hoping hell get me trying to say no.
“okay but what if you cleared your schedule sometime, not right now, to go?” he really isn’t quitting.
“can i think about it?” i ask, he nods, pulling his arms around me as i lay on top of him.
this morning, or rather this afternoon, is blissful. but this kind of bliss, i don’t trust, it never lasts.
-
kiwi woke up shortly after i decided i needed to get ready for the day. i only flew out here to work on the ama’s, but im here for a few days regardless, i love vegas.
namjoon told me he has a free day today, then two back to back shows after that.
“should we stay in and fuck all day?” he asks while peppering kisses all over my face. i smile, catching his lips, breaking the kiss only to say “that doesn’t sound like a bad idea”
i drop what i was doing to kiss him properly. we only made out last night, both too tired to do anything else. i’ve thought about that night we had for a long, long time.
he breaks the kiss to take off the top i just put on, mouth gaping at my chest. “these are new,” he states, talking about my pierced nipples. “yeah, got them pierced three years ago” i say, reconnecting our lips. he guides us to the couch, he’s sitting and im straddling him.
“i’ve fucked my hand so many times thinking about you like this,” he says between kisses, placing sloppy hickeys on my neck, collarbones… i’m a mess by the time he reaches my nipples.
“you like your breasts kissed, princess?”
“mhm” i mumble, feeling too good to actually say anything. he’s teasing the fuck out of me, playing with the metal around my nipples, holding onto my waist.
i push him off of me, giving me a confused look, i tell him to take his pants off. straddling him when his cock springs free, he’s so hard and i know it’s because of me.
“you said you fucked your hand thinking about me?” i say while circling his tip with my thumb, he nods. “show me” he looks at me like sin, not believing im asking such thing of him.
“cmon, joonie, show me…” i take my hands off him but stay straddling his legs, “…i wanna see what i’ve been missing this whole time”
“don’t be shy,” i say. i see his facial expression drop, “fuck this,” he grunts, pushing me off of him now. i know he’s not mad at me but i cant help myself, i wanna push his buttons more.
“you wanna see how i dealt with not seeing you for four years?” he asks, gripping my waist, making me follow him to the bathroom. he takes off every piece of clothing i have on, one by one. my top, my bottoms, my bra, panties… but he doesn’t touch me, not the way i want him to.
he’s taking off his shirt, pulling me into the shower, turning on the water. before i can even think he’s lifting me up to sit on the shelf by the window. he’s lined up exactly right to fuck me here, i can tell he sees that, but he controls himself. “every time i was in the shower, i thought about you…” his hands reach down to his cock, rubbing the tip with his big hands, “…and now you’re right in front of me acting like a fucking brat making me touch myself. so i’ll show you how”
his backs against the wall, water dripping all over his toned chest. his hair soaked, neck exposed as he looks up from pleasure, hands fisting himself, looking so hot. he groans as his eyes shut, dick looking painfully hard. there’s a vein that goes alongside it, pulsing. i know he feels so good right now, not as good as he could feel inside of me, though.
i get down from the shelf, moving over to him. “i can make you feel better,” i say, it comes out as a whisper. i go to touch him but he slaps my hand away, “oh now you wanna touch me?” he says, backing me into the wall. i nod and giggle like the brat i am and this clearly frustrates him. “such a fuckin brat, you love pissing me off, huh?”
i smile as i put my hands around him, he’s trying to act all tough but he melts as soon as my hands work him up and down.
“damn, you shut up real fast….” i tease, “…makes me wonder what you’d be like with my mouth on you”
his eyes widen, whispering “fuck” as i get down on my knees to take him in my mouth. feeling him hit the back of my throat, he’s big. his hands tangled in my wet hair as he starts fucking my throat out of pure lust. grunting and panting, sounding so good, i can image the sounds from my throat are turning him on, too.
“fuck, princess…” he groans, my nose brushing his pelvis with one deep thrust, “…i thought about you around my dick like this, never thought you’d feel this good”
i hollow my cheeks to suck him harder, lapping him up and down again as he lets go of my hair. he grabs my face with both of his hands as i’m going down on him again, using his thumbs to caress my cheek. “such a brat,” slapping me ever so lightly. he comes down my throat with the hottest groan i have ever heard.
“ruin me” i say, looking up at him. he lets out a laugh that sends chills down my spine and almost makes me regret telling him that.
“you don’t know what you’re asking for,”
except i very much do. i get up from the floor, not daring to break eye contact, running my hands up his toned stomach, sliding my finger over his nipples to see if i can get a reaction out of him; he sucks in a moan.
i ask, “are you gonna fuck me or do i have to do it myself?”
his smirk doesn’t hide anything as he’s moving me back to the shelf, hoisting me up by my waist once again. “how many guys have you fucked since me?” he unexpectedly asks,
“dated one for two years, had a fuck buddy for a few months after that” i admit, the fuck buddy was the ex.
“yeah? he fuck you good?” he says, slipping his tip inside of me. just the tip.
he’s teasing me so bad, but i feel like this is more of a punishment.
“he did, actually…” i start playing with my clit, “…he fucked me into my bed every night, like a man’s supposed to”
he slaps my manicured hands away from my own pussy, using his fingers as a replacement, still taking his tip in and out of me.
“these guys your age don’t know how to treat a woman, i know how to treat you” he says as his fingers lightly tap my clit. “who said he was my age?”
his laugh rumbles deep in my chest, all at once he’s sinking into me and i’m wet enough to take him. “prettiest fuckin brat ever, if i had you all to myself id fuck you all day”
he feels so good inside of me, sending electric shocks through my whole body. i feel him grab the back of my knees, pushing them up to my chest as he presses himself against me. going deeper, and harder.
i feel any sense of thoughtfulness in my mind go away, he’s fucking me dumb. he’s fucking me so good i can’t think. i feel him in my stomach, i feel him in my mouth, everywhere. it feels so, so good.
i mumble out something incoherent, my vision going hazy, tears slipping down my cheek because of how good im feeling.
“you crying because your cunt feels so good?”
i nod rapidly, taking the deepest breath Ive ever taken in my life. his thrusts get sloppier and deeper, burying his face into the crook of my neck as my arms wrap around him.
“my pretty girl, i’ve been yours since the day i met you…” he says as he spreads my legs, rubbing circles on me, “…been yours forever, will always be yours”
i’m a moaning mess and he keeps whispering sweet nothings to me as he shoots his load inside of me, he feels way too good. fucking me through my own orgasm, keeping a steady thumb on my clit. “joonie, too much. i’m gonna come again”
“squirt for me,”
and i do, leg twitching and all.
“good girl, doin what i say”
he brings his fingers up to his mouth, tasting me. doing this with him has to be the most satisfying feeling ever, we’re so compatible like this.
-
namjoons pov
“when are you leaving” i ask, not wanting to let her go just yet
“in two days, what about you?”
“in two days too” i say, except that’s a lie. we’re leaving after we finish our two shows here, and tonight’s the last one.
we’ve been hanging out every day between my work schedule, with all our concerts and fittings i’ve made time to see her in between.
right now we’re in line to order coffee, some fans have recognized me, they we’re really respectful though, either just ignoring me or saying “hi joon” and going about their day. in which, id say “hi army” back to them.
i have to be back at my hotel in an hour, now im just cherishing my time with her. today’s the last concert in vegas, then im back in korea tomorrow. but i wanna spend more time with her.
moving up in the line, i confess, “im actually leaving tomorrow but…” i face her, “…ill stay if you want me to”
she looks at me with a smirk, “i always want you to stay”
i squeeze her hand at this, i love her i love her i love her.
“i can take whoever’s next” an old lady with white hair and blue eyes says. hanna steps up and asks how she is, “oh sweetie, i’m very well. been running this coffee shop for decades now and this past week has been a record in our sales.”
i smile, this is a cute coffee shop. there are people doing their work on the tables, families catching up, friends gossiping. “what’s your favorite part of the store?” hanna asks, always so thoughtful.
the lady looks up, thinking, “hmm, has to be the tree i built it around,” pointing to the left corner, where a tree stands. it looks like a bigger version of a bonsai tree, it’s so cute.
someone behind us says “can you guys hurry up?”. hanna apologizes, i roll my eyes, have some fuckin patience.
we order, i pay. she gets mad at me for this, “joon, i have money. you know that, right?”
“yeah, i do” i say,
“so why’d you pay?” she asks, sitting down in an empty booth, further away from the front
“because you deserve the world… and not to mention i could buy a mansion right now before our coffees even ready.”
the buzzer goes off, indicating the orders ready.
hanna sits up to grab it, but she’s my girl and she deserves to be taken care of; not just money wise, so i grab it.
“wow joon, you’re spoiling me right here” she giggles, taking a sip of her latte.
“you deserve to be taken care of, hanna”
looking up at me, eyes hazy, she says “okay”
and i know that’s her letting me.
-
two days of just me and her, tangled in each others souls. i extended my trip here, changed my flight, stayed with hanna. it’s been so surreal just living with her like this. we bring kiwi with us almost everywhere, she’s starting to think i’m her dad.
we had a wine tasting she was able to squeeze me into last minute, i never really thought i was going to be able to have a relationship this normal, one where i can freely go out in public, somehow she’s making that possible.
two days of absolute peace and happiness.
the hours before our flight was bittersweet, she had a red eye and i was out in the morning, i went to the airport with her anyways. we spent the whole night in bed, talking about nothing yet everything, kiwi in between us. she told me everything about her life, including that night on the rooftop.
“i wasn’t even supposed to be up there, it was the day after i graduated college, i was such a mess. i was on a graduation trip with my girl friends but i couldn’t take it, the weight of it all falling down on me.”
i listen attentively, never having been to college but understanding her nonetheless. i know what it feels like to have a constant put in your stomach, like something’s always weighing you down. i play with her hair and she talks, “sometimes life is just like that, joonie. you hate it and then you love it and then you want to end it all, and then you come back around and figure out it’s not that deep, and then you actually realize it is that deep. everything in this world is about how long you can hold on, life is about how long you can hold on. people like us, we feel everything, there will always be a grief in our hearts about being alive.”
i’ve never met someone who feels what i feel.
“these feelings will never go away.”
-
me and her both have bloodshot eyes standing through tsa, paparazzi followed us all the way. i’m having a hard time caring about that, i know pictures of us will be out in the morning; my arms wrapped around her as she stands in my hoodie. but i don’t care, oh fucking well. we get into the lounge the company rented out for me, for privacy.
“you’re not gonna forget about me, right?” she looks up, teary eyed. i will absolutely never forget her, she doesn’t know what she’s made me feel. i felt like i was drowning but she held me up, even after all this time.
“i’m in love with you, hanna”
that makes her tears slip out, even though i can tell she’s trying so hard not to cry. the tears flow against her will, bringing her into my arms i say, “meeting you saved me”
it also ruined me, but that’s never something id admit.
after a long time of us holding each other, she whispers that her flight is about to leave. it goes against everything im feeling to let her go.
taglist
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
OnlyFans Amateur
Pairing: OnlyFans Creator/Roommate NamjoonXFem!Reader
Genera: Smut
Summary: You find out your roommate Namjoon is an OnlyFans creator and had a collab fall through. He is worried about making rent on time and asks you to be in a video with him to help him make his deadline. Before you make your decision, you do your own research.
Preview: “Did you like what you watched?” He persisted, taking another sip of his drink.
“I uh, didn’t watch anything. I just scrolled really.” You lied very unconvincingly.
“You know, these walls are very thin.” He explained, using his finger to tap against the eggshell white paint of the kitchen. “Any little sound, or buzzing noise, can be heard very well. So let’s try answering that question again.”
Content Warning: 18+ NSFW. NO MINORS. Service Dom! Namjoon. Sub! Reader. Reader is kind of annoying and pushy in the beginning for the plot sorry. Masturbation (f). Mention of watching porn w description of m/m videos (bisexual Namjoon), solo videos, and m/f videos. Talk about porn/sex. Nipple play. Dry humping. Oral sex. (M and f receiving) Fingering. Major overstimulation. Multiple orgasm. Pussy worship. Use of sex toys. Squirting. P in V. Dirty talk. Use of pet names like: baby, good girl. Praise. Birth control is implied idk.
Tag list: @woohwachaos @mintyunho @nowornevermarie @dayho3 @hoofymalone @auxiny @daeteez @b-tangkitten
[TRAD ITA] 260610 STORIE INSTAGRAM DI RM:
"1° anniversario dal congedo militare ㅠㅠ"
Traduzione a cura di BICS (©maru)
Dimples [Namjoon x Plus Size! Reader]
synoposis: the one where Namjoon is trying to show he's down bad for you
warnings: mdni, 18+, popular! Namjoon, plus size! reader, praise, namjoon fell first, dirty talk, alcohol mentioned, multiple orgasm, protected smut, a cute love story, college au, mention of jin, mention of jimin, flirting, chain necklace, manhandle, etc.
requested: Can you write plus-size girlie fics for Namjoon and Yoongi? I appreciate plus-size rep especially when it’s for Namjoon (Yoongi too), but there aren’t tons of fics for Joon. Don’t know why the man is fine as hell☺️- inside and out.
Tagging: @gottafightwhentheysaybehave
A/N: shout out to @ahgasegotarmy116 for reading this when it was only half done and sharing similar brain cells as me! Also, ignore that I've used these photos before. I love them, okay? lol
wc: 4.3k +
Everything about Namjoon is big.
If you were to ask his friends to describe him, they’d laugh, bunching their shoulders up to give off a taller and broader stance before simply saying, “big body.”
And it was true.
Namjoon had bulked up in college, finishing long days in the gym with a workout to relieve all the stress of classes, a part-time job, and the dread that one day in the future he might actually have to get a driver’s license and not ride a bike everywhere he went.
His body had developed thick muscles, toned hips, and broad shoulders that he almost had to enter through doorways sideways to get in.
He was a big man, and only someone soft and warm could ever handle his strength.
Someone like you.
260528 - 오레오와 방탄소년단의 만남! ‘오레오 & 방탄소년단 한정판 쿠키’ 출시

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Summary: Laundry day means you have no clean clothes to wear. Lucky for you, your husband has an entire closet full of clothes. So what happens when he comes home to find you wearing one of his tee-shirts with nothing else on? He fucks you against the washing machine of course
Word Count: 3K
Rating: 18+ Minors Do Not Interact!
Tags: porn with no plot, shameless smut, soft dom Namjoon, dirty talk, swearing, size kink, big body Namjoon, Kim Namjoon has a big dick, fingering, pussy eating, male and female orgasms, fucking raw (wear protection!) this is just filthy sex idk what else to say
Authors Note: So in my part of the world the weather is getting HOT. Last night I was doing laundry in just a tee-shirt which inspired this. Guys I'm just down so bad for big body Namjoon.
Thanks for reading Likes and Reblogs are appreciated
Also don't be scared to talk about it in the tags!
The thing about life is that sometimes you are so busy living it, other things get left behind.
With the heat of summer in full swing, your responsibilities have taken a back seat in favour of bonfires, beach days, and many nights spent drinking on a patio under the stars.
So it's unsurprising when you wake up on a random Tuesday with almost no clothes in your closet and a dejected laundry basket nearly overflowing.
You let out a sigh and swing your legs out of bed, watching as the rays of midday sun create lines on your wood floors.
You strip out of your pyjamas in favour of one of Namjoon’s old shirts while you drag the laundry basket across the floor.
namjoon's normal log 🤍