Namandabu

I had a dream last night that I was in our family home and that there was a terrible storm outside. I dreamt that my mother, stubborn as always, refused to get to the basement, or under a doorway. She didn't want to move out of the sunlight, even though it was blocked by raging storm clouds.

I was terrified. What scares me most about storms like that isn't getting swept away; it's getting hit by something else that got swept away. I remember the wind was a dull roar, and trees and other houses in our neighborhood were torn out of the ground and blown to pieces.

When I woke up this morning, it was snowing. It was the first real snow of the season. I had waited so long to see snow on the ground. We had all the right weather but no moisture, and the soil had become dry.

I was so afraid of not getting snow. It was another reminder of change. There is always change, of course, but this reminded me of change for the worse, the kind of change that comes with an ending. Our summer was unseasonably hot, and our winter was unseasonably dry. We are no longer getting enough rain or snow to sustain things, so things are dying.

When I saw snow this morning, I was happy but sad. I know there is less and less each year. I've been alive long enough to see it start declining. So today, I will go outside and shovel the driveway in shorts and a T-shirt.

My name is Majed, and my family and I are trying to rebuild our lives after the war destroyed everything we had, including our home.😔 My children are studying at university, trying to build a better future, but how can they succeed without a safe place to call home?🏠😥

Unfortunately, the campaign is moving slowly, and we still need your help. All we need is a secure home to protect my children and restore the safety we've lost.🙏🏻🇵🇸

As Christmas 🎄 approaches, a time of hope and love, we dream of a safe home to celebrate together. Your support, no matter how small, makes all the difference.

https://gofund.me/abbc2759

Wishing you a Merry Christmas filled with peace and love.✨❤️

I hope this message finds you well. My name is Aziz, and I’m reaching out with a heartfelt plea to help my family find safety and reunite with our mother. 😞

The ongoing war in Gaza has torn my family apart. My mother and newborn sister are stranded in Egypt, while I, along with the rest of my sex family members, am trapped in the midst of the genocide in Gaza. We have not only been separated but have also lost our home and are enduring unimaginable hardships. 💔

Your support can make a difference. Whether by reading our story, donating, or sharing our campaign with others, you can help us reunite, find safety, and start anew. 🙏🕊

Thank you, from the depths of my heart, for your kindness, compassion, and solidarity during this difficult time. ❤🍉

https://gofund.me/58268669 🔗

A puzzling aspect of Jodo Shinshu's teachings, as well as those of other Pure Land Schools, is that they promote an easy practice that is paradoxically also very difficult. Shinran talks about how the path is easy, but in the same breath, says that "for beings of arrogance and ignorance, this difficulty [hearing the Primal Vow with no doubt], none surpasses."

For me, the doubt isn't really about the Vow. The doubt is in me. There is no reason that I should change my entire belief system, no logical one anyway. How can I even know if I fully trust in Amida if I already adhere to wrong views?

This line of thinking is, and I mean this in the most academic way possible, heretical. The reason is that it puts Shinjin at an infinite distance from me and makes it unattainable. Shinjin is the absence of doubt, so to check if I have received it, logically, I should search my mind for doubts. However, I can never search the entirety of my mind. Therefore, I can never verify Shinjin, and I can never stop questioning it. Through this line of reasoning, I have cleverly made Shinjin impossible through calculation.

In Jodo Shinshu, calculation and doubt are seen as one thing. Calculation means trying to discern the working of the Vow through logical means, whether that is trying to understand it directly or reasoning that we must add something to it to be reborn in the Pure Land. It can also mean rationalizing the Vow away entirely, refuting its existence and the existence of Amida. Doubt is about doubting the efficacy of the Vow. If you try to calculate the working of the Primal Vow with a limited mind, you doubt its universal efficacy. If you refute the Vow, then you refute its efficacy.

The problem with my logic above is that I am trying to calculate the Vow. I am trying to measure Shinjin through observable evidence, or the lack thereof, evidence that is also unattainable. Even if they were attainable, and I could search my mind for hidden doubts, I would never be satisfied. If I couldn't find them, it would just mean I'd have to keep searching. If I did find them, I would lament my lack of Shinjin. But Shinjin is lacking in this whole cycle from start to finish.

In fact, if I could search my whole mind for hidden doubts and find them, I should be happy! Beings of heavy karma are the people for whom the Vow was fashioned. Therefore, having hidden doubts means Amida embraces me even more. In other words, my birth in the Pure Land is settled, and my doubts prove that fact.

All the difficulty lies in internalizing this. Whether it is internalized is simply a matter of stored karmic good from the past. The path is easy because nothing has to be done on our part except to deeply hear the Dharma. It is difficult because of the Three Poisons of Greed, Anger, and Ignorance that cloud our minds. The difficulty of this path is, therefore, empty and illusory, but it hinders us because we put stock in illusion.

When I have an intrusive thought, I should simply say Namuamidabutsu.

Death comes, but I'm not afraid. I should be afraid but I'm not.

I remember when I was truly afraid of death. This is because I was face-to-face with it, not for myself, but for my mother. For the first time, I was experiencing the single most potent unrelenting, and yet untapped source of human fear...

and I crumpled.

It was in these cowering moments that the teaching of the Buddha reached me. What all the masters said was true: contemplation of death is a surefire entryway into the Dharma.

And now, three years on, and I'm no longer afraid. How shameful! How sad and pathetic and utterly pitiful! I live life as though I can take it with me, holding onto everything like trying to catch smoke with my hands, unaware of my demise!

When I had the fear, I could prepare. I could fight it because it was with me. Now I have forgotten true fear, and no matter how much I contemplate death, I will never have that fear again.

And so I'm afraid because I am unafraid. Because I cannot prepare, death comes unexpectedly. Because it comes unexpectedly, it is accompanied by fear, sorrow, regret, and misery. I'm afraid of the fear of dying that comes with death. I am afraid of the fear I don't have now but will have in the future. In short, I'm afraid to die. I'm afraid I won't see it coming.

In silent, solitary moments though

When lights are out, and eyes are low

The fear of death may take its place

Brought in by Amida's Grace

Today, while I was attending the service at my Temple online, one of the cats that lives at our house wanted to come into the room. She is a small Tortiseshell kitten, with a huge personality. She came in, explored the room, and eventually fell asleep on the bed nearby while I listened to the Dharma Talk.

In this sense, she and I are much the same. Truth be told, I am a bad student. Don't get me wrong, I am good at school, but this does not mean that I'm a good student by any means. If I had a dollar for every time I fell asleep during a lecture or class, I would be able to pay my college debt in full.

With Buddhism, it is no different. My mind often wanders during Dharma talks, and I have fallen asleep on one or two occasions! This is a shame, but I think it is also a great joy. That I am even in these sessions with these great people giving these talks is such a precious and wonderous thing that simply falling asleep during it cannot ruin it for me. In fact, it makes the whole experience unique, as though this Dharma was tailored to bad students like me. Because even though I fall asleep during these talks, I don't feel like my fundamental understanding wavers that much. Of course, I still have doubts, but they are quelled by the simple recitation of the Nembutsu and by the simple truth that Amida never forgets or abandons those within his infinite Light.

In the Larger Sutra, Shakyamuni Buddha talks about how one can hear the Pure Land Dharma if one has seen a Buddha in a previous life. Yet also, blind passions can obstruct this hearing momentarily. My mind wandering is evidence of this, yet I keep coming back.

Perhaps, in a past life, I was a rambunctious kitten. Perhaps after a long day of hunting mice, playing, and making mischief, I wandered into a temple hall. I like to think that I took a nap there, unnoticed by the attendees listening to Shakyamuni, and perhaps that is what led to this moment right now.

This is a thought that I had while thinking about my recitation of Nembutsu in my daily life. It is often accompanied by a feeling that my recitation is insufficient or deficient. The Shinshu view of this is that a thought like this comes from the calculating mind where we think that we can do something for Amida to accept us into the Pure Land. In essence, it is doubt of the Primal Vow and an incorrect view of the situation. Amida doesn't deny anyone. Great Compassion is unconditional.

However, when I think about why I feel this way when I recite, I find it also comes from a place of correct view at the same time. My Nembutsu will never be good enough because I am not an enlightened being. When I think about why I feel like my Nembutsu is insufficient, it is because I myself am not an inherently good person. I'm selfish, I do selfish things. The person saying the Nembutsu has a heart that is turbulent, and gripped by desires and passions that pull him every which way. Meanwhile, Amida is a perfectly enlightened being who has gone beyond the limited self and exemplifies limitless compassion. This dichotomy of my ignorant existence and Amida is the heart of this feeling of insufficiency. This is correct view, in my mind. It accurately represents the situation at hand.

"Even a virtuous person can attain Birth in the Pure Land, how much more easily a wicked person."

This is the central quote of Chapter 3. It completely flips the common-sense notions of morality and results that are preached and practiced not only in Buddhism but also in many other major religions.

In Christianity (with some exceptions), your faith and your virtue are what get you to heaven. In other forms of Buddhism, you cultivate virtues and merit in order to attain enlightenment through one of the many gates of practice. The great mercy and work of the Buddha is in giving you the tools to do that and helping you gain understanding. But you still ultimately do the work.

Jodo Shinshu is different. In Jodo Shinshu, the Buddha has already completed the work. The realization you get in Jodo Shinshu comes from the Buddha directly, not as the result of any practice or good act on your part. That realization comes not in spite of our imperfections and selfishness but because of it. Our imperfections are part of the conditions leading to our settled mind that entrusts to Amida (Shinjin). The other conditions are things like stored good karma from the past and the proximity to a good teacher of the Dharma.

These are things that are out of our control. In fact, trying to control them hinders Shinjin because you are excluding yourself from the Primal Vow by asserting your own abilities. The issue is that the nature of wisdom is naturalness. When you try to control it, you put walls up, blocking the light from coming in.

Recall that "good" and "evil" have different meanings in Jodo Shinshu. In this context, a "virtuous" person is one who does good deeds. Because they do good deeds, they think themselves to be good and think that being good will get them to enlightenment. They are not necessarily wrong if they can do these deeds with a selfless attitude and are persistent enough with their practices. However, for many people, this task is insurmountable.

Doing deeds of merit in this life will get you only so far. Unless you are able to build vast merit now, your next lives will be spent in vain. You'll be reborn in Samsaric realms with no memory of anything you learned. The stored good from your previous lives may or may not ripen soon. If it isn't soon, you're stuck here for another hundred, another thousand, another million lifetimes.

A response to this might be that we should take the Esoteric paths of Buddhism. These paths are designed to yield solid results in a single lifetime. However, now the difficulty is compounded, for these paths involve difficult esoteric practices which are transmitted from Guru to student. For many of us, we will never be able to find a proper Guru. Even if we do, they may determine (and rightly so) that we are not suited to these practices.

The Jodo Shinshu path begins with a realization of powerlessness. I am not in control of the situation. Instead, we must allow our faults and limitations to become wisdom through the work of Amida and the Primal Vow. There is a saying in Jodo Shinshu from Rev. Takashi Miyaji: "We do not grasp Wisdom, Wisdom grasps us."

The reason that the evil person is more easily able to get to the Pure Land is because the intent of the Vow is to save all of us. The one thing that all sentient beings, even some higher-level Bodhisattvas, have in common is delusions and afflictions. Therefore, in order to save all those who need it, Amida fashioned the Vow, especially for those of us mired in afflictions. Our afflictions become the condition for our Birth instead of a hindrance to it when we are made to realize that we are the intended audience for this Dharma. Those with less afflictions are included under its umbrella, but the Vow prioritizes those needing saving the most. A good person may get it in their mind that they are not in need of the Vow to reach enlightenment. As a result, they will not accept this teaching. A person who is aware of their afflictions, however, is much more likely to entrust to Amida and reach enlightenment swiftly. This awareness is part of the gift of Shinjin and is inseparable from it.

There are many little moments of this in my own life, but I'll leave you with one that stuck with me. It is the kind of selfless realization that could not come from my own mind.

At one time during 2022, I was a vegetarian. I did this because I had read a piece by Master Hsuan Hua detailing how the violence against animals and the violence between other sorts of beings are actually interrelated. I was horrified and decided to stop eating meat.

Fast-forward to later in the year, and at a party, I saw that someone had made these dinosaur chicken nuggets. Unthinking, I immediately ate one and then popped another in my mouth before someone looked at me and said, "Aren't you a vegetarian?". I was mortified and spit it out.

A few days later, I was thinking about this whole incident and realized that what I felt resulted from a selfish underlying motive. I started being a vegetarian because of what I read, but as time bore on, it became part of my identity. It became a face I had to put on to maintain an appearance of consistency in the eyes of those around me and a source of self-clinging. I was a vegetarian, which meant that if I acted in a way contrary to that statement, it would cause suffering, which it did. I wasn't doing it for the animals or the people. What seemed to be a selfless decision had a selfish ulterior motive hidden beneath it. I used vegetarianism to place myself on a pedestal above others, including other Buddhists!

Obviously, this is just one small example, but it encompasses the ideas of Chapter 3 in microcosm. This realization was not my own doing. I didn't come to it rationally. And it illustrates how even a selfless spiritual practice can be undercut by more sinister motives. Moreover, my failure became a lesson in my own nature as a selfish being. I still recall this incident when thinking about Amida. I see it as evidence that the Primal Vow is designed for me.

In this chapter, Shinran answers those who came to see him and inquire about the practices leading to Birth in the Pure Land. In this section, he gives what is his most confounding statement.

He opens by saying that he is only knowledgeable about the practice of Nembutsu, and that other esoteric practices can be learned from other teachers at Nara or Mt. Hiei, two hubs of Buddhist scholarship and thought in Japan at the time. For him, he summarizes:

"For me, Shinran, there is no alternative but to accept and trust in the teaching of my master Hōnen: that simply by uttering the nenbutsu I shall be given deliverance by Amida."

He says that he does not even know if Nembutsu is the practice that will lead to his birth or not. His reasoning for continuing the practice is that because he is "incapable of any meritorious," the Nembutsu is his only option.

He reasons, however, that from the truth of Amida's Vow flows naturally the truth of Shakyamuni's teachings, the truth of Master Shandao's teachings, and the truth of Master Honen's teachings. Therefore, his experience of the Nembutsu and his teaching of it cannot be in vain.

This passage points to the crucial difference between self-power practice and other-power deliverance. The esoteric practices he references when talking about Nara and Mt. Hiei are self-powered. This means that they are activities that the practitioner actively participates in in order to facilitate the desired result. They operate on a causal principle: I do this list of activities, train my mind this way, and this will cause my birth in the Pure Land.

An example of these practices might be the way of practicing Nembutsu in Mainland Chinese Pure Land. Nembutsu, as practiced according to this tradition, is said to build a karmic relationship with Amida Buddha over time, culminating in the Nembutsu and mindfulness of the Buddha at the point of death, which causes Birth in the Pure Land.

The crucial thing here is that it relies on the person doing the practice to facilitate the result. Being grateful to Amida and fostering devotion are vital because they train the mind to be in tune with him. This is done so that when one dies, one can maintain mindfulness of Amida Buddha, which will cause the desired result.

Shinran says that he is incapable of doing this or any other practice leading to Birth in the Pure Land. It is impossible for him to exercise right-mindfulness like this of his own accord. Therefore, he must pursue the path of practice that is suitable to him, the path of other-power through vocal Nembutsu as the act of settlement of Birth in the Pure Land. Thus, rather than going to the Pure Land, he is "given deliverance by Amida."

In his language here, Shinran seems to indicate this gift is the result of Nembutsu. As we will see in further chapters, the gift of assurance of Birth and the Nembutsu are actually inseparable parts of the same thing.

The first part of the Tannisho is made up of quotes by Shinran, as recalled by Yuien-bo. This first chapter serves as an introduction to the rest by outlining the concept of other-power and its salvific effect on sentient beings and then emphasizing the universality of other-power.

In emphasizing the universality of the Primal Vow, Shinran says "We should realize that Amida's Original Vow never discriminates between the old and the young, the good and the evil and that what matters most is the heart of faith alone; for the vow was originally made for the purpose of delivering sentient beings sorely defiled by their vices and passions."

For me, I have often tried to answer the following question: Am I good, or am I evil? And it seems at first glance from Shinran's other writings that he is trying to tell me that I am evil. However, it is important to note that the teaching he is referring to is called "akunin shoki" in Japanese. In English, this means "The evil person is the intended target." In context, this means that the evil person is the target of the Primal Vow of Amida to deliver sentient beings to enlightenment. The first word, "akunin," is often translated as "evil person," but this does not do the word justice.

I will refer to the Calgary Buddhist Temple's Guide to Jodo Shinshu, found here:

http://calgary-buddhist.ab.ca/wp-content/uploads/JSGuide.pdf

On page 24, they have the following footnote: "Note: The notion of an evil person in Jodo Shinshu encompasses more than the conventional moral or ethical meaning of evil. Perhaps it refers more accurately to the notion of sentient beings who are full of kleshas or desires. Shinran Shonin often referred to himself as an evil person."

Perhaps a better translation of "akunin" would be "selfish person" because selfishness can take on forms that we mundanely consider to be both "good" and "evil." If I am moved to help someone in their time of need, is it because they need help or because I desire to help them? The answer is probably both, but the latter part reveals a form of selfish desire, even if it is wholesome. I want to help that person and gain gratification by doing so. Even if I desire nothing in return from them, I still feel good about the result of my actions. Would I take such actions if I could witness no such results? Maybe, but also maybe not. There are many causes I don't donate to and many ways to help, which I do not take advantage of. And, if I did, it would in part be for my own satisfaction, and not purely for the sake of others. Ultimately, I am more inclined to help a friend or loved one than a stranger. This reveals a selfish outlook.

Furthermore, I am no stranger to unskillful actions when they suit my own desires. Even with my (albeit sparse) knowledge regarding the Dharma, I still engage in actions that would be considered unskillful. My mind is constantly working to justify such actions to myself, and though I try to make progress in killing my bad habits, it is challenging to do.

Now, this does not mean that we should simply sit back and do nothing simply because anything we do is mixed with selfishness. Instead, it points to the attitude we should take when engaging with the world of Samsara. We should be careful in our actions, knowing they are motivated by our selfish desires. Furthermore, we should all the more entrust ourselves to the power of the Buddha, who transcends selfish desires and vows to bring us to the realization of selflessness. After all, being satisfied with our mundane goodness is not good enough. If we satisfy ourselves with our own actions, this is nothing more than stroking the ego, leading to more rebirth in Samsara. That is why the greatest good is the Nembutsu of gratitude to Amida; it comes from the mind that trusts in Amida for enlightenment in the next life and is the result of his great compassion, not our own small compassion. Stated in chapter 1:

"Therefore once faith in the Original Vow is steadfast, no other good is needed, for there is no good superior to the nenbutsu. No evil should be feared, for there is no evil powerful enough to obstruct Amida’s Original Vow."

Entrusting ourselves to the Buddha, we are able to spend our lives walking a path that ends in our enlightenment. Along the way, he makes us deeply aware of our faults and errors, deepening our trust in him and ensuring our birth in the Pure Land.

When I first read the foreword to the first part of the Tannisho, I thought that my reflections would be about what divergences from the actual teaching there are today and how to best go about avoiding them. On reflection, however, I realize that I don't know nearly enough to comment on the modern state of Jodo Shinshu. I only know what others have said and commented on, but I don't have the scholarly credentials to verify or deny these claims. There are people whom I do trust when discussing the teaching, but I know that these people are also simply people with biases that guide their thinking, just like mine. What they believe to be a divergence could be just a teacher who is placing a different emphasis on the Jodo Shinshu Way. I don't know enough to comment one way or the other.

However, I will mention that many Jodo Shinshu writings are plainly worded, straightforward explanations of the Dharma, which leaves little room for misinterpretation. The Tannisho is a prime example of this style of writing. Rennyo Shonin's letters are another excellent example. In both cases, the goal of the authors is to lead people back to the simplicity of other-power faith (that is, Shinjin) by explaining things in such a plain manner that it leaves little room for our own interpretations. As I have said before on this blog in my post on Dharma Listening, this is essential to taking in the Dharma. As Yuien-bo says, "No one should defile the doctrine of other-power by his own arbitrary interpretations." What this means to me is that we should not project our own ideas onto the teaching, lest we miss what is being taught and instead focus on what we want to hear.

As we shall see, what is being taught is the simple process by which Amida, through the power of the Dharma, directs virtue to us as ignorant beings and brings us to the state of having one thought-moment of total reliance on him. This one moment is the moment of Shinjin. At that moment, we become assured of our Buddhahood in the next life when we will be born in the Pure Land. The utterance of the Nembutsu as a result of this moment is the "act of true settlement" (from the Shoshinge, the Hymn of True Shinjin and the Nembutsu, by Master Shinran) precisely because we are incapable on our own of uttering it in gratitude for the Buddha's benevolence without his gift of Shinjin. The whole process is completed through Amida, who fulfilled his great vows to liberate all sentient beings who say the Nembutsu. It is not due to our actions but his already-complete enlightenment that we can receive Shinjin and be assured of Buddhahood. This is my understanding of it, parrotted from the words of the preceding masters of the tradition.