no body no crime

"I never said I was an expert, I said they were my favorite. But if you really want me to mock you about that too I'll give it a shot." Bryson rolled his eyes, glancing towards the ceiling to play up the dramatics. "Maybe. It would explain all those bones I found in the backyard a few days ago." He settled comfortably between her legs when she pulled him closer, keeping his eyes on her face as he continued to trace his thumb along along the side of her jaw. Of course there was a part of him that was still on edge and nervous about what was to come but talking to her had given him reassurance that he hadn't realized he was really looking for in the first place. And focusing on her made it easier to stop himself from thinking about anything else. "I'm okay. Thanks for... being you, I guess."

"For being me?," she scoffed out a laugh, a twinkle of amusement in her eyes as she glanced up at him. "Definitely the first time I've heard that but okay, I'll take it." Nadine didn't have a particularly comforting presence, she'd always been cold, but with him she let her guard down, made herself available in ways nobody else had access to. Her friends saw glimpses of it too, the kind of person she could be when she wasn't so hellbent on being cruel- there'd have to be some redeeming quality of her's to keep them coming back. It was like their little secret, this softer side of her's, and anyone who knew it should feel so privileged. Once she'd booked everything she set her phone face-down on the counter, then hooked a finger under Bryson's chin to pull him in for a kiss. "I'll go pack and then we'll get out of here."

"Why would I? Those are my favorite." In reality he'd seen each movie once or twice at most, but holding it over her head was too good to pass up. "See? Hot." Bryson nodded, leaning in to trail his lips along the side of her jaw slowly to prove his point. "Then we'll do Florida." When she turned to face him he raised his free hand to rest along the side of her neck, trailing his thumb along her skin lightly. "Yeah, sure. But I still want to get out of here tonight so pack up a bag and we can do a hotel in the city until tomorrow. We don't even have to do anything else. We can just relax in the room and watch scary movies with takeout."

"Because you're the expert on my acting? And I was a cute kid, you should want to watch the old stuff." Even being as self-absorbed as she was, Nadine rarely watched any of her own work if she didn't have to, especially not anything she'd done in the last decade. Her earlier filmography was a bit easier to sit through, when she was at her prime, and not even because it was particularly great but she was far enough removed from it. The little girl in those movies felt like an entirely different person. "You don't think the apartment's haunted do you," she joked, deadpan, and hopped back onto the counter. She hooked her legs around the back of his knees to bring him into her, pulling her phone out again so she could book their flight and two hotels, then glanced back up at him. "Really, you're okay?"

"Oh I know you're funny. I've watched your Hallmark movies." Bryson's voice was taunting but when she moved for her phone he instinctively followed, leaning his head against the side of hers to glance at the screen. "Never been. To Florida or to Miami. I heard they have good food though so I'm not against it." When he'd suggested a mini vacation he'd figured they would get in the car and go until they found somewhere interesting enough to stop at, but if she wanted to go all out he wouldn't say no. He just thought smaller when it came to spending money, and he wasn't sure that was a habit he would ever really shake. "I don't know enough Spanish to understand if it's terrible or not, so you're in the clear. It's all hot to me. But we don't have to go to Florida."

She narrowed her eyes at him, playful, "Have you watched anything else of mine or just those? You need new material." It might've been easier to just get in the car and drive somewhere, and definitely a lot cheaper, but Nadine didn't really think like that- whatever she did, it was all out. Road tripping sounded like her own personal hell too, as much as she enjoyed Bryson's company. "Por supuesto que lo es... and no I know, I'm just saying it's one place I'd willingly go." She leaned back into him a little, lightly knocking her head against his as she weighed their options against how many airlines miles she had. "Leave early tomorrow, come back Sunday?," she asked as she peaked over her shoulder, then spun to face him completely, comfortably in his space. "I'll book it under doctor."

"Trusting people is overrated anyways. I'm good with just you." There were other people he knew he could lean on if he needed to but comparing that to the amount of faith he had in her was ridiculous. "Yeah. I guess you get a few points for that." Bryson had never tried to hide his past, but he'd never been as open and honest about things as he was with Nadine. Sharing things with her had never felt like something he had to work towards because he'd never really felt the need to explain himself. Early on it was clear they were on the same page. Maybe they'd gotten their different ways, but they had an understanding of each other and the world that he'd never had with another person. She'd always managed to make him feel less alone. "I know. I got you too." He sighed softly, enjoying the feeling of her hand along his back for a moment longer before he straightened up just enough to look her in the eye again. "Well now that you mentioned a beach I think we should start there. I can have a bag ready in five."

Selfishly she smiled, happy to be the one person he trusted and even happier to not share that trust with anyone else. It was tough to compare what she had with him to any of her other relationships, when even her closest friends had accused her of murder. "I'm pretty funny, in case you hadn't noticed." Part of what initially drew Nadine and her crew together in the beginning was their similar outlook on life- her and Bryson shared this too, except just like her he never apologized for it. He didn't like her in spite of her darkest parts but understood they were essential to who she was, and likewise she felt the same about him, sleepwalking and all. Her eyes narrowed as he looked at her. "I need a little more than five," she told him, not realizing he wanted to leave immediately. She gave his hand a quick squeeze than dropped it, moving to grab her phone off the counter so she could look up flights. "How do you feel about Miami," she said as she scrolled though some last-minute options, looking for something that wouldn't also require too much travel time. "Like if we had to go to Florida I guess. I'll let you hear some of my terrible Spanish."

She was trying, and that was enough to stop him from making a smartass comment. At least for the moment. And knowing he hadn't completely turned her off was eased some of the tension he hadn't realized he'd been carrying. On some level he was still sure he could eventually do something that would scare her off, so knowing they hadn't hit that point was a relief. "It hasn't happened since I was a kid. I figured I grew out of it. Everything with my parents? I was 18. Right near the end of my first year at Ravenwood. I thought I got a lucky break when I got a scholarship, but that had more to do with Rooney than anything. Or Rooney and my mom anyways." He grimaced in distaste at the memory. "My dad found out around the same time I did and that's what started everything." Bryson wasn't sure what response he'd expected from her but her words caused him to snort. "Jesus Christ. If that was a pep talk you should probably never give one again. Like, ever." He shook his head but the corners of his mouth twitched. If anyone else had called him crazy it would've been a different story completely, but she was holding his hand and making light of something that was one of his biggest insecurities even if he'd never admitted it and making it clear that they were in things together. Bryson huffed as he stepped forward to wind his free arm around her, burying his face against the side of her neck. "Thanks."

She had no shortage of baggage, between her child star murderer past and her tumultuous friendships, but it never scared Bryson off, even as she slowly unloaded it all, one puzzle piece at a time. Even if he did kill Dean Rooney, and she believed him when he said he didn't, it wouldn't change anything between them. "That's still not that long ago, grand scheme. It makes sense you wouldn't be over it- not that it's something you ever get over, but in how you cope with stress. Trusting people." They both had trust issues, his clearly stemming from his mother's infidelity, and despite how long they'd been together, how long they were friends even before that, it took time to fully break those walls down. One blip, like what happened with Reed, and they were back up. "Made you laugh though didn't I," she teased, watching him visibly relax in front of her. Sincerity wasn't her strong suit, nor was processing emotions, but she was trying, for him. It's not that he made her want to be a better person necessarily, that'd be ridiculous, but she wanted to be more honest, for him to know she had his back no matter what. Her free hand slipped just under the hem of his shirt as he embraced her, and she nestled her head against his. "Whatever you need, I'm here."

"Then we should be in the sun by a body of water somewhere. I'm not picky. Where you go I'll follow." He shrugged dismissively, catching his bottom lip between his teeth. He'd never believed that talking it out actually helped any situation, but shutting her out when she was asking him didn't feel like the right move either. She'd proven years ago that he could trust her with his secrets so there shouldn't have been anything stopping him. Though something about making himself look as weak as he felt in the moment still went against the grain. "I'm just stressed. School was one thing, but I caught myself sleepwalking a few times this week. Twice. And waking up in the middle of it, not knowing what's going on... it freaks me out. Even if it's only for a few seconds before it all clicks into place. It used to happen all the time when I was a little kid, but I haven't felt like that since- the night everything happened with my mom and dad I blacked out. One minute they were screaming at each other, then boom. I was sitting on the curb in front of the house and the cops were there, and for a few minutes I thought I was the one who- you know." Saying it out loud made him feel sick to his stomach, but that didn't change the truth of it all. For a moment he'd been afraid of what he might've done. "I talked to someone about it and it's fine. It hasn't happened in years, and the sleepwalking is just a stress response thing. It's just tripping me out a little bit, but it'll pass. I promise I'm not losing it or anything. I just need to relax a little bit and I'll bounce back."

Maybe she'd felt him get up in the middle of the night once or twice but Nadine didn't think anything of it, too heavy a sleeper to even register it. "We could tie you to the bed," she suggested, joking but not really joking. "Or to me, I don't know. Maybe if you have to wake me up every time you'll snap out of it quicker." She wasn't sure he was even looking for a solution but that was where her mind immediately went, how she could help. Reaching for his hand, she interlocked their fingers, thumb brushing across his knuckles. "I'm sorry. I figured you were stressed but I didn't know about the sleepwalking, or anything else." The black outs he'd told her about before, the reason he tried not to drink too much. She thought it was just a drinking thing honestly, so she didn't realize how long they'd been happening, that he'd dealt with them even as a kid. "How old were you?" They talked about his parents sometimes but never about what actually happened. There were the facts of course, police reports she'd dug up when they first met and she wanted to know what his deal was, but she didn't have his side of it, how it'd actually made him feel. He didn't need to share all that with her but she'd listen, if he did. "I don't think you're losing it," she assured him. "We'll just fuck off for the weekend and reset. Easy. And if that doesn't work..." The corners of her mouth twitched up, wanting to bring some levity to their conversation, show him none of this freaked her out without undermining his feelings. "Maybe a straight jacket?"

"I thought you liked cities, but if this is your way of saying you want to try roughing it I'm all ears. I might actually pay to see you camping. Or we could do somewhere with a beach." Bryson pulled his hands back defensively and shut off the water before he turned to look at her fully. "Nothing. It's fine. Just zoned out a little." He wiped his palms along the front of his jeans. "I keep- I've just got a lot on my mind with officially being out of school and moving on to residency now so I'm not-. It's fine."

"I do, and I never said anything about camping, absolutely not. But it's summer, I'd like to be in the sun. Preferably by a body of water somewhere." She watched him curiously, not as quick to dismiss whatever was clearly going on with him- even if he insisted it was nothing. He seemed nervous almost, or maybe just jumpy, and she couldn't say she'd ever seen that from him before. "Do you want to talk about it?," she offered, crossing the room to be closer to him, back leaned against the counter directly in front of him. "What's going on?"

"How would you feel about taking a long weekend?" Bryson glanced over his shoulder at Nadine for all of a few seconds before he went back to scrubbing at his hands, attempting to get the dirt that wasn't even there anymore out from under his nails. Sleepwalking was supposedly normal considering the amount of stress he was under, but Bryson couldn't stop himself from comparing it to his blackouts, which only served to make him even more stressed. It felt like a step in the wrong direction, and that alone made him more anxious than he cared to admit. "Chicago, New York, wherever. I won't even judge if you want to go somewhere cringy." @nadinedahl

"This weekend? Sure." There was nothing keeping Nadine in town, no prior obligations to attend to, so leaving at a moment's notice wasn't an issue. Bryson seemed to be on edge lately too, even more than usual. It made sense he'd want to get away for a bit- it'd probably be good for him, and Nadine was almost relieved she didn't have to suggest it herself. "How about somewhere with a beach, is that cringy? You just named two cities." She glanced to his hands in the sink, thinking they had to be rubbed raw by now with how long he'd been scrubbing at them, her brows knit together. "Do you have an open wound I should be worried about, what's happening over there?"

When it came to mind games Saskia was no match for Nadine, that had become clear going back and forth every time they crossed paths. Saskia had never claimed that she could outsmart her on that front but she certainly felt that she was better, older, and wiser than to give into her bouts. Which was specifically why she had gone out of her way to avoid these encounters, to save her own peace. But it seemed no matter how much she tried to pull away from her old friends they still gravitated towards each other like magnets, with just about the same push and pull. "Yes. When I was under the impression that we were equals. You know, something like partners. I will say, you're a better actress than you're given credit." Downing the rest of her drink in one shot. Drinking on the job wasn't usually one of her no gos, since she didn't want her judgement clouded, but as the situation developed she couldn't help herself.

"Thank you," was all she had to say in response, as though she were really touched by her (back-handed) compliment. Partners certainly felt like a stretch but sure, she let her think they were equals, friends on an even playing level.

Perhaps keeping Nadine specifically, more so than the others, at an arm's length had less to do with the control she seemed to hold over them and more with how the girls mere presence exposed her own shortcomings. Something that in turn always left Saskia in the more vulnerable position. With Beckett and Reed she could take up the role of protector, as someone they could potentially go to when they needed help. Deep down she always had this innate desire to be needed, being needed meant you weren't disposable, an assurance she had never been privileged with. It was a pathetic, shameful feeling she carried and she hated that Nadine knew how much of a weakness that was for her. But she supposed there wasn't anything she could really hide from the person who picked her up from rock bottom. At first she believed it was a good thing, that it made their bond stronger, emotionally and physically. People joked about how they acted almost like they were in a relationship not knowing just how close to the truth they actually were. Not that that was ever gonna become anything because they both preferred to not talk about it, just brush it off as girls nights that had gone a little too far. They were both lonely and just wanted to be close to someone else without doing the work of getting to know new people. That was all.

She met her stare with an icy one of her own and said nothing, a confirmation in of itself, the corners of her mouth twitching up in a smirk. When Saskia averted her gaze she watched her just a moment longer, both in amusement and unwavering assertion. It was Nadine’s game they were playing, no matter what else she thought, or the kind of master manipulator she saw herself as, and she’d always have the upper hand. “True,” she gave in and shrugged, attention shifting to the fresh cocktail in front of her. Her demeanor didn’t change, despite knowing they had an audience now, but she did find it cute, how Saskia seemed to put her game face on. “Buttered you up, didn’t I,” she said over her glass, brow raised, and paused for a sip. “I’ll be nice.” As much as she didn’t feel like entertaining this guy, whoever he was, she was curious to see her like this, and how far she’d go to crack a case. If she’d humiliate herself.

Her falling out of their crew had been weird for Saskia to process; having already lost two families by that point, choosing to make these people her new found family had already felt like a big enough gamble from the very beginning. Its dissolution only serving as a harsh reminder as to why she was better off on her own. She had a very strict moral code, things made more sense when she could sort them out between black and white, nothing in between. And these people she had aligned herself with and had even grown to care for fell exactly in that gray spot that shook her core values. When it came down to it she knew deep down that if she let herself be blind to it, if she let the need to belong with someone outweigh her stubborn pride then she would lose herself in the end. So she cut herself off. Namely from Nadine. Who had both been the best and worst thing to come into her life. But even then it seemed they would always end up in each other's orbit eventually; whether as friends, enemies, or some secret unspoken third thing — the way they connected ran deeper than anyone else.

There were two prominent elephants in their relationship they’d never addressed: Saskia’s family, for one. That it’d been Nadine who finally tracked them down when the detective failed. Or maybe she wasn’t looking that hard, scared of disappointment, or rejection, of losing them yet again. Of course she’d be a Lisbon too, a name with more mythological weight to it than even Nadine’s. Then there was the less recent, things they never acknowledged even as they were happening, how despite having separate rooms in Nadine’s old apartment they sometimes ended up in the same bed. It was part of her game, she told herself, another way she could get into Saskia’s head. If that were true maybe they could talk about it. Instead she shoved it down like an embarrassing thing she’d said at a party once, a bad haircut she wanted to forget. It didn’t mean anything and therefore it wasn’t repressed — they were teenagers, doing as teenage girls did. 

"Officially, sure it's over. Seems a bit convenient to me how quick and neat Rosewood PD wrapped up that investigation." She stated, alluding that she hadn't fully stopped her own inquest. Something she knew would bother Nadine, largely because last they discussed the case she had been at the top of the list of suspects. Did Saskia think Nadine had it in her to murder someone? Absolutely. And she never once doubted that she would even take out one of her own so called friends if it meant saving her own ass. But deep deep down she had an inkling that this particular crime had nothing to do with her ex best friend. While she herself hadn't had any personal run ins with Laurel she knew that she had fucked with her friends, not the full scope of just how bad things had been but enough to not like her. It seemed that she had a knack for making enemies. So why was she still pressing the case? Her formal answer would be that her sense of justice wouldn't let her conscience rest until she figured out the truth even if the girl wasn't deserving. But a small part of her needed to prove to herself that her friends had nothing to do with Laurel's murder. That she hadn't surrounded herself with, and had even come to like, people capable of taking a life. Because if one of them had done it what was she supposed to follow? Her loyalty to her friends or to the truth? "When did I accuse you of anything? Though you haven't exactly given me any reason to believe you didn't do it. Especially when you start condescending my work. Feels like misdirection." Admittedly it felt good to have something to check Nadine with. To have something to hold over her that made her feel better as a person because at least she wasn't the one whose friends thought her capable of homicide. The detective shrugged, waving off the disdain in the others tone as she knew she had struck a chord by bringing up an issue she was probably long past. "You're the one that just admitted to the control problem. She had just as big a personality as you. Had her own sway over people. Some of them your people. Maybe there just wasn't enough room in this town for the two of you. A boring motive, but definitely not uncommon." Saskia threw out a random motive to get her talking, knowing that suggesting she would risk her freedom for such a dull reason would be more insulting than the accusation itself.

"Did you take that up with them? Bet they'd love to hear it." As much as she didn't want to agree with Saskia, she found it a bit strange too, how seamlessly and suddenly it all came together. How surreal it was that this thing that'd haunted their relationship for so long could be tidied up in just a few weekends. It didn't make sense either — nobody knew how Laurel ended up in that water and they couldn't ask her, they just had to make peace with it. The only way Nadine could really be implicated in any of it was the fact that she knew her, in some capacity, and, she supposed, the fact that she had a history. Only the others knew of the torture she brought upon poor Laurel: her hair that fell out in clumps, the bacne, the day the diving board suddenly gave beneath her. She never actually owned up to that last one but they all had their suspicions, just as they were suspicious when Laurel disappeared. Sometimes coincidence was just that, coincidence, but who could believe that when they knew what she was capable of? "A better question might be when aren't you. The way you look at me, it's accusatory." For Saskia of all people to call her condescending was laughable, pot calling the kettle black, but she couldn't waste her breath to point that out. From the moment Laurel went missing Nadine was at the top of her suspect list so she didn't know why she wanted to play dumb now, except to tell Nadine she was projecting maybe, claim she was speaking from a guilty conscience. She managed to get under her skin in a way the others couldn't but she didn't want to give her the satisfaction. "Seriously?" Nadine eyed her unimpressed and not at all convinced that was the best she had. That was calculated too, an insult to her character to suggest she was as one-dimensional as a murderous prom queen after school special. "Okay. Let's go with that. I Heather'ed her. How'd she get in the lake? There were no signs of a struggle. She had a swim suit on." Of course she figured Saskia had all the facts already, mulled them over in her head repeatedly, obsessively. She already told her she had nothing to do with it so she'd play along now, illuminate the holes in her case.

"Right. How could I ever imply that you aren't in complete control of every aspect of your own life?" In most aspects Saskia had a realist mindset. Most often people just used a higher power to not take responsability for their own misdeeds or mistakes. But she could understand why people believed in fate because as a kid it was one of the few ideas that got her through her time in the system, to believe that she was going through all the things she did because of a predetermined path. Until she had decided that none of that was fate either but the consequences of bad choices of everyone around her. Perhaps that was what still motivated her at her job, to bring some sense of accountability and justice to others. At least when it came to dealing with Nadine she could say that the other girl never denied the things she had done or would do, no matter how unsavory Saskia found them. She shrugged. "Mostly trying to keep a low profile so the sheriff gets off my back for getting in his way. Though it is a lot less hectic when you're not sidetracked looking for a missing girl." Did Saskia have to throw in that snide remark? Probably not. But it made herself feel better to disturb Nadine's peace a little with a reminder of their past. Sure, their crew seemingly had notions of moving forward with their lives but had any of them actually made any amends on the way there?

"I shuffle my music sometimes." Nadine smirked, fully owning how she hungered for control. Her whole life revolved around it after all, how she could exhibit power: power over others, her image, the kind of men her mother brought home. When she didn't get her way was when all hell broke loose, except she wasn't just a girl throwing a temper tantrum anymore, she was cruel and calculated. The others witnessed her cruelty firsthand, were right to be wary of her. It didn't soften the blow of their betrayal, that those closest to her, some she might even consider friends, could accuse her of murder. "Right. Thank god that's over," she huffed back, never one to mince words around her. Obviously she didn't want Laurel dead, at least it would've been easier on her if she turned up alive, but she couldn't pretend to be all that torn up about it either. Sad and unfortunate as it was, thoughts and prayers to the family etcetera— Laurel being dead didn't change the fact that she was a racist bitch and none of them liked her. Deciding to play with fire a bit, she looked back at Saskia curiously, deviously even. "Still think I killed her?" Just her bringing it up meant she hadn't ruled it out, even if it'd been ages since they buried her, case closed. Typical Saskia, refusing to let them move on. "Tell me, detective, what motive do I have? I wouldn't risk prison orange for just anyone."