going full adult

I'm microwaveable

*puts my cigarettes out on you*

*wuickly smokes it all before you can reach me*

oh a wise guy huh? *rolls up my sleeves* why I oughta…

*wuickly rolls your sleeves back down before you can hit me*

amen

what happened here is that i imagined a post that said this and laughed really hard. but then i imagined nobody appreciating it even though it's gold and i got angry. so i added the certificate seal to make me feel better. like my achievement was recognized. in case that happened

cartoon bully girl shoves me against a wall and goes "awww~ it thinks it's people~" but then i pull her aside and calmly inform her that i'm pretty sure i'm something else wearing the skin of a person and the more i describe it the more horrified and disgusted she becomes until finally she asks what i think i am underneath and i say. i dunno. but its probly something cool, right? and then she calls be a dweeb and shoves me against a wall again and asks me for lunch money. which i respond to with violent sobbing

She started kicking me and hitting me hard because I made her mad and i said "STOP STOP YOU'RE DAMAGING MY VESSEL" and she got really mad and told me to stop saying that and saying i'm a person and i insisted i wasnt and told her she should unzip my clothes and she called me a pervert and hit me more but eventually she did out of sheer curiousity and my body deflated and a small fox squirmed out of the gaps and looked up at her and she was really confused but then she decided the most sound option was to ask the fox for lunch money instead to which i responded with violent sobbing (fox)

Moral Of The Story: The Author Is Actually A Small Fox

As we can all plainly tell, this was inspired by deltarune

NO IT WASNT!!!!!!!!