My Sleep Terrors

I haven’t experienced sleep terrors in many years now, and I definitely see it was being caused by stress & anxiety. I feel better at managing my stress.

I do occasionally wake up with very mild experiences, but its nowhere near the potency of my original experiences, and I wouldn’t consider them terrors.

A bus is on the way to Tailand, and I’m on it (for whatever reason). I didn’t mean to get on, but I can’t get off until I arrive at Tailand, and will then have to take a bus home.

The bus is filled with humanoid animals who can talk, animal-crossing style - but there’s also just a regular dog who can’t talk.

There’s a variety of spieces, and one of em, the wolf, is a big dick. A goat becomes my friend but he’s shy and nobody likes him.

I have a really good seat with my goat friend. A family behind us really wants our seats and harass us, which becomes the sub-plot. (Spoilers: They eventually get our seats)

As the bus goes on, people get stabbed slowly one-by-one over a long period. How this happens quietly in a bus remains a mystery, but a body turns up in the middle of the bus and everyone is shocked. This is a murder mystery.

I immediately blame the wolf, he gives off all the wrong signals and he’s genuinely scary to look at. But nothing definitive so it can’t be proven, and the ride goes on.

Another person dies, still no clues.

3rd murder, the knife is missing. We’re looking for it, and finding pieces, but we can’t find the last piece. We’re searching frantically, and I’m yelling at the wolf, it has to be him. It becomes really intense.

As I turn a corner, I bump into the regular dog. We’re both shocked, and we scream - except we both scream in a human voice. I immediately have a revelation and try to force the dog to speak again, who is now sweating nervously. I yell, scream, and try to force its mouth open to speak, but it keeps fake barking. Eventually it admits to being able to speak, and admits to being the murderer all along.

--------------

Bus to Tailand. Dream.

--------------

I woke up in the middle of the night, thinking I was being shocked by static electricity. I was certain someone had planted something on me, that caused me to feel these minor shocks. I even decided to move my MacBook Pro far away from me, in case it was the one causing it.

I have experienced no major sleep terrors in 2016. I have been more relaxed recently, and I feel the lack of stress has contributed to my recovery from sleep terrors.

This event of sleepwalking happened in March 2015. I “woke up” very late at night, with the clear impression that I was having visitors, and they were right outside my door.

Every night, I always place the books and clothes I need for the next day on the floor, right next to my bed.

My body felt very weak and sluggish, but my mind was in a panic. I had determined that my apartment was dirty and not presentable to visitors, solely due to the books and clothes I had prepared. I reached out of my bed, and pushed everything under the bed to hide it.

After pushing the clothes and books under my bed, I feel asleep. I woke up the following morning completely unable to find my books and clothes. It was only when I found it all under the bed that I remembered the events that took place during the night.

Last night I began sleepwalking. I “woke up” facing a cup on my shelf that has been there for years now. For some reason, I was convinced that this cup had been placed by an intruder, and I began feeling an intense sense of horror.

I got up from my bed, and spent at least 10 minutes looking in horror at this cup. To me, the cup was clear evidence that I was not safe in my own home, that I was being watched. I can not remember whether I made any sound during those 10 minutes.

The sense of horror was incredibly real, I have never felt this kind of horror before. As I’ve searched online for people experiencing similar things, I’ve often read that sleep terrors are harmless. I disagree. The emotions are real and the feeling of helplessness and terror is real, and they don’t become any less real by being temporary.

After the 10 minute period, I came to my senses (although still in a sleep state), took the cup down from the shelf and placed it on the floor. I then went back to sleep.

When I woke up I had no recollection of the events until I saw the cup on the floor.

Possible causes: Fear of being watched, fear of physical harm, fear of losing control, anxiety

This is just a short journal of some of the sleep terrors I’ve begun experiencing since the start of 2015.

The people I’ve spoken to about my sleep terrors reply to my stories with a sense of skepticism - that the stories are made up since sleep walking and sleep terrors are uncommon and often the butt of a joke.

For a while, I also thought sleep terrors weren't a real thing, but I’ve begun experiencing them a lot (possibly due to stress). With no outlet to express my feelings about these sleep terrors I’ve turned to this blog.

While I would like the sleep terrors to go away, I also think they are immensely interesting. They tell me a lot about my fears.