the wolf eats you one day...

teresa lisbon is less "if you dont cheer and clap for him ill fucking blow this whole building up" and more like how cat owners describe their cats. this is my fuckass insane blonde man (rescue) (found in the garbage) who we have spent $2000 of the government funding on for tea bags and he has almost gotten me fired 20 times this week because he refuses to stop doing psyops on government officials for entertainment inbetween scrapbooking for his literal red string theory board and pissing me off on purpose. Yes I'm madly in love with him that's not the point right now

the idea of going to the movies alone being like sad and pathetic is crazy to me like thats barely a social event to me. If you try to talk to me during a movie at the movies I will kill you.

[ID: A photograph featuring wall tiles. In a gap, a shark is doodled on the grout. An arrow points to the shark from writing saying “grout white shark.” End ID.]

if i ever had godlike powers over the nature of animals i'd just make crabs smarter. like on par with crows or something. you'll walk out onto the pier at night and see a group of crabs working together to drag an unconscious man into the water. you can't help him now. he's gone.

obi-wan kenobi only looks like a respectable, even-tempered rule-follower because he's standing next to Anakin "what are rules" Skywalker and Ahsoka "i know the rules but i don't give a shit" Tano. the moment he's alone, and not being forced to keep anyone in check, he is JUST as chaotic as the other two, if not more because he DOES know the rules and he DOES give a fuck so the fact that he's breaking them means he REALLY wants to ruin someone's day

the thing about that weird stuff americans call cheese is that if you heat it a little it becomes an excellent burger condiment despite its failings in every other area. such is the fate of the american cultural product

the American 'cheese' slice was engineered by our best scientific minds (all borrowed from Germany ofc) to melt perfectly onto a burger and for nothing else. Its only purpose is to compliment the one true product of the American people. The hamburger. (also borrowed from Germany)

reeling a little at the implication that the Kraft Single was a product of operation paperclip

just thought about star wars and teared up

what if there was a franchise that was about hope, and the relationships between fathers and their children, and the relationships between mentors and their students, and redemption, and fighting against evil even when it all seems lost, and ordinary people believing in the possibility of a better and brighter future, and clinging to your culture even when darkness threatens to overcome you, and being thrust into situations that are so much bigger than you but still doing your best to make even the smallest difference, and fighting against oppression even when it’s all you’ve ever known, and watching the universe change around you and being unable to stop it, and being let down by the people closest to you but still being able to forgive them, and having faith in the people around you even when you don’t have faith in yourself. and also there are laser swords.

of course, the best part of any character's corruption arc is their cool new outfit

i don't support all women's rights & wrongs some of you are terfs