virginia

i am so unbearably, uncontrollably, mind numbingly horny. and it’s not just “hmmm im in the mood right now”. no. i mean like, horny.

so horny to the point that it’s getting in the way of my life. i don’t know what’s happening to me, but whatever it is is driving me beyond crazy.

i spent basically the entire afternoon yesterday— from about 4pm to 3am— touching myself on and off. im insatiable and ravenous and for some reason i still can’t get enough.

you’dve thought that masterbatory marathon would’ve been enough to alleviate the urge for at least a little bit, right? no. since i woke up the following day, my mind has constantly been sex sex sex.

throughout the entirety of class today i couldn’t stop rubbing my thighs together in search of friction, my mind occasionally darting off from the lesson and drifting off into lewd, erotic fantasys.

i don’t know what’s happening to me. in the most genuine way possible, i feel like im in heat. hell, i had no idea this kind of thing even happened to people outside of fanfictions and shitty pornos.

but it does— and it’s happening to me. i feel delirious and weak, and I can’t think straight

fuck, even right now all i can think of right now is how excited i am to touch myself later tonight; im literally throbbing at the thought of it. i have to constantly fight my own body’s urges, swatting my own hands away from drifting downwards.

and the cherry on top?

i can’t do a single thing about it. im a virgin, for starters. its not like im a prude though; if the correct opportunity were to present itself id immediately jump on it (figuratively and literally). it’s my circumstances.

even though im in school im still living with my parents, and if i thought it was difficult enough to stop them from hovering over me and giving me the time to take care of my own needs, who knows how difficult it would be to find someone else to.

the second issue is finding somebody to do it with. im not ugly, not at all, and i know i shouldn’t have any issue with finding a half decent looking man to do it with, but its so much harder said than done.

i just feel like i have no choice but to let my resolve waver and give in to my baser urges. god, even writing this ive halfway lost my mind in the whirlwind that is my hormones.