The Humanity of a Monster: Lu Chen (Evan) Character Exploration
NOTE: Everything written is entirely my personal interpretation. Includes spoilers for around the first year of content according to the CN server timeline and briefly touches on topics such as abuse and attempted suicide.
My personal lore is I originally got really into Light and Night because of Evan's writing. I don't think anything I write could do this character justice because he is the fictional character I've been most fascinated by ever. I also wasn't originally planning this to be a series when I first wrote my Sariel essay but I've been having a lot of fun with these and now I feel like I did my man Osborn dirty because this Evan essay is 2k words longer, oops. Hopefully I'll write Charlie and Jesse versions soon...? I procrastinate too much, see you next year haha.
♥︎ = dialogues by Lu Chen. ♥︎ = dialogues by MC. Other quotes are internal narrations. Translations for all the excerpts included are by @aishangotome ♡
CHAPTER I: OUT OF CONTROL
Being raised in the Blood Clan, a vampire clan that has been preying on humans to ensure their own survival and attain immortality while manipulating clan members into their grand “objective” vision, Lu Chen has been under extreme control his whole life, forced into tolerance and obedience in order to survive. This control has also led to him suffering many losses throughout his life.
Firstly, he lost his father who neglected him and never demonstrated the love of a parent, leaving Lu Chen without a sense of love. He initially believed that love could be earned through perfectionism, but he never earnt the love of his father regardless of his hard work and achievements or how much he followed the hope in his heart. Instead, he was often punished and abused for his sincere attempts to connect with his father. It’s not only that his father didn’t understand him, but that he didn’t understand his father either. Therefore, not only did he not understand what it felt like to be loved, but he also didn’t know what it meant to love others. When sincerity could be treated so meaninglessly, hope would only lead to disappointment, promises could be so easily broken, and people could just get up and leave at any time, what was the point of striving for love, especially when it would never last forever anyway? When his life is permeated by constant loss, what even is love in the first place?
The second thing I lost was a mechanical pocket watch. The night after I threw it into the fireplace, I couldn’t sleep. The wind howled outside my window, and I could feel my temples throbbing, the rhythm strangely similar to the ticking of that watch. That night, I felt like I was about to become a pocket watch myself, an evil, cursed watch that would lead people astray and be condemned by all. I longed to become it, desperately so. And from the expression on its face as it broke free from my grasp and eagerly leaped into the roaring flames, I saw an exhilaration that made me ashamed of my own inadequacy. (6* Card 幻光)
His father had a keen interest in mechanics, so Lu Chen associates the mechanical pocket watch with his father. Throwing it into the fireplace is an act of severing ties with him, the same way his father severed ties with Lu Chen first. By throwing the watch into the fire, he seemingly takes control and allows himself to react for once, a stark contrast to his usual tolerant and obedient temperament. However, he loathes himself for this action because he doesn’t see himself as any different to his father, represented by how he sees both his father leaving him and him reacting in the same way through the act of throwing the watch. He might see his father as a monster, but by extension, he also sees himself as a monster too, complicit in his family’s crimes. Is he really similar to his father though, if he never understood him in the first place and tortures himself every day for values he inherently disagrees with?
He also lost his pet rabbit which he harboured several complicated feelings for. Caring for her ignited a fear that she would grow tired of him and leave him one day, reflecting his fear of loss and low self-worth. What’s the point of love if all that follows is inevitable loss, and what’s the point of life without love, especially when he seems to be the reason for all of this loss? He could only blame himself for his existence.
But I couldn’t bring myself to blame her. My possessiveness was the knife that killed her. Those countless sleepless nights, I longed for that knife to be at my own throat, to use my tainted blood to repay her purity. (6* Card 幻光)
Meanwhile, he also held beliefs about his existence being a burden due to the loss of his mother, who passed away in circumstances related to the Blood Clan and also had her freedoms stripped away from her when she was still alive.
♥︎: I often wonder if it was fate, that maybe I shouldn’t have been born. That way, we would both be freer, and I wouldn’t owe you anything. You wouldn’t have to constantly endure and suppress your feelings, and you could leave this family without any burdens, returning to your old self. Your life would definitely be much better than it is now. I’ve seen photos of you from before. You were smiling in many of them. It’s a shame I never witnessed that. (6* Card 幻光)
Lu Chen grew up in an environment where “love” was characterised by possession, objectification, and transaction; a sense of love that completely lacked sincerity. As someone who felt like he could only survive through perpetuating lies, he has always yearned deep down for a sense of sincerity that he couldn’t find in his surroundings, and which he was unable to acknowledge in himself.
He loathed himself for his tolerance and obedience that were cultivated by the controlling conditions he grew up in, even when deep down, he opposed the actions of the Blood Clan. This extreme sense of control led to a lack of love but plenty of loss, instead leading him to lose control to the point where he was willing to give up his own life to prevent future loss. He has never felt like he has had any control throughout his entire life, and in turn, he was also losing himself. However, due to his attachments, hatred for the circumstances the innocent people and beings around him ended up in, and desire to discover the truth, he no longer wanted to be controlled and used as a weapon anymore. Instead, he’ll be in control of himself.
CHAPTER II: CONTROLLED BY HIMSELF
♥︎: For the past twenty years, I’ve been a blade in the hands of others. I don’t want to continue like this anymore. (6* Card 幻光)
To avoid future loss, he establishes his own control in an attempt to be free from letting others dictate his life. Lu Chen’s interest in mechanical watches is a symbol of this as assembling machines gives him a sense of power in a safe, predictable, and fixed environment that he always lacked.
♥︎: You can build exactly what you want within a fixed framework. In that process, everything is under your control. (2022 Marie Claire Interview)
Out of all the possible objects he could be interested in, the symbol of a watch is significant because it relates especially to a control over time. After being neglected and trying to compensate through hard work and perfectionism, he has been independent since a young age, having no one to rely on but himself. He has always been chasing after time without slowing down, projecting the illusion that he is highly in control over his life. He comes across as perfect or even robotic, and his success is evident through his career accomplishments which include establishing his own business while studying overseas and becoming the CEO of Wanzhen at 26 years old.
♥︎: Conservatism is a product of comfort. To innovate, you must abandon years of ease. Those who hesitate will be abandoned by time. (Main Story 5-13)
This sense of control doesn’t only apply to time, but also over his own emotions. He grew up being terrified of how powerful the relationship between love and loss can be. He needs to have control to prevent loss, but it’s impossible to have control over love and emotion. When everything he cares for is destroyed by his touch, then he might as well not assert his presence at all. He has become numb to his own feelings, finding it easier to survive by suppressing his sinful emotions and desires instead. However, the rare instances he has acted out his hidden desires have made him feel more alive than ever.
I had never dared to look directly at the sun; it always made me feel guilty. But that day was different. That day was different. Its merciful gaze made me feel that no matter what I did, even if it was depravity and sin, I would be forgiven. I remembered the warm embrace of my childhood that I didn’t want to let go of. My heart raced, my whole body tensed up, and a hot current surged up my spine and dripped down my body. In that moment, my brain went blank. The feeling was both awkward and strange, but my body was filled with primitive and straightforward joy— a joy that had long since disappeared, since I don’t know when. (6* Card 心为形役)
Ironically, the more he tries to escape the expectations of others, the more trapped he becomes by his own perfectionism. His perfectionism was originally born out of a desire to receive others’ approval, yet in an attempt to free himself of other people’s expectations, he has only become more controlling of himself. But does he truly have a sense of control when he navigates life as a game of survival with no aim, meaning or purpose? Where is that sense of control when life threatens to slip away from his fingers at any moment?
As a consequence of this control, Lu Chen has come to find no inherent meaning in life, adopting a nihilistic view of the world. It doesn’t necessarily matter whether he lives or dies, he just wants to carry out his singular goal to seek vengeance on the Blood Clan… and then what? He doesn’t even know himself, because instead of fearing death, he views death as a release to life’s suffering. He isn’t living, but is merely just surviving.
♥︎: When you’re feeling down or finding things difficult, just fantasise about the wonderful life after achieving your goals. I wonder if this method will work for you?
♥︎: After achieving my goals? At that time, perhaps nothing else will matter anymore. (6* Card 繁荫秘语)
Since the beginning, his existence has always just been about survival. However, this leads to him suppressing himself, losing sight of his own desires, and feeling extremely disconnected from the world. There’s always a sense of distance in his interactions with everyone, with the reason he wears glasses being to hide his gaze from others. He fears being seen for his true self beyond the mask he wears to survive, because deep down he wants to be accepted for who he truly is.
What even is his true self in the first place? His identities have all been decided for him by other people, and he adapts to these expectations accordingly. His family wants him to carry the bloodline, his grandfather sees him as a useful weapon, and his employees view him as a perfect gentleman of a CEO who could do no wrong. He doesn’t seem to think that these identities necessarily constitute his true self, but that performing these expectations are inevitable in life for everyone.
♥︎: Performance is to life as a shadow is to a person. It's a part of us we can't avoid. (Main Story 2-24 Night Ending)
This then raises concerns about sincerity. Is he being sincere, or is he merely presenting a beautiful lie to the world in order to conceal his true self? His own view of reality has also been affected by the Blood Clan’s operations which involve revising history to manipulate members of the clan into their one and only “objective” vision. How can he discern between truth and lies when reality can be so easily manipulated? What is the truth of this world? He wants to escape from the Blood Clan’s control, and yet he is still fixated on a singular vision of destroying them and seeking truth to everything. But perhaps there is no objective truth and everyone’s subjective feelings form their own personal truths, including his own, and the reason it’s difficult for him to distinguish between truth and lies is because his own feelings are so suppressed. He thinks he’s taking control of his own fate, but as long as he continues to restrain himself and his emotions, he’ll only continue to be controlled by others.
The issue is, Lu Chen is unable to acknowledge his own sincerity because he does not see himself as human. He rejects and is disgusted by the ways of the Blood Clan, but he also feels like he doesn’t fit into the human world. It’s not only that he doesn’t see himself as human, but that he actively tries to restrain his humanity.
There’s a common motif where he perceives himself through animals— rabbits because they share his red eyes but reflect an innocence he longs for, and horses because they are also tamed into obedience just like he was. These animals represent innocence and purity, the same qualities he had as a child but gradually seemed to have “lost,” and connecting with them brings him an array of conflicting feelings. He sees animals as a mirror to himself, a shell of who he once was, and something that he aspires to. He feels disgusted with himself for losing that purity but still aspires to be good and gentle, even though he also tries to dispel those same qualities from himself. He wishes for the freedom of these innocent beings and for them to not be too softhearted because of his belief that the world is inherently cruel and cares for no one, wanting them to escape before they suffer the same nihilistic fate as him. He also views himself as being an accomplice to the world’s cruelty even though he was essentially a victim of this cruelty himself, so he doesn’t know if he can take care of anything so pure in worries that he’ll contaminate them with his darkness. Everything about him is so push-pull, and it’s the exact conflicting thought process he holds towards love.
She always looked at me with those pitying red eyes, as if she knew all my secrets. Her ears were like a pair of wings. After I took her in, I started looking in the mirror. I couldn’t understand how those red eyes could be so pure, so full of intense, extravagant emotions. Even her vacant stare was captivating. She was like a mirror, reflecting my own emptiness and corruption. She pitied me, and I provided for her. This delicate balance prevented me from lowering my head in shame before her. Whenever I stroked her soft fur, a deep melancholy would wash over me. I was afraid that one day, she would see through me and grow tired of me. So I started practicing smiling in the mirror, trying to become someone who could offer her a future. Occasionally, I would even see a glimmer of purity in my own eyes, though only for a fleeting moment. (6* Card 幻光)
The core foundation of Lu Chen and MC’s dynamic is that he sees remnants of what he’s lost in her— his past self before he was abused into becoming a nihilistic “monster.” The animal motifs emphasise that his relationship with the MC is the first time he has felt a human connection. He views MC as his little rabbit, and therefore harbours all of those complicated feelings towards her as outlined above, such as feeling that he’s too much of a monster to get close to someone so pure. As someone so detached from life, he views himself as a monster submerged in the depths of the ocean, while MC is the sky, the stars, and everything he could never dare to reach or even gaze upon. In this world, he’s merely an observer who thinks he doesn’t deserve to participate.
But isn’t it very telling of his character that he doesn't want anyone else to suffer the same fate as him, his mother, or his pet rabbit, and wishes that they can achieve freedom? And doesn’t the fact that he can still see parts of himself reflected in these beings he deems as innocent and pure, point towards the same innocence and purity existing within himself?
Perhaps in a distorted environment the human heart will become alienated, but the love in the heart itself is always sincere and beautiful, like transparent and flawless glass. (6* Card 心为形役)
He only fixates on everything he lacks and blames himself for the circumstances he grew up in, showing that he doesn’t accept himself. Being unable to get close to the MC is a representation of him being unable to get in touch with himself and with the innocence and purity of his human heart before it was corrupted. He has never pursued his own desires, wants or needs. He has never followed his heart. For him, loving her is a difficult yet active choice of loving himself, as a human, as a monster, or without any of these labels entirely, but just as himself, and that requires accepting himself in all of his identities, no matter how dark and treacherous his inner feelings may be.
While Lu Chen has always struggled with being too controlled, his development isn’t necessarily about letting go of control, but about regaining it. Losing control made him suicidal, and being too controlled made him nihilistic. He hates himself for his tolerance, but that only makes him intolerant of himself. In reality, all he is doing is rebelling against his natural instincts, which only proves his distinct humanity.
Sometimes, it’s the rebellion against instinct and nature that truly showcases the unique brilliance of humanity, distinct from beasts. (Chapter 17 抗争的勇气)
Although Lu Chen doesn’t want to assert his presence onto other people, he actually deeply yearns for an intimate connection where he can be seen for who he truly is. It’s not that he doesn’t have feelings, but that he continues to neglect his own emotions and desires due to his own self-hatred. Suppressing his own emotions is also an act of suppressing his own memories, especially the fondness he felt during his childhood.
I’ve learned to stop forcing anything. Even if I remembered, what was missed would still be missed, the places where I was destined to act foolishly would still come, and nothing could be changed. (6* Card 心为形役)
As a result, he now holds zero nostalgia or sentimentality for his childhood despite finding it difficult to let go of his attachments to his parents at the time. This also means he’s suppressing all of the hope and optimism he has a child that crushed himself and left him without an understanding of love. He continues to push away every semblance of hope he originally had as he feels that clinging onto his feelings would make it more difficult for him to survive in such a twisted world. He can’t look back on his past fondly now, and therefore also has no reason to look forward to the future.
The MC, in contrast to Lu Chen, is optimistic. Their dynamic involves many philosophical debates in which Lu Chen struggles to find meaning in life while the MC presents a more positive and hopeful outlook, constantly challenging his point of view.
♥︎: I read a passage once, though I forget which book it was from. ‘The world you encounter will be a desperate lamentation. The only thing you can do at first is cry. Everything in the world will make you cry: light, hunger, and anger.’ Life always brings more pain than joy, so death can also be a kind of liberation. People in the world suffer over the loss of loved ones or relatives. The essence of it is their own suffering, the suffering of being human. But Professor Moran will never again be troubled by such pain, and that’s not a bad thing either.
♥︎: About that quote you used earlier… It’s from the famous journalist Oriana Fallaci’s essay, Letter to a Child Never Born. But perhaps you don’t remember the parts that come after.
♥︎: Then can you tell me what the rest of it says?
I looked into his eyes and recited the passage word for word.
♥︎: ‘The world you encounter will be a desperate lamentation. The only thing you can do at first is cry. Everything in the world will make you cry: light, hunger, and anger. It will be weeks, months, before you can open your mouth and smile. Before a giggle escapes your throat. But you must never lose faith. When the smile comes, when the laughter comes, you must bring that smile, that laughter to me.’ Lu Chen, I will definitely show you the other side of life… One day, I will surely bring that smile, that laughter, to you.
Lu Chen’s eyes flickered intensely, then rippled with gentle affection.
♥︎: Actually, you’ve already done that. (5* Card 弦音似你)
They may seem like ideological opposites, but she’s also his “little rabbit,” meaning he sees parts of himself in her. She’s extremely selfless and tolerant, especially of him. No matter how conflicted she feels towards the way he keeps pushing and pulling from her in the beginning, she always ends up coming back to him. Lu Chen, being very selfless and tolerant himself, has the urge to shield her from the Blood Clan, who want to use MC as a weapon.
If someone had shielded me from everything back then, would I be different now? He didn’t know. But at this moment, he desperately didn’t want the girl to suffer the same fate. (Main Story Chapter 3 雨夜梦回)
Lu Chen seems like a walking oxymoron. Every single facet and detail of his actions seem to contradict itself, and his relationship with the MC is also defined by this confusing push-pull dynamic. He “tortures” the MC through illusory worlds because he wants her to push him away after realising that he’s a “monster.” However, he also deploys these illusions because he wants to pull her in, keeping her close. He’s actually testing her strength and resolve, wanting her to become stronger so that he can’t hurt her. These illusions are both an act of wanting to push her away and wanting to keep her close, and these two conflicting standpoints merge together because his overall view is that if it comes to a matter of life and death, he wants her to save herself and let him die. He wants her to understand that he’s a “monster” that does not deserve to live, while also wanting her to become stronger for her own sake.
But isn’t it ironic? He wants her to let him die, yet the act of helping her is quite literally a demonstration of him possessing a will to live. Yet again, the whole thing is a contradiction. For the first time in his life, he finds himself actively helping the “enemy” side; the side that represents light and life, over his bloodline’s side; the side that represents night and death. The Blood Clan wanting to use MC as a weapon to advance their own goals is a parallel to how Lu Chen has been used as a weapon his whole life. Through rejecting this agenda he is instead prioritising the MC, actively choosing the more difficult path of life and love over the more convenient path of death and tolerance. Most notably, by choosing the MC, he is also choosing himself for the first time.
Choosing himself also involves letting go of the idea imposed by the Blood Clan that the truth of the world involves a grand, all-encompassing vision of the universe, and instead starting to realise that he has the power to form his own truth free from being controlled by anyone else. There is no objective truth in the world, and this can be seen through people holding different perspectives towards the same thing. For example, while some people might criticise MC’s designs, Lu Chen finds the beauty in them.
♥︎: Aesthetics are inherently personal. If some people don't accept your work, naturally there will be others who like it very much. (Main Story 1-19 Night Ending)
There’s also a sense of beauty in the different perspectives MC introduces to him. The fact that there exists a world beyond his own perceptions that have confined himself to misery genuinely invigorates him, because it shows that there is the potential to change. Life doesn’t have to remain stagnant because there are so many possibilities that can enrich his worldview and bring meaning to his life. Being an observer and a participant go hand in hand, and different observations lead to different ways of engaging with life. This gives him a future to look forward to.
♥︎: In the days we’ve shared, your companionship has been just like playing the cello—each and every time brings me a completely different experience. These minute differences are exactly what form my expectations for the future. I believe it will be the same moving forward. Are you willing to join me in this beautiful cycle? (6* Card 隽永契约)
His truth doesn’t have to be a grand universal vision, but can just comprise of a collection of ordinary little moments stored in his memories. His development is based on reconnecting with the past that he has lost memory of, which involves discovering what it means to feel nostalgic and reminiscent of moments gone by with a newfound hope and ability to find beauty in the little things in life. He uses the term ‘hygge’ to describe this concept.
♥︎: Hygge doesn't really have an exact translation. The general idea is to find those subtle, cosy moments in life and gain a sense of happiness from them. (Main Story 5-10)
His collection of such moments includes the brilliant stars seen from a bell tower on a summer night, the swirling snowflakes by a wishing fountain in winter, the colourful fairy lights illuminating a forest campsite, and the single lamp burning late into the night in his office. (2022 Marie Claire Interview)
These memories he accumulates of all the beautiful little things in life are a representation of his subjective feelings, and by allowing himself to feel, he’s regaining control over himself. He has always struggled with distinguishing between truth and lies, sincerity and deception. However, there isn’t just one version of truth or reality, and it varies depending on each individual’s own feelings. Prioritising his feelings gives him the control to form his own truth, free from any other narratives forced upon him.
♥︎: Is it possible that “truth” is actually a subjective feeling?
♥︎: A subjective feeling?
♥︎: Because human memory is limited, we can only choose to remember certain things. And those things often carry strong subjective emotions. For example, take food. even though I go to the cafeteria every day, I can never remember what I ate yesterday. On the contrary, I can remember that rainy night from long ago, when we hid under the eaves and ate that bowl of red bean ice together. Because the latter was infused with emotion, it allowed me to perceive something real within a dull life.
Lu Chen listened to me quietly, then thoughtfully turned his gaze back to the old television, his fingers interlacing with mine.
♥︎: If you put it that way, then this moment is also a form of truth.
♥︎: Right now, I am holding your hand. No matter how much time passes, I will remember how this feels. To me, this is the truth that I have recorded. Correct?
(5* Card 阅尽晨昏)
Instead of always looking ten steps ahead towards the future outcome, focusing on the present moment in front of him is what truly brings him joy. For someone who has always had no concept of time and has been constantly racing against the clock without actually getting anywhere, he can only truly move forward by slowing down. This allows him to reconnect with his inner child that he gradually lost sight of, which deep down is a kind and gentle boy who survived through hope. Although the present moment is fleeting, it doesn’t mean that these moments are devoid of meaning. As long as they’re preserved in his memories, they’ll last for a long time and form the foundations of a future he can always look forward to.
Lu Chen has always longed for the ordinary, especially as someone who grew up in a world of chaos and was left with many complex and contradictory feelings. He has always relished in the ordinary moments of life, even concealing his identity as the new CEO from MC in the beginning because he wanted to savour the little moments they shared together a little longer, regardless of his identity as her work superior.
♥︎: The power hidden beneath the ordinary will always have a day to reveal itself. Moreover, from a long-term perspective, it's often the ordinary that creates more surprises. (Main Story 1-19 Night Ending)
MC’s acceptance of his true self allows him to feel normal. Their dynamic involves seeing and accepting each other for every part of themselves in their rawest forms, no matter how chaotically taboo or messy their inner lives may be. He has always feared being seen for his deepest vulnerabilities, but she shows him that he doesn’t have to be perfect to be worthy of love and acceptance. He has always refrained from being possessive due to his own self-hatred, but he can’t stop himself from indulging in her. Instead of reining himself under tight control, following his heart for the first time leads him to a world of sincerity, allowing himself to be truly seen for the first time in his life. Even his ability of casting illusions represents the intimacy that only they share together, as within illusions they cannot see the outside, while those on the outside cannot see them either.
♥︎: In this twisted world, you make me feel normal again. (6* Card 宴色诱惑)
Lu Chen is all too familiar with playing different roles in different scenarios, but instead of constantly agonising over trying to search for his "true self," the road to sincerity involves accepting the various faces he shows to the world as all being parts of himself. They all comprise different aspects of his identity, and they don't necessarily contradict each other because they all share the common underlying intention of caring for others. Maybe being gentle and caring is his truest self.
♥︎: But I think that when people hide aspects of themselves and choose the most appropriate side to show others, it’s often an act of gentleness. No matter what kind of person you choose to be in front of me, I will cherish that intention. That’s enough for me.
I stared blankly at his smile, then suddenly saw the light. The reason people take on “roles” and cannot always act solely according to their own feelings is simply because they care about the person in front of them. Because they care about someone, they can’t help but consider and look after that person’s feelings, and they become especially concerned with how they are perceived. (6* Card 罪爱)
Throughout the initially intense push-pull dynamic of their relationship, MC has always viewed Lu Chen as a person of uncertainty, but the one certainty for her is his eyes that are always full of sincerity; his red eyes that signify the monster that he can’t bear to show to the world. She finds acceptance in what he can’t accept himself for. From the very first time they met, she has always only detected light and sincerity in his eyes.
Perhaps because I was still shaken, I didn't know whether I should trust this stranger. I tried hard to see if there was any other intention in his eyes. However, there wasn't. Behind the gold-rimmed glasses, his eyes held only a reassuring smile. (Main Story 1-07)
His calm and bright eyes also seemed to understand my thoughts, crossing the crowd and looking at me. Like that warm light that shone in the dark elevator car. (Main Story 2-13)
I could always vaguely see a vast and magnificent sea beneath his calm eyes. Instinct told me that arrogance and hypocrisy didn't flow there. (Main Story 5-01)
Even when she has tried to search for signs of insincerity in his gaze, she has never been able to find it. This again ties into how everyone has different perspectives towards the same thing. Lu Chen may see himself as a monster who lacks sincerity, and yet, MC has always seen and accepted him as a human being who is full of sincerity. His own negative view of himself is not an objective truth, and MC’s different perspective of him expands not only his worldview, but also his view of himself. Therefore, she also introduces to him a new perspective on love. Love is not defined by possession, transactions, or blood relations, but by sincerity.
♥︎: Then how can you be sure that the boy isn’t, at his core, just like the people in his family?
♥︎: To survive, he had to become the person they expected him to be.
♥︎: I… I’m not sure, but I don’t think he is. I can feel from the story that he didn’t hurt others; he was only hurting and suppressing himself. He won’t become a cruel person; he just had bad luck.
Lu Chen’s eyes moved slightly, losing focus for a moment. He looked at me with a gaze I had never seen before, full of sorrow and loneliness. That gaze was like countless burning thorns, leaving a dense pain in my heart. Suddenly… I really wanted to hug him.
♥︎: Loving someone is unconditional. Love isn’t possession, not a transaction, but giving freedom. It’s being willing to believe in someone wholeheartedly, even if you don’t fully understand them.
♥︎: A relationship bound by blood cannot be called “love.” Not everyone who gives birth to a child is qualified to be a parent. Love isn’t possession, not coercion, but giving peace of mind and refuge, it’s trust and reliance. That is a bond deeper than blood. (6* Card 光暖秋林)
Not only does he now understand what it means to receive love, but he now also knows what it means to love someone else too. He is no longer controlled by the expectations of the Blood Clan, because he’s now following his own heart that has always been brimming with sincerity. MC’s sense of hope is a reflection of Lu Chen’s own true heart that he has always denied yet longed for, and loving her is ultimately an act of loving himself.
♥︎: People say that the wedding day is the day a girl is at her most beautiful in her life, but I don’t agree with that statement. If after getting married, it becomes difficult for a girl to return to her former beauty, then marriage sounds more like a disaster instead. In our time together, I can feel that you are becoming more mature and powerful every day than before. The pace of growth doesn’t stop because of marriage, and I think you wouldn’t choose that kind of marriage either. I hope you are stronger and more confident every day than before, that is true beauty. So in my eyes, you are becoming more beautiful every day. (6* Card 隽永契约 Phone Call)
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