Suicidal

Sa pagtapos sa bakasyon, mao usab ang pagsugod sa akong pag-inusara. Apan unsaon? Gipili man nimo nga muingon ug "ba-bye na...ato lang tan-awon kung naay pa bay higayon nga magkita ta"

I sat there with my friends at the corner, the perfect spot where I could watch you and your pretty little things. We giggled as we talked about you. They told me to approach you but I swore that's the thing that I'll never do. Well, maybe a simple hi and hello will do but I am sure you'll see what's in my heart when a single word comes out. I am certain that you hate me as much as this society hates me that's why I'd never try. I can tell that you wish to never meet me on the streets just like this one time that I forced myself to act like I didn't notice you walked past me. But, I feel so much pain every time you do what I do. It feels like all my insides are crushed when I'm invisible to you. I couldn't handle the pain but all I could do is spill ink on this sheet so thin. It's just impossible to confront you. I just hope for that one day when our eyes meet, you'll see right through me what I wrote on the day I couldn't keep it in.

Do the thing that will provide you a living instead of doing what you love. It is for you to LIVE. But, why don't I feel alive at all?

I DON'T LIKE THIS WHOLE DAMN THING!

I said yes though i don't really want it. I was just afraid that if i said no i'd be a burden. Now, here i am thinking of something stupid.