I just read your post asking about writing for kaz brekker and YES YES YES
How about a kaz brekker x fem!reader who is a crow and is really sunshine AND badass (like awesome thief but also super friendly, funny and kind with everyone). They can be in a relationship or just pining, and Kaz is like trying to share more with her and trying to get over his touch aversion with her but it's not easy, so she's very patient and supporting with him, because he is only thinking about how weak he is that he "can't even hold hands with his loved one" and that stuff.
Maybe fluff/ flangst? (whatever works for you! I just want some kazzle dazzle contentāØ)
Thank you a looot you're awesome<3
Warnings; Heavy angst, a bit of fluff at the end. Mention of injury.
Brief message for requester: I love the way you think, and please forgive me for any mistakes in the writing, and let me know what you think (its been ages since i have written anything)
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As I walk into the room, seeing Inej and Jesper sat around a table, I cheerily smile at them. āAnd how is everyone this wonderful evening?ā My cheery demeanor usually putting everyone in a better mood. My smile drops as they glance, almost sadly, at each other and then back at me. I raise an inquisitive brow at them, before noticing the lack of a certain presence. āWhereās Kaz?ā
Jesper lets out a deep sigh, shaking his head as he looks at the stairs that lead to Kazās room. He leans in, his voice low, āLocked away in his room, hasnāt been a good day for him, Iām afraid.ā A tinge of sadness runs through my heart.
Iād been working with Kaz for a good while, not just with him on jobs but on his touch aversion. Iām patient with him, letting him move at his own pace to never push him farther than heās willing. He has his good days and his bad days. Inej informed me that as they were walking down the street, somebody had fallen into him; triggering his PTSD. This was a bad day.
I nod understandingly before making my way to the stairs, Jesper turns briskly. āDonāt, (Y/N).. Itās really not a good time.ā I shake my head at his words, āItās nothing I havenāt seen before.ā Then I start my way up the stairs, knocking softly on the wooden door. āKaz?ā My voice is barely above a whisper, gentle and soothing. I hear no movement. āKaz? Cāmon, itās me.. Open the door.ā I repeat a little louder, keeping my soft tone. I hear some rustling behind the door, then multiple locks being undone. I take a deep sigh as I wait for the door to open.
The door opens just a crack, his eye peering through the crack. āWhat do you want?ā His voice is stern, but not rude. I give him a soft, reassuring smile; āBad day, hm?ā He nods in response, staying silent. āYou going to let me in?ā I ask softly, fiddling with my hands.
He says nothing, just opens the door slowly, backing away and letting me inside. He takes a few steps away from me, distancing himself considerable. It must have been really bad today. I give him a sympathetic smile, making sure to keep my distance. I take a seat in the chair across the room. āDo you wanna talk about it?ā He shrugs, taking a seat on the bed across from me glancing down almost shamefully at his ungloved hands. I take mental note of this, bringing my gaze to his as he starts to speak.
āI thought it was working..ā He mumbles quietly, and my heart aches for him. āKaz.. This isnāt an easy thing to overcome, you are doing better, but there are going to be good and bad days.. What matters is that you persevere, you have people here that support you. Good and bad.ā
He nods slowly, āI know.. But it is hard, so hard. Itās as though Iām putting in all this effort, for even a little bit of hope just to have it all swept away by some.. accidental run in at the wrong time.ā He shakes his head, almost angrily. āOne brush of an arm from a stranger on the street and Iām back.. there.ā He refers to his past, the anger suddenly building in his body as he throws his cane forcefully into the shelves on the side wall. I gasp, flinching a bit. He rarely lashes out in anger like this, but it never gets easier when he does. He stands abruptly, and begins pacing, causing me to stand as well. āK-Kaz..ā I stammer, my heart beating rapidly in my chest. Suddenly I hear a knock at the door, causing Kaz to snap his gaze towards it. I hold my hand up to Kaz as I make my way to the door, opening it slightly, hiding the mess Kaz had made.
Jesper is standing there, a very worried look on his face; āIs everything okay?ā
I nod, before mouthing the words. āJust a bad day, remember?ā He gives a sympathetic look before descending down the stairs again. I shut and lock the door behind me as I return my attention to Kaz. He looks down at the mess and then back up at me, his eyes sad as if his heart just shattered into a million pieces. āIām sorry..ā He whispers, sitting on the edge of the bed and placing his head in his hands. I shake my head, āItās okay, Kaz..ā He shakes his head, āIt isnāt.ā I glance down at the shattered glass on the floor before kneeling beside it and beginning to pick up the pieces. āNo.. Stop, you donāt have to clean that-ā Before he even gets to finish the sentence I hiss In pain, a sharp piece of glass cutting my finger. He stands suddenly, lunging worriedly to my aid, but before his hands can grab yours, he freezes. His eyes dart to mine in panic and a tear rolls down his cheek, āI-I canāt, Iām sorry..ā His voice is a broken whisper, and I can feel the pain radiating from him. I nod understandingly, giving him a reassuring smile as I stand and grab a towel. I wrap my finger as I glance over at him, heās still on the floor beside where I was, completely defeated.
āWhy are you fighting so hard for this, Kaz?ā I ask him, not rudely, just to get him to remember why we started working on it in the first place. He lets out a shaky breath, standing to his feet.
āI want to be better..ā He whispers, still looking at the floor. āYou are the sweetest, most kind woman I know.. Youāre hurt and I canāt even hold your hand. You deserve to be held, (Y/N)..ā He sounds so sad as the words leave his mouth.
I step towards him, this time he doesnāt back away, only a brief moment of panic. āYou want to hold me?ā I whisper softly, realizing wasnāt fighting for him, he was fighting for me. He finally brings his gaze to mine, my sweet, caring features immediately calming him again. āYes..ā Is all he can manage as he steps closer to me. āOne step at a time, Kaz.. Donāt push yourself, okay?ā He nods in response, a soft smile on his face as he brings a hand up to my cheek, I stay completely still and let him move as he wishes, the backs of his knuckles brushing lightly across the soft skin. Baby steps.
āJust.. be patient with me, okay?ā He whispers.
āAlways...ā I return, a look of adoration on my face as his hand gently lays against my cheek.
āYouāre why Iām still fighting, (Y/N)..ā
