Not a Total Psycho

I need more Petopher infidelity fics, cheating with each other and awful angst.

Like I need Chris married because that’s what a good Argent does, and everyone knows he can’t grow a spine and man up to his daddy. So he leaves Peter, who he knows is his mate (and is the enforcer of the Hale pack) and hunts, and fathers a baby.

I need Peter going off and getting bitter and sarcastic (so non-canon, right?) and calling Chris drunk off and on through the years, telling him all the way he wants to make Chris come undone and Chris not hanging up as he listens to Peter’s breathing getting rough on the other end of the phone and the slick noise of his fist on himself while Chris just sits on the couch with his family and acts like nothing is happening.

Or Chris getting out of bed beside Victoria in the middle of the night with these calls and going down the hall to his office to tell Peter all the ways he wants to take him apart piece by piece in a quiet mumble until Peter gets off saying his name.

I need them meeting up in person in their 30s and 40s more and more often. Peter telling Chris a one word name of a hotel and the number. I need Chris driving three hours one way, because he convinces himself that’s reasonable.

But mostly, I need Chris to lay his head on Peter’s belly after they’ve gotten off in some hotel and telling him about all the schools Allison has been accepted to and Peter knowing what she wants to major in and the names of her friends when Chris mentions them. I want him to know her first words because Chris called him and told him the night after she said them. I want Peter to have to purr sweet soothing things to Chris when Allison gets her period and he’s scared she’s growing up, and when she gets her license, her first boyfriend. I want him to love her, even when he doesn’t know her, even when he hates that it’s possible for her to exist, because he loves Chris and he adores the way his eyes light up when he talks about his daughter.

"No one's going to find out. "

"We can't do this - the boss will see! "

"I believe in keeping relationships between co-workers professional but you make it so god damn hard. "

"Do you know what it means if we get caught?"

"You were cheating on me?"

"They can't find out I've been having an affair with you."

"I'm not your dirty little secret."

"Nobody sees, nobody knows. We are a secret, can't be exposed."

"I want to tell the world you're mine."

"They'll kill us if they find out."

"You know, I'm sure there's a janitors closet around here somewhere."

"My parent's don't know."

"They don't know about us."

"I don't care what people say when we're together."

"I know I'm not your only, but at least I'm one."

"It's so hard to concentrate when you're over there looking so sexy."

"I can't keep doing this. I need someone who isn't afraid to hold my hand in public."

"All I really want is to know if the love is worth the sacrifice."

"I've been cheating on you."

"One day everyone will know. But today isn't that day."

"I know your secret."

"Have fun in jail once the court finds out about her/his age."

"I'm your teacher/student. This will never work out."

"I see you there and I just want to go up and kiss you but I know I can't and that makes me sad."

"I have an earnest desire to get things absolutely right."

"The time we have together is quality, rather than quantity."

"Get yourself out of your comfort zone. It's a great learning experience."

"Some can handle it, and some can't. I'm not interested in the ones who can't."

"I'll often say certain things just to motivate people or to get something else out of them."

"You're making me mad. Fucking mad."

"Forecast for tomorrow? 100 percent chance of tears."

"Do you want a fucking medal?"

"I wouldn't resort to cannibalism, never mind if I was starving."

"From an early age I understood that cooking was never going to be a job, it's a passion."

"You know, I have a rough side. I have a smooth side."

"I could never maintain a relationship with a vegetarian. Their breath is just too smelly."

"My gran could do better! And she's DEAD!"

"I have to laugh when someone calls me a ______. I've been called far worse than that."

"I wish you'd jump in the oven. That'd make my life a lot easier."

"No one's going to find out. "

"We can't do this - the boss will see! "

"I believe in keeping relationships between co-workers professional but you make it so god damn hard. "

"Do you know what it means if we get caught?"

"You were cheating on me?"

"They can't find out I've been having an affair with you."

"I'm not your dirty little secret."

"Nobody sees, nobody knows. We are a secret, can't be exposed."

"I want to tell the world you're mine."

"They'll kill us if they find out."

"You know, I'm sure there's a janitors closet around here somewhere."

"My parent's don't know."

"They don't know about us."

"I don't care what people say when we're together."

"I know I'm not your only, but at least I'm one."

"It's so hard to concentrate when you're over there looking so sexy."

"I can't keep doing this. I need someone who isn't afraid to hold my hand in public."

"All I really want is to know if the love is worth the sacrifice."

"I've been cheating on you."

"One day everyone will know. But today isn't that day."

"I know your secret."

"Have fun in jail once the court finds out about her/his age."

"I'm your teacher/student. This will never work out."

"I see you there and I just want to go up and kiss you but I know I can't and that makes me sad."