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how does it feel like to fall at a speed unperceived by a mortal’s eye? it feels like every piece of you will crumble in ashes, crash against a cold surface until you are nothing but a splatter of red in a meaningless setting. how does it feel like to break your legs in the fall but not die? tim’s mind was circling around the possibility that this was just a test, that he was in a nightmare again. it was quiet, but his mind raced with thoughts and screams, the same ones he heard when he witnessed the fall of a great bird. he felt weak beyond comprehension, but he had to act strong. for his alternative was lying in a hospital bed himself, starving himself to death because of worry – or breaking his legs too, because a part of him was crushed against the ice that day.
the room felt warmer, and he hated the heat. he felt as though he was sweating, but knew he was not. even if the room were to be on fire, he would have stayed and burnt with him. because the other choice was leaving him again, letting him break his pretty leg, letting him take the big fall and for what? the idea of competition has never appeared to be stupider, it was not like him to think of it as such. but looking at saint he could see it, see how stupid it was to lose yourself for…nothing. because that was what it was, nothing. it felt empty. and he felt cold about it, as cold as he could – it kept him away from losing his mind. he could not look at saint right away, he avoided his gaze, but listened to his voice. like a call back home, an echo, a beautiful silver lining or the light at the end of the tunnel. he missed him, but he would not say it – he could not say why it hurt so much to be away and be present.
and when he looked up to meet his eyes for the first time in a while, the cold found a course in his body. it dragged his blood through his veins, just like it did the first time they met when they were just kids. as if it found a life source, a home away from home – peace, a sanctuary. and the sound of child saint’s broken french was painted all over the walls of his mind. his kind gesture, the only gesture he needed to get up from the ice and brush the blood off his knees. it was saint who helped him get up, who cleaned his wounds. and now he must clean his. he dragged the chair even closer, now aware it made a lot of noise but allowing it to do so. like an ice breaker, they needed it. he leaned closer, his breath caught in his throat – he has never been nervous around saint, but the pile of emotion was overwhelming him.
he ran a hand through his hair by force of habit, he forgot he has dyed it. it was probably a big change, but one that was needed in his opinion. he looked at saint, his words made him roll his eyes. it was not out of malice but out of playfulness, their dynamic was naturally playful and he would not have done anything to change it. even given their current situation. “your cast and face are annoying too,” he commented on the obvious elephant in the room, then moved even closer to saint. his hair fell on his face just slightly, it definitely looked pretty against his pale skin. his tone turned a little more serious, his worry slipping out naturally. “how are you feeling? does it hurt you? did you sleep?”
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it did not sit well with tim to see someone get worried over him. it was not often that people cared like that for him, so when they did, it hit him how much he could not handle it. it was the pain they felt tim felt guilty for, he did not want to be a stone on a smooth road. he looked at han and wanted to gesture that he was actually alright even if the pain was starting to numb him more. but before he could, he spotted the doctor making his way towards them. he did not know him, which was strange, because tim thought he met all doctors at the rink. he hissed a bit when his injured spot was touched, but he still did not feel like there was any reason for concern.
he heard han’s breathing next to him, it calmed him down just a bit. but he still frowned at the doctor, especially because he did not know him. “you must be iver. I’ve heard you like to be adventurous,” the doctor chuckled, tim could care less about the chat. he supposed he had a reputation even amongst doctors, he was one to visit their cabinet quite frequently. “everything looks fine. but you should rest for a while. you make sure he does not move too much,” the doctor addressed han, but tim was dead-set on reacting. he did not like being bossed around.
“I am alright, I do not need a babysitter,” he attempted to get up, but the doctor reached out quick enough to help him. tim did not want to admit that he needed the help, that was not how things worked. however, since he was feeling a bit weak, he grabbed han’s arm to support his weight. it was a bit embarrassing to cling onto someone he wanted to kick just a second ago. “fine. but you are not spoon-feeding me, or I will really punch you,” he looked at han, he did not really mean it, but one can expect anything from timothée iver.
tim looked at felix, his innocence was robbing fondness out of him. he could not really be mad or sad, not even annoyed at this point. he sighed a bit, processing all questions before finally answering. “I like chocolate, but I also like mint-chocolate. mine changes too, but rocky road is a bit too sweet for me,” he nodded with a smile, then hummed a bit. “figure skating can be really magical, I agree. it is my life, a part of me that I cannot remove, nor do I want to. I cannot imagine myself without it, so perhaps in many ways it is like flying. it feels natural, gracious, like breathing. I do not have to think about it, I just do it,” he explained, sinking in the couch. speaking about his passion made him quite happy. “yes, you look like a clumsy skater. no offense,” he chuckled, teasing a little.
he looked at felix, the idea of forgetting everything was quite terrifying. “you would be surprised how much your body can remember,” he restrained himself from touching the other again, but he shifted closer. “I bet your body remembers things you do not, so in a way, memory still shaped you. even if you cannot recall how or why. at least that is my opinion. I think we remember things from past lives too. and the body reacts accordingly. some people have unexplained fears, perhaps they too are lost memories. but forgetting must be really frustrating, it probably was hard for you,” he empathised, it was a rare display of such an emotion. but tim possessed it regardless, he was quite sensitive in his own right.
tim laughed fondly at felix’s innocent confidence, he found it endearing. “I am sure of it. if an earthquake comes, the snuggle will certainly protect us from being crushed to death,” he shook his head amused, caressing felix’s back softly. “twinkly twinkle little star? aw, am I a star now? that is rather cute, I must say. and I believe I can be very unhappy cuddling. this is my unhappy face,” he put a sad face on, exaggerating it on purpose to make it rather funny. he even scrunched his nose to frown harder, mimicking some cartoon’s voice. “so unhappy!”
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Anya is LIVE right now
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
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