Mothwing Dust

I’m barely keeping up with life, hence the recent absence from Tumblr. We finally bought our very first house and moved in on Easter. Being pregnant and sick with a cold virus really screwed things up for me. Despite minor problems, we love the house, but it’s going to take me *forever* to thoroughly clean and organize this place while caring for four children (4-years-old and younger). Baby number five is due July 30th, and will probably arrive one or two weeks early (like my other singletons). I’ve been so focused on looking for/buying/moving into a house the past few months that I haven’t really spent much time looking at baby names!  Then there’s the matter of Phaedra’s postponed birthday party. She turned three on March 28th, but we haven’t celebrated yet because of the house ordeal. Even Ostara & Easter got overlooked... And my husband got a new (and better) job, so there have been a lot of changes lately... (o_o)

My ultrasound appointment got moved ahead to the 21st because the technician called in sick. I was pretty disappointed, but really, one more week is nothing ~ it’s still the earliest scan I’ll have had out of all of my pregnancies. On Tuesday, Ceinwyn had her "1st" check-up (since she was little, like 2 yrs old?). She got two shots, one in each leg and only cried a little. The surprise gift I promised her helped calm her down (a Yokai Watch blind bag that came with a necklace, stickers & tattoos). The shots really wiped her out though, she's been sick for two days - puked yesterday & once this morning. :( At least the babies handled their shots well. Aoife weighs 13 lbs and Locke weighs 5 or 6 oz more than her. And my Dad is pretty proud of himself for finding an aviation acronym that helps him remember how to spell Aoife's name ~ IFE: In-Flight Emergency. I’m trying to crank out the rest of my Yule decorations so that the tree is decorated *before* the actual holiday. (-_-;) Like always, I have a ton of great ideas for making things, but never enough time. But I keep reminding myself that this is going to be a holiday tradition and it’s okay to add things with each year (and the girls will be older and able to help more, too). P.S. I’ve forgotten how much more difficult it is to decorate a live tree instead of an artificial one. It’s so easy to bend fake branches to help get ornaments positioned perfectly. Another reminder that there’s no such thing as perfection and I need to stop wasting energy by trying to control things...

Yesterday, I had my first prenatal appointment. I weighed in at 228 lbs (yikes!). I’m 6 weeks pregnant and have an ultrasound scheduled for next Wednesday on the 14th. It feels weird to have a scan so early ~ I don’t know if this is normal, or if they want to get a jump on seeing whether or not I’m having twins again. My family has already been taking bets on what it’s going to be, but everything I’m feeling right now points to only one baby. The best news is that as long as everything goes well, I’ll be able to try for a VBAC. Most of what I read on the internet said I wouldn’t be able to (over-weight, advanced maternal age, got pregnant too soon from last c-section - not to mention that some hospitals won’t let you try because of insurance reasons), but thankfully my doctor is awesome.

The twins were born 9 weeks ago and I finally packed my breast pump away today. I gave up pumping without much of a fight ~ maybe I would have tried harder if I wasn’t taking care of four children ages 4 and under. So, formula it is. I try not to think about it too much so that I don’t get depressed, and I focus on the fact that at least I was able to breastfeed Ceinwyn for a whole year, and Phaedra for a year and a half. Things have just been different this time around... I think that both of the twins spit-up too much, so there might be an issue with reflux. They’ve been gaining weight, but not the amount they should be. Locke throws-up more than Aoife does, no matter how long I try to burp them and keep them upright. Our pediatrician suggested adding rice or oat cereal to their bottles, so hopefully that helps (I’ve had to feed them an average of 60 mL every 2 hours for about a week now). If not, I assume that medication is the next step. Otherwise, they’re doing well! They’ve almost out-grown their newborn clothes, so now I need to dig out the 0-3 month clothing. I forgot to get their exact weights at the last well-visit, but I know they’ve hit the 9 lb mark. We might need to get Locke some clothes since all I have is mostly girl stuff, with very little gender neutral clothing. Both of them have been tracking things with their eyes and they’ve been smiling ever since I brought them home from the hospital - it seems like they’re developmentally ahead compared to what Phaedra was at this age. This is the easy part. Pretty soon I’m going to blink and have two babies crawling around, looking for things to put into their mouths...

Another pregnancy update: - weight: 231 lbs (11 lbs gained total) - I’m currently 31 weeks? 32 weeks? Measuring at 42 weeks... - Baby A weighs 4 lbs 1 oz, Baby B weighs 4 lbs 9 oz - Baby A is breech, Baby B is head-down - If both babies aren’t head-down by September 19th, it’s c-section time.

I had another check-up today and there wasn’t very much to discuss, which is great! The results from the last ultrasound were good. I asked for clarification on the twins’ difference in weight - even though baby A is behind her brother, she’s still ahead of the average in percentiles. Doc and I both think it’s weird that baby B is the bigger one (anecdotes I’ve read online usually have baby B being smaller) but boys tend to be bigger than girls, so (shrug). Also, there’s a noticeable difference in the twins’ heartbeats - B’s is faster than A’s. I’m currently 29 weeks along and measuring at 38 weeks, so it’s like I’m at the point where Ceinwyn and Phaedra were born. I weighed-in at 227 lbs (gained 2 lbs since my last visit on June 27th). My total weight gain has been 7 lbs, and that’s mostly the weight of the babies, so I guess that means I’ve technically been *losing* weight. Doc made a point to check my ankles - the ends of my fibulae are still easily seen and felt! She said that I’m doing better with this pregnancy than she did with hers, and she only had one baby...  Aside from normal pregnancy complaints, the thing I hate the most right now is how painfully numb the front of my abdomen is from being stretched. All I want to do is rub my tummy, but even the spray from the shower-head when I take a shower is unpleasant. Luckily, most of the fetal movement I feel occurs around the perimeter where it doesn’t hurt. My next ultrasound is August 3rd, and from then on I will be having one *weekly*.  (o_o)

Lately, I’ve been so frustrated with myself because I’m uncertain if I’ve been having Braxton Hicks contractions, despite paying attention to my body. I think I might have had them last night ~ what I thought was just fetal movement occurred at regular intervals for a while (despite having drank water and lying down). Whatever I was feeling was only at the bottom half of my abdomen, though - I didn’t feel a tightening over my entire bump. Eventually, it all stopped before I went to bed for the night, but not before I got worried about being put on hospital bed-rest. At my appointment this morning, my doctor put my fears to rest. She had consulted with two other doctors over the phone and was reassured that nothing proves that I’ll go into preterm labor soon, and any intervention used for singleton pregnancies won’t prevent it if I do. I have a great history with my previous two pregnancies, which significantly lowers my risks. My blood pressure is good, as well as my urine, and weight gain so far. I passed my glucose test. My doctor manually checked my cervix today and said that I’m not dilated. Over all, I’ve been feeling pretty good (despite normal, minor complaints), so I’m going to keep doing what I’ve been doing. Next week, I have another ultrasound, this time to measure fetal growth (which I’m really curious about). At 32 weeks, I’ll be having weekly ultrasounds, but those won’t always be for growth checks - the technician will be looking at the amniotic fluid, making sure the babies are breathing well, etc. I’ve got a month and a half until that schedule starts...

Just had a transvaginal ultrasound to measure my cervix, which is now at 9 mm. Last time, I was at 1.5, I believe. I had a funny feeling last week that the twins were no longer head-down, and sure enough, they’re both head-up now.  I’ve got an appointment in the morning (doc’s going on vacation after that) and I was told to rest as much as possible until then...

I finally got my glucose screening for this pregnancy out of the way today - not sure when I'll get the results. This is the third time I’ve taken the test, and every time I’ve been given the drink (yummy fruit punch flavor), I chug it under a minute. And every time I hand the empty bottle back to the same receptionist (after all these years), she is always surprised. It never fails to give me a chuckle...  I'm 26 weeks along (measuring at 34 weeks for a singleton pregnancy!) I've only gained 5 lbs so far, which is shocking. This puts me at 225 lbs. I got confirmation that my cervix is not funneling and I'm not dilated, according to the last ultrasound results, anyway. I also confirmed that both babies weighed exactly the same - so, for now at least, they seem to be getting what they need from me. Two days until my next ultrasound!