The Random Escapades of a Badger

have some shitty chaotic pride flags ^^

me trying to convince myself that the whole spectrum of human emotions is a good and necessary thing to feel even if its not comfortable while im actively experiencing emotions that make me feel like my bones are being dissolved in acid

oh this 100% just me being a hopeful shipper but it feels as if augustus DOES love lucy romantically but just can't tell because he's never actually experienced real love with no expectations before. when you're experiencing safe love finally after a lifetime of trauma, you can mistake the safeness/lack of excitement for not actually loving them because both anxiety and love are associated with increase in heart rate. but you know, even then, there's still an element of it not being healthy if that were to be the case, because augustus is living under her roof, which creates the power imbalance of "if something were to happen, i could easily be on the streets and in danger again". but it also has the exciting element of him overthinking the consequences if he ever did realize ... heh heh heh. and then him taking out his frustration on mike, partially not really realizing just WHY the sight of mike makes him feel so angry and why some days he just doesn't feel satisfied after. also ALSO on that note, i must wonder if lucy would ever fall in love with augustus for the same reasons. her first rodeo with actually being treated NOT like a replacement or a piece of meat. because even mike's kindest moments must have an element of "he was only doing this because sandy wasn't here!" for him. but with augustus there's nothing like that at all. also wait where is augustus in the lucy pregnancy mike baby daddy timeline? i forget the name of the bci also sorry if my internal plotlines dont make sense or i have typos my excuse for all of these things is that im crossfaded asf typing this thinking about cute double decade old cats. i love u btw thank you for writing this shit it makea me very happy in my heart zone Dancing with u el digitale style