~Safe space for everyone~

————————————————————————————————

Millennial. Godzilla: Legendary. Godzilla, gather the others. We need to have another Monarch-is-doing-something-stupid-again-and-we-have-to-stop-them-before-they-hurt-someone convention.

————————————————————————————————

Legendary. Godzilla: Hey guys I just found a new song I really like-

Earth. Godzilla: Is it about death?

Legendary. Godzilla: No.

Singular. Godzilla: Is it about drugs?

Monarch: Is it about sex?

Legendary. Godzilla: NO- it's about happiness and peace and-

Earth. Godzilla, Singular. Godzilla, and Monarch:

————————————————————————————————

Earth. Godzilla: Do you take constructive criticism?

Monarch: Not without crying

————————————————————————————————

Earth. Godzilla: What's the most illegal thing you can do with one dollar?

Monarch: Exchange it for a hundred pennies, put them all in a sock, and then beat someone to death with it.

————————————————————————————————

Singular. Godzilla: *Locks Monarch in the car.* Act like a child, get treated like a child.

Monarch: What? Isn't it illegal to leave a child locked in a car?

————————————————————————————————

Legendary. Godzilla: Monarch taught me to think before I act.

Legendary. Godzilla: ...So if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured that I thought about it and am confident in my decision.

————————————————————————————————

Minus. Godzilla: Hey, you wanna know a secret?

Monarch: No.

Minus. Godzilla: Okay.

Monarch:

Monarch: Do you smell smoke?

Minus. Godzilla: The secret is that the house is on fire.

————————————————————————————————

Heisei. Godzilla: Can I have a private talk with you?

Minus. Godzilla: Okay, as long as it’s not about tampons because I just don’t understand them.

————————————————————————————————

Minus. Godzilla: *finds a note* Hmm, what's this?

Shin. Godzilla: Hey, that's mine! *tries to grab it*

Minus. Godzilla: Aww, it's a love note for Millennial. Godzilla?

Shin. Godzilla: No-

Minus. Godzilla: *opens it*

Minus. Godzilla:

Shin. Godzilla:

Minus. Godzilla: I can't read this.

————————————————————————————————

Monarch: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

————————————————————————————————

Rodan: Why is Monarch making me do the dishes again? You haven’t washed them in a week, Godzilla!

Godzilla: It’s because I’m Monarch’s favorite.

Rodan: I hate you.

————————————————————————————————

Monarch: I told Rodan to grab snacks for everyone.

Mothra, looking through the options: Why did you grab fruit snacks? Are you five? Who even likes Fruit Snacks?

*Monarch, Rodan, and Godzilla raise their hands*

————————————————————————————————

Mecha: If I say yes am I joining a cult?

Rodan: Possibly.

Mecha: I’m in.

————————————————————————————————

Ichi: ARE YOU-

Monarch: Fucking.

Ichi: KIDDING ME?! YOU-

Monarch: Fucking.

Ichi: IDIOT!

Kong: …What was that?

Monarch: Scar king banned Ichi from swearing, so I’m helping them out

————————————————————————————————

Monarch, ordering coffee: I’d like a light roast.

Scar King: You're kinda ugly.

————————————————————————————————

Mecha: I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

Kong: I sleep with a axe.

Monarch: Both of you are pathetic.

Mecha: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Monarch: Godzilla.

————————————————————————————————

*Ichi is casually searching around the room*

Ni: Hey Ichi, what’re you looking for?

Ichi: My will to live.

*Monarch walks into the room*

Ichi: Oh, there it is.

————————————————————————————————

Mecha: I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness—

Monarch: Hi.

Mecha: *melts down in a flustered heap of softness*

————————————————————————————————

Ni: I am working on this whole Good Guy thing, but anyone who cuts me in line at Starbucks deserves to have their kneecaps shot out, okay?

————————————————————————————————

Kong: Let’s hear it.

Mecha: Kong, I have a great idea.

Mecha: We trick Shimo and Ichi to go out on a date together.

Kong: YES!

Kong: And hey, if that doesn’t work out, maybe you and I could go out, get some drinks—

Mecha, hitting him with a book: THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU

————————————————————————————————

Monarch, at Godzilla: You're my significant other.

Godzilla: Yeah I am!

Monarch, signing at Jia: You're my child.

Jia, signing back: Yes mama.

Monarch, at Ni: You're my bitch.

Ni: Yeah I am- wait, what?

Monarch, at Kong: My bestie.

Kong: Naturally.

Monarch, Kevin: HA, GAY!

Kevin: Fuck you.

————————————————————————————————

Monarch, at Godzilla's funeral: I need a moment with them.

Everyone: Of course. *They leave*

Monarch, leaning over Godzilla′s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead.

Godzilla: Yeah, no shit.

————————————————————————————————

(This was before Shimo's gender was confirmed to be female.)

Shimo: Wow, they really hate us.

Scar king: Yes, perhaps they’re homophobic.

Shimo: But we’re not gay, Scar king.

Scar king:

Shimo:

Scar king: We’re not?

————————————————————————————————

Scar king: Do you always have to attack me with your words?

Godzilla: Would you prefer me to use a brick?

————————————————————————————————

Kevin: Ichi, what does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?

Ichi: I don’t know, I love you, talk to you later.

Kevin: Alright, I love you too, I'll ask Godzilla.

Ichi: Wait- Kevin, no-

————————————————————————————————

Godzilla: Have I ever told you that I love you with my whole heart?

Monarch: For the love of all that is holy, I am not taking you to McDonalds. It’s 2am!

Godzilla: Mean.

————————————————————————————————

Kong, talking to Monarch: With all due respect, which is none…

————————————————————————————————

Ichi, pointing to the wall: What color is this?

Monarch: Gray.

Mothra: Grey.

Ichi, turning to Scar king: Now tell them what color you think it is.

Scar King: Dark white.

————————————————————————————————

Godzilla: If I die, you can have what little I own.

Monarch: Wait. What do you mean "if" you die?

Godzilla: My unending existence is fuelled by pure spite, that of which the painful experiences of life have rendered me full.

Monarch:

Monarch: *Sighs* Let me call your therapist again.

————————————————————————————————

Godzilla: Do you want some tea?

Monarch: What are the options?

Godzilla: Yes or no.