To the child who hurts and struggles.
Oh dear child.
If you only knew the countless nights your momma cried herself to sleep. She cried herself to sleep because she feels your hurt. She knows beneath the anger, lies the hurt in your heart. The hurt that you don't fit in. The hurt that makes you feel as though everyone else is more important than you. The hurt that you struggle with school, social situations, maybe a bit of bullying.
Momma knows child.
Momma knows how hard it is. Momma sees the struggle and the fight within you. She sees the sadness in the way you get angry, the way you rebel. Her heart breaks for you and with you. She sees the indecisions, the choices you make, the reasons you make them. She longs to hold you in her arms and tell you everything will be alright. But it seems as though momma missed that chance. You see, momma knows you've drifted away. Momma knows you've grown apart from the family who loves you so much. But what you don't know my child, is this.
Momma would die for you. Momma would give her soul to Satan.
If it meant you could see what she sees.
She sees the beautiful baby you were and the way she felt complete when she first held you. She sees the moment you recognize her voice. She sees the first smile, the first laugh the first word, the first crawl, the first step. She hears the cries for her in the middle of the night. She hears the soft sigh as you drift off to sleep in her arms, with the sweet smell of milk on your breath. She sees the independence and confidence you exude, as you excitedly learn to eat, dress, brush your teeth, and learn to dress. She sees the fear in your eyes as you enter the classroom for the first time. She sees the smile on your face and the excitement as you rush to tell her about the friends you made. She sees her heart leaving her body as you no longer want to hold her hand. She sees you not needing her more and more. She sees that she has to let you fly.
She sees you become your own person.
"She loves him.
She loves his sense of humor.
She loves his kind heart and his pure soul.
She loves how charming he is.
She loves his caring nature.
She loves his sweet persona.
She loves his gentle way with animals.
She loves his beautiful smile.
She knows he's not perfect.
She knows he will mess up."
But, and listen closely.
You will always be her heart.
She will always be there to support you.
To talk to you.
To listen to you.
To give you the best advice possible, or to just say nothing.
She will guide you the best she can.
She will always be your rock.
She will always be your safe place.
Her arm will always welcome you with a hug.
Her home will always be your home.
She will always be there.
And when you're ready, she'll be waiting.
