Per Aspera

As I lay slumped against my bed

In that dark, choked bedroom

My eyes were glued to where you were

My mind was fraying by the neuron

Did you feel joy thinking about me

As much as I felt lost thinking about you?

And confused and scared and angry

And sad and betrayed and cold and

I was draining, exsanguinating

Every beat of my heart bled me drier

My clothes were soaked, and there

I passed in a pool of my own blood

Now there is something missing

I am glad it is gone, truly, but

why didn't I have the choice?

Give it back, you son of a bitch.

I want to feel whole, if but briefly

Now there is something wrong with me

I didn't ask to become like this

Why can't I be a blank slate?

I no longer feel much towards you

But now I feel so much towards me

When I do what must be done

In the dark heart

of a tangled forest

A boy found a box

He opened the box

and out sprung demons

twisted and scarred

He could conquer them

and become stronger

and truer to himself

But he had things to do

So he closed the box

And walked away, but

I am a lone fire, burning away

I throw my light into the dark

As I burn, I ponder upon

Each entangled lick of flame

It is easy to start a fire

All you need is air, some heat and

something that will burn away

It will be glad to light itself

A fire is an entrancing thing

It dances and sings and crackles

It moves and spins and breathes

It is always changing, but not too much

Sadly, it cannot last long, for even

if it has ample air, and is not snuffed out

Its body will burn away, bit by bit

Until there is but a pile of cold ash

A fire is very simple, however

All of its theatrics, its great coups

Its growth and eventual vanishing

Nothing but simple combustion

It may rage, and roar, and flash, and tower

It may leap and whirl and be prideful

But it is predictable and limited

It and its kin share the fate of dust on the wind

Within those brutal limits, there is beauty

A fire can be slow and musing

A fire can be loud and flashy

No two fires burn wholly alike

Two fires can join and burn together

Fires may give each other warmth

Some wish to be part of a bonfire

Others wish to burn alone

Fires will not burn forever, though

We burn now in the welcoming morning

But the sun evolves, and so comes night

It will put us out, once and for all

A fire requires air, heat, and fuel

The night will rob us of the heat

The night will shred apart the fuel

And thin the air to nothing at all

Fire is beautiful, and temporary

Fire is unique and limited

Fire is not to last forever

Fire is a divine gift from above

For we have been gifted Fire

It is shaped in the image of Light

It was first set alight by the Spark

While it lasts, it shall conquer the dark

We are but flames, pushing at the darkness

Each one of us spreads warmth

By burning, we glorify the mission

That we have been mantled with

Fire is contained for now, but

Fire does not stop growing, for

it must grow, and will one day set