Trisha

Make up heaven

To everyone who’s ever felt unhappy or ashamed of their body: some people are unable to walk or write, maybe they have a missing limb making easy everyday tasks more challenging. When you remind yourself of things like this, suddenly disliking your body for it not looking the way you want seems silly. Many people in a wheelchair would rather have that body and walk then be skinny in a wheelchair. Just be grateful that you have a body and that it’s keeping you alive. Your body’s your friend not your enemy, love it! No matter what you look like I promise you are beautiful, be grateful for life and screw the rest.

Grown-ups like numbers. When you tell them about a new friend, they never ask questions about what really matters. They never ask: ‘What does his voice sound like?’ ‘What games does he like best?’ ‘Does he collect butterflies?’ They ask: ‘How old is he?’ ‘How many brothers does he have?’ ‘How much does he weigh?’ ‘How much money does he have?’ Only then do they think they know him. If you tell grown-ups, ‘I saw a beautiful red brick house, with geraniums at the windows and doves at the roof…,’ they won’t be able to imagine such a house. You have to tell them, ‘I saw a house worth a thousand francs.’ Then they exclaim, ‘What a pretty house!

He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn’t going to quote poetry, he’s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, and don’t expect for more than he can give. Don’t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, and miss him when he’s not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect guys don’t exist, but there’s always one guy that is perfect for you.

10 things i’ve learned this year: 1. you cannot control your thoughts and even if sharing your feelings might hurt someone, do it anyway. they deserve to know what you really think, and you shouldn’t feel guilty about the truth. 2. you are going to hurt people at some point in your life, no matter how much you try to do the right thing and make everyone happy. 3. don’t let the pain that you cause define you. maybe you made a mistake; this doesn’t mean you are a mistake. 4. don’t let the pain that you feel define you, either. there is always some kind of hope, something to laugh about, a reason to be happy. it’s okay to be sad, but don’t let yourself become blinded by the sadness, or you’ll never see the beauty in life (or yourself). 5. don’t let the pain you feel be the source of the pain you cause. i am not saying to cover up with a smile and pretend nothing is wrong. let people know that you’re sad, but know that it’s not contagious. 6. humans are always looking for a reason to be sad. it’s like we have an unconscious desire to feel bad, because we just want to feel something. you don’t have to look for the same pain as everyone else. in fact, i think if you start looking for something to be happy about, your eyes will be open to a whole new world. 7. you’re going to get stuck on people - some who don’t even notice how hard it is for you to let go, how your hands were somehow drenched in superglue before you grabbed onto theirs. but there’s a solution to unstick superglue, and you don’t have to wait for someone else to use it. you don’t have to wait for another person to come along, only to attach yourself to them, too. you don’t have to be attached to anyone. 8. fall in love with yourself. it isn’t weird and it isn’t egotistical. just notice the little things about yourself that someone who is in love with you would notice - the dimple in your left cheek when you smile without teeth, the way you see beauty in everything, how you’ll go out of your way to drive down your favorite road, the way you take in every aspect of a new setting with wonder. 9. your expectations for yourself ultimately determine how well you actually do. never underestimate yourself. if you recognize your capabilities, and you think you can do something, and you expect yourself to do that thing, then you will work for it and you will end up achieving it. 10. it is okay to take your time. on everything. if you don’t want to kiss him yet, tell him. if you don’t think that poem is done yet, keep writing, for another month if you have to. if you don’t think you’re ready for that test yet, keep studying, or even ask for help. in the end, the kiss will be worth the wait, the poem will be damn good, and your teacher will be proud of you (so will you).