When you think about that moment when you wanted to attempt something, take that risk, or leap of faith, what was the main reason you chose not to?

Fear is a big reason we avoid taking chances. >Fear of failure. >Fear of success (yes this is actually an issue for some people) >Fear of being exposed!

The thought of actually trying something and then coming up short can make you cringe. Add to this the thought of all that AND people standing in judgement of you - aaaaah, that is a deal breaker. Being exposed is scary. We don't want people to see us when we are weak. We want to show people our best - after all we want to be the best in anything we attempt, anything less - well, then we are exposed right!? We feel like failures on the inside and the thought of people actually seeing us fail, that is the ultimate fear. 

We all can attest to falling victim to this in one way or another in our lives. Maybe we wish we started sooner and didn't let those voices in and out of our heads prevent us from taking action.  Maybe you look at someone who does take action and think 'Why can't I have the balls to do what they do?' Taking action requires believing in your dream and and having an undying passion. When we have these, we will take the risk...believing we can is often the hardest part.

Action is key. I think where we get hung up is this thinking that if we do 'IT' we have to go all in and get it done right the first time. But what about taking baby steps? I tell my clients when I am training them; "Try it and if you fall out of it or can't do it we will keep trying until you can!" Every thing in life requires us to get a little vulnerable, allow ourselves to be exposed, and grow from there. The more we try, the more we learn and the more we can believe in all we are. Even if we fail - this reveals a ton in terms of strength, persistence, and resiliency!

ACTION is the only way to get from where you are today to where you want to be someday.

Today, take action. Small little steps toward your dream. Action will always trump staying stuck in fear. All you have to do is start...slow and steady wins the race. xo

Isn’t it amazing how we can actually allow others to hijack our thoughts? We do this all the time. I was recently talking to a friend about workouts and how my new obsession with the barbell has totally surprised me. I have several barbells but for the longest time I would use them sparingly. Lately, I have been using them in every single workout as I have changed a lot about my workout routine. Quickly my friend replied “I need to use barbells!”  

  Now I know we are suppose to look at this as a compliment. People look up to us and want to emulate what we do. That is all great but I hate the fact that my friend thought she “had” to start using barbells when she has an awesome routine right now and it works for her.

  But we do this don’t we?! We look at other people, hear what they are doing and feel that we too should be doing XYZ. But should we?

  Just because someone is doing something that is working for them doesn’t mean it will work for you. When we let someone’s opinions or actions hijack our own way of thinking and doing things we are entering into a slippery slop.  I come from the belief that if I am spending my time comparing myself to someone else I will never find my truth ~ my authentic self. When we allow others opinions or choices to sway ours there is a good chance we are not being true to ourselves and in that we will never be 100% happy. In order to stay true to you, it will be important to address your needs…how you do that will be critical it successfully meeting them. Hint ~ it won’t be by doing what everyone else is doing, it will be by doing it the way that works best for you.

  Today, be careful to not allow your opinions and thoughts to be hijacked by the fact that someone else is doing something a certain way. Trust your gut. Listen to the needs of your soul. Stay true to YOU!

It can be really hard to take the leap of faith and start something new. To push yourself out of your comfort zone and believe that you can. We are so good at defining our limitations and taking actions means we have chosen to ignore all that we are NOT and do it anyway. Scary? Hell yeah. There is trepidation when it comes to taking risks. But, if you have a clear purpose – you know the big WHY behind it all then your determination will be much stronger than any fear you may have.

  Fear does a great job keeping us stuck. It reminds us of all the things we have yet to become. We believe that until we accomplish that certain thing(s) we can’t go for it; our dreams will have to wait.  It puts the thought ‘I need to be more before I attempt this’ in our minds. This way of thinking is the exact reason so many people are feeling like they are in a dead end relationship, career, financial situation, or hopeless with their health and fitness. They keep spinning their wheels hoping that something – someway will give….

  This is no way to go about life. It is totally normal to be afraid while facing a change. There is a healthy amount of fear while taking that risk, but are you determined enough to not let that hold you back? Does fear own you or does your dreams? This is heavy stuff and I believe we are asking the wrong questions. We are so good at pinpointing and answering all the reasons why not. How about trying this? What is right with me?

Today, take some time to think about all that is right with you and why you are worth taking the risk. More important, you are worth taking the time to investigate what it is that you want out of life ~ WHAT IS YOUR PURPOSE?! A strong purpose keeps the fires of determination ignited. Do you know your BIG WHY? If not I strongly encourage you to take time to discover that – you are so worth it!

How do you know when you are owning your own stuff and staying out of other people's business? >You don't get angry with people because you go to self-compassion and benefit of the doubt. >When you have the thought "They are annoying" you leave it at that and move on - you don't attach all kinds of other emotions. >You stop trying to change people. You allow them to go through their journey the way they need to - in fact you may get to a point where you don't even have an opinion. You are too busy taking care of your stuff! >Forgiveness happens even before they ask.  >Judgements are not something you practice, as you know by pointing the finger at someone else, you are NOT owing your stuff, in fact you may be avoiding it.  Being accountable for you and your stuff is enough work, there is no need to worry about any one else's - that is for them to figure out. Of course if people seek your advice it is always best to be their for them. Projecting your thoughts or opinions is way different.  Is this easy? Not always, but the more you stay in your business and leave other people to theirs the more energy and zest for life you will have. There will be a calm - a peaceful feeling - if you will. You will have the ability to focus on YOU and how you can live your very best version of you possible! Today, every time you go to point a finger, remember there are 3 more pointing back at you. It is possible what is bothering you about someone else, is the one thing that drives you crazy about yourself. Gah ~ this is so hard to look at, but the more you do amazing things will come! xo ~ Maryalice

Those moments in time when you realize that life is something you should never take for granted but in actuality you take it for granted every single day. We all get caught up in the busyness of life; minutes turn into hours and hours turn into days - right before our eyes. We start a day with intentions to be more present, more available, more grateful and before we know it we are cursing at the car next to us and feeling that overwhelming stress of having to be somewhere or get stuff done. It happens and quite often it happens on the daily. But then there are those moments that make us take a second to reflect and realize that at any given moment it can all change and none of this craziness we throw ourselves into will matter. The only thing that will matter is that you loved and were loved. Really - that is it.  When we leave this planet physically we don't care if people remember us for getting all our errands done; for always being busy and getting stuff done. Can you imagine someone eulogizing you saying "She was very busy all the time, overwhelmed, and constantly focused on getting stuff gone." Gah - that would be terrible. There is so much more to all of us then the things we do. I believe God places people, places, and situations in front of us to be able to take personal inventory. For instance, to watch a parent age...This has been totally eye opening for me. Watching my father - a once 6'1 strong handsome, smart, funny, great dancer, spiritual, loving (and so much more) man become dependent, weak, and frail has been one of the most eye opening experiences of my life. A mixture of sadness, fear, pride, compassion, and so much more floods me every time I am blessed to be with him. As I watch him today versus when I was and he was younger, it is like a whole different person is there. It has really made me think about about how short life really is. How my busyness is only speeding up my journey with distraction and not allowing me to be present in the moment.  These experiences help us to say "no" to things that really don't matter or serve us. They give us a realization that there is more to life then running around like a looney! They make you realize the sacrifices that your parents have made for you in their life and how it is your turn to do the same for them.  So, yes we will read this and tomorrow we will still manage to somehow get busy - it is the human way. But I encourage you to take some time to find a few minutes to find the one thing (or more) you are grateful for. Today, try to take some time to remove yourself from the chaos of life and find time to bask in one thing you are extremely grateful for.

Discontent sucks. That feeling when you want something to be different but you are just not sure where and how to get there. So many people struggle with this, especially when it comes to weight.  They often feel as if they were only smaller they would be truly happy. If they could fit into their skinny jeans they would be empowered to live a happy - awesome life.  Don't get me wrong fitting perfectly into your clothes is an awesome feeling - but unfortunately if you not content in your life - this will not bring that peace that we all so want and deserve. Its easy to get sucked into advertisement. Skinny is glorified as such a perfect way to live. Kind of like the blonde's verses brunettes. But come on, let's be real, whether you are at your perfect weight or you have weight to lose - that is not going to be the driving factor in your happiness. I know MANY miserable skinny people. I know many skinny happy go lucky people too. But you get my point. Once we start weighing our happiness on a scale or in a jean size, we are missing the issue.  Happiness is a choice. It is designed by our actions. If you don't feel happiness in your life, you need to start within first. What is missing? What are your passions? What is your purpose? Just a quick tip - you will find any of these answers in a number... Happiness is found by doing that deep soul searching. Taking that time to nurture your spirit and reconnect all that makes you the beautiful awesome person you are. When we keep telling ourselves we need to be more of______(fill in your chosen expectation)and then and only then can we live truly happy, well that just enforces all we are not. But what is right about you RIGHT NOW!? What is something you can say out loud that even you are proud of? GO there. Take sometime to love who you are, and then maybe you'll start getting back to that happy place.  Today, realize you are so deserving of happiness - no matter what your size. But the bottom line is, if you truly want to be healthy, happy and fit you must start to love yourself from the InsideOut! Trying to do it any differently is a set-up for failure.

That moment when you realize you ate and drank wayyyy too much. All the feelings of "I shouldn't have eaten that." "Why did I do it." "I am so mad at myself." And on and on and on... But is it really worth it? What does this type of mindset do to us? It only sets us up to look at how weak we are. We place all our focus on the negative and food guilt quickly turns into not liking ourselves. We get angry and disappointed with ourselves wishing we had the ability to NOT eat 'bad' things. This turns into a spiral effect where we have this belief that we are somehow not a 'good' person anymore because we can't control ourselves. This is just belief - it is not fact. Our beliefs are powerful. They dictate our actions or inactions. I know when I used to beat myself up over food choices, it made me want to eat more bad food, it didn't motivate me to do or be better. So, I don't believe in food guilt, it is truly a waste of time.  Next time you have the thought; "I shouldn't have eaten that____" just allow yourself to have the thought. Once you start attaching all these negative adjectives to that thought "I'm bad" "How could I?" "What is wrong with me?" that is where you can do more harm then good.  We will all have a night where we are not spot on, it happens we're human. But instead of making that moment in time define who you are, give yourself the benefit of the doubt...If that was your best friend and she called you freaking out about what she ate - what would you say to her? Be your own best friend and have some self-compassion and move on!  Your positive attitude will give you better staying power then a defeatist mindset that just tells you how not good enough you are.  TODAY! When you have a negative thought, practice just allowing it to be a thought - just let it be. Try not attaching all the negativity to it. Focus on moving onward and how awesome your are from the InsideOut! xo

For me the one thing that excites me the most about a new year is the endless opportunities to get better - to be better. Don't get me wrong, I don't need a new year to live as my best version of me, but there is definitely something in the air that makes you sit back and ponder. It's hard to let this time of year go by and not think about who you are, where you are headed, and how in God's name are you going to do it all!

I spoke about this in my blog this week.(Read the full blog here:New Year - New You...Really?) I use a 6-step process that almost always guarantee's success. D.E.S.I.R.E.... Dream  Envision Seek Investigate Reveal Evolve

Through this process I am able to see that when I really - like REALLY want something I need to look at all angles of it. Dreaming is great, but it is actually a place we can get stuck. When we look at the obstacles, the hard work, and time it will take to achieve those dreams we put reality into the mix. Believe it or not this makes us take action faster as opposed to just dreaming about the potential of______(fill in your wish)

Here is the thing...When you take this 6-step process and you put it into motion you quickly learn that every time you have successfully achieved your goals you had to practice - fail - and practice again. There are no overnight miracles - there is grit, tears, frustration, and defeat. But any of you who have experienced failure know that resiliency is the answer.

When you can fail and allow yourself to get back into the game you will find your success. You will fulfill your dreams one way or another.

So as 2015 comes rolling in I am most excited about what this year will teach me in terms of failing and being resilient. I know there will be major challenges in front of me, but I also know with those challenges come priceless lessons that always make me a better version of me. I look forward to the wins and the losses, because in the end they both present different take-aways that are equally important to personal growth.

What gets you most excited about a New Year? Comment below! xo

The thought of having to allow things to unfold however they are meant to be....Oofa! This can be scary right?

I think for many of us we try our best to have some semblance of order in our lives. We have routines, habits, and rituals that help us feel that we are on course - our own personal course. But what happens when those daily routines are thrown off course due to life on life terms? This can be quite uncomfortable and in actuality a bit scary.

Knowing that we are making decisions and doing things to to keep order in our life is actually a very good feeling. We want to live a good life and do our best to make that happen. This is our way we maintain control - some sort of regiment in our lives.

But there are times when this just simply is not the case. Times like waiting to get into a college, or waiting to hear about a job offer. Times when you are waiting to hear if they accepted your offer on a house you want to purchase. Or worse, waiting to hear about test results and hoping your health is ok.

These are all moments in time when we can't own the outcome we can only control the way we handle the wait.

There will be times in our lives where we will have to wait and hope that we did everything in our power to make the outcome a positive one. But even that is not full proof. Take cancer for instance - you can be the healthiest person on this earth and still be susceptible to illness and disease. Sometimes life happens on life's terms and we don't have a say...

But no matter what, every single time, we have the power to choose how we handle it. This is something nothing or no one can take away from us.

Today, no matter what it is in your life you are waiting for or hoping for - you don't own how that unfolds. But, remember how you choose to wait and how you choose to handle the outcome is something you have full control over. xo

I believe the more you find gratitude in your heart the more you will be open to embracing your life - the good and the bad. Life is not all peaches & cream ~ that is for sure. But if we are only willing to show up for the good then we are selling ourselves short.

Embracing life during the good times is easy. But what about when life throws you a challenge or two, are you still able to embrace what's good in your life? I will admit this can be challenging but those who are able to maintain a grateful heart in the good and the bad times are the ones who spend a lot less time in the bad.

When we embrace every opportunity in our life with gratitude we are able to see the good in it all. This has been something I have been tested many times on in my life as I am sure you have as well. But a strong faith, an optimistic mindset, and the belief that there is hope will always pull you threw.

Today, try and practice embracing the day with a grateful heart. Troubles will come and troubles will go but they don't have to own your life or your energy. See the good you have all around you and stay in the strength of gratitude! xo

Something I learned a while back was in order for me to really know *ME* I had to take time each day to address 4-critical elements of my soul:

-Intellectual

-Physical

-Emotional

-Spiritual

When we take time to nurture these 4 aspects of our life we are able to tune in to the person we really are. We are able to give to ourselves all that we need and in turn we able to give MORE to the people and things we love. 

Do you ever ask yourself how you can fulfill your intellectual side? Maybe you do and that is awesome, because we are never to old to learn…in fact I would go as far as to argue that if you are not learning something new daily you are not fueling a side to you that can ignite some serious passion toward life. 

If we don't take time to emotionally fulfill our needs daily how can we actually be emotionally available to those we love? Think about this in terms of the oxygen mask on an airplane. I used to think it was crazy when they said "If you are traveling with a small child, give oxygen to yourself first and then administer oxygen to the child." I thought 'hell no' I would give to my child first - but then I got it. The potential of me passing out from not getting oxygen would then put us both at risk…Isn't this the same in life?

When we give in excess we emotionally "pass-out" and then no one wins!

Taking time to address these 4-key elements in your life will allow you to live with abundance, awareness, and a vibrancy that otherwise would be absent. When we give to ourselves we are more available to give to others. We have less resentment. Stress doesn't own us. Overwhelm is less and less. The feelings of 'something has to give' are non-existent. 

So, take some time in your daily life to address these 4-key elements. Give yourself the spiritual oxygen you need to fill your heart with abundance. It is okay to take time to nurture yourself, in fact it will make *YOU* a better *YOU*! We all deserve to know what we need and then address those needs. And when we do our life and the lives of the people we love ignite with joy!

Start with 5-minutes per day. Ask yourself how you can address each of these 4-elements and then commit to doing it. Watch what happens from the InsideOut! xo

Life is a journey. There are ups and downs, wins and losses, and of course times of struggles and times of peace. The hope is that no matter what life is presenting to us, we are able to see the good in it all. Not always easy - that is for sure.  Coming from a large family ( I am the youngest of 7 children) the journey can present a lot of different things. When you have so many people you are guaranteed some major bumps along the way. LOL! The advantage of that is you have the opportunity to learn from siblings mistakes and avoid doing the same ~ if you so choose to embrace the lesson. Of course your siblings have the same opportunity to learn from yours  The key is to allow life's lessons to transform you. Good or bad the lessons of life serve a purpose. But isn't that the secret? Isn't it important to explore who you are, why you are here, and what you have to offer the world in order to allow yourself to apply these life lessons? I would argue yes. In fact, I believe that people who spend most of their life in a 'down' mode are the owns who aren't quite sure where their life is headed ~ they are purpose-less. I have been thinking a lot about purpose - obviously because I just launched my new program Pursuing Purpose - but also because of some personal health struggles that my family has been facing. I have been asking those pondering questions: - What matters most? - What is my role in it all? - Do I have my priorities in order - and not the ones like paying the bills or getting to work on time - more of the spending quality time with family and friends and taking part in the things I love more ~ those kind of priorities. When you are faced with a life changing situation it is amazing how we focus on what matters most. Can we say we do this on an average day? I would say not always. But, when we take the time to explore and seek our purpose this changes. We do live with more clarity and focus; we live with intention. We know what matters most and even if we are not 100% sure we seek and patiently discover it. Today, think about your purpose beyond the things you DO. Think about who you are. Are you BEING the person you are meant to be, learning and evolving with each step in your journey? Or are you feeling a bit lost and confused as to who you are and what you are meant to BE? No matter where you are - remember it ALL matters. Want to learn more about discovering your purpose? Click here and join me for an 8-Week DIY Pursuing Purpose: A Journey To Discover Your BIG Why: http://bit.ly/1uPYlNQ

This week I spoke a lot about will, failure, and resiliency. The desire to want something so bad but not having the will to see it through. When we fail we can end up ridden with shame. All the 'should of' - 'could have's' - and ' what if's'. But, those whom are resilient tend to have a stronger staying power. They are able to fail and get themselves back in. They don't allow themselves to get caught up with emotions of shame and anger.... Anger ~ this is an intense emotion for sure!  I got to thinking how quite often shame and anger go hand in hand and in actuality anger may be the very emotion that holds us down. Anger is similar to shame in its ability to create that heavy emotional feeling. But unlike shame, which I believe is more humbling, anger simply breeds more anger. Anger doesn't allow you to to see anything but the anger. It can actually be a devastating state to be in. Is it important to allow ourselves to feel our anger? Absolutely! Feelings are feelings and they are safe to feel and explore - but once you allow them to define you, this is where it can get tricky.  Remember, thoughts will come, the emotions we attach to them is a choice!!! Anger prevents you from seeing the lesson in it all. You become the judge and jury and 9 times out of 10 you condemn yourself. You are the worst person ever, there is no hope, you will never be_____(fill in your goal!) You blame and often lack accountability, you are unable to see that it was a simple mistake and it doesn't define you. Anger allows you to beat yourself up as opposed to getting back in the game and be done with it. You become the victim and remain weak with the 'not enough' mindset. Everything is happening to you and you lack the ability to see how it is actually happening for you!  Today, allow yourself to feel your angry feelings but after that be done with it. Don't give it too much power. It is healthy to feel your feelings, but allowing it to linger will only be detrimental to your health. We all fail, no one is perfect - give yourself a break and use the energy to get back up and own your power! xo

Are you willing to fight for the things in your life that you want? Whether it be health, relationships, career - whatever it may be - are you willing to put the work in to make it happen? More important are you willing to stay the course even when that path isn't smooth and gets downright brutally challenging? I know - tough questions to ponder - but those that do think about these things tend to be more resilient. In the end, it is all about being able to get back up, wipe your knees off and get back into the game! Willpower will exhaust, that is inevitable. The human brain can only take so much - but those who have heart - those who are emotionally connected with a strong purpose - they have staying power.  Do they fail? Hell yes. But do they let that keep them down? Absolutely not!  So are you willing to fight for what your heart is intricately connected to? 9 times out of 10 - Absolutely, this is why long-term success for people who have purpose is often achieved, they rely less on willpower and more on the power of their purpose! 

How about wanting something so bad BUT not being willing to do what you have to do to get it?! Raise your hand if you can relate to this!  As a fat loss coach I speak with clients all the time about how badly they want to lose weight. They express their frustration with 'packing on the pounds' and how there is just no way they can continue on this way.  They get started with the program and they are humming along. And then all of a sudden BAM it starts. Little things start creeping back into their diet again. They hang their head low and confess of their encounter with the cookie jar at 9:30pm or finding themselves in the chip bag with little to no control. The shame is so deep, they have failed so terribly - so they think.  You know what - so do I. No one is perfect at this. No one is going to get it perfect all the time. We all want it so bad but sometimes it is just too much to think about...So you ate a cookie or ate the whole bag of chips BIG Whoop! How about all the things you did really well? How about all the other things you wanted to say "hell yes" too but you walked away? What about that? Focusing on your failure is where the epic fail is - learning from it, now that is priceless! Failure - yeah I so get this.  Sometimes our will isn't strong enough and you know what, that's ok! There are going to be times that yes, we want it, but it doesn't mean we are willing to fight for it. Maybe life is stressful and to have to think about one more thing is just way too much. Think about all the times you "failed" or went off your health and fitness kick - what was happening in your life? Where you stressed? Exhausted? This stuff is not always easy and it is made especially hard when we don't make it a part of our lifestyle but rather make it about constantly following a plan, being "good", and losing or gaining weight.  Maybe we just need to start loving ourselves right where we are? Maybe then you will be more willing to embrace your life and love yourself to true happiness, no matter what weight you are!?!?! I am not suggesting that being overweight is healthy, but I am suggesting to be careful what you are wanting so bad. If you are wanting to look just like your girlfriend does - it is not going to happen and therefore your will to fight for it will diminish over time. If you want to be a certain size you will exhaust your brain to the point that your brain will resist. Ask yourself what it is that you want so bad. If it has to do with someone else's body, numbers on a scale or in your jeans then I would caution you to re-group. What you are wanting serves no purpose to who you are. These are all superficial reasons not true goals with a strong purpose. What is your purpose for losing weight? Why do you want it so bad? Your brain will be more willing to come along for this lifestyle change - meaning - your will to make the change will be stronger if your purpose is emotionally connected versus superficially connected. This is exactly why people who want it so bad quickly become less and less willing to do what it takes - they are not fueling their will with a strong, passionate PURPOSE!  Today, stop being frustrated with yourself for wanting one thing but doing the complete opposite to achieve it. This is a red flag. This is a sign that you need to re-group and really decide if this is something you want. If it is, WHY? Why is this so important to you? Connect it to a purpose that is designed by your soul - then and only then will you achieve what you want! xo

Have you ever wondered 'Is this all there is?' I think we all may have sat back and had this thought. I could remember being in college feeling these thoughts. College was supposed to be this amazing adventure, the time of your life...but I could remember feeling like there had to be more, this couldn't be it.  I am sure there are many of you who are struggling with feelings of overwhelm. Maybe your job just doesn't let up. You are constantly on 'GO' yet you feel like that hamster on a spinning wheel - nothing ever seems to get done.  Or maybe you are a Mom or Dad raising young children and life is simply all about them. You run from here to there making sure they get to all of their activities. Your days start early and end late and each day when you put your head on the pillow you think of all the things you could have done better and of course all of the things you never got done.  Sometimes it may seem unclear as to where your life is going. They call it 'going through the motions'. You simply go through each day doing the best you can and often feeling like you are coming up short. This can allow you to get caught up into the defeatist mindset. As if no matter what you do, nothing will be good enough. Of course a lot of this we put on ourselves.  To truly understand where your life is headed you have to take the time to actually ask this question "Where is my life going?" and then be open to explore it.  - Why are you here? - Who are you when you are at your best? - What are the things that charge you up in a good way? - How do you nurture yourself - meaning, do you take time to do the things you absolutely love to do (more than once or twice per year!)? - What do you have to offer the world - your gifts and talents and do you use them? - Are you living a passionate life? - What is your purpose? Today, think about where your life is going and then take time to explore that. If you are feeling unfocused, stressed, stuck, or you just feel like there has to be something more - well, then there probably is. Take time to explore and discover your purpose on this earth. We are all here for a special reason, we just need to take the time to find out exactly what that is! xo