Jasmine

one thing i've been thinking about lately is that a lot of the things that are viewed as a sign of a person Not Doing Well are actually the healthy coping mechanisms for when things aren't going well. like crying about something is healthier than repressing it, listening to sad music helps you process your feelings, cutting your own hair is a low-stakes way to change up your life and claim agency over yourself, and in this case getting chinese takeout instead of cooking is a perfectly reasonable choice if you've had a bad or tiring day. movies will show a character eating takeout alone after a miserable day of work as if that's the sad ending to their day but the takeout isn't the sad part, the sad part is the day itself. it's mistaking the bandage for the wound

i just wanna go back to being a teenage girl doing nothing but reading books and random articles all day everyday throughout summer drinking countless glasses of iced coffee and lemonade, not having to go to work idkidk aaaaaaaaaaa

the librarian smiling when i entered the library and greeting me using my name 🥹

this happens to me all the time, especially at cafes, but instead of feeling 🥰 i always feel shy, embarrassed, and somewhat exposed—hate to admit but i overthink it in a way that once the barista remembers my name/order, i take it as a sign for me to go to other cafes cause in my head: “it must be so silly of me to go to the same place/order the same thing all the time” and if i keep going to the cafe i fear i might create this awkward bond with the employees 💀 is this what they call avoidant or am i just awkward

bingewatching will never come close to bingereading. there is nothing like blocking out the entire Earth for ten hours to read a book in one sitting no food no water no shower no bra and emerging at the end with no idea what time it is or where you are, a dried-up prune that's sensitive to light and loud noises because you've been in your room in the dark reading by the glow of a single LED. it's like coming back after a three-month vacation in another dimension and now you have to go downstairs and make dinner. absolutely transcendental