milkyruins

jay was nothing like you’d imagined him to be. in your head, your new, soon-to-be stepbrother was an ugly, rude and snobby brat who didn’t give two cents about joining your family, the jay you met in reality though? everything but that. he was sweet, and polite, and absolutely fucking gorgeous; blonde hair swept back with a strand falling over his forehead, lean shoulders outlined in the tight fitting black shirt he’d decided to wear for the occasion, and a smile worth a thousand bucks or even dying for. any words that were previously on the tip of your tongue died down when he took your hand in his to shake it, the soft feel of his skin and his bright grin making your insides positively melt and the thoughts of your parents split dissipate within seconds. 

your stepbrother’s attitude and good looks carried through the months you spent with him too. if anything, it became even more reinforced with him taking care of you whenever you needed him. he’d handle sharp objects for you while making your favourite food, hold your hand on the street if you had to cross the road, carry your bags when they got too heavy, rush in front of the door to open it for you, and so, so much more. you were at a privilege to be able to watch him walk around with nothing but a simple shirt and sweatpants around the house too, shamelessly raking your eyes over his attractive features and boring them into his back when he leaned over the stovetop to cook you ramen. 

part of you felt like a perv, for behaving this way and finding him good looking even if he objectively was. you knew it wasn’t like you could help it, you had eyes and they obviously saw what was in front of you, but you tried shoving it down anyways. it also didn’t help that jay constantly hovered around you and made your relationship out to be so.. domestic. he’d narrow his eyes when he caught you talking on the phone to your friends about your latest hook-up, lecturing you on the use of safe sex and how college boys were no good for you until you were red in the face with embarrassment, or he’d offer for the both of you to hang out together after classes ended for you every other day, draping a blanket over your figures and scooching in close to you up until you could feel his body heat radiating off of him. your dad and his new wife thought nothing of it despite your mind spinning, cooing over how well you two got along and relishing in the fact that their children were such good siblings already.

oh, if only they were aware of the twisted fantasies swirling in jongseong’s mind.

because from the minute jay saw you, he knew he had to have you. your pretty face, your soft-spoken voice, and of course, your fucking body. he felt like he was about to lose his damn mind when he first saw you walk around the house in nothing but skimpy shorts and that stupid pink top that left nothing up to the imagination. to an extent, it almost felt like you were teasing him on purpose, especially when he’d find you seated on the couch with your exposed thighs and the subtle dip of your cleavage peeking through the measly clothes that practically coaxed him to sport a hard-on right then and there. it’d be the dead of night when he’d finally find some relief after a day of watching you parade around the kitchen, wondering what it would feel like to grip your hair in a makeshift ponytail and pull your nose flush to his pelvis with him nestled deep inside your throat. and it was only when jongseong came all over his hand and sheets for the nth time after fantasising about you that he realised he needed to do something about this, whether that went against his moral compass or not.

it started with light touches. 

jay would grasp your shoulder to move past you when you were in the way, barely mumbling an ‘excuse me’ to alert you of his presence so you wouldn’t practically jump out of your skin when he did so. his hand would linger in yours for a second too long when he tried not losing you in crowds, gently commanding you to stay close to him in that stern tone of his that made your panties stick to you. it was common etiquette, you thought, he was just doing his job as a brother would normally do for his sister, but the only thing in jongseong’s mind was to make you let down your guard, let it down so much that he could swoop in at the perfect time to take advantage of it. he knew it was wrong, so sinister and dark to want to fuck his own stepsister to the point the only way he could get it up was to the thought of you, but jay didn’t care about any of that at this point, far too fucked out in his own head to think of having eyes for anyone but you.

and as expected, all throughout this, you didn’t suspect a thing. how could you? jay was so perfect, so well-mannered and so attentive. he listened to you rant about anything trivial in your life and drove you around when you wanted to meet up with your girls. he’d wake up late at night if you had a bad dream, consoling you even through the sight of your tears making him worked up, and rub your back softly when you needed to be taken care of. he’d let you sneak back in the house after you’d told your dad you were going out to the library to study, making up excuses for you when your lies fell short. he had your back, and in turn, you had his, so you would’ve never thought of him as anything but a gentleman and big brother.

until everything he did grew into more. 

until having an arm behind your carseat while looking into the rearview mirror turned into placing his hand on your thigh, inches away from the seam of your skirt. until sitting next to him while watching a movie with a shared blanket turned into him nuzzling against you under the covered fabric. until having dinner with both your parents present at the dinner table turned into his foot grazing against yours ever so slightly.

until your honey-like voice calling out for him to help you get the glass on the top cabinet turned into full blown moans of you getting eaten out on the living room couch, echoing throughout the empty house because of-fucking-course, your parents were out for the night on a dinner date.

you weren’t even sure how it happened. one minute, you were struggling to reach on your tippy toes, your mouth instinctively moving to utter jay’s name because he was the only one besides you at home who could help out, but the next, he was pressing up against you to the point of grinding himself into your ass, causing you both to inhale sharply. you vaguely recall turning around, ready to ask what your stepbrother was doing when you’d caught sight of his darkened eyes, practically eyeing you like a piece of meat. and by the time anything even registered in your mind, his lips were already on yours, and his hand was dragging you over to the couch in record time.

“j-jay, we shouldn’t be doing this.” you stuttered out, your voice meek and quiet as you tried not to roll your eyes back at the sight of him slurping up your juices. he didn’t respond, instead opting to move his mouth up to focus on your clit, sucking it into the hot cavern and rolling his tongue against it to the point it had you seeing stars. you knew it was wrong, going against so many moral standpoints and rules, but god did it feel so good. you quickly came to understand that the jay who was going down on you currently was nothing like the jay who engages with you in your day to day life. that jay is gentle, well-meaning and answers all your questions despite how dumb they may seem. but this jay? he’s fucking filthy, messy to the point you can tell your juices are dribbling down his chin.

“fuck, you taste so good.” he gasps out when he finally decides to pull away. “thought about this so much when jerking off.” your eyes widen at his crude admittance, and you know you really should be disgusted at it, but something about the idea of jay being alone in the darkness of his room, hand wrapped around himself while saying your name under his breath only makes you wet, even more so than you already are. at the back of your mind, something screams at you to stop, but you’ve already gotten a taste of what your stepbrother can provide you, and you’d be damned if you didn’t stick around to find out more about it. 

“this is wrong.” you quietly admit anyways, even if it’s not what you want to say. but jay just hums, leaning down to hover above your figure as his arms cage you in underneath him, doing very little to help the fact of how much smaller you feel below him. his lips ghost the shell of your ear as you shiver at the proximity between you two, and he gently nips at it, leaving you biting your tongue to hold back the noises you long yearn to let out. “i know it is, baby, but doesn’t it feel so fucking good?” jay questions with a low chuckle, pulling away to cock his head to the side. you curse internally at the way the nickname sounds coming from him, a dust of light pink spreading across your cheeks because fuck, how can someone be so alluring at all times?

“don’t you want to feel even better, princess?” jay’s voice draws you out, and you hold back a moan at the way he grinds his clothed bulge against your bare opening, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’s slowly convincing you over to the dark side. “don’t you want your big brother to spread this pussy open and fuck it ‘till you’re crying from how good it feels?” you almost nod, trying to resist the urge to buck your hips up to catch the sensation of his lower region against you once more. instead, you choose to turn your face away from his striking gaze staring you down, but jay just grips your jaw and turns you to face him once more, the action only making your insides swirl with delight.

“still, what if your mom and my dad find out?” you mumble, and jay just grins wickedly. he swoops in, dipping his head down to capture your lips in a searing kiss that makes you giddy with joy, sneaking his tongue past the opening of your mouth to lick into it. when he pulls back, there’s a thin line of spit connection you both, prompting you to squirm at the sight to which jay’s chest rumbles with laughter. “you’re so fucking cute, y’know that? been dreaming of having your pretty body underneath me since i met you.” he admits lowly, your wide eyes only spurring him on further. “wanna know what i think?” you slowly nod, unsure of where this is going. jay’s voice drops an octave lower as he leans in close and whispers—

“i think you’re a dirty, little slut who deserves to get fucked by her big brother.”

you can’t help the whimper that escapes you at his words this time, and that’s all the confirmation jay needs to sit up and tear off his shirt, bringing to life all the fantasies you’ve had about his body this entire time. you can’t stop yourself from reaching out a hand to touch him, nails grazing across the ridges of his toned stomach and the dip of his v-line that’s hiding the very thing you’ve been craving under his sweatpants. meanwhile, jay just watches you with lust swirling in his orbs, a small smirk playing at his swollen lips as he takes in the picture of your innocent little face ogling his figure. “you like what you see, don’t you, pretty?” he murmurs, biting his lip at the way you nod in shame. “don’t worry.” jay grunts, standing momentarily to loop his fingers inside the edges of his pants. “you’ll get what you’re craving real soon.” he winks before he’s yanking the only thing separating you both down, exposing himself in all his glory to your awaiting eyes at last. 

“goddamnit, it’s pretty.” you think to yourself when your eyes finally settle on your stepbrother’s dick. the tip is an angry shade of red, dribbling with a few beads of precum that your face falls at when jay swipes them away with his thumb as he wraps his large hand around himself. your disappointment is short-lived, however, because he’s back on top of you soon, holding the very same thumb up to your awaiting mouth to taste, to which you eagerly wrap your lips around, the salty flavour of him invading your senses. “good girl.” jongseong commends as you suckle at the tip of his finger, the praise going straight to your core. he pulls his hand away from you after a short while, that same wet thumb snaking its way down to find your clit and pressing against it, which does nothing but rip a noise of satisfaction from you. jay continues to rub at your engorged nub, his gaze fixated on the sight of your pussy as if he’s trying to commit it to memory.

“shit. i can’t wait any more.” he growls after another second, retracting his hand to wrap it around himself instead, pumping once or twice before he’s pressing the head against your awaiting entrance. you watch with bated breath as he rubs against your folds, slicking up with your oozing juices until your patience starts wearing thin. “jay,” you huff after a minute, legs kicking up in frustration as your stepbrother glances at you teasingly. “what do you want, angel? use your big girl words and tell me.” he smiles, almost innocent to the point you even forget the compromising position you’re both in.

“want.. want you.” you admit shyly, averting your eyes to a forgotten corner in the room as jay tsk’s. “look at me when you speak, whore.” he spits out, his entire demeanour changing in an instant. it only makes you leak even more, and you swallow thickly, eyes pleading. “please fuck me, please. wan’ you to do what you said, spreading me open and using me until i cry, please, please, please. jjongie, daddy, please, i—“

you don’t even get the chance to finish because by the time both the nickname and title leave your mouth, jay has long lost his composure, instantly pushing inside you as he attempts to bottom out his large cock. he hisses at the way your warm walls envelop him, and the only thing you can do is cry out at the way you’re being stretched out to your limit, finally having the emptiness inside you satiated with the presence of your stepbrother’s dick. “fuuuck, that’s it, look at this tiny, little hole sucking me in.” jay curses, and you flare red in embarrassment at his nasty words, ignoring the way they only make you gush around him even more. 

“i’m going to absolutely ruin you, baby.” is the only thing jay says before he’s pulling out and slamming himself back into you, leaving you to cry out as his mushroom tip instantly hits that one spot deep inside. his thrusts are erratic, filled with a fervour none of the other guys you’ve ever slept with had, and you think the way he’s fucking you now is definitely going to rectify his promise of fucking you until you’re crying, the occasion seeming to be very well on its way of happening. 

“fuck, there is no way this is the last time we’re doing this.” jay groans, the noise of skin slapping and your moans echoing throughout the living room as he continues absolutely drilling you. each drag of his cock drives into you with sheer power and raw desire to completely destroy you it seems, and you’re sure nobody is ever going to top it. “gonna use you everywhere, every time i please. you want that too, don’t you? tell me you do, princess. tell me and daddy will fuck you like he means it every single time.” he blurts out. the only way you can respond is through incoherently mumbling and the nodding of your head, far too dazed out already at the way your stepbrother is pounding into you, which only draws a breathy laugh from jay. “seems i’ve fucked you dumb already, huh? cock that good? so good it’s got my baby all dumb?” he taunts. you only whine at his words, drool spilling out from the side of your lips which jay wipes off with a chuckle.

“i’m already close, god.” he sighs, his movements unrelenting and balls tightening with the way they slap against your ass. “want me to cum inside you? for daddy to breed this pussy full? maybe i should do it and make you walk around with my seed lodged deep in your messy cunt.” jay hisses, his hand snaking it ways to your neck as he continues talking. “bet you’d like that ‘cause you’re a filthy fucking bitch. letting your stepbrother fuck your tight cunt as he pleases.” slender fingers wrap around the skin and tighten their grip slightly to restrict your airflow, and that’s all it takes to abruptly push you over the edge, leaving you dropping your mouth open in a silent scream as you cum. jay continues fucking you through your high, making out your small mewls amongst the lewd sounds of his cock shoving into your hole. 

“good girl, good fucking girl. did so well for me, came so much all for daddy. you’re so, so good to me, princess. fuck, i love you.” jay blabbers as he lets go of your neck, too lost in chasing his own peak to even realise what he’s just admitted. you don’t catch it fully either in your haze of overstimulation that he continues to fuck you through, but some unconscious part of you mutters it back as best as you can somehow. jay’s heart swells at the way you take him, so small and pliant for him to just use for his own good, and he leans in to smash his lips against yours, drinking in your loud sounds as his movements start to falter with his upcoming release washing over him. 

“just a bit more, pretty, just a bit. such a good fucking girl for daddy, letting him use your body, fuck. i’m gonna cum deep inside you, angel. gonna reward you with my cum. you’d like that, wouldn’t you? like me to creampie this precious hole?” jay stammers out, the coil in his stomach close to snapping. he’s not sure how much longer he can keep up his exterior, sweat dripping down his forehead and closed eyes as his tired hips continue ramming his cock into you. he feels you wrap your arms around his neck, cracking his orbs open to find your fucked out face mumbling for his cum, your legs wrapping against his waist to keep him locked into you. 

“cum in me, daddy, please cum in me. wan’ your cum, i’ll take it like a good girl. please, daddy.” you babble, and that’s all it takes to send jay over the edge too, loud groans leaving his mouth as he shoots thick ropes of white inside your walls, painting them with his release. he cums for what feels like forever, holding your body close to his as his cock throbs inside your spasming cunt that’s still greedily sucking him in, urging him to fill you up. he finally stops after seemingly a good minute, panting against your neck where he’s buried his face into as he lets the post-orgasm bliss wash over himself.

“fuck,” jay heaves a breath once he’s finally recovered, making sure to use his softening cock to keep you plugged up in fear his cum will drip down and stain the couch, much less make your scandalous activities known to both your parents. he knows he’s going to have to face the reality of everything soon, but for now, he chooses to ignore it, propping himself up with an arm as he takes a look at your tired face that’s still so beautiful even after he basically fucked you within an inch of your life.

“you okay?” he asks softly after a while, prompting you to open your eyes and look up at him. there’s so much love and adoration in them that it makes jay feel all gooey inside, and when you nod with a small smile on your lips, he can’t help but lean back in and kiss you, desperately wishing this won’t be the last time he feels your mouth on his. “you think we made a mess?” you wonder out loud with a giggle once he’s pulled away, and jay just laughs breathlessly at you, brushing a strand of loose hair out of your face to take a proper look. “i’ll clean it up if so, don’t worry, baby.” he reassures in a quiet voice, leaving you to hum in agreement as a response.

“jay.” 

“hm?”

“..what now?” 

jay inhales when you bring forth the question he doesn’t have an answer to, looking down at you to find your worried expression staring back at him. he coos when you jut out your bottom lip, brushing a thumb against your cheek smoothly as he sighs. “don’t worry about that now, princess. just sleep.” he murmurs. 

he can tell you’re not entirely satisfied with his admission, and that you want to say something more, but even if you do, you choose not to, instead opting to follow his advice and shutting your eyes by letting the fatigue from what you’d just been through take over your body. jongseong watches as you slowly close off your thoughts and mind, gently resting his body weight on top of you in favour of pulling you closer. he tries to avoid thinking of the inevitable that’ll come to wake him up, but he’ll deal with that later, choosing to bask in this moment with you for as long as he can before he has to face reality. instead, he presses a small kiss to your cheek, nuzzling it with his nose before closing his own eyes. he eventually drifts off to dreamland, where his thoughts will still be filled with your face.

. . . 

College Crush!Felix, who greeted you cheerfully while skillfully guiding you through the list of their available snacks and drinks. You were too stunned by how handsome he was to properly pay attention, so when he eventually asked what you wanted to order, you made the mistake of blurting out “your number” instead.

College Crush!Felix, who goodnaturedly laughed at your burning embarrassment before asking you what else you’d like. Despite his voice adding to the transformation of your brain into mush, you quickly stated your order and name, making sure to pay before scurrying to an available table next to their stall. 

College Crush!Felix, who left his number on your drink’s cup for you to discover once you’ve fled the scene. The horrified screech that came out of you when you saw his note to message him with a winky face was probably enough to burn into the eardrums of everyone who heard it.

College Crush!Felix, who was distracted for the rest of the day, constantly checking for new messages on his phone. He didn’t let it show, but he was more disappointed than he thought he would be when the day ended and you still hadn’t contacted him. You, on the other hand, were stressed about what to put as your first message.

College Crush!Felix, whom you saw again a day later at the cafeteria. You watched as his eyes widen in recognition when both your eyes met by accident. The light clamoring of his utensils snapped you out of your daze to realize he’s heading in your direction. A part of you wanted to run away, but the excited look on his face kept you still.

College Crush!Felix, who shot you rapid-fire questions, before turning quiet and asking if you were interested in going on a date. Your brain near short-circuited, but not before you squeaked out a yes. If you noticed him let out a shaky breath of relief, you didn’t comment on it.

College Crush!Felix, who constantly sent you messages after finally getting your number, leaving you confused about how natural he made the relationship seem. A good morning and good night message has always been a guarantee since then. 

College Crush!Felix, whose friends kept side-eyeing him whenever a pitched giggle came out of his mouth whenever he got a message from you. He’s found you cute since the day you two met at the festival, and couldn’t believe his luck.

College Crush!Felix, who you found out was pretty well-known in their department for being both friendly and attractive. Fortunately, all your thoughts of being intimidated were quickly shut down when he turned down someone’s confession in front of you while saying he was already interested in someone else. You tried to push the swirling feeling you felt in your stomach at the fondness in his eyes while looking over at you.

College Crush!Felix, who kept finding ways to be with you. A date turned into two, and more followed that. Most of the time they were casual though, so you weren’t too sure of where the two of you stood. Either way, it was always an enjoyable time that kept you wanting more.

College Crush!Felix, whom you eventually learned more about as you two spent time together. The booth they ran at the festival made so much more sense when you found out he liked baking. A spontaneous baking competition in his dorm room followed a few days after that information came to light. It was hard not to leave yourself staring at him while he mixed the batter with a concentrated look on his face.

College Crush!Felix, who would always call you to keep you on the line while he’s playing online games. He says he does this since he gets lonely when he’s playing alone, but in reality, he thinks you’re like a lucky charm. He’s never lost a game whenever he was on a call with you, and he believes that it's you that makes him feel calmer under pressure. You let it be, loving the commentaries that filled your otherwise silent dorm room.

College Crush!Felix, who, despite being in a different major, tries to study with you whenever your schedules allow for it. He’s surprisingly good at giving mock questions with only your notes and lesson material as the basis, so you always take his offers. Little did you know that he'd never tried this hard at studying unless it was to help you.

College Crush!Felix, who started a tradition on Fridays, where he gives you enough baked goods to last for the entire weekend or more. He says that a good rest needs good food, which, in his vocabulary, apparently means stuffing yourself with snacks. Regardless, it always puts a giddy smile on your face whenever he hands you over the filled tupperwares.

College Crush!Felix, who eventually confessed that the real reason he wanted to give you snacks was to make sure you had something to eat even if you couldn't make or buy food. He was so concerned when he learned you skipped meals during a particularly busy week. Even though he already makes sure to remind you to have meals, it makes him feel better to know you always have an available option.

College Crush!Felix, who also brought brownies to bribe your friends into liking him for you when you scheduled to let them meet. His palms were getting awfully sweaty at the pressure of being on the receiving end of their questions. You watched him exaggeratedly slump over in exhaustion after they gave their blessings and left the area.

College Crush!Felix, who suddenly asked you on a formal dinner date out of the blue. When you asked him why he was going through such lengths with you, he innocently commented on how he should do this much as your boyfriend.

College Crush!Felix, who has seen you as his significant other for the past few months that he forgot he hasn’t actually asked you to be officially his yet. He wasted no time in finally asking the question over dinner as a waiter took both of your finished plates, to which you of course said yes. You two got a complimentary dessert because of that. 

College Boyfriend!Felix, who believes you came from the heavens, always appreciates how your presence makes him feel so complete.

MASTERTAG ━ STATUS: OPEN — ASK OR COMMENT 🫶

a smile tugged at the corner of your mouth. "i really appreciate it, felix. i've been so busy with planning the lower school assembly that i couldn't make it."

felix grimaced a bit. "yeah, you've seemed busier recently."

"but," your eyes lit up. "i have some wonderful student helpers this year. they've been loads of help."

his expression softened. "that's great." he paused a bit before continuining. "need any help with anything? i can make myself available to plan with you or set things up; i'm also happy to bring you hot cocoa more often."

your heart warmed at his consideration. you flipped through your planner, noting everything that still needed to be done. "actually, there doesn't seem to be much in terms of logistics. i'd really love your help setting up for the assembly though. that would be amazing, lix." your eyebrows practically shot up. everything grew hot. "shi- i mean, sorry, that wasn't intentional."

felix giggled a bit. "you're welcome to call me that. although i have to admit, the only person who really calls me that is olivia."

this only helped to fan the flames that were scorching your face further. your gaze latched onto the fine grain of your desk. damn, there were a lot of eraser shavings.

as you finally regained a sliver of composure, you turned to face him again.  pointing at the clock sitting on your desk, you spoke "i think i have to kick you out, sir. class starts in five for us."

"imagine starting class at 8:30. kindergarten can't relate." he flicked his hair, which was slowly starting to grow into the prettiest mullet ever. you laughed with him for a bit, before shoving him out the door.

he stopped in the doorway. "i think i'll stop by more in the mornings. you're going to need the sugar fix!" you couldn't tell if he was talking about the hot cocoa or his sweetheart self.

"i'll look forward to it then."

-

as felix continued to deliver you hot drinks and casual banter in the morning (and you got more comfortable with calling him lix, as he insisted it was okay), a strange murmur rose from your third graders. when these morning chats began, your third graders looked on, moon-eyed and curious. you heard them mention you and "mystery teacher" during break time every once in a while.

but then, the third graders began to conspire. whispers of your involvement swept over the entirety of the third grade class.

yoomi, the sweetest little student of yours, waddled over to you during recess. "teacher l/n, how long have you and teacher lee been married?"

you laughed it off, cringing internally. "we're not even dating, little love."

your student pouted. "you're lying!" then she sprinted to join her friends on the monkey bars, anxious to spread the (fake) news.

when retelling this to felix the next day, he almost collapsed onto the floor in a laughing fit. after barely managing to catch his breath, felix responded. "your kiddos are so cute!"

you brought your hand to your forehead, mildly frustrated. "you don't care about the dignity of your professional career, lix? or your love life?"

felix chuckled some more. "there's no love life to tarnish, teach." he stared wistfully at your kiddos, who were starting to file in for the day. "plus, what harm is it? they seem to be enjoying themselves."

indignation fired you up, boiling your blood. "but they might not be able to concentrate on my teachings if they see me just as the epicenter of a crazy romantic drama! what about their future academic careers? they-"

felix leaned over your desk to grab your hand, effectively startling you into silence. you didn't realize how loud your voice grew until the a hush ran through the room. he squeezed it softly.

"y/n, you're a fantastic teacher. you're caring, smart, and always put your kiddos first. they could never forget that. okay?"

you exhaled slowly. "thanks, lix. but..." you motioned towards your conspicuously intertwined hands which the children absolutely ate up. his eyes widened as he released your hands. felix scratched the back of his head apologetically.

"i should probably head out, right?" with that, he promptly exited. you might have been imagining things, but his freckled cheeks seemed to be extra red.

-

oh holy mother of jesus, take the wheel.

you ran around the auditorium, giving instructions, answering questions, and trying your best not to lose your fucking mind. but honestly, it wasn't as bad as you thought it would be, thanks a certain someone, who was currently helping your kids open a really stubborn door. why didn't anyone think to replace these ancient storage closet doors?

you paused to watch felix tussle with the door some more. was he going to be okay doing physical labor in that nice button up and tie? well, he proved you wrong by opening it gracefully. but soon afterward, he and the kiddos were met with a torrent of dust bunnies.

you began to laugh, catching your crush's attention. he gave the helpers some last instructions before making his way over to you. "something funny to you?"

"n-no" you managed between giggles. he cocked his eyebrow at you playfully. you guys joked around some more. despite the stress of... everything, really, being around felix put your heart at ease.

as you two were immersed in your separate world, your third graders became to initiate phase one of their master plan to put you two together. all eyes were on yoomi as she walked towards the almost-couple with burning purpose.

"teacher l/n and teacher lee," she began, pointing at the wad of tangled christmas lights by the door. "can you two help us with that?"

you grinned. "absolutely." you turned towards felix, eyes set ablaze by a challenge. "lix?"

he teasingly rolled your eyes at your shenanigans. "sure, let's go."

the entirety of your third grade class held their breaths as you walked towards the absolute mess that was that string of lights. when you two finally arrived in front of the lights, a cheer erupted from your helper pals.

you quickly spun around, confused by their reaction. a very helpful student pointed above both of your heads, where a haphazardly-taped mistletoe hung. definitely the work of your third graders, no doubt.

"shit." you whispered, careful so that none of your students could witness your potty mouth.

you turned back towards felix, who was clearly stupefied.

yoomi, carefully tucked behind the menorah display, yelled. "now fall in love, lovebirds!" a chorus of giggles sounded as they waited for their otp to kiss and subsequently fall in love.

all you could hear was the rapid drumming of your heart. did this mean you really had to kiss your workplace crush in front of your kiddos? what would this do to your relationship? your professional career?

he slowly approached you and grabbed a hold of your hand. your kiddos held their breaths as he leaned in-

and lifted your hand towards his lips. you combusted on the spot.

"is that enough?" felix asked your helpers, who nodded, accepting their bitter defeat.

as they turned back to their original assignments, felix dragged you out of the auditorium and into the empty teacher's lounge.

"are you okay?" he asked, worry scrunching his brow together.

you nodded slowly, trying to regain your composure. "yeah. thanks for..." your heart squeezed at the thought of his princely hand kiss. "being considerate with me."

he shook his head. "it's the least i could've done." and paused, looking down. "and i'm sorry that i totally disregarded your concerns earlier this week. your kiddos are getting out of hand." 

"it's fine. i'll talk to admin about this eventually, but we should probably head back."

as much as you needed to be back in the auditorium, helping with set-up, you couldn't get yourself to move when he was looking at you like that.

he took a step towards you, averting your gaze. then another. you could see each individual freckle now and it was driving you crazy. "can i... can i ask you a stupid question?"

your breath caught. "always."

felix reached for your hand, rubbing his thumb against your knuckles. "i know this isn't proper of coworkers, but i have to ask or i'm going to go insane." he took a long breath. "i really like you. always have. can i kiss you, for real?"

you willed your brain to stop short-circuiting on you. "go on then." you breathed, tugging lightly on his tie.

and he was all too eager to fulfill your request.

the feeling of his lips on yours felt like fireworks. and you did the thing you always dreamed of-- you greedily carded your hands through his luscious blonde locks, lapping up the quiet moans he let out with every tug and pull.

when you separated for air, you began to giggle at the sight. "lix, your hair."

his usually well-tamed hair was an absolute mess. "ah, i'm so sorr-"

he kissed you again, this time soft and sweet. "don't apologize. i really enjoyed it."

a whole heat wave flooded over you. "should we head back then?" you needed out now before you fully melted.

"wait." you looked up at him. he shot you a hopeful, doe-eyed glance. "does that mean you like me back?"

Content warning: This is entirely a work of fiction and not affiliated with real Too Hot To Handle show.

LANA: I'm not only putting the two to the test by sending them to the private suite tonight, I'm doing a test of trust to the rest of my guests.

If they believe that they wouldn't break any rules, the $33.000 will be returned to the prize fund.

However, if they put their trust in them and they go on to break any rules, the prize fund will drop by a further $33.000.

-

The night has just started and you already feel like folding before him.

As you lay on the bed looking up at him, his eyes travel down your body and undress you in the process, making you feel naked even though you still have your clothes on.

"Stop looking so sexy," he says, collapsing onto the bed next to you.

How do you not think of sex when everything in the room is pointing at it?

Not forgetting to mention that Felix is looking so fine tonight. He's wearing a sleeveless white top that showcases his toned body and his dark hair is brushed to the back with a few strands falling over his forehead. This gorgeous man has his eyes on you and you have all of his attention on you, only you.

Teasing used to be your favorite game to play and tonight, you want to know if you still have the game in you.

You hook your finger on the opening of his shirt and lowly ask, "What do you want to do first?" 

From the way he needs a moment to give you an answer, he must have so many ideas in his head.

"First, I'll take your clothes off," he says.

"Yep."

He puts his hand on your waist, "Then I'll give you head."

"And I'll return the favor after," you quickly add, showing him that you like to play fair, including on the bed.

You see his eyes light up at your offer, "and after that..."

You use the triangle eye trick of looking at his eyes, then down to his lips, and when he's about to notice, return to look at his eyes again.

"And after that?" You repeat his words with a low, sultry voice.

His eyes shift to the selection of fun things on the bedside table, condoms, lubricants, and sex toys.

"We'll do some more foreplay. Use a sex toy or two," his voice is getting deeper the more he lets his imagination run wild.

To close the gap, you turn to lay on your stomach and lean in close to his face. Lowering your voice as you ask, "And after that?"

It doesn't take a genius to know that he's imagining it in his head as he delivers those bad yet sexy ideas. He takes a deep breath and then gives you the only right answer there is.

"Sex," he says.

He glides his hand down your spine and rests it on the curve of your ass, "Lots and lots of sex."

So far, you like all of the plans he has for you and you're tempted to give all that to him, "What are you waiting for then?"

-

YOU: I promise to not break any rules but I didn't say that I'll be good [smirks]

-

The night is still far from done but Felix is already put to a hard test.

He calms himself and pushes all the lewd thoughts away. He takes his hand back and puts it on your shoulder, twirling your hair in his fingers.

"We can't break any rules tonight," he reminds you but it's also a reminder to himself.

"I know," you say but manage to pop open two buttons on his shirt without him knowing.

Frustrated by the things he wants to do but he's not allowed to, Felix lays back on the bed and groans. After a while, he rolls over and eclipses half of your body with his.

"What do you want to do then, baby?" You ask again when all the ideas in his head at the moment are bad.

He lifts his head and brings his mouth close to your ear, "I want to have you in my mouth."

You giggle hearing his naught request and slip your hand under his shirt, touching the warm skin on his back.

"How about a bath?" You suggest.

What makes you think seeing you naked is going to help him? But he finds himself agreeing to it with a nod.

-

FELIX: I'm going to mess up, am I? [Closes eyes]

-

The wine fizzles and spurts out of the bottle the second Felix pops open the bottle of champagne.

He brings the bottle to the bathroom and holding two champagne flutes in the other hand, sees you running the bath with bubbles forming on the surface of the water.

You chug a glass of wine in one go and turn the faucet off once the bath is ready.

You know what looks best on you? Confidence. You maintain eye contact with him as you strip all of your clothes right in front of him, brazenly sending his brain into overdrive.

You've been wearing nothing underneath that dress and he could have touched you there without him knowing.

Felix can't wrap his head around the fact that you're undeniably sexy and hot and attractive. It's overwhelming that he bites his fist.

You carefully step into the tub not to slosh the water and fill your glass with more wine, "You're not getting in?"

Felix is barely functioning, he has to force his brain to work and unconsciously move like he's no longer in control of his body. He removes his clothes and gets into the other end of the tub.

"Isn't it nice?" Your foot is rubbing his shin under the water and it's getting dangerous as you stretch it out, closer to his hardening member.

Felix has to pull your foot out of the water to stop you and gently bites on your toe as a way to get back at you, earning a shriek from you.

"Is it delicious?"

"I have to taste it again," he says, putting your toe into his mouth and sucking on it.

-

FELIX: I get a feeling that she enjoyed teasing me.

-

The lingerie you packed with you served its purpose.

The fabric is sheer and lacey, covering bits of your body yet exposing just enough to arouse your conquest.

Felix has his hands tucked under his pillow and you believe is to prevent them from touching you.

He's helpless as you're straddling him on the bed, your hand is on his chest and your head is thrown to back as you drain your glass of champagne.

Now with your attention back on him, Felix gets nervous once again, looking like he's about to break under your lustful gaze.

"Are you hard?" You lowly ask, lightly rubbing his abs with your fingertips.

Felix has been taking low, deep breaths but it seems like no matter how many sighs he lets out, it doesn't help him relax.

"You're sitting right on my boner, baby," he shamelessly answers.

Well, you can feel it poking under you, that's the result of the things you've been doing to him. Not sure if you're proud of that but it seems like you still got the game in you.

You flash him a sly smile and lean in, sending the end of your hair brushing his bare chest as you deeply stare into his eyes.

"Why aren't you touching me?" You ask as if you didn't know the answer already.

His teeth faintly bite his lower lip, you're really making it hard for him. He relents, taking his hands from under the pillow to rest them on your thighs.

"You want me to break rules, mmh?" He lightly pinches the flesh there and kneads on it.

There's a way to answer that. You drag your hand down his abdomen and stop once your fingers meet the waistband of his boxer, mischievously teasing him by tugging your fingers into it.

-

YOU: It's a double-edged sword. Teasing him makes me horny too.

-                                                       

The lights are about to go out soon.

Felix turns you over and has you caged between his arms, looking at your face, oblivious to the fact that his blood is rushing to that one part of his body and it wants what it wants.

He's so hard he feels faint and you're being irresistible right now, giving him the eyes all night.

"I'm so horny," you whine as you put your hands around his neck.

Again, it's not helping him with his urges. Letting him know that you want this too only makes him want to give it to you.

"Oh, you have no idea!" Felix mutters with a heavy sigh.

The mewl you let out as Felix puts his whole body on top of you arouses him so much. He wants to do more than just put his body on top of you, especially since this is the first time you and him have privacy in the villa. Sans the camera in every corner of the room, of course!

"How about we do it?" He asks with his mouth pressed close to your ear.

You wrap your legs around his waist and pull him closer, moaning as he places a hot kiss on your neck.

"This is bad," you say, tugging at his hair but it's a fruitless effort to stop him from turning to the other side and kissing your neck again

"Oh, yes..."

-

FELIX: I really want to spend money [bites lips]

-

Felix watches as you space out, still gathering your senses after waking up from a long yet incredible night.

When you're fully awake, you turn to look at him and softly smile.

He looks so cute with his hair tousled and his freckles look even more apparent on his bare face.

"Bedhead," you shortly say, tidying the mess on his hair by combing it with your fingers.

He does the same to your hair, untangling the end of your hair with his fingers.

"What do you think of last night?" You casually ask but he can hear your sly smile without having to look.

He kisses your head and inhales the smell of your shampoo, "Very eventful," he answers.

-

YOU: We barely got any sleep last night.

-

To make the best of the time in the suite, Felix decides to pamper you with one thing that he knows he's good at. He waits as you take your bra off then lie down on your stomach so he can give you a back massage.

He kneels on the bed, trapping your body between his legs, and begins to slowly lather your skin in aromatic oil, applying enough pressure on your back to relax your muscles even though he's doing it just to feel you all over.

"Oh, that feels good," you delightfully sigh.

He knows what he's doing but the moans you let out oh... sending his head going places.

Felix lowers his hands to your hips and only lets himself go that far, even though it would be a good chance to knead on your ass too.

"Oh, yeah..." you moan again as he massages your shoulders as you sit in front of him, clutching on a bathrobe to cover your bare chest.

Felix is more than eager to please you and wants to hear more of your beautiful moans, but it's time to get ready for the day.

-

FELIX: I don't know how we're going to face everyone [lets out a long sigh] I'm a little worried.

-

Everyone else is already waiting in the cabana.

Felix holds your hand as you both make your way there and after seeing them, he immediately feels guilty and looks away from them.

"So?" Jamie asks him with a voice tinted with concern.

Felix shrugs and looks down, "I'll let Lana talk," he says.

Lana chimes in just right on time, the cone lights up and starts talking without greeting 

"Last night, I put you to a test to see if you can adhere to my rules while alone in a suite."

Cole sucks air through his neat, white teeth, "we're screwed, aren't we?" He mutters under his breath.

"But that's not all. I also give your fellow guests a test of trust in you."

-

YOU: What the hell?

-

"I can now reveal the group chose to trust you," Lana informs.

Felix is lost and tries to find any clues from everyone but they seem to be in their panic mode to care to explain it to him.

"Which means if you adhered to my rules, you will win back the $33.000 you lost yesterday. However, if you break a single rule, a further $33.000 would be deducted from the prize fund."

His jaws hung open, he didn't know that Lana would do this behind him, putting him at risk of doing severe damage.

"Guys..." he says in disbelief.

"You stake that much money on us?"

Cole shrugs and chooses not to answer him.

-

FELIX: [Pinches the bridge of his nose] This is not good.

-

Since no one can get any clues from him, they turn to you and Maeve is the first one to take her shot.

"You didn't break any rules, right babe?"

You uneasily glance at Felix and sigh, also refusing to answer.

Lana takes over the situation again, "Both of you were very busy last night."

He can hear frustrated groans from everyone in there.

"The question is: Did you break the rules?"

Felix grabs your hand to seek comfort from you and prepares himself for what's coming.

"I can now reveal..."

Lana is dragging it to build suspense and possibly, a cliffhanger to end the episode.

"I must tell the group that..."

-

YOU: Lana, just get it over with. Please?

-

"They did not break any rules."

Felix finally can drop his act of putting on a guilty face and laughs as he watches everyone celebrating him for not having sex. He never thought he would experience this in life.

Cole comes running and hugs him, "I am so proud of you, man!"

Once everyone has taken their turns to hug and congratulate him, they're back in their seats.

"I'm not going to sit and act like it was easy. I almost folded, a few times," Felix confesses with a proud smile.

Killian nods in agreement, "I bet, mate, I bet."

"I am pleased to announce that you have both passed my test. Therefore, the prize fund has been reimbursed by $33.000 and now stands at $119.000."

It's like everyone got charged with more energy but Felix fears that now the money is back, they want to spend it on themselves.

"As a reward for passing my test, I'm sending you on a date this afternoon," Lana announces before saying goodbye.

-

FELIX: I am determined to prove that what we have is not just a physical connection and we proved that today.

-

The boys are so curious about last night that they don't wait to ask about the details.

"How did you do it?" Josh asks.

Felix snorts then answers, "Well, it wasn't easy."

Cole is so enthusiastic to hear about everything, probably because he's busy being a sex cop makes him forget to have some fun of his own.

"It was hard. Literally and figuratively," Felix shares with a deep laugh.

"At one point, I thought I was going to pass out," he adds.

That sends everyone burst into laughter, making fun of his suffering but in return, he gets the satisfaction from making them jealous.

-

YOU: I'm looking forward to our date. I'll use this chance to get to know him better and make some real connections.

-

It will be your second date together with Felix but you feel more nervous than the first one.

It gets worse when he sees you walking out of the make-up room, smiling at the sight of you. You're wearing a white sundress and tied your hair into a bun, exposing the nape of your skin because you know he likes to kiss you there.

"Gosh! You're so beautiful," he says as he kisses you on the cheek.

"The most beautiful girl," he corrects his first remark with a smile that doesn't wear off even for a second.

You drop your hand to let him hold it, clasped it together as you both walk to the spot where they have prepared a nice picnic at the beach.

He helps you sit on the picnic mat and takes out the food from inside a basket while you set it in the space between. He pops open a bottle of chilled champagne for a start and proposes a toast.

"Here's to making real connections!"

You clink your glasses together and take a sip at the same time. You pick on sliced fruits and feed them to him, licking your fingers after you shove a whole strawberry into his mouth.

-

FELIX: I'm on a date in a beautiful place with the most beautiful girl in the retreat.

-

Felix notices that you've been looking at him long enough it starts to make him nervous.

"Trying not to kiss me, huh?" He jokingly says with a sly grin plastered on his face.

You take a sip of your champagne before putting it away, centering your focus on him, "I get the impression that you're a man of physical affection," you say.

The observation is not wrong. Felix has always been a man of physical affection, that's his love language.

"I grew up in a very affectionate family. Hugs, kisses... we do all that. I even kissed my mum before leaving to come here," he admits with a shy smile.

"Don't be embarrassed. I think that's adorable," you tell him while picking a sliced melon from the bowl.

"I grew up with a belief that affection isn't affection without actions, you know?"

You nod as you chew and you wipe your hand with a napkin.

"With Lana and the rules, it's so hard for me... how am I going to make a connection without touching?" He explains and leans back with his hand propped next to him.

"Like... I can tell you 'I like you' so many times but I don't think that's enough for me, I have to show you either through a hug or a kiss..." his words trail off as he's aware that he has just opened up to you and he feels something that he hasn't feel for a long time.

You sit straighter, folding your legs to the side, and look into his eyes, "I understand."

-

YOU: The last relationship I had made me scared to try to open my heart to someone.

-

The sun is slowly setting for the day and the wind is blowing warm, salty air, sending your hair floating in the air.

One bad experience doesn't mean that the next one is going to be as bad. A relationship should start with an open heart and if you can't let him in, how is he going to know how you feel?

This will be the first time you share personal things with someone and perhaps, more people through the broadcast. You lick your lips before sharing that bad experience with him, "I went through like a nasty break-up last year. My ex used all my money, maxed my credit cards, and left me with a debt that I didn't even know I had until we separated ways."

You sip your wine before continuing and put all of your hair to the back as it keeps flying from the breeze.

"So, not only that I have trust issues. I have a financial problem and that two hundred thousand dollars can truly fix my life," you tell him.

You softly gaze into his eyes as you continue speaking, "I was planning on not to spend any money here but after the previous thing..."

You avoid putting Jamie in the sentence and pause mid-sentence instead.

"I learned that I shouldn't be doing that. Obsessing over the money stops me from making real connections."

Felix nods and holds your hand, lacing his fingers with yours and it's nice that he chooses to listen and not judge.

"Me willing to break rules with you tells you of how much I like you."

What you're going to say next is a hard thing to do but you want to give him the chance, "And I decide to trust you."

This moment is special. By you telling him your problems and your feelings to him, that means, you're willing to let him in

"I think what we have, it's worth fighting for."

-

FELIX: I am beyond happy that she shares her thoughts and feelings with me. I think I... fall in deeper [grins]

-

His heart palpitations with the way you honestly speak to him and he feels like screaming his joy out to the world, but for now, he allows himself to smile from ear to ear.

"I appreciate that you're telling me this," Felix sincerely says.

You smile at him and he wishes that he can kiss you to prove how much he's thankful for your honesty and the chance you give him.

Just like Lana reads his mind, both of your watches chime and turn green.

"Oh!" You gasp in surprise and show him the watch.

Felix automatically looks at his watch too to confirm that it's not some malfunction so he can proceed to do what he wants without spending some money.

You crawl over to him and he wastes no time cupping your face, holding your face as he places his lips on yours.

The kiss feels so exceptional, tender yet intense, all-consuming, he feels like exploding with the warm feelings flooding his chest.

He pulls away from the kiss to catch a breath and checks the watch if it's still green.

"It's still green," you tell him.

Felix gently holds your chin to softly peck your lips, making the most of the green light to pour his heart out through kisses.

"I like you so much it's crazy," he mutters between pecks.

You smile back at him and are about to answer when he interrupts you with a long peck.

"I like you but—"

He stops you from continuing with another peck.

"We have to stop breaking the rules, okay?"

Felix scoffs because he knows that he caused most of the rulebreaks and nods, but now you know the real reasons why he broke the rules and he knows that your true feelings for him.

There's no use for him to break any rules.

"Okay," he agrees.

-

YOU: It feels good to know that Lana acknowledged our growth by giving us the first green light in the retreat.

-

The date was close to perfect if it wasn't for the cameras filming it but that doesn't stop you from enjoying it.

Felix is carrying your shoes after seeing you struggling to walk in the sand in them, walking back to the house feeling impatient to tell everyone that the two of you got the first green light in the retreat.

"Oh, they're back!" Poppy announces their arrival.

Everyone is already on their bed when you both walk in, you sit on the end of Maeve's bed while he sits on Jamie's bed across from yours.

"So, how was the date?" Heidi impatiently asks.

"We had a picnic, there was wine and food... it was nice," you give a concise description of the date.

"What did you guys do?" She comes up with a nosy question next and does it so innocently.

You laugh at her so Felix takes it over for you, "We had talk and making some real connection."

Maeve coo in response and puts her arm around you.

"And we got a green light," he finally announces.

"WHAT?" Maeve shrieks in surprise.

You nod to confirm and laugh as she hugs you from the back.

"I'm so happy for you," she mutters.

And Cole on the other hand points at him, "That's my boy!"

-

FELIX: Good morning! It's another day in paradise!

-

Felix used to be dreading it, locked in a sexless retreat and not allowed to even touch himself.

Now that he's with you, it feels like he's living in a dream. He likes spending all of his time with you and being around you. He likes watching you doing even the most mundane things such as putting on makeup.

"What is this?" He picks up something he hasn't seen before.

You turn away from the mirror and look at it, "it's an eyelash curler."

He looks at it in pure wonder, "How do you use it?"

You put down the brush you're using and turn your chair sideways, "It's like this," you demonstrate to him.

He tries to do the same but fails, he pinches his eyelid instead of curling his eyelash.

You chuckle at him and carefully do it for him, "There you go!"

Felix blinks his eyes a few times and looks at himself in the mirror, "Oh..." he coos in wonder.

He turns to look at you again, "Do the other one," he requests.

You comply without complaining.

"You guys are so cute. Stop it!" Mia says from the side of the make-up table.

That only makes him happy that someone is jealous of both of you and what you have. What can he say? He's the luckiest to find you, here, in a dating show, of all places.

-

YOU: We're so happy that even Lana can't ruin that for me.

-

Lana called us to the cabana as usual.

This time you and Felix can relax knowing that you have both been good. The rulebreaking days are over and way behind him.

But he wouldn't pass on enjoying the drama unfolding as Lana announces further rule break. It reminds him of how he doesn't want to be on the hot seat anymore.

"We kissed last night," Jamie admits his mistake.

Cole is so finished with him that he just stays quiet while Lana announces that another six grands have lost from the prize fund.

"As we approach the end of my retreat, I hope you put your focus on working on yourself and who do you want to be when you return to normal lives."

It's just hit him that he can't live in this retreat and hope things will always be this easy forever.

"Will you continue to grow in relationships or will you revert to your old player ways?"

He's proud that he's changed for the better and chooses to be in a relationship but in the outside world where temptation is in every corner of the way.

"Therefore, I encourage you to use your time together to find out once and for all if you're on the same page."

Fear starts to creep into him, one that he didn't expect to feel when he's just begun to figure things out with you.

"Goodbye," Lana finishes and leaves him in a deep thinking.

-

FELIX: We established things between us and it makes me think of the next thing. It's not uh... I feel nervous to even talking about it.

-

With the retreat nearing its end, Felix starts thinking of things outside of the retreat.

He thinks about what it would be like to come back to real love and tons of questions rush into his head. What he fears the most is the long distance and he knows what it would likely do to a relationship.

All of these thoughts are making him restless, and pessimistic about his future together with you.

"It's going to be so weird not waking up next to you and spending my day with you," you say as you cuddle in the hammock together.

"Yeah..." Felix meekly says.

His mind wanders off to the wrong side of things of what things would be and he starts to unconsciously make an exit plan.

Thankfully, Lana has a workshop planned for all the boys so he can use the time to think by himself. Worse is, it's only got him thinking about it more.

He starts to ask himself if this is what he wants.

-

FELIX: It's like there's this battle of new Felix and old Felix because the old me would run away when things get this serious.

-

Felix is never good at hiding things and you can sense that he's anxious about something.

You turn on the bed to face him and put your hand around him, drawing lazy circles on his back while your other hand gently brushing his hair.

"You seem... different," you lower your voice as everyone else is trying to sleep.

"Is something bothering you?" You ask.

He kisses your shoulder and then your neck, "Nothing," he lies.

You scoot closer to him and put your hand on his chest next, "I'm sad that the retreat is almost over," you say.

It's a relief that he's not the only one feeling sentimental about this when he loathed being put in a sexless retreat on the first day here.

"Me too," he takes your arm by the elbow, putting a trail of small kisses along your inner arm.

"Isn't it weird that... I'm meeting you here?" You lowly chuckle at the end of your sentence.

That makes him chuckle too. The thought that he came from the other side of the world and one day, he met you here.

Felix doesn't believe in fate but he thinks fate has an unexpected way to bring you two together.

"And our meet cute is in the bathroom," he adds.

You put your hand under his white tank to touch his warm skin, "What are we going to tell people when they ask how we met?"

He puts his arm around you and holds you close, "Tell them to watch Too Hot To Handle."

You softly laugh into his chest and remind him of the deed he did a few nights ago, "And let them see you fingering me under the cover?"

Felix often forgets that he's being filmed and it hits him just now that anyone he knows could be watching him.

"I hope my parents are not watching," Felix quietly mutters, then kisses your forehead.

-

YOU: Something is going on with Felix and I don't know... I hope that he's not having doubts about us.

-

First thing in the morning, Lana announces that he's sending all the couples to go on their last dates in the retreat.

It would be wonderful if Felix knew where his head at. He's still haunted by his thoughts of yesterday and he feels bad for not being able to show you a happy face at the announcement.

You playfully nudge his elbow, "I'm excited for our date."

He forced to put on a smile, "Yes."

There are hours left until the date and after a workout session with Alex, he finds himself thinking out loud on the beach with Killian next to him.

"What's going on, Felix?" He asks, brushing his wet hair from taking a dip in the seawater.

He lets out a heavy sigh and stares out at the blue of the sea, "To be honest, I'm a little bit torn about what to do right now."

Killian was there in the workshop with him and knows enough that he has fear of the unknown which is the future of you and him.

"I understand the fear but..." he wipes the beads of water hanging under his chin, "that only means it's important, it's a meaningful thing for you."

-

FELIX: I've been single for some time and it takes a lot of courage for me to go to the next step.

-

A few minutes before it's time for the date, Felix knocks on the wall of the make-up room, seeing you still getting your hair styled by Maeve.

"Hey," he greets.

You smile seeing his head pop in the doorway.

"Are you ready, babe?" He asks.

"Just a minute," you say, letting Maeve finish her task first before coming out of the room.

You keep your head busy by picking which accessories to wear, than trying to guess why Felix acts differently.

Maeve is gently combing your hair with her fingers and looks at you through the mirror, "How do you feel?"

You shake your head and sigh, "I don't know... I don't feel confident about us right now."

You catch the reflection of Maeve frowning in the mirror, "What if it was a bad decision that I opened up to him? What if..." You feel tears welling up and stop you from talking.

She hugs you from the back and thinks of something to cheer you up, "I'm sure it's just about the retreat going to be over soon," she says.

You shake your head again and you can't fight the tears coming out of your eyes anymore, hurriedly dabbing it with a tissue to not let them ruin your make-up.

Maeve squeezes your shoulder, "It's not too late for us to become a couple and win the money."

You crack a laugh and let her finish by spraying your hair, "Don't think too much and try to enjoy the date, okay, babe?"

You nod and hand her the necklaces to help you put them on and clasp them.

"I would love to kiss you again," she says with a grin, complimenting you to make you feel better.

-

YOU: I'll be going on the date and hope for the best [looks down]

-

For this date, they're sending you on a yacht to sail to the middle of the sea, far enough from the villa but still, with cameras surrounding you both.

It's always a good idea to start with a toast after pouring the drink into two wine flutes.

"Cheers!"

However, your observant eyes don't miss seeing the calm he puts on is different from the usual one.

"So... what's going on? You've been quiet the whole day," you tell him then sip your drink.

He gulps air as you put him on the spot "It's obvious, huh?"

You nod and take another sip to continue talking, "I can't help but think that you start to... falter?"

You do see right through him that he's at a loss for words for a moment.

"Uhm..."

-

YOU: What the fuck is going on? I need answers!

-

"I'm a bit lost. I'm sure about what I want," Felix begins.

He puts away his drink, the alcohol not helping him with his jitters.

"We got closer to each other now but at the same time, it made me think about what I really want."

He can see how you're getting so nervous listening to every word coming out of him that the glints in your eyes dim a little.

"Having a relationship means that I need to settle down and I'm not sure if I'm ready for that."

-

YOU: I'm worried for both of us at this point.

-

It's obvious that Felix has been in his head too much to even think of all the possibilities and only focus on the worst outcomes when there are a lot of ways to solve them together.

Before you offer one, you need to ask him one important question.

"Are you happy?"

You ask him again just in case he didn't hear you the first time, "Are you really happy?"

Felix gets quiet for a moment and you give him time to answer you, you know it's more than just a yes or no question. It will determine whether this relationship should go forth or stop everything right here before anyone gets hurt.

Felix doesn't answer but decides to explain himself, "With you know, I live in Australia and you're living in the other part of the world."

So that's what's been bothering his head. He's been thinking of your future together outside of the retreat and that's kind of thoughtful of him.

"How are we going be in a relationship when we're living far away from each other?"

From his slightly quivering voice, you can hear how visceral his fear is.

"There's nothing wrong. It's more about me just trying to figure some things out," he assures you that it's just him overthinking things that got him here.

-

YOU: For a second, I was afraid that Felix would say he wanted out of the relationship.

-

Felix takes a sip of his wine as his throat gets dry from letting out the harsh truth.

"That's what I'm afraid of as well," you say.

You stare into his eyes with your squinted eyes from the bright sun shining down on you, "But we don't need to settle in one place to stay in a relationship."

That he didn't expect to hear from you because he thinks you would ask for some stability or commitment from him.

"You said you're traveling a lot for your job and maybe when I have paid my debts, we can travel together," you say.

A smile blooms on his face as it registers to him that what you said is true. He thinks too much on the negative side of things when things could go his way.

"We still have so much to figure out but as long as we're together and willing to try, we're going to be fine," you add.

-

FELIX: I didn't think that she would say that.

-

"It's a relief that you feel that way," Felix says with a smile still plastered to his face.

Change is indeed scary but it's also exciting. Felix feels so much better knowing that you're willing to try despite the distance that will separate you both.

"I really like you and I want to be around you for a long, long time," he earnestly says

Felix found his want in that sentence, he wants to be with you but he fears that the real world will tear you apart.

"I'm excited for what's going to happen and the future we'll have together," you say.

That puts him at ease and convinces him more of what he wants. He wants more of you.

-

FELIX: I'm always caught up in the moment all the time and I'm just going to say it, stop overthinking things.

-

Chugging a glass of wine to give him courage, Felix looks at you with hopeful eyes and starts speaking.

"With everything we've been through, I am more certain about my feelings so I'm going to say it..."

From the way he gets antsy, you fear that he's going to say something pessimistic about the relationship again.

He takes a deep breath and you mimic him by doing the same.

"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

You scoff in disbelief and press the back of your hand to your cheek, feeling it heating under your touch.

All day, you've been thinking that Felix having second thoughts about the relationship and next thing you know, he's asking you to be his girlfriend.

It takes you a while to be able to speak, "Do you really mean it?"

"Yeah," he answers with a grin.

"I'm uh... I don't know what to say," you say, nonplussed.

-

YOU: Gosh, is this really happening?

-

Instead of beating faster, Felix feels his heart is slowing down and it will eventually stop beating if you decide to make him wait for your answer any longer.

Your eyes locked in an intense gaze with him and then nod, "Yes."

Swear he can feel his heart skipped a beat just now and it would be a perfect time for a green light, if not, Felix would unwillingly break the rules.

Lucky him, Lana delivers as both of your watches chime at the same time.

"Green light," he foolishly mutters.

You laugh and lean into the middle so he can kiss you. He's putting his hand on your neck to angle your head to deepen the kiss.

When he pulls away, he looks at your face with adoration in his eyes before going for another kiss, a deeper, passionate, and ultimately, romantic kiss that marked the beginning of this relationship.

"I'm less scared now about us going our separate ways once the retreat is over," he says.

The fear is now replaced with confidence that things are going to be alright. A thousand miles away is nothing compared to what you have for each other.

You nod and hold his hand, "I told you, I trust you."

Felix can't stop himself from smiling as warm feelings fill him to the brim, "Oh, I got myself a girlfriend!"

-

FELIX: I was this close to making the worst mistake in my life. I'm glad I didn't.

-

"Look at that stupid smile!" Cole shouts the second he sees Felix coming to the firepit.

"Look at them holding hands!" Heidi squeals.

You both sit next to each other with happiness drawn on your faces.

"So...?" Heidi asks, being her nosy self as usual.

Felix looks at you and decides to be the one answering for both of you. He licks his lips before speaking.

"We went on a boat, and had a long, heartfelt talk," he begins.

He turns to the side to see you smiling, looking at him with sparkly eyes that make his heart flutter.

"We got another green light," he shares with a stupid grin on his face.

Heidi leans forward, ready for any juicy details, "The question is... did you make it official?"

Felix glances at you to seek permission if he should be the one to share another good news.

"He asked me to be his girlfriend," you take over from him.

Heidi leans closer, doesn't want to miss the next answer, "And did you say yes?"

You bite your lip and then excitedly nod.

"Oh, fuck off!" Heidi curses out of jealousy.

"You guys are too cute. Get out of here!" She reclines on the sofa in defeat.

-

FELIX: We've had the best date today and I have the best girl in the retreat as my girlfriend. My life couldn't be more perfect!

-

Felix has springs on his feet, even when he's lying on the bed, he feels like flying.

He likes putting his body on top of you and letting you wrap him in your arms and legs. He's getting even better at controlling himself since it's no use to doubt you now that there's clarity in the relationship.

"It's our last night in the retreat," he mumbles as he rests his head in the crook of your neck.

"Mmh..." You hum in response while lazily scratching the back of his head.

"How about we blow all the money away?" He suddenly comes up with a very mischievous idea to pull a joke at you.

"As much as I want to kiss you. I don't want to waste any more money," you reply.

He looks at you and pouts for shooting his idea down.

"We need it for plane tickets," you remind him.

He nods in agreement and props his elbow next to your head, "Just one kiss," he seduces.

Your hand instantly flies to cover your mouth to prevent any damage from happening.

"I'll still kiss you," he says and kisses the hand blocking your lips.

He repeatedly kisses your hand then all over the face, getting soft in the head for how much he's into you.

-

FELIX: This morning, I reminisced about everything that happened in the last 24 hours and I realized how much she means to me.

-

"LAST DAY OF THE RETREAT! WHOO!" Heidi cheers in her raspy, sleepy voice then yawns.

Felix kisses your forehead as you're snuggling next to him rubbing the sleep of your eyes next to him.

"Someone is going to walk out of this retreat with $113.000!" Killian reminds everyone of what everyone could be at the end of this.

"Oh my, God! $113.000 is a lot!" Maeve says with a cute, surprised expression on her face.

"I'm surprised that we still have that much money," Laura adds.

Jamie points at Cole, "It's all thanks to Officer Cole right there!"

Everyone gave him a round of applause for voluntarily keeping everyone in line and sticking to the rules even though it might have not worked at times.

"I wonder who will win," Alex says.

Felix doesn't think too much about winning the money, he's been so focused on growing in a relationship with you but if he could nominate someone, it will be you.

-

FELIX: Everyone would say I'm biased, but I see her and her growth, how at first, she was scared to open up until she came to the point to let go of all of that when she decided to trust me.

-

Lana chimes in for her morning greeting.

"Welcome to your final day in the retreat."

It feels real now that Lana said that, this will be over soon and he has to say goodbye to this paradise.

"The winner or winners of the $113.000 prize has not been selected yet. Therefore, I encourage you all to use the 12 hours you have left to show me and your fellow guests why you deserve to win."

Felix feels sentimental once more. Despite the stupid rules, this wouldn't have happened without Lana and he wouldn't have met all of these wonderful people.

-

YOU: I'm going to use the best of our last day and enjoy it to the fullest.

-

"Okay guys, since it's the last day..." Maeve pauses talking to find something on the table.

"And before I go home to Ireland," she continues.

She looks at you as you sit on the other side with Felix tidying his locker in the same room.

"I need to ask you one thing," she says.

"Are you asking me?" You ask her, holding your eyebrow pencil mid-air.

"Yes uh..." Maeve leans in as she applies make-up to her eyes.

"Who is the best kisser? Is it me or Felix?" Maeve asks then burst into evil laughter.

Felix snaps his head and turns around his heels to see you, anticipating your answer more than Maeve does.

"Tell her, babe," he says to you, confident that his answer is him.

Without stopping doing your make-up, you answer, "It's a hundred percent, Maeve."

Maeve triumphantly howls and dances on her chair.

Not accepting your answer, he trudges your way and puts his hand around your neck, "It must be because I haven't kissed you in a while, huh?"

You tilt your head to the back and look up at him, "Nope."

He holds the sides of your face and leans in, "I'm going to remind you nonetheless," he jokes, leaning in to kiss you but his lips land on every part of your face except your lips.

-

FELIX: I'm excited for us and makes me want to let her know something I've been meaning to tell her.

-

After the last workshop in the retreat, everyone is called to the cabana.

"Hello, everyone!"

Lana welcomes everyone and goes straight to business.

"The prize fund now stands at $113.000."

"That's a lot of money," Cole comments.

Felix holds your hand because he knows that the money would be a great help to fix your life and he wishes in his heart that you'll make one of the finalists.

"Since your arrival in the retreat, I've been observing your behavior. Your ups and downs, your mistakes and breakthroughs. You all have shown impressive emotional development."

Felix couldn't agree more. He got caught in this bad habit of dating just for fun and look at him now, happy to commit to one girl.

"However..."

Whenever that word falls out of Lana's nonexistent mouth, it's always something not good.

"I have identified three finalists who stand out for their transformative journeys. And just one of them will take home the prize."

Again, Felix doesn't really care about the prize but his heart is racing, endlessly wishing that your name will be called.

"The first finalist is... Heidi!"

Everyone claps for her as she takes a stand.

"The next finalist is... Cole!"

Felix is more than happy for Cole, he's been working harder than everyone else in this retreat. He deserves it so much, other than that, he's a good friend of his.

"And the last finalist is..."

-

FELIX: I hope Lana sees the growth in her and she calls her name. [Clasps hands together]

-

Felix is more nervous than you are, his hand holds you tighter that it starts to sweat.

"Felix," Lana calls his name instead and he glances up in surprise.

"W-what?" He stammers.

But then Lana calls your name after and that's when it registered to him that she nominated you both as a couple to be the last finalist to win the money.

Felix throws his arms around and holds you tight, it's even better that you got nominated together.

He brings his mouth close to your ear and whispers, "Guess we'll be getting those plane tickets."

-

YOU: Wow. Okay? Wait— What? I can't believe I have the chance to win that much money.

-

"All three of you are the finalists. Tonight, one of you will leave my retreat with $113.000."

Felix hears you sniffle next to him and he pulls you for a side hug. You're touched that you're getting closer to what you want and because he knows how much this means to you.

"Please make your way to the dressing room and get yourself ready for tonight's announcement."

Felix holds your hand as all the finalists are being sent to the dressing room and everyone else will have to vote which one they think is the most deserving to win the money.

"It's so surreal!" Heidi shrieks the second he pushes the door to the dressing room.

"This is crazy," Cole is also still in disbelief that he got chosen to be a finalist.

Felix reckons that you need more time to compose yourself, he sits on the single sofa and lets you sit on his lap. He rubs your arms, giving you as much comfort as he can.

"Who do guys think will win between the three of us?" Heidi asks.

You shrug and hold Felix's hand, playing with the rings on his fingers.

"I think it's you, Cole!" Felix says out of courtesy.

"Yeah," Heidi agrees even though she doesn't sound very much like it.

-

FELIX: In all honesty, I think we deserve to win.

-

Everyone is taking their time to get ready for the last hurrah.

The theme is a white party so everyone is obligated to wear white. Felix puts on his white shirt and jeans while you put on a tight white dress with a deep cleavage, looking hot as always.

The only difference is that you look so tense and it's probably because you're nervous thinking about the prize. He stands behind your chair and gently massage your shoulders to help you relax.

"You're so beautiful," he whispers.

"Thank you," you mutter with a soft smile.

You pull his hands and hold them on your chest, looking at the reflection of both of you in the mirror. Felix loves what he sees.

The finalists are once again being isolated in the dressing room while they make the rest waiting outside.

"Whatever happens, I'm so proud of all of you," Cole earnestly says.

Felix offers his hand for a fist bump to him, "So proud of you, man!"

Heidi excitedly giggles and shouts, "May the best one win."

-

FELIX: We brought out the best in each other and are proud of our journey. Forget about the money, I'm leaving with a girlfriend.

-

Everyone welcomes all the finalists with cheers and whistles, taking a turn to hug everyone and greet each other.

"How are you feeling, babe?" Maeve asks you.

You let out a big sigh, "I'm close to having a panic attack," you jokingly answer.

"Good evening, everyone!" Lana as the host of the party, greets everyone.

"During the time in my retreat, you broke the rules 18 times!"

You and Felix look at each other then chuckles at the same time, remembering that the two of you contributed six times out of those eighteen.

"Throughout your stay, I have also observed people commit to the process and ultimately make a significant change."

Everyone is nodding in agreement and silently reminiscing about the time we had in the retreat.

"Finalists, your fellow guests have been voting for which one of you should win. The time has come to announce the winner."

He can feel your hand slightly shaking his and he tries his best to stay calm even though his heart is pounding in his chest.

"Finalists, please stand up!"

Offering his hand to you, you take it to help you get up from the chair and stand close to Lana's cone-shaped body.

"Good luck," Maeve quietly wishes you.

You stand close to each other and Felix rests his hand on the arch of your back, rubbing it up and down your spine to soothe you.

"The votes have been counted and only one of you can take home $113.000."

He looks at you and gets the confidence that no matter what the result is, he'll be alright, you and him will be alright.

"On third place is..."

Felix squints his eyes in fear, getting faint from the anticipation.

"Heidi."

You both look at each other with bewilderment on your faces, can't believe that everyone voted for two of you in the top two.

"And for the first winner is..."

Felix badly needs something to hold on to, he gets behind you so he can hug you from the back and clasp your hands together in front of you.

He flashes a smile at Cole, knowing that the winner is between the two of you and Cole.

"Cole."

Sure, he's disappointed that the two of you didn't win the money but it doesn't cancel out the growth you have gone through together. Mostly, he's thankful to have found you.

He hugs you tight and kisses your cheek, "I'm so thankful for you," he says.

You hug him back and mutter, "You have to help me pay my debts," you joke and rest your head on his chest.

Felix may have lost the money but he feels like a winner having you by his side.

-

FELIX: We didn't win the money but I got the most beautiful girl in the retreat [looks at you]

YOU: [Nods] I still prefer the money though.

FELIX: [Aggressively kisses your neck]

-

Everyone takes another turn to hug and congratulate each other.

It feels real now that the retreat is over and he probably wouldn't meet them again since they're from all over the world.

Cole pops open a bottle of champagne and sprays it at everyone, a few drops landing on his shirt and your hair.

"Congratulations! My retreat rules no longer apply," Lana concludes for the last time.

Felix has so much to say to you but before that, a kiss is what he needs right now.

He cups your face and softly puts his lips on yours, kissing you with such love that his heart rattles in his chest, overflowing with happiness.

-

FELIX: [Looks at you] I'm so proud of you and I... I love you [turns your head to kiss you]

YOU: Well, I love you too. [Chuckles]

FELIX: Really?

YOU: [Nods]

FELIX: [Holds your chin] I love you so much [pecks your lips]

-

The sounds of fireworks going off surprise everyone, lighting up the night sky with bright colors.

He turns you around to watch them together and holds you close, his mouth resting close to your ears.

"I'm so lucky," he whispers with a delightful sigh.

"I couldn't pick a better girl," he adds.

The 'you' that entered this retreat would choose money over him but the 'you' leaving the retreat is different. You grow into someone who's not afraid to try and let someone in, and you're leaving with a boyfriend who is worth more than any material things.

You look to the side to show him how grateful you are for him and pull his face close for a kiss, now that the rules no longer apply, it's your turn to truly show him how much you like him through actions.

Well, in that case, it's going to be a long, long night tonight.

-

FELIX: Can't wait for our life outside of this retreat but for now, it's time to f—

-

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