𝑹 𝑨 𝑰 𝑵 𝑺 𝑻 𝑶 𝑹 𝑴

    I’ve struggled for a while on how to say this but I don’t feel like I can put if off any longer so...here goes!

   So--you know I love you guys and I’m not gonna stop rping, but I don’t have the energy to be on tumblr anymore. Maybe I’ll find fresh inspiration for one of my muses and make a separate blog (if I do I’ll promo it here) but right now I don’t have the muse.

     In fact I’ve not had the desire to be on any of my blogs. I love roleplaying but tumblr for me just--it doesn’t strike that joy anymore.

       I find myself wanting the ease and simplicity of discord more so I’ve turned to that platform mostly. If you want to follow me there you’re welcome to! My discord is Puppy Energy™#1995 and I’d be happy to keep rping with you there!

         Tumblr just isn’t a platform I’m happy on anymore and I hope you all can understand! Please do keep in touch and again, maybe I’ll come back--but for now this is goodbye!

          Thank you for everything mutuals and followers! For the memories and the laughs. I hope we’ll stay in touch on discord but if not--know that you always have a special place in my heart.

@militvs· said:can you sleep by me tonight? (for skye)

book meme | accepting

“If… you’re sure,” Skye says yet doesn’t move from his spot at the door. It’s an innocuous request & yet he finds his feet rooted to the floor. They’ve been living in the same apartment for a while now but he still feels like he’s crossing boundaries. This is Cloud’s sanctuary in a way & Skye’s an intruder. Although, Cloud’s never made it seem like it was ever an inconvenience to have him here. If it were anyone else they’d be uncomfortable at the idea but not Cloud so he takes those few steps towards the bed, holding his hands by his stomach, still nervous. He carefully crawls into the bed next to him with a small hum. This isn’t so bad.

        He almost laughs--almost but not quite. Instead a small smile spreads across his face and his hand reaches out, carding gently through the others hair. Cloud is maternal in nature and it’s like second nature to offer comfort even though he doesn’t see Skye as a child. No, they are equals--both lost in their own grief; their own demons. “I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t sure.” He comforts, eyes soft. Then he’s shifting away, reaching up to undo his hair and let the blonde strands drape around him. The soft lamplight giving him a glow of warmth, because right now that’s what he is. 

@militvs· said: “ please , let me listen to celine dion in the darkin peace. “ (for skye)

random starters | accepting

“Are you sure…?” His hands are on the doorknob, at a loss of words. This wasn’t what Skye was expecting when he entered the room. Of course he understands the original has his own demons to deal with but he’s uncertain if this is just a weird sense of humor he’s developed or there’s something genuinely upsetting Cloud. There’s only a moment of hesitation before Skye steps inside the room to sit beside him. “Would you like me to stay?”

         Survivors guilt--that’s what they’d called it when he first started going to a counselor. It happens less and less these days, but there are still moments where it weighs on his chest like stones. The emotions are heavy, tugging at his insides til the pain is almost physical. He’s found ways of coping; ways of easing the balled up tension that eats away at him. Listening to music is just one of the ways he’s able to calm the storm of emotions in him. Maybe it’s silly or odd, but he’s found comfort in the small sounds coming from his CD player. 

You attract: Hunger

Hasty fingers that run down your back as their lips make contact against your skin; feeling lightheaded as traces of "i love you"s make their way down your body; breathing in sensation and breathing out fear. you attract hunger. you are afraid of the unknown, so you dive straight into it. you fear the feeling of being alone, so you seek out those who give you ease and love and thrill even if it may not be the thing that you need. give yourself a moment to breathe, my dear. you still have more to explore. once hunger is quenched, you're allowed to stay. don't feel the rush of leaving. the adrenaline you get from running away won't ever substitute for happiness. you are deserving of love, always. let yourself get it.

Tagged by: @shiru-ka-yo​

Feel free to add on. italicize what’s possible. strikethrough what’s not possible.

REPOST ; DON’T REBLOG.

► Aesthetic

dark colors. bright colors. neon colors. soft colors. blood. forests. space. mansions. ghosts. asylums. wastelands. fire. injuries. hands. bare feet. dolls. fog. storms. galaxies. snow. dawn. midnight. cold. animals. sharp teeth. neck. shoulders. bruises. freckles. legs. feminine. masculine. burns. colorful hair. witchcraft. lips. webs. fields. corn fields. tears. sweat. glitter. flowers. plants. magic. fear. pain. murder. guns. blood in the snow. scars. missing posters. old paintings. strange eyes. explosions. creatures. weapons. lingerie. kissing. playfulness. metal. diamonds. rust. iron. stealth. running away. steel. glass. wood. porcelain. paper. fur. lace. leather. synthetics. robots. monsters. childhood fears. cigarettes. alcohol. cameras. video cameras. polaroid cameras. angels. phones. computers. war. peace. decay. sadness. red lipstick. powder puffs. abandoned cars. skeletons. strangling. overcoats. puppets. torture. syringes. old cottages. loyalty. hospitals. teeth. scary basements. butterflies. prosthetic limbs. cats. dogs. dreams.

► Appearance

thick ass. bubble butt. flat ass. toned ass. thick waist. narrow hips. average hips. wide hips. curvy frame. muscular frame. chubby frame. petite frame. lanky frame. voluptuous frame. lean frame. skinny. long legs. stumpy. average legs. thick thighs. muscular thighs. toned thighs. slender thighs. beer belly. toned stomach. flat stomach. feminine frame. masculine frame. six pack. Big boobs. small boobs. no boobs. harsh facial features. baby face. soft features. freckles. scars. moles. dimples. braces. tattoos. piercings. pigtails. messy hair. pixie-cut. bald. long hair. short-shaved. ponytail. clipped back fringe. shoulder length. bob cut. old-fashioned hairstyle. dreadlocks. bun. braids. shaved side. mohawk. buzz cut. afro. asymmetric. crown braid. wavy short. cotton buns. fade. comb over. side part. facial hair. styled goatee.

► Wardrobe

tight pants. jeans. shorts. short-shorts. jean shorts. pajama pants. dungarees. skirt-dungarees. leggings. tights. yoga pants. basketball shorts. lingerie. boxers. briefs. thongs. knee-high socks. socks. pencil skirt. long skirt. mini skirt. tutu. corset. sports bra. t-shirt. sweater. sweater vest. tight shirts. leather jacket. tank top. blouse. cardigan. button-up shirt. v-neck. crop top. flannels. hoodies. polo shirt. racerback shirts. boob tube. sun dress. 1-shoulder dress. Strapless. jumper dress. apron dress. shirt dress. ball gown. nightgown. High heels. ballet shoes. jelly shoes. sandals. rain boots. sneakers. stripper heels. flats. knee-high boots. cowboy boots. timberland boots. dr. martens. slip-ons. slippers. motorcycle boots. chukkas. loafers. dress boots. lots of layers. beanies. top hat. sunhat. cap.

►  has your muse ever…

broken something. had a near death experience. killed someone (and succeeded). killed someone (and failed). self-harmed. attempted suicide. had surgery. kissed the same sex. had sex. had sex and regretted it. lost a loved one. had a pet. gotten arrested. gotten married. divorced. cheated. gotten shot (at). been stabbed. witnessed death. taken drugs. gotten drunk. played with an ouija board. been in a car motorcycle accident. gotten stitches. invented something. had a kid. had something slipped into their food / drink. been kidnapped. been sexually assaulted. been bullied. bullied someone. had a stalker. been betrayed. been a traitor. been abused. gotten away with crime.

Me: I want a divorce

@militvs· said: “ DON’T YOU DARE! DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE! “ (for skye)

random starters | accepting

Skye flinches heavily.

He didn’t think his idea would warrant such a response from Cloud. No doubt it was irrational; running away from the problems wasn’t like the original. It’s another reminder that Skye is nothing but a defective clone. Even Cloud’s group treats him as such. Their actions speak loudly, & even though Denzel & Marlene are the only two who treat him kindly, it’s still enough to make him feel like an outsider.

Despite all the torture & experimentation Skye’s gone through he’s still the meek imitation of a country boy who had a husband & a child on the way. He’s the left over piece of a puzzle that doesn’t fit in, stuck in a past that’s not even his. “I’m sorry,” He says, bowing his head, hands trembling by his chest, “I just… Figured it was for the best.”

           And he goes silent, flinching away from everything like he always does when it’s just too much. “For the best...” The words echo like stones down an empty well; hollow and so utterly cold. It doesn’t matter that Skye is supposed to be a clone of him, or that maybe his friends don’t accept him--not yet anyway. The ex-soldier has been through far too much and he knows what he feels. But then, what he’s being told is it’s not enough and that has him breaking in a way he doesn’t know how to handle. “For me?” he says coldly, eyes being the only thing that betray his hurt. “Or for you...” 

              Because he wants to reach out and latch onto that wrist; to curl his fingers around the still slender build of it and keep him there. Yet he stays standing, arms going protectively over his stomach til he’s hunching forward. Cloud is curling in on himself, like it can protect him from the pain he’s experiencing. The anguish bubbles over til he think he might be sick--and then a sob echoes out into the room. At first he’s confused, until he realizes he’s sunk to his knees and is sobbing into the fabric of his jeans. It always seems to end up like this. 

                   Skye is always trying to run out the door and the blonde is just--he’s so tired of trying to get him to stay. “Why are you always...” he gasps out, lungs heaving with the weight of his sobs. Cloud isn’t one for crying, not much anymore--but he cries now. Because that’s the worst of it; he trusts the clone in a way he had only trusted two others; both loves of his life in their own way who were now long buried. “Why do you wanna leave so bad...” he gasps out at last, shaking. “Don’t you...want to stay with me?” And he cards his fingers up through his hair, eyes turning to look at the others feet as he begins to tremble with his crying. 

                      “I love you.” Rasps out between it all. His eyes drift from feet to meet the others gaze. He probably looks gross--tears and snot dripping down his face--but he looks anyway because he needs the other to understand the depth of his feelings. If this is the last time they’ll see each other, he needs Skye to know.