marriage is scary… what if she doesn’t understand my yearning for her
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@mikasmillins
marriage is scary… what if she doesn’t understand my yearning for her

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— arealliveghost
To all my writer friends who are on the struggle bus/suffering from writer's block/just dealing with life stuff right now!
i hope you never have to know the weight of being left before you’re even gone.
the quiet cruelty of being unloved in advance, of someone deciding—before you’ve even had the chance to be— that they don’t want you anymore.
Jules and Mika + forehead touches

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— 6:59 AM by Shane Koyczan
Mika quit.
Millin isn't handling it very well.
— beau taplin
thinking about how lena couldnt let herself cry in front of kara because she didnt want that to be the last image kara would have of her
they're in love, your honor.

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Chapters: 7/7 Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jules Millin/Mika Yasuda Characters: Jules Millin, Mika Yasuda Additional Tags: Post-Canon, no longer a fast burn but not quite a slow burn, Mutual Pining, they’re both clearly in love with each other, Fix-It, Grief/Mourning, this is a fic about grief ive come to realize, Eventual Smut, but i am making you (and the girls) work for it, Explicit Sexual Content Series: Part 4 of someday before the end Summary:
She and Mika said they are going to be friends. There’s been some vague discussions of ‘somewhere down the line’, which, she’ll admit, is something that makes her feel very excited, but for now, friends. She knows she’s not ready for anything more than that, not yet. Hence the compartmentalizing.
She can do that. She can set aside any lingering romantic or sexual feelings she has for Mika and focus on just being friends. Besides, Mika might not end up moving to Chicago. This could all be a non-issue, really.
//
Seven years after Mika left Jules in that locker room, they’ve settled into a new normal; this fun new thing where they are just friends
“He left a piece of himself with you and you are terrified he is coming back for it. Or he left a piece of himself with you and you are terrified he is not coming back for it.”
— Brenna Twohy, from Swallowtail
#julesmika: is it love to keep it from you?
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
honestly angst julesmika is one of the best things that could’ve happened like yes i want the longing! the sadness from not being together! the uncertainty of what the other’s feeling! that fear that you may never have this person back!
took way longer than it should’ve bc videostar decided to just stop working for hours (AGAIN)😐

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GREY'S ANATOMY — S21E1: If Walls Could Talk
Supergirl 5x07
Kara: Why do you have Myriad?
Lena: Well, you caught me. I have Myriad because I’m using you. Like you used me.
Kara: I never used you.
Lena: Do you remember when you finally told me that you were Supergirl? You were weeping big, crocodile tears. Well, I wept real tears. Bitter tears over you weeks before.
Kara: What? I-I thought... How long had you known?
Lena: I found out the day I killed my brother.
Kara: Lena, you didn’t kill Lex. That was me. I watched him, I saw him fall.
Lena: You saw him fall, but did you see him land? Did you see him die? I did, and let me tell you, it wasn’t pretty.
Kara: That’s impossible.
Lena: Anything’s possible when you’re a Luthor. Lex used his transmatter portal watch. I knew exactly where’d he go—the cabin we loved when we were children. So, I was there waiting for him. Had the gun ready. Loaded. I could feel the weight of it in my hands. Every fiber in my being rebelled, but I didn’t wanna do it, but I knew I had to because if Lex lived, the world wouldn’t be safe. My friends wouldn’t be safe. So, I forced myself to pull the trigger. I shot my own brother in the chest. His final words to me were that I was a fool. That my best friend, that every friend I had was lying to me. With his dying breath, he told me that you were Supergirl.
Kara: Lena, you have to believe me. I never meant to humiliate you—
Lena: No, when I came to this city, I promised myself that I would never trust anyone again and... then I met you. You chipped away at my armor with your warmth and your earnestness and you convinced me to trust in people and friendship again, and against my better judgment, I did. All the while telling you about my Achilles heel: betrayal. I confided in you that everyone in my past had betrayed me. And that how much it hurt to have someone you love lie to you and betray you, and I spelled it out to you OVER and OVER again, essentially begging you not to violate my trust, BEGGING you not to prove that, once again, that I was a fool! You reassured me ad nauseum you would never lie to me and you’d never hurt me. And all the while, there wasn’t a single, HONEST moment in our friendship.
Kara: No, no, that is NOT tru—
Lena: Now I killed my brother for you, for our friends! Don’t you understand what you’ve done?
Kara: When you found out, why didn’t you come to me right away, so I could explain—
Lena: Explain? Yeah?
Kara: If you hate me so much, why not out me at the Pulitzer party? Why pretend to still be my friend this long?
Lena: ‘Cause I wanted you to experience what you did to me. Feel what I felt.
Kara: I understand your pain and your fury, and... and you’re right! I made a big mistake, maybe the BIGGEST mistake of my life, but please, Lena, please don’t leave the Fortress with Myriad. Please don’t let my mistake push you to do something terrible! You are a GOOD person!
Lena: NO! No, you don’t ever get to tell me who or what I am again!
Kara: Did you reprogram Fortress’ defenses to attack me?
Lena: Yes. I rigged it to answer to this little button I have in my hand.
Kara: Are you gonna try to kill me?
Lena: No, Supergirl, I’m not gonna kill you. I’m not a villain. You shouldn’t have treated me like one.