Congratulations, ____. You’re a free man/woman.
You wanna be single by March?
I’ve had it up to...I’ve had it past here. I’ve had it up to here.
Just because we got gay marriage doesn’t mean we need to follow through, you know?
I want whips, I want chains.
I want a hundred shades of grey. He’s not even one.
Get away from me, evil woman!
I don’t want years of heartache and stalking and possible violence.
I don’t see color. I mean, I do see color, there’s nothing wrong with my vision.
Are you a pussy who hates her life choices?
No, no, no, no. Bra stays on.
I like to feel a connection of some kind.
You’re literally inside me.
Put everything into it or I’m gonna knee you in the head.
Like a genetic mutation - like in X-Men, but in vaginas.
_____ says he hasn’t bought any cocaine.
Do I talk about being bi too much?
What about everything we’ve been through?
All the times that I read you Harry Potter one, two, three, four, five, six, seven because of your bad dyslexia?
Babe, I’ve been trying to break up with you for the past couple of months.
How the hell was I supposed to understand your emoji text?
I have a very extensive wank bank.
Friends don’t fuck each other in the arse.
Like, arse-fucking could be nice for someone when it’s consensual.
My name’s Clementine Alfonso.
You’re completely humiliating yourself in a room full of strangers.
I mean, I don’t know shit about babies but I’m really good at buying stuff online.
Does this mean I’m getting paid?